Disclaimer: This is my first story, so I hope you like

Disclaimer: This is my first story, so I hope you like. ^^ It's my practice on being descriptive. ^^ Oh…and this is for my friend Rena, I love you, girl! ^^ Well, I don't own Rena or Heero or whatever, god damnit! I don't own anything! I'm only writing this because it's one o'clock in the morning and I've had too much chocolate! And damn that rap music!

Never is a Promise

You'll never see - the courage I know

Its colors' richness won't appear within your view

I'll never glow - the way that you glow

Your presence dominates the judgements made on you

I walked into the apartment, to see him sitting in his large blue chair in the middle of the living room. He was reading another one of those books that take up hours of his time and - unfortunately - his attention. There was no use in making conversation with him, he wouldn't answer me except with a "yeah" or a "huh" really. I examined his deep blue sapphire eyes as they scanned again and again the book he was reading. His messy dark brown head of hair brushed his eyelashes, almost impatiently. Such a perfect guy, and almost invincible. Sometimes he makes me feel like I'll never be as good as he is, then again, sometimes I don't really care.

But as the scenery grows, I see in different lights

The shades and shadows undulate in my perception

My feelings swell and stretch, I see from greater heights

I understand what I am still too proud to mention - to you

But there are many times when I see that there are many things I find I do better than my perfect boyfriend. Cooking is one of them; I can actually make Macaroni and Cheese without burning the cheese and noodles at the same time. I'm also more emotional, but we won't get into that. Though I do have to remember at times, that I'm not at constant competition with him. I love him for who he is, not what he can do.

You'll say you understand, but you don't understand

You'll say you'd never give up seeing eye to eye

But never is a promise and you can't afford to lie

I also feel, sometimes, that he doesn't really understand what I'm trying to say or do. He gives me a blank stare, then acts like he knows. It's a frustrating thing to deal with, and I don't always think things will work out between us. However, somehow, they always do.

You'll never touch - these things that I hold

The skin of my emotions lies beneath my own

You'll never feel the heart of this soul

My fever burns my deeper than I've ever shown - to you

As much as he may try, he'll never know or feel in the same ways as I do. I'm buried within myself, and it may take a while for anyone to become close to me emotionally. It's like I have a wall of ice shielding me from my emotion. He doesn't seem to understand. Maybe it's that I've never understood myself, though.

You'll say, Don't fear your dreams, it's easier than it seems

You'll say you'd never let me fall from hopes so high

But never is a promise and you can't afford to lie

Even though he'll give me encouragement and high hopes, I'm afraid there may come a time when he only throws discouragement and failure at me. Don't get me wrong, I love him very much, it's just that I'm scared he might let go of me. But I trust him, and it's true, he can't afford to lie.

You'll never live the life that I live

I'll never live the life that wakes me in the night

You'll never hear the message I give

You say it looks as though I might give up this fight

 He sometimes says that we are one, but how could we be when we haven't lived each other's lives? I've never done all the things that he has, and he hasn't seen through my hardships. Even if we have stuff in common, we're very different people. And even if he never does understand, he'll never have to lie to me. Ever.

You'll say you understand, you'll never understand

I'll say I'll never wake up knowing how or why

I don't know what to believe in, you don't know who I am

You'll say I need appeasing when I start to cry

But never is a promise and I'll never need a lie

 

So…what'd you think? Sorry if I made you a bit out of character, Rena. ^^ I tried. Ooh! I see more chocolate! One sec. Okies then, If you like it, great! If you don't, that's your problem. But please don't flame me, okies??? ^^ Thankies! ^^