First AN: I wrote this story before "The Gift", so Buffy never died ... then.
FIC: Memories of Sunnydale
Author: Jill
Disclaimer: I SO do not own them - sigh, so don't sue.
Distribution: Want it, take it, but tell me where it goes
Spoilers: the whole B/A-thing
Summary: after years of absence Angel's needed back in Sunnydale
Timeline: set into the future
Rating: mostly like the show, I think
Feedback: pretty please!!!
Dedication: To Claire, who did the beta-ing! Thanks, luv!!! The credits for the
title go to her!!!!
AN: For this story, Angel left Buffy after Grad 2, with all the tears and
heartbreak. BUT neither IWRY nor Sanctuary happened the way it did in the show.
Angel came back to Sunnydale in Pangs, and Buffy went to see him in IWRY, but he
didn't turn human. They just agreed to stay friends and accepted that their
relationship - although they loved each other - couldn't work. As a result Buffy
went to LA in Sanctuary, but they didn't fight. She just helped with Faith.
The PTB even expected him to stay near to the slayer to help her if needed.
(Remember what Whistler said in Becoming about Angel's destiny. I never get over
the fact that Joss just forgot about it with a snip of his finger - sigh). So he
went to Sunnydale from time to time to help out. Anything else is explained in
the story.
AN2: I'm not good at that future stuff. You know electronic things and all. So
although it's set in the future, the basic things I just take from the present.
MAJOR ANGST WARNING - CHARACTER DEATH
Chapter 1: The Return
Sunnydale 2060
It felt awkward, he had to admit. It had been so many years since he'd been
there. A half life ago actually. A human life that was. For a vampire like him
it wasn't that much or shouldn't be.
Sunnydale.
A name that still haunted his dreams, forever connected with a dream that
wasn't meant to be. Forever connected with the only woman he'd ever loved.
Walking down the streets in the moonlight the whole scenery had changed and was
yet so familiar, he knew every corner, every street and still discovered
something new. It warm and a soft breeze played in the air. He expected her to
come around the corner and smile at him, a little bit uncertain of herself but
determined in her duty. Her movements fluent and deadly, her strength
admirable.
Buffy.
She belonged to the dark streets as did he and yet he'd refused to believe this
a long time ago.
He'd left her so many years ago, sacrificed everything he ever wanted, ever
dreamed of for her, to give her the chance of as much normality as
possible. And had never left her completely. She'd never been out of his mind
or his protection. Silently he'd kept contact with Giles as long as Buffy had
been on active duty. Retired at the age of 40 she'd been the oldest slayer in
history and part of her success had been Angel's backup when needed.
He'd danced at her wedding with Riley when she was 25, he'd held her in his
arms when they were divorced five years later. She'd remarried at the age of
33. Brian had been a nice guy, but had been killed in Buffy's last year as a
slayer, leaving her with three children, two from her marriage with Riley, one
with Brian. Daniel, Moira and Faith, all of them beautiful, intelligent and
not his !.
After she'd retired from slaying the PTB had summoned Angel to Europe. His
strength was needed somewhere else. And inwardly he was glad. To be near her
and to not be allowed to be *near* her was a torture that outweighed everything
he'd ever experienced in his long un-life. To see her with other men, to see her
carrying other men's children. So he actually welcomed the change, he'd spent 40
years away from America, spending his time between England, Italy and France.
He'd even set foot into Romania for a short time. Enough time to remove the
clause from his curse, but too late for her.
And now he was back. Back because Buffy wanted it that way. Because she had
summoned him.
Suppressing the urge to shuffle his feet on the ground he looked at the wooden
door in front of him. Taking a deep unnecessary breath he reached out and
knocked. After a moment he heard a sound and then the door opened. She had
grown old, her body fragile, her hair white, her face wrinkled, the hands
calloused and freckled and now she smiled.
"Angel." The smile was genuine and surprised at the same time as if she
couldn't believe he'd come.
"Willow," the vampire smiled back. "It's ... well, I suppose it is good to see
you," he looked a bit sheepishly.
She gestured with her hand, "Don't fuss. I'm old and fragile, but I'm so glad
to see you. Come in." She moved aside to let him in and showed him into her
living-room. "Can I get you anything? I've made myself some tea, you want a
cup."
More because he felt obliged to he nodded. So she went into the kitchen and
returned with a mug in her hand only seconds later. For her eighty years
Willow was still very mobile. And her eyes still held that slightly innocent
expression. It was something that drew others towards her.
"Now," she said after a moment, "sit down." She handed him the steaming mug and
looked at him. "I wasn't sure you'd come."
"I," he cleared his throat and began again, "I wasn't sure either. I ... I'm
still not sure I can go through it."
"I know," she nodded and blinked to keep the welling tears from falling. "It's
hard for me too." When she saw him nod she continued, "They're all gone now.
It's only me who's left. It's getting lonely."
"Willow..."
"No," she raised a hand, "Don't pity me. It's what happens when you're getting
old. I should've gotten used to it, but somehow," she sighed. "I've been around
death a lot, that's for certain, but it seems you get never used to it.
Especially when it affects friends."
"No, you never get used to it," Angel affirmed. He knew what she was going
through. He'd lived with it since the moment the gypsies had restored his soul.
He'd seen people come and go, birth and death, the circle of life. Something
natural and normal. He knew it was him who was far from the norm, but it didn't
keep him from missing people he'd known, he'd grown fond of.
"Giles we expected to go before us," she began almost talking to herself. "He
was after all over 20 years our senior, but it hurt. Oh, it hurt. I was over 40
at that time, but I suddenly felt lost. I know he was mostly Buffy's mentor, but
we all, the whole gang didn't have the best of homes and we ... we just relied on him. Suddenly he was gone. I'm only glad Buffy was retired by then. You both
were just great when Brian was killed. Without you," she shook her head, "I don't know if she'd have made it through all this."
Then she suddenly looked him in the eye, "She loved Brian, you know. More than
she loved Riley," she had to laugh at that, "much more. But ... there was
always a part of her they couldn't reach. Her men, I mean. She had two lovers
after she was retired, did you know that?," then shaking her head at this stupid
question she said, "of course you'd know that."
"Yes, I did," he replied quietly.
"Yeah," she breathed and sipped at her coffee. "She made the best of her life.
Without you I mean."
"Willow, I..."
"No, I'm not blaming you or her. If someone's to blame it's Faith. It really
sucked regarding you two."
He had to smile at her teenage expression. It didn't fit the old, elegant
woman sitting opposite to him, and yet it fitted perfectly.
"When Xander died," she continued the subject she'd started earlier, "Well, it
was hard. Dying of cancer at the age of 50. It was too early," she sighed
again, "but then that's the way life goes, doesn't it. Then Anya shortly after
him." She suddenly frowned, "Did I ever tell you that we never found her body,
I still suspect that she contacted D'Hoffren and returned to her vengeance
business." She had to grin at that and Angel couldn't help but smile.
She shrugged, "If they'd had children then maybe I would think she'd really
died, but so..., never mind." Suddenly her eyes watered, "and then Oz," she
sniffed. "It's almost twenty years now, but still." Frowning she gazed at him, "I shouldn't complain. At least I had more than 40 wonderful years with him. That's more than most people get. When he died I shortly considered joining him, you know."
"Willow," Angel gave her a sympathetic look.
"Don't tell me you didn't think about suicide? I wouldn't believe it, because I
know you." Seeing his sheepish smile she nodded. "Exactly what I thought. But
we can't just go and take our lives, there's still too much to do." She sighed
again. "And then Cordelia."
At the mention of the brunette's name she saw grief flicker over Angel's
features. After he'd left America he'd kept the closest contact with her. She'd
died aged 70 together with her husband Wesley being attacked by a bunch of
demons. They weren't in the demon business anymore, they'd just been in the
wrong place at the wrong time. A dark alley after a visit to the opera. At least
it had been a quick and almost painless death with the demons snapping their
necks in an instant. Their two daughters were living in Australia now, both
happily married and having their own children there. Angel had never contacted
them, too frightened to endanger them. He didn't want any vampire or demon to get attracted to someone he would care about.
"But somehow," the witch said with a sigh, "I always thought Buffy would stay
with me. And now," again tears welled up in her eyes. They weren't the same
than before when she'd spoken of Oz, they were more intense, there was more grief behind them, because the loss was fresh. "But to lose both of them, actually all three because of a plane crash," now she couldn't stop the tears any more. They were streaking down her pale cheeks.
Angel's face wore a stoic expression, he'd already wept all his tears. They
weren't any left. All that the former red-head saw was the deep grief in his
dark eyes, he'd lost the only thing that really mattered to him. The only person
that ever touched his soul enough to lose it.
"I'm sorry," Willow said after a while and wiped her face. "I just miss her
so."
"I do too," Angel's voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "I got the clause
removed," he added after a moment.
"Oh," the witch looked at him understandingly. "Oh, Angel, I'm so sorry."
His response was surprisingly a smile, "You're the only person whose able to
understand that," he said. "When I told Gunn," he shrugged, "he just said
something like, hey man, now you can shag."
"He never saw you and Buffy together," she reminded him and he nodded. Clearing
her throat she continued, "To lose Buffy, Faith and Tim, Faith's husband,
altogether," she shook her head.
Faith had been Buffy's youngest daughter, born when her mother was 36. Named
after the other slayer who gave her life by protecting her mother, she had been
a beautiful young girl and a happily married wife with a daughter, who had
to be almost 18 by now.
Angel frowned and looked at the witch, "And the girl? I mean, Buffy's
grand-daughter, what happened to her?"
The witch eyed him for a long moment and then slowly said, "She is the reason
you were summoned, Angel. You are meant to take care of her."
End Chapter 1.
FIC: Memories of Sunnydale
Author: Jill
Disclaimer: I SO do not own them - sigh, so don't sue.
Distribution: Want it, take it, but tell me where it goes
Spoilers: the whole B/A-thing
Summary: after years of absence Angel's needed back in Sunnydale
Timeline: set into the future
Rating: mostly like the show, I think
Feedback: pretty please!!!
Dedication: To Claire, who did the beta-ing! Thanks, luv!!! The credits for the
title go to her!!!!
AN: For this story, Angel left Buffy after Grad 2, with all the tears and
heartbreak. BUT neither IWRY nor Sanctuary happened the way it did in the show.
Angel came back to Sunnydale in Pangs, and Buffy went to see him in IWRY, but he
didn't turn human. They just agreed to stay friends and accepted that their
relationship - although they loved each other - couldn't work. As a result Buffy
went to LA in Sanctuary, but they didn't fight. She just helped with Faith.
The PTB even expected him to stay near to the slayer to help her if needed.
(Remember what Whistler said in Becoming about Angel's destiny. I never get over
the fact that Joss just forgot about it with a snip of his finger - sigh). So he
went to Sunnydale from time to time to help out. Anything else is explained in
the story.
AN2: I'm not good at that future stuff. You know electronic things and all. So
although it's set in the future, the basic things I just take from the present.
MAJOR ANGST WARNING - CHARACTER DEATH
Chapter 1: The Return
Sunnydale 2060
It felt awkward, he had to admit. It had been so many years since he'd been
there. A half life ago actually. A human life that was. For a vampire like him
it wasn't that much or shouldn't be.
Sunnydale.
A name that still haunted his dreams, forever connected with a dream that
wasn't meant to be. Forever connected with the only woman he'd ever loved.
Walking down the streets in the moonlight the whole scenery had changed and was
yet so familiar, he knew every corner, every street and still discovered
something new. It warm and a soft breeze played in the air. He expected her to
come around the corner and smile at him, a little bit uncertain of herself but
determined in her duty. Her movements fluent and deadly, her strength
admirable.
Buffy.
She belonged to the dark streets as did he and yet he'd refused to believe this
a long time ago.
He'd left her so many years ago, sacrificed everything he ever wanted, ever
dreamed of for her, to give her the chance of as much normality as
possible. And had never left her completely. She'd never been out of his mind
or his protection. Silently he'd kept contact with Giles as long as Buffy had
been on active duty. Retired at the age of 40 she'd been the oldest slayer in
history and part of her success had been Angel's backup when needed.
He'd danced at her wedding with Riley when she was 25, he'd held her in his
arms when they were divorced five years later. She'd remarried at the age of
33. Brian had been a nice guy, but had been killed in Buffy's last year as a
slayer, leaving her with three children, two from her marriage with Riley, one
with Brian. Daniel, Moira and Faith, all of them beautiful, intelligent and
not his !.
After she'd retired from slaying the PTB had summoned Angel to Europe. His
strength was needed somewhere else. And inwardly he was glad. To be near her
and to not be allowed to be *near* her was a torture that outweighed everything
he'd ever experienced in his long un-life. To see her with other men, to see her
carrying other men's children. So he actually welcomed the change, he'd spent 40
years away from America, spending his time between England, Italy and France.
He'd even set foot into Romania for a short time. Enough time to remove the
clause from his curse, but too late for her.
And now he was back. Back because Buffy wanted it that way. Because she had
summoned him.
Suppressing the urge to shuffle his feet on the ground he looked at the wooden
door in front of him. Taking a deep unnecessary breath he reached out and
knocked. After a moment he heard a sound and then the door opened. She had
grown old, her body fragile, her hair white, her face wrinkled, the hands
calloused and freckled and now she smiled.
"Angel." The smile was genuine and surprised at the same time as if she
couldn't believe he'd come.
"Willow," the vampire smiled back. "It's ... well, I suppose it is good to see
you," he looked a bit sheepishly.
She gestured with her hand, "Don't fuss. I'm old and fragile, but I'm so glad
to see you. Come in." She moved aside to let him in and showed him into her
living-room. "Can I get you anything? I've made myself some tea, you want a
cup."
More because he felt obliged to he nodded. So she went into the kitchen and
returned with a mug in her hand only seconds later. For her eighty years
Willow was still very mobile. And her eyes still held that slightly innocent
expression. It was something that drew others towards her.
"Now," she said after a moment, "sit down." She handed him the steaming mug and
looked at him. "I wasn't sure you'd come."
"I," he cleared his throat and began again, "I wasn't sure either. I ... I'm
still not sure I can go through it."
"I know," she nodded and blinked to keep the welling tears from falling. "It's
hard for me too." When she saw him nod she continued, "They're all gone now.
It's only me who's left. It's getting lonely."
"Willow..."
"No," she raised a hand, "Don't pity me. It's what happens when you're getting
old. I should've gotten used to it, but somehow," she sighed. "I've been around
death a lot, that's for certain, but it seems you get never used to it.
Especially when it affects friends."
"No, you never get used to it," Angel affirmed. He knew what she was going
through. He'd lived with it since the moment the gypsies had restored his soul.
He'd seen people come and go, birth and death, the circle of life. Something
natural and normal. He knew it was him who was far from the norm, but it didn't
keep him from missing people he'd known, he'd grown fond of.
"Giles we expected to go before us," she began almost talking to herself. "He
was after all over 20 years our senior, but it hurt. Oh, it hurt. I was over 40
at that time, but I suddenly felt lost. I know he was mostly Buffy's mentor, but
we all, the whole gang didn't have the best of homes and we ... we just relied on him. Suddenly he was gone. I'm only glad Buffy was retired by then. You both
were just great when Brian was killed. Without you," she shook her head, "I don't know if she'd have made it through all this."
Then she suddenly looked him in the eye, "She loved Brian, you know. More than
she loved Riley," she had to laugh at that, "much more. But ... there was
always a part of her they couldn't reach. Her men, I mean. She had two lovers
after she was retired, did you know that?," then shaking her head at this stupid
question she said, "of course you'd know that."
"Yes, I did," he replied quietly.
"Yeah," she breathed and sipped at her coffee. "She made the best of her life.
Without you I mean."
"Willow, I..."
"No, I'm not blaming you or her. If someone's to blame it's Faith. It really
sucked regarding you two."
He had to smile at her teenage expression. It didn't fit the old, elegant
woman sitting opposite to him, and yet it fitted perfectly.
"When Xander died," she continued the subject she'd started earlier, "Well, it
was hard. Dying of cancer at the age of 50. It was too early," she sighed
again, "but then that's the way life goes, doesn't it. Then Anya shortly after
him." She suddenly frowned, "Did I ever tell you that we never found her body,
I still suspect that she contacted D'Hoffren and returned to her vengeance
business." She had to grin at that and Angel couldn't help but smile.
She shrugged, "If they'd had children then maybe I would think she'd really
died, but so..., never mind." Suddenly her eyes watered, "and then Oz," she
sniffed. "It's almost twenty years now, but still." Frowning she gazed at him, "I shouldn't complain. At least I had more than 40 wonderful years with him. That's more than most people get. When he died I shortly considered joining him, you know."
"Willow," Angel gave her a sympathetic look.
"Don't tell me you didn't think about suicide? I wouldn't believe it, because I
know you." Seeing his sheepish smile she nodded. "Exactly what I thought. But
we can't just go and take our lives, there's still too much to do." She sighed
again. "And then Cordelia."
At the mention of the brunette's name she saw grief flicker over Angel's
features. After he'd left America he'd kept the closest contact with her. She'd
died aged 70 together with her husband Wesley being attacked by a bunch of
demons. They weren't in the demon business anymore, they'd just been in the
wrong place at the wrong time. A dark alley after a visit to the opera. At least
it had been a quick and almost painless death with the demons snapping their
necks in an instant. Their two daughters were living in Australia now, both
happily married and having their own children there. Angel had never contacted
them, too frightened to endanger them. He didn't want any vampire or demon to get attracted to someone he would care about.
"But somehow," the witch said with a sigh, "I always thought Buffy would stay
with me. And now," again tears welled up in her eyes. They weren't the same
than before when she'd spoken of Oz, they were more intense, there was more grief behind them, because the loss was fresh. "But to lose both of them, actually all three because of a plane crash," now she couldn't stop the tears any more. They were streaking down her pale cheeks.
Angel's face wore a stoic expression, he'd already wept all his tears. They
weren't any left. All that the former red-head saw was the deep grief in his
dark eyes, he'd lost the only thing that really mattered to him. The only person
that ever touched his soul enough to lose it.
"I'm sorry," Willow said after a while and wiped her face. "I just miss her
so."
"I do too," Angel's voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "I got the clause
removed," he added after a moment.
"Oh," the witch looked at him understandingly. "Oh, Angel, I'm so sorry."
His response was surprisingly a smile, "You're the only person whose able to
understand that," he said. "When I told Gunn," he shrugged, "he just said
something like, hey man, now you can shag."
"He never saw you and Buffy together," she reminded him and he nodded. Clearing
her throat she continued, "To lose Buffy, Faith and Tim, Faith's husband,
altogether," she shook her head.
Faith had been Buffy's youngest daughter, born when her mother was 36. Named
after the other slayer who gave her life by protecting her mother, she had been
a beautiful young girl and a happily married wife with a daughter, who had
to be almost 18 by now.
Angel frowned and looked at the witch, "And the girl? I mean, Buffy's
grand-daughter, what happened to her?"
The witch eyed him for a long moment and then slowly said, "She is the reason
you were summoned, Angel. You are meant to take care of her."
End Chapter 1.