So this is part 5, all freshed-up *g* have fun reading (and reviewing!)

Conspiracy Theory
Part 5: Did!
By Ginny Ha-ha and duva

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When they had drawn apart once again, they looked at each other awkwardly. Lily was aware that her face had gone extremely pink, so that her freckles stood out brighter then usual. James looked just as sheepish, also going red.

"Er..." he said.

Lily wasn't sure what to say, but decided that maybe their usual footing [ie hate] was most familiar, and went with that.

"What is your problem?!"

"What?!" James looked genuinely shocked.

"You, you, you child molester!"

"Hey, you're older then me! And you made the first move!"

"Well, I was, I was, I was... er..." Lily suddenly thought of something. "Exactly why did you memorise how old I was, you pervert?"

James went redder. "I'm a pervert?! I'm not the one who, who snogged an innocent victim… urgh, I've probably caught the lurgies now..."

"You are so childish!"

"Whaddya expect?! I'm younger than you!"

They glared at each other with love and hate, each furious with the other, each unwilling to admit their true thoughts and feelings, each upset and confused.

"Shut up, cretin!" Lily screeched, seething.

"Don't call me a cretin, freak!"

"I have every right to call you what I want to!"

"Well, so do I!"

"Why they made a creep like you a prefect, I just don't know!"

"We've been through this! I didn't ask to be made one! You're saying that I'm a creep, well, who's the one who--" James stopped talking suddenly.

The infuriatingly hardy and solid form of Sirius Black appeared behind Lily.

"You're not the one who what?!" Lily, oblivious to Sirius, continued. James put his head in his hands. He was done for, that's all there was to it.

Lily continued,"Because you kissed me too!" She stopped suddenly, as the sound of Sirius' hysterical laughter rang through the hallway.

They glared at him as one.

"This is your fault, Black!" Lily screamed at him a second later, embarrassment leading to intense anger at Sirius, and memories of the plan springing back into her mind.

"I could kill you right now!" James added. Both were now united in their anger. Even though James didn't know exactly what had happened, he'd known Sirius long enough to know that he was a part of it.

Sirius looked from one to the other, and laughed.

Lily started talking, never taking her eyes of Sirius. "James, do you know what your-so-called-friend here did?"

"Nope," James answered, also glaring at Sirius.

"Well, he and Fleureat have united in their quest against us. You haven't possibly heard anything about me you shouldn't have?" Lily looked at him meaningfully, taking her eyes off Sirius for just a moment.

James' eyes widened. "You made that up?" he hissed at Sirius, who squirmed a little. "Hey, it was Stonesfield's idea, I was just an innocent pawn..."

James sniggered. "Innocent? Bollards to that!!!"

Sirius glanced behind himself quickly. He looked back at James, who was red with anger, the vein on his forehead pulsing threatingly. He swallowed.

"Evans...?" he ventured.

"Don't you talk to me," she said through gritted teeth.

Sirius turned his head to look at James again, who still looked as angry. He quickly thought over his options in his head... and ran away.

James shook his head. "Big wuss," he muttered.

"Don't worry," Lily said softly. "We'll get him later. Him and Fleureat both."

"I can't believe they'd do that to us!" James glowered, "I didn't think even Sirius'd do something like that!"

"It's just the kind of thing that Fleureat would do," Lily sighed, "She fancies herself as the Official Hogwarts' Matchmaker. It's rather sad, really."

A thought struck James. He grinned, "Say, Lily?"

"What?"

"If you hate me so much... why'd you, er... kiss me?"

Lily felt her cheeks go hot again. She decided that whatever happened, she was not going to admit the truth to James. She thought fast. "I was upset and kinda confused... I suppose, in a way, I wanted to make someone else feel as confused as me... my head was kind of messed up. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time." Lily immediately wished she hadn't lied. The look of James' face said it all. This wasn't what he had wanted to hear. Lily paused, then continued, "Well, come to that, if you hate me so much, why'd you kiss me back?"

James paused. Lily wondered if he would lie, too. "I... honestly don't know. I suppose it was a reflex action. Because I'd never date you!"

"Good." The word was forced from her. Lily felt her heart drop. It was one thing to tell someone you didn't fancy them, but quite another to be told that they didn't fancy you.

"Good." James repeated.

They stood there, looking at each other, not sure what to say. James shifted uncomfortably. He broke the silence first.

"Well, I... I'd better be going, then."

Lily nodded. "Yes."

"See you."

"See you."

"Bye." James turned on his heel and left. Lily watched him go. She was still confused. It wasn't until he had turned the corner that she admitted it.

"James! Come back! I didn't mean that! I, er... I..." her voice petered out. Why the hell did I do that?! she asked herself. A second later, James' face appeared back round the corner. He stared at her, eyebrows raised."Yer what?!"

"Nothing."

"No way, you said something!" James insisted.

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"All right, can we stop this now? You know what I said. Now I want to hear what you would say in reply. All right?"

"Well," James put on an expression of mock thought, "I would have said 'yer what?!', just like I did then."

"Well... well, suppose I had repeated myself," Lily said a little desperately, wondering why she'd ever started this, but determined to get the job done come hell or high water, "What would you have said to me?" James was silent.

"Would you have said 'you're a mad biscuit, so naff off?'" Lily prompted, "or have been a, a, a gentleman and given me a straight and decent reply?"

"Depends." James shrugged. Lily was beginning to find this an uphill struggle. James was obviously enjoying himself immensely now.

"On what?"

"On what I thought your reply would be."

"Well, if you were going to say 'naff off', I'd say 'same to you, you immature little cretin'. If you... asked me something along the lines of, er, romance... I'd be more likely to agree. Um."

James was laughing now. Lily sighed. Why did she have to fancy this moron, of all people?!

"So, tell me what you would have said next!"

"I'd have said..." James' insides were squirming now. Even though he knew Lily's opinions and answers, that didn't make it any easier. He had misgivings. Sirius would laugh forever. He felt like a fool. This was more than a little surreal. He'd kind of... well, imagined dating Lily, but... well. He'd never thought that he'd even contemplate asking. She'd always hated him, after all. And suddenly she was admitting all the stuff, pride forgotten, about as subtle as a large herd of rhino. He took a deep breath. There was nothing for it, really... "Lily?"

"Yes?"

"Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Are you sure? Well... all right!"

It felt strange to both James and Lily. They were used to an opposite state of affairs. This wasn't... exactly romantic. Not really. It was formal. If this had been half an hour ago, it would have worked, but now they felt awkward and embarassed.

James broke the silence.

"Just because Sirius and Stonesfield were right... doesn't mean we can't kill them both, does it?"

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Ummmm.... please read and review!!!

Ginny Ha-ha and duva