Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Princess Mononoke, it all belongs to the genius Miyazake
Authors Notes: Please R&R! During the end it got harder for me to write, it was getting late and I was getting tired, tell me if it's too sappy, too fluffy, or if I did or didn't keep in character.
Nago's Revenge
It was finally nighttime and with the darkness came a cool breeze, damp with mist. Ashitaka breathed in deeply, enjoying the sudden change of weather. All day it had been humid and almost unbearably hot, it had been hard for anyone to actually get much of anything done. Now that they were done with their days work the women walked by in small groups, all of them waved to Ashitaka as he passed.
Iron Town was flourishing. They had almost completed rebuilding it, and they found a new source of iron that would not hurt the forest. They now mined iron from the mountains, and although it was farther away than the forest, it was safer. Passing travelers often spent the night, and decided to stay, and Lady Aboshi continued to gather women from the brothels. The population grew along with Iron Town.
It had been a long time since he had gone to visit San, and tonight seemed to be the perfect time to leave and see her. He missed her face and her voice. He missed her so much. He went to the stables and got Yakkul, his faithful red elk friend, ready to journey for a few days.
A guard walked into Aboshi's room, she looked up at him and he bowed then stood again. "My Lady Aboshi, there is someone at the gate. A girl."
Aboshi stood, she looked a bit unbalanced with her right arm gone but she had grown accustomed to the feeling. "I shall talk with her. Lead the way." The guard led Aboshi to the gate look out post. She looked down at the figure below.
A girl of about ten or so sat slumping forward on the back of a large black horse. She had long light brown hair and looked very pale. The horse nickered and looked upward, sensing the people above it and the girl stirred herself and looked up also.
"Please," the girl said, her voice soft. It seemed as though she spent much of her strength just to call up. "I have been traveling for several days, and this is the first place I have encountered. Will you let me in to rest myself and my horse?"
"Where are you from?" Aboshi called down. She always asked travelers the same questions before she let them enter Iron Town even if they were wounded.
"I have come from the far East." She replied. The horse pranced in place, eager to move on.
"May I ask why a young girl such as yourself has traveled all this way from her home?" The guard beside Aboshi called down. She did not stop him because she had been about to ask the same thing.
The girl paused; her pale face tilted upward, then spoke. "The people of my village have all died from a curious disease. Only a few who had not fallen ill escaped, and burnt it to the ground so the sickness would not spread. I was among the few who survived."
"What happened to the others?" The same guard asked.
"They grew ill too, and died. I'm the only one left."
"Do you have any family?" Aboshi called down.
"No, they were all at the village, they died from the sickness."
Lady Aboshi shook her head regretfully, "I am sorry, I can not allow you into Iron Town." She turned and walked back down to her room.
Ashitaka stood in her way, holding Yakkul's reins in one hand. "Aboshi, how could you just do that? Wasn't she just a little girl?"
"Ashitaka, she had come from a diseased village. She was already ill from the sickness that overtook it. If I had let her in here, it would have spread and all of Iron Town would have been killed." Aboshi replied calmly. "So you see why I didn't let her in?"
"No, I don't see why." Ashitaka said. He mounted Yakkul and looked down at Aboshi. "You just did to that girl what you se hated others to do to the lepers."
"The lepers can not spread their disease if they are not constantly in contact with us, nor can they kill us with it, but that girl could have." She said, her anger beginning to rise within her chest. "I only want Iron Town to live and flourish, don't you?"
"Yes, but I don't think what you did was right." He faced forward and twitched the reins, "Come on Yakkul."
When the two guards saw Ashitaka coming, they opened one of the heavy gate doors. Once he and Yakkul had passed, they closed it again as quickly as they could.
Aboshi sighed and shook her head, smiling slightly. "That fool, he'll get himself killed someday."
As the horse walked along a path that led to a nearby forest away from Iron Town Sakura used much of her strength just to curl her fingers in its dark main and hold on. Deep within her heart and mind she had known that they would not let her in because of her story. She also knew that she was sick already with the disease, she had known it would have come sooner or later.
The sickness was a strange one. At times she felt fine, almost normal, other's she felt weak and ill. Sometimes the hurt within her was too much for her to bear and she would black out, only to wake one the cold ground, the horse beside her waiting patiently, or, if her luck held, she would find herself on the horse somehow clutching it's main thought she had been asleep.
At the moment, she felt too weak to do much. It could be from her lack of food and water. It had been almost half a day since she had last has something to drink, and a few days since she had last eaten anything. She knew she would probably die soon and she wished to join her village and family, but she was also terrified. She didn't want to die.
As the horse moved steadily away from the town she felt herself begin to slip off into sleep. She would nod forward, then snap back awake for fear of falling and hurting herself. Finally, despite her struggles to remain awake, she slipped into blissful unconsciousness, slumping forward on the horse's neck.
It stopped, sensing that she was not aware. This had happened many times before, she would fall asleep while riding. The horse knew from experience that if it kept moving the girl would most likely fall. It stood still now and rested also, grazing on the grass around it.
When she awoke, she could feel warmth on her right side and felt heaviness upon her. She realized she felt better, not as weak as before and she wondered how much time had passed. As she stirred herself and opened her deep green eyes she saw that a fire had been made and she had been laid beside it.
She stopped, her eyes opening wider as a thought struck her. Only another human could build a fire, what if it was some strange person who wanted her for disgusting and perverted reasons? As she grew more alarmed and frightened pain suddenly shot through her like fire. She lay there whimpering quietly, trying not to cry out, trying to be strong and brave.
Then she heard a rustling, and a man's soft and gentle voice. "She's awake."
"Good," came a second, the voice belong to a woman. She felt a pressure on her side and kicked out in fear, rolling away and tossing the thick fur that had been covering her.
As she sat up she saw a man with short, dark brown hair and a woman with short blond hair and markings on her cheeks and forehead. Her heart leapt and she suddenly wanted them to hold her and comfort her, she had been scared and alone for so long. She cried out again as the pain within her grew angry and violent. She began to shake and her skin grew hot. The woman tried moving closer again, but Sakura moved clumsily away.
"What's wrong?" The man asked, his hand outstretched toward her as if it could steady her.
A sudden fit of coughing stopped her from answering. Her body shook violently and she grew paler. When it finally stopped she noticed the man had come over to her, his arm around her shoulders as he tried to still her small body.
"My village is dead." She replied, her voice harsh and raspy from coughing.
"Yes, I hear. I found you sleeping on your horse while you were on the trail to this forest." The man said. His strong arm held her shoulders as she coughed again.
"Who are you?" She asked, looking wearily up into their faces.
"I am Ashitaka, and this is San." The man introduced.
"I am Sakura."
"Please, let us try to help you." San said as she mopped the sweat from Sakura's forehead.
Sakura's eyes moved from San to Ashitaka. Slowly tears formed in her eyes and trickled down her cheeks. "I don't think you can." She said, her voice as shaky as her body. "It's like a fire is spreading through me, burning me from the inside out." She bit her lower lip and looked down at the ground. "I'm going to die."
Ashitaka looked at San, his eyes full of grief and pity for the young girl. He hugged her to him and she cried silently into his shirt. "We'll help you."
San sat beside Ashitaka, her shoulder pressed against his as she watched Sakura. "We won't let you die."
The three of them sat that way for a few minuets more until Sakura's body finally stopped shaking and she fell silent in Ashitaka's arms.
Ashitaka awoke in the dead of night. San lay sleeping in the crook of his arm, Sakura cuddled between them. In her sleep she coughed and pressed closer to them. As he lay awake watching her, he thought of how light she had been in his arms as he had carried her. His only thought then was that she was dieing and needed help. Now as he lay with her small body against him he felt that if she were to die, he would feel a loss greater than he would expect.
He gently moved a strand of her light brown hair from her face and she stirred at his touch. She nuzzled against him, her hand clutching the fabric of his shirt, her back pressed against San's side. "Mother, father," she murmured in her sleep. "Please don't leave me alone."
Ashitaka was startled, but he laid his arm about her shoulder gently. Soon he fell asleep again, Sakura's mumbled words echoing in his mind.
He awoke again as San shook him roughly. "Ashitaka, wake up, she's gone! Sakura is gone!"
Ashitaka sat up and looked around, suddenly fully awake. "What? She's gone?"
"Yes!"
He noticed that Yakkul was gone also, Sakura must have taken him. Why would Yakkul go with her though? Ashitaka stood and looked about. The two wolves that San had grown up with came from the brush.
"San, what's wrong?" one asked, he was slightly larger than the other wolf and his voice was gruff.
The second went over to San and she tenderly scratched his neck. "Ashitaka found a young human girl who was very sick. We took her here but now she is missing."
"You brought a human into the woods?" The one San was scratching demanded. His voice was softer than his older brothers. "Ashitaka has proven himself, he is welcome. Any other humans shall die."
"But she's only a child! She'll die without our help!" Ashitaka protested.
"No, she is trespassing." Said the large wolf. The two brothers turned and dashed into the forest in search of this girl that San and Ashitaka spoke of.
Sakura followed Yakkul, her hand gently resting on his back as he led her through the forest. She had woken before the others and had felt fine enough to explore the forest. Yakkul had agreed to come along with her. Sakura did not ask any questions, they only walking in silence.
She had found that she could speak with animal when she was about five. Her parents were not overly amazed for they had known that she was a gentle girl. She loved the forests and respected the animals within them.
They had once asked her how, but Sakura could not describe it. The most she could say was that she didn't have to say anything to speak with them or hear what they said. You only had to be willing to listen.
The thought of her parents hurt her inside but she fought back her tears. It seemed only days ago that she had woken up one morning, and could not remember what they even looked like. And now she as she thought of them the most she could recall was a hazy image, hazy and black with the impression of soft hair here, and a gentle laugh there.
She had dreamt of them last night. She could feel them beside her, holding her. She could smell her father's musty scent of leaves in the fall, she could feel her mother's gentle touch upon her face. When she had reluctantly awoken that morning, she almost cried at losing the dream.
Sakura shook her head, her long hair falling about her shoulders. She would not depress herself like this. She was in a new place, with new creatures and the trees surrounding her.
"It's so beautiful here." She sighed to herself and Yakkul. He wuffed and nuzzled her arm with his nose. As she smiled and scratched beneath his chin where he liked it a sudden crash from behind her caused her to spin around. Two large white wolves, their teeth bared, confronted her.
She stood and watched them quietly for a while as they stood shoulder to shoulder. Yakkul rested his head gently on her shoulder. "You are Gods?" She asked softly.
"Yes." Said the older wolf. "We are Gods, and you are a puny human. If you do not leave here immediately we shall kill and eat you."
"This is our forest, we protect it from you kind." The younger added.
Sakura looked at them with her deep green eyes. "Oh mighty wolf Gods of the forest. Forgive me, but I fear you ay die if you were to eat me."
"How dare you challenge us like that!" Bellowed the older wolf, he took a menacing step toward her, his teeth bared. "You could not kill us."
"Maybe not, but I have come from a village to the East that had been plagued with a disease." Sakura looked down at the ground. "I had been infected with it before I could flee, and now I am dieing." Her voice had grown softer.
The wolves paused. The older looked at her, his teeth no longer ready to snap her in half. "For one so young, you do not seem to fear death."
"Of course I fear death." Sakura looked up. "I only accept it because I know it is the inevitable."
The wolves were silent as Sakura lifted her hand and extended it toward them. She took a small step closer and they remained still. When she reached them she gently touched their noses with the tip of her fingers. They leaned into her touch and she burred her face in their furs.
San and Ashitaka can running out of the brush, but stopped in their tracks as they saw Sakura, the wolves nuzzling against her back. The older one looked at San, "She is very much like you and Ashitaka." He said.
"So you will not kill her?" San asked.
"No, she has proven herself to us." He replied.
"She is very brave, though she is young." The younger added.
Sakura looked up, her little fingers still entwined in their soft white fur. "I'm sorry if I worried you. Yakkul said he would lead me through the forest though, and I wanted to see the trees and animals."
Ashitaka smiled, not realizing what she really ment by saying that Yakkul spoke to her. "Next time tell us if you wish to explore."
San moved over and stroked her wolf brother's fur. She had reacted much of the same way as they had when she first saw her beloved Ashitaka carrying the small girl in his arms. But he had told her what he had heard, and she looked so innocent and frail, San's heart went out to Sakura, and she could see her brothers felt the same way she did.
Sakura patted the fur of both wolves gently, and then walked back to Yakkul. She did seem stronger than last night, though they could see that she was already weakening, getting sicker as each hour passed. She looked at San with her wide deep green eyes, "Can you find a way to help me? Like you said you would last night?"
"We will try our best."
"But what if you get sick?" She asked, suddenly thinking of her village and how the illness had started with one, then spread quickly to the rest of them.
"We won't get sick." Ashitaka said. He walked over to where she stood beside Yakkul and lifted her easily onto his back. "You should save your strength."
Sakura looked down sadly at her hands, which she had planted firmly on Yakkul's neck. "Yes." She said.
"She has a curious soul." The younger wolf brother pointed out as he stood by San. "Too bad it is dieing."
Sakura only remained looking down. She knew he was speaking the truth, and she was afraid to say it out loud because then it may happen faster than she wanted. San chided him for saying this, she was only a little girl after all.
"She has been forced to grow up fast." The older wolf replied to San.
"I don't want to be grown up though." Sakura said, suddenly growing stubborn. "I don't want to die, I want to play in the forests and be with the creatures, and I want my mother and father to be here." She lifted her arm and whipped away her tears. "But they left me."
"I am sure they didn't want to leave you." San said.
Sakura looked at her. "I'm not sure about that." She said, sniffing and holding back more bitter tears. These two always made her feel safe, but they both made her think of the ones she knew from her village, and that made her sad because all of the people she had over known in her young life were dead. "When I started to spend more time in the forest near the village they started to not even care if I was out all night. They didn't care how long I was gone or where I was." She slipped off of Yakkul's back and stood on the opposite side of Ashitaka and San. "And then it was like they had forgotten me completely. You know how I said they died from the illness that attacked the village?"
"Yes." Ashitaka said, looking over Yakkul's back and at the top of Sakura's head. "I remember."
"Well it's not true. I had come home one night from the forest and I found them dead together in my room, my room. Their wrists were cut and blood was everywhere." Her voice broke and Ashitaka could see her body begin to tremble again. "But on the wall they had written something. It said: Soon you shall all feel the pain and anger that I have, the last of you to die shall be the youngest. She will be the one that spreads the disease upon you, she will be the one who bears the most pain, she will be the one to destroy you all." Sakura gave a sob and hugged her arms around herself.
"I don't know what happened or why they died, but it was a curse and I was the youngest of my village. I as the one who killed them." She leaned her back against Yakkul as Ashitaka and San came around and stood beside her. "I wish I would die, so I would know that no one else would get sick and die. That's why I should leave this place before I kill you two." She suddenly looked horrified as a thought struck her. "What if I kill the forest?!" She suddenly broke into a run, dashing into a thick group of trees as fast as she could.
"Sakura! Don't be a fool, you can't kill the forest!" San yelled out as she and Ashitaka followed after Sakura, San's wolven kin following close behind.
They came through the thick trees into a sudden clearing. In the middle stood Sakura, her eyes were transfixed upon a large figure before her. Ashitaka was stunned to see that it was the demon Nago!
"You," Nago bellowed, looking at Ashitaka. "You are the one who killed me. Before I died I cursed you, but you managed to raise the curse and still remain alive. A life shall pay for what you have done, that life shall be this girls."
"What do you mean!?" Ashitaka yelled.
"Long ago, my spirit came across San and you lying together in the night. I took the new life that had started within San. I found a village to the East near the place where you had killed me and I found a couple that had only just finished the task that you two had only just preformed. I planted the new life within the woman. I watched as it grew within her. I watched it as it was born and grew in age.
"I found her again in the forest. She was grown and she looked very much like you two, she was your child after all. I knew it was time for me to finally take revenge. I followed her to her village and infested her parents with my tortured soul."
"No," Sakura whispered. "No." She fell to her knees, too weak to stand.
"Yes, I infested them and made them forget you, hate you even. I first had planned to torture you with them, but you remained hopeful that it would soon end. So instead I killed them and cursed you. You carried my seed of hate and anger within you, whomever you came in contact with, you spread the seed to them.
"When the survivors burned the village and took you with them they became infested also and died. Once your whole village was dead it began to crush your bones, tear you flesh, and eat away at your soul. You'll soon die, and I promise it will be painful."
Sakura cried out in anguish and pain as she doubled over, clutching her stomach. Nago laughed at her pain and despair as she lay sobbing. "Oh Sakura." Nago said with glee. "Sakura turn and look at the two who have been trying to save you, look at the two who make you feel so safe. Look at your true parents, the one's whom created you."
Sakura looked at Ashitaka and San, her cheeks wet from tears, her wide innocent deep green eyes full of pain. She cried out as she looked at them, sudden realization on her face. "Mother?" She called pitifully. "Father?"
"Yes, they are your parents. Why don't I give you the privilege of seeing them die? It will be like seeing the first ones again." Nago bellowed and rushed toward them.
The two wolf brothers quickly jumped and landed in front of Ashitaka and San, the crouched, ready to kill. Nago ran at top speed toward them, but as he came closer, they noticed that he was hazy and see-through almost. It took them by surprise as he charged into them, and passed right through. As he passed though, pain wracked their bodies and they fell to their knees. When he was past them, the pain remained.
"NO!" Sakura screamed as he charged through them a second time. "Stop it please!"
Nago stopped and looked at her, "What will you give me in return for their lives then?"
"You can have me, just please let them live!" Sakura stood despite the pain and reached her arms out as if she wished to hug Nago.
"So be it!" Nago bellowed and charged Sakura.
"Sarkura!" San yelled.
"No!" Ashitaka exclaimed as he struggled to his feet.
In the last moments before Nago reached her, Sakura looked at them. "Good-bye, mother, father." And then she was engulfed in Nago's demon body.
Ashitaka and San rushed to her, but were stopped by a wave of pain. As Sakura disappeared into the squirming flesh of Nago, she looked at her two parents, her real parents, and felt a peace fall over her. Then she was gone. Nago had swallowed her body and soul, finally he was able to rest, he had gotten his revenge. He disappeared, leaving San and Ashitaka alone together.
Why was she still conscious? Sakura knew Nago had killed her, and yet...she remained aware. After pondering her consciousness, she realized she felt no pain.
"Am I in the realm of the dead?"
No and Yes. Came Nago's voice. I have consumed your soul, and mine is finally able to res. Though you remain alive. Even he sounded puzzled at this.
"Are they still alive?" Sakura asked with sudden urgency. She had given her life so they could live, had she wasted her death? Had Nago killed them after all?
No child, I did not kill them. They remain alive, though it is as if they are dead. Nago seemed happy at this information. The realization of you surprised them, but they loved you anyway. You were their child after all.
Sakura would have cried with happiness when she heard that they lived, but she had the impression that she was only her soul, her body was somewhere else. "Why did you wish for revenge so badly?"
Because the human woman killed me once, and Ashitaka killed me again.
"That doesn't make much sense. If the woman killed you, how could Ashitaka kill you again?"
I may have remained alive, but my soul was dead. Consumed by the evilness that turned me into a demon. Nago's voice was bitter and angry.
"But didn't he help you? If you were in pain as a demon, he relived it by really killing you." Sakura pointed out.
Nago did not speak for a while and Sakura's conscious mind hung in the black void of what he had said to be in between life and death. In the silence Sakura wondered if she was not in the past, which was death, or not in the present, which was life, where was she? Perhaps she was stuck in what could be, or limbo.
You are wise for one so young.
"I was told it was because I was forced to grow up quickly." Sakura said calmly. "I have you to thank for my wisdom that you compliment."
You do not fear me any longer, why is that?
Sakura would have shrugged if she had a body and shoulders to do it with. "I don't know. Maybe because I know what you are now, and I know that I am already dead, or sort of, and I can't have life again so I can't die again."
Not necessarily young one. Nago's voice came, it was strangely soothing and gentle. Your body remains alive, and so does your soul. That is why you can communicate with me.
"Your saying I can be alive again?" Sakura asked hopefully.
Yes, I have seen the error in my ways now after speaking with you. I can return you to life, though your time here will have stripped the years of pain from you. You shall be younger upon returning. Nago's voice seemed almost sad.
"Thank you! I will not forget you or any of the other God's that protect the forest." Sakura said.
I shall miss your wisdom little one, for it will be stripped from you also. It seems you have helped me forgive what the human's have done to me. Nago paused, then continued again in a humbled voice. I only hope you can forgive me for what I have done to you.
Sakura was about to reply, but she felt a sudden detachment and the dark world of limbo seemed to slip away from her. She felt her consciousness enter back into the living realm.
For a moment she was above the ground, soaring through the air. Trees passed by her in seconds, blurring together. Then she was hovering above the body of a young girl. Her hair was short and light brown in color, done up in childish pigtails. The girl lay still, unmoving. Her chest did not stir even the slightest bit and Sakura knew she was dead.
Then a sudden realization dawned upon her as she recalled Nago's words:
I can return you to life, though your time here will have stripped your years of pain from you. You shall be younger upon returning.
This little girl of about five was her. Sakura thought back and remembered her years of torture indeed had started at the age of about five. Her parents started to stop caring about her and began hurting her.
But as she thought of these memories, they were taken away from her. She felt her soul being tugged toward the body, giving it new life.
San looked at the empty spot where Nago had finally taken Sakura. Her daughter. As they had disappeared the pain had lifted from herself and Ashitaka.
And now, she was left with a different pain. A rip in her soul. The girl whom she had felt tenderness like she had never felt before besides with Ashitaka. Her daughter. She was gone, dead. Nago had taken her soul and destroyed her body so nothing was left of her but a memory. Her daughter.
San didn't understand the whirlwind of feelings that welled up within her. Anger toward Nago for killing Sakura. Despair that she could not have saved her. Confusion toward her feelings. But most of all, the pain. The pain that brought stinging tears to her eyes.
Ashitaka saw all of this on San's face, he felt it too. The night that he and San had slept together he had felt a presence. At the time didn't know or cared who or what it was, but it had been Nago. To take from them their child.
He hugged San gently in his arms as they sat in the clearing. She was gone. The young girl who had called out to them in her sleep.
A clumsy rustling in the brush across from them broke their silent grieving. San had her dagger out in a flash, Ashitaka's short sword blade flickered menacingly in the dim speckled light.
A small whimper cam from the bushes, then a small girl with light brown hair in pigtails. Looking at Ashitaka and San with her large innocent deep green eyes she spoke her voice soft and young. "Muh-ma? Puh-pa?"
San gasped and stood. "Sakura?"
The girl gave a happy exclamation and ran toward them, her small arms outstretched, her chubby fingers eager to clutch at her parents. Ashitaka stooped down and caught the girl in his arms, then stood again, looking at San. He smiled at her, and she at him. They embraced with Sakura between them.
As the little girl contentedly clutched the necks of her parents, she curled her fingers in soft hair, she could smell her father's musty scent of leaves in the fall. She could not fathom for the life of her why her mother was softly crying, or why her father kept stroking her hair as if he needed to make sure she was there. What she did know was that she felt happy and whole.