Title: Twin Beds
Author: Ras
Rating: PG-13 Warning contains a male-male loving situation. No sex or violence, though.
Summary: Hurt/Comfort Chihaya is crying himself to sleep. Can Kagetsuya get Chihaya to trust him enough to tell him what's wrong?
Disclaimer: An artist much more talented than I am created Earthian and its characters. I don't own them, I'm just borrowing them to increase appreciation of the anime. Please don't sue.
Kagetsuya angrily tossed onto his back in frustration. Nothing would allow him to sleep through the weeping sounds emanating from his partner's side of the room. Kagetsuya had noticed that Chihaya had been unusually quiet and depressed at dinner, but he hadn't thought much of it. However, the little black angel had been crying since he had presumed that Kagetsuya had fallen asleep, nearly an hour ago. He couldn't stand the sound of Chihaya in pain any longer. Kagetsuya permitted his head to fall to the right so that he could glance over at his roommates bed. Chihaya was laying in the fetal position, facing away from him so that he couldn't see his face, but his tiny body shook with each sob. "Chihaya, what's wrong?"
"N-n-n-othing," Chihaya cried.
"If it's nothing, then why are you crying?" he asked calmly.
"I . . . I'm sorry, Kagetsuya. I didn't mean to wake you up. Go, go back to sleep . . . I'll try to be quieter," Chihaya whispered.
Kagetsuya groaned as he stood up. "No, neither one of us is going to get any sleep until you get this off your chest," he said as he plopped down on his partner's twin bed. "So, out with it. What's bothering you?"
"You won't understand," Chihaya whimpered.
"Try me."
Chihaya stared at the crack where the floor met the wall while the tears trickled down onto the pillow. He couldn't look at his partner, not now. He took a deep breath, trying to muster the courage to explain his pain to Kagetsuya. "I read a book about Earthian history today."
"Umm, yes, I can see why that would depress anyone . . ." the sob that escaped from Chihaya instantly revealed that he had said the wrong thing, "I'm sorry, Chihaya . . . I promise not to make fun of you." He laid a reassuring hand on Chihaya's arm, rubbing up and down it gently. "Go on, why did the book upset you?"
"It said that Earthians use to enslave other Earthians just because their skin was a different color. The white Earthians stole the black Earthians from their families, and chained them, and beat them, and made them work in their fields. Even after they stopped having slaves, they treated the black Earthians horribly because they thought the black Earthians were bad and an 'inferior race.' The white Earthians didn't even consider the black Earthians to be human."
"I know what you're thinking Chihaya, but you couldn't be more wrong."
"Really?" the dark haired angel's eyes lit up with hope at his partner.
"You think that we're doing the same thing to the Earthians, but you're wrong. It's completely different. The Earthians are doing bad things. They're polluting the environment and endangering our planet as well. When we destroy the Earthians, it will be in self-defense. And, besides, we are at least investigating to find out if maybe the Earthian's aren't so bad. That's certainly more than the white Earthians gave the black Earthians."
Chihaya sighed and lowered his head in shame and despair. He let the tears flow freely, trickling down his cheek to the already soaked pillow.
"What?" Kagetsuya cupped Chihaya's chin in his hand and forced him to look up at him. "Chihaya, what is it?" He wiped the tears from his little angel's cheek. "It's okay, Chihaya, you can tell me."
"Do you . . . do you think . . ." Chihaya's crying became more intense and he was forced to look away from the white angel's shining face. "I . . . I KNOW I'm inferior because my wings are black, but do you . . . do you think that I deserve to be chained, and beaten, and enslaved? It's, it's the same thing, isn't it? The white Earthians hated the black Earthians because their skin was black, and, and . . . my wings are black." He resumed his previous comfort mechanism of sobbing and rocking himself back and forth in the fetal position.
"Chihaya . . ." Kagetsuya gasped in astonishment. He knew Chihaya felt slightly ostracized because of his mutation, but he had no idea that the pain ran this deep.
Chihaya's lips quivered for control, "Is . . . is that what the other angels think? That, that it's okay to hurt me, because I'm not even . . . even really an angel?"
"Chihaya . . . Oh Chihaya, come here," Kagetsuya scooped his tortured companion up into his strong embrace. Chihaya buried his face in Kagetsuya's chest, his entire body trembled as his cries crescendoed to the apex of his pain. "It's okay, Chihaya," Kagetsuya comforted, rubbing Chihaya's back patiently letting him release his anguish. "Chihaya, you are NOT inferior. You're a BEAUTIFUL angel that God gifted with stunning black wings. And I promise, Chihaya, if anyone ever tries to hurt you, I'll be there to protect you. I'll never let anyone hurt you, I promise."
"You, you think I'm pretty?" Chihaya looked up directly into the eyes of the giver of such a compliment. His eyes swelled with hope, displacing more tears. "Even though my wings are black, you . . . you still think I'm pretty?" Chihaya's mind swirled, was such a thing possible? Could another angel actually see his black wings and not find him disgusting? Could Kagetsuya, such a noble and beautiful angel, actually think of him that way?
"I think that you are THE most beautiful angel that I have EVER seen," Kagetsuya revealed. Chihaya fell back into Kagetsuya's chest and bawled. He wasn't even sure why he was crying anymore except that it felt good to release it, all the pain and shame that had haunted him since the moment he had realized that he was different. Kagetsuya loved him, and that was all that mattered.
Kagetsuya continued to comfort his hurt angel by petting his hair, rubbing his back, and whispering reassurances in his ear. Eventually, his little one exhausted himself and his sobbing slowed. "That's it, all better now, it's all out," Kagetsuya whispered. "Try and get some sleep, Chihaya. You'll feel better if you do."
Chihaya nodded, and reluctantly released from Kagetsuya's comforting embrace to lay his head on his moist pillow. He curled his knees into his chest, trying to find solace away from his protector's warmth. To his surprise, Kagetsuya stayed and petted his head and shoulders more to soothe him to sleep. "Ka--Ka-Kagetsuya . . .?"
"Yes, Chihaya," he whispered softly.
"Will you sleep with me tonight? I . . . I feel so much better when you are with me."
"Of course." Kagetsuya lowered himself to Chihaya's side and wrapped his body around him. Chihaya turned in to face his lover and nuzzled against his chest. Somehow, Kagetsuya loved him even if his wings were black. For the first time in his life he felt safe and content.
"Chihaya?"
"Hmm?"
"What would you think if we got rid of the twin beds?"
"You mean sleep together all the time?"
"Ummhmm, how would you feel about that?"
"I'd like that very much, Kagetsuya," Chihaya smiled for the first time in a long time. "I'd love to sleep with you every night."