G.I.R.'s eyes froze ahead of him, focused intently. Glass reflecting glass. A little light shining between them changing every few seconds. A melee of colors and sounds stimulating the small robot. The sounds from the wide screen overshadowed by tiny metallic laughter. The high pitched hollow giggles were a common sound in Zim's living room whenever the "Scary Monkey Show" was on. Between fits of laughter the little info unit slurped some cherry cola through a colorful bendy straw causing a loud bubbling suction sound as the can reached being empty. Seeing he was out of soda and that the TV was showing a boring commercial, GIR hopped from the couch and skipped to the kitchen to dispose of the can. He stepped on the lever that opened the trashcan and with a squeaky grunt he leaped up to the opening to toss in his rubbish. Forgetting that it wasn't a real trashcan he leaned forward and accidentally fell into the transport tube leading to the underground lab where his master had been toiling away all afternoon.
Zim didn't waste a second. From the moment he had come home from school he had been down in his lab measuring one thing, welding another, making precise calculations that would contribute to his plan. Oh what a plan it was, a brilliant plan swelling the pride of this already ego-strong irken. He was pleased how quickly his designs came together. It was perfect, a few more adjustments and it would be done, his greatest achievement yet. He fastened a few wires inside the casing of his project as the joyful squealing of his robot companion broke the silence. GIR fell to the ground with a usual and familiar clank. He quickly regained himself, shook off the shock as part of the fun of falling and took up his quest again to find something to do with his empty soda can. Zim, ignoring GIR's intrusion, he had gotten used to them by now, continued to connect wires inside his large mechanical work. It was a robot, the size of himself, in fact size wasn't the only similarity the android had with its creator.
Its arms dangled ahead of its hunched over body as Zim worked on its back. Its legs stood firmly holding itself up on black booted feet. Clad in standard striped invader uniform, over artificial skin toned lime-jade. Its relaxed face pointed slightly downward with closed eyes in suspended slumber.
Zim had taken no chanced with this one, every detail matched perfectly, it was almost frightening. If the robot hadn't been donned with the Black wig and lavender-blue contacts of its creator's earthling masquerade the two may have been indistinguishable.
GIR skipped through the enclosure hugging his empty soda can close to his chest. Scooting by his master's work station he paused before the robot Zim, smiled and chirped,
"Hi master!" A few skips ahead, less then a foot, GIR spotted the real Zim of flesh and blood.
"Hi master!"
The tiny I. R.U. continued on its way nonchalantly humming his doom song. After traveling another two feet he snapped to a stop, his little antenna recoiling as the information suddenly hit his computerized brain. He zipped around and looked at the two Zims standing before him. He looked up at one, alien form, diligently soldering some circuits into the back of the other, human form, standing still and silent. Back at the first, then the second, first, second, back, forth, one, the other. He tried to make sense out of it but with his limited capacity for thought he couldn't. Instead he frowned, pouted his lip, and cried loudly.
"What is the problem GIR?" Zim turned to the tiny thing narrowing his red eyes; annoyed he was being distracted from his work by his partner's incessant wailing.
GIR Sniffled and pointed,
"You're over here, but you're also over there. But you're over here and you're there and I'm here but you're there and here but there and here and there... and here... and there... and... I'm confused!" He gazed down at the empty can he was still clinging to, now crushed slightly. "And we're out of soda."
Zim sighed and closed the back hatch on the robo-Zim, uprighted it, and turned it so GIR could get a better look.
"This, GIR," He began "Is the answer to my attendance problem at skool. It's a Robot Clone designed to look like me in my human disguise right down the very last detail. I have programmed it to learn and adapt to the countless situations it may encounter while doing its job. Now when ever own mission requires me to skip skool, I can send the decoy in my place and none will be the wiser." He cackled under his breath with pride. "It's brilliant. I'm almost surprised I didn't think of this sooner." He faced his creation like some kind of twisted mirror, "If this works I may never need to go to that accursed skool ever again."
"Yay!" GIR shouted joyfully "Then we can watch daytime soaps together!"
Zim rolled his eyes, "Observe GIR, and maybe you'll learn something." He cleared his throat and shouted with assertiveness, "Decoy, activate!"
The artificial Zim springed straight up to a pose of attention, it's eyes snapping open as it saluted.
"Invader decoy activated" It responded, its voice identical to the one giving its commands.
"Decoy, state you mission." Zim ordered. The decoy remained straight standing and unemotional as it answered.
"My mission is to pose as Zim at skool, to assimilate data from class, and to interact with the humans in order to dissuade any suspicions that Zim is an alien."
Zim beamed, "Perfect" His smile stretched as the next step in his plan came to life. The robot was functional, it looked and sounded just like him, and it's programming would make sure it could calculate its way out of any situation.
"Those foolish humans at school will have no idea that I've replaced myself. This plan is flawless, the decoy will take the information it learns and relay it to me so I may use it to continue my mission to undermine this planet." He chuckled again "and if faced with another one of those..." he paused with disgust "tests, the decoy can easily pass it with the information it can store in its head."
"My head is full of jellybeans" GIR interjected.
Zim ignored the comment; his artificial equivalent moved its eyes to look at GIR. Its scanner screen analyzed its fellow robot.
[Analyzing: Information Unit G-I-R]
[Prognosis: - - - Comical]
"Pay attention decoy!" Zim snapped, regaining the robot's focus. "I'm sending you on a test run. For the next few days you will be going to school. You will assimilate the daily lessons, interact with the students, and report back to me with your findings. Do you understand?"
"Sir yes sir!" It shouted back.
"Yes," the alien smiled "now go, go my decoy, go forth and begin your mission." He pointed and laughed deeply as the decoy turned and marched for the exit head held high copying its master's prideful stance. All pride dissipated though as the robot clone tripped over a pipe lying across the floor and landed with a clunk flat on its face. Zim stared wide-eyed in disappointment as the android, instead of trying to right itself, continued to lay on the ground kicking its legs in the air in a continuos walking motion.
He sighed thoughtfully;
"Perhaps there are a few bugs to work out of its system."
GIR squealed jubilantly and ran across the floor purposely tripping himself over the pipe. He lay face down on the ground flailing his legs wildly.
"Wheeeeeee! I like bugs." He giggled.
The next morning the sun was shining brilliantly foreshadowing a potentially perfect day. A chilled wind blew passed as the front door to Zim's house creaked open. Standing in the doorway waiting patiently was his decoy, eyes wide open, motionless. Zim stood behind it proudly.
"Ready decoy?" He asked
"Sir yes, sir!" It shouted back strongly.
"Good" Zim smiled "Now remember your mission and make sure you take in every bit of useful information."
"Sir, yes sir!" It repeated. Then it took movement, walking confidently out the door down the walkway between the lawn gnomes and stopping outside the wooden fence to turn and head down the sidewalk in the direction of the school. Zim was very confident that this plan could not fail.
"Bye, bye, have fun." He shouted out the door playfully mimicking a parent sending their child off to school. The decoy took a second to register this command, then it smiled a small smile as it continued on its way.
Zim didn't waste a second. From the moment he had come home from school he had been down in his lab measuring one thing, welding another, making precise calculations that would contribute to his plan. Oh what a plan it was, a brilliant plan swelling the pride of this already ego-strong irken. He was pleased how quickly his designs came together. It was perfect, a few more adjustments and it would be done, his greatest achievement yet. He fastened a few wires inside the casing of his project as the joyful squealing of his robot companion broke the silence. GIR fell to the ground with a usual and familiar clank. He quickly regained himself, shook off the shock as part of the fun of falling and took up his quest again to find something to do with his empty soda can. Zim, ignoring GIR's intrusion, he had gotten used to them by now, continued to connect wires inside his large mechanical work. It was a robot, the size of himself, in fact size wasn't the only similarity the android had with its creator.
Its arms dangled ahead of its hunched over body as Zim worked on its back. Its legs stood firmly holding itself up on black booted feet. Clad in standard striped invader uniform, over artificial skin toned lime-jade. Its relaxed face pointed slightly downward with closed eyes in suspended slumber.
Zim had taken no chanced with this one, every detail matched perfectly, it was almost frightening. If the robot hadn't been donned with the Black wig and lavender-blue contacts of its creator's earthling masquerade the two may have been indistinguishable.
GIR skipped through the enclosure hugging his empty soda can close to his chest. Scooting by his master's work station he paused before the robot Zim, smiled and chirped,
"Hi master!" A few skips ahead, less then a foot, GIR spotted the real Zim of flesh and blood.
"Hi master!"
The tiny I. R.U. continued on its way nonchalantly humming his doom song. After traveling another two feet he snapped to a stop, his little antenna recoiling as the information suddenly hit his computerized brain. He zipped around and looked at the two Zims standing before him. He looked up at one, alien form, diligently soldering some circuits into the back of the other, human form, standing still and silent. Back at the first, then the second, first, second, back, forth, one, the other. He tried to make sense out of it but with his limited capacity for thought he couldn't. Instead he frowned, pouted his lip, and cried loudly.
"What is the problem GIR?" Zim turned to the tiny thing narrowing his red eyes; annoyed he was being distracted from his work by his partner's incessant wailing.
GIR Sniffled and pointed,
"You're over here, but you're also over there. But you're over here and you're there and I'm here but you're there and here but there and here and there... and here... and there... and... I'm confused!" He gazed down at the empty can he was still clinging to, now crushed slightly. "And we're out of soda."
Zim sighed and closed the back hatch on the robo-Zim, uprighted it, and turned it so GIR could get a better look.
"This, GIR," He began "Is the answer to my attendance problem at skool. It's a Robot Clone designed to look like me in my human disguise right down the very last detail. I have programmed it to learn and adapt to the countless situations it may encounter while doing its job. Now when ever own mission requires me to skip skool, I can send the decoy in my place and none will be the wiser." He cackled under his breath with pride. "It's brilliant. I'm almost surprised I didn't think of this sooner." He faced his creation like some kind of twisted mirror, "If this works I may never need to go to that accursed skool ever again."
"Yay!" GIR shouted joyfully "Then we can watch daytime soaps together!"
Zim rolled his eyes, "Observe GIR, and maybe you'll learn something." He cleared his throat and shouted with assertiveness, "Decoy, activate!"
The artificial Zim springed straight up to a pose of attention, it's eyes snapping open as it saluted.
"Invader decoy activated" It responded, its voice identical to the one giving its commands.
"Decoy, state you mission." Zim ordered. The decoy remained straight standing and unemotional as it answered.
"My mission is to pose as Zim at skool, to assimilate data from class, and to interact with the humans in order to dissuade any suspicions that Zim is an alien."
Zim beamed, "Perfect" His smile stretched as the next step in his plan came to life. The robot was functional, it looked and sounded just like him, and it's programming would make sure it could calculate its way out of any situation.
"Those foolish humans at school will have no idea that I've replaced myself. This plan is flawless, the decoy will take the information it learns and relay it to me so I may use it to continue my mission to undermine this planet." He chuckled again "and if faced with another one of those..." he paused with disgust "tests, the decoy can easily pass it with the information it can store in its head."
"My head is full of jellybeans" GIR interjected.
Zim ignored the comment; his artificial equivalent moved its eyes to look at GIR. Its scanner screen analyzed its fellow robot.
[Analyzing: Information Unit G-I-R]
[Prognosis: - - - Comical]
"Pay attention decoy!" Zim snapped, regaining the robot's focus. "I'm sending you on a test run. For the next few days you will be going to school. You will assimilate the daily lessons, interact with the students, and report back to me with your findings. Do you understand?"
"Sir yes sir!" It shouted back.
"Yes," the alien smiled "now go, go my decoy, go forth and begin your mission." He pointed and laughed deeply as the decoy turned and marched for the exit head held high copying its master's prideful stance. All pride dissipated though as the robot clone tripped over a pipe lying across the floor and landed with a clunk flat on its face. Zim stared wide-eyed in disappointment as the android, instead of trying to right itself, continued to lay on the ground kicking its legs in the air in a continuos walking motion.
He sighed thoughtfully;
"Perhaps there are a few bugs to work out of its system."
GIR squealed jubilantly and ran across the floor purposely tripping himself over the pipe. He lay face down on the ground flailing his legs wildly.
"Wheeeeeee! I like bugs." He giggled.
The next morning the sun was shining brilliantly foreshadowing a potentially perfect day. A chilled wind blew passed as the front door to Zim's house creaked open. Standing in the doorway waiting patiently was his decoy, eyes wide open, motionless. Zim stood behind it proudly.
"Ready decoy?" He asked
"Sir yes, sir!" It shouted back strongly.
"Good" Zim smiled "Now remember your mission and make sure you take in every bit of useful information."
"Sir, yes sir!" It repeated. Then it took movement, walking confidently out the door down the walkway between the lawn gnomes and stopping outside the wooden fence to turn and head down the sidewalk in the direction of the school. Zim was very confident that this plan could not fail.
"Bye, bye, have fun." He shouted out the door playfully mimicking a parent sending their child off to school. The decoy took a second to register this command, then it smiled a small smile as it continued on its way.