Obviously, Evangelion and all related characters are copyrights of Gainax, etc. etc. etc. This is not written for profit. Feel free to distrubute, but please do not remove this disclaimer. Thanks, Kerristallax (kerristallax@yahoo.com)
The Kaworu Chronicles
Part 1
Ikari Shinji, Ayanami Rei, and Nagisa Kaworu are standing before the fallen Unit 01. All of them are staring at the phone which has just been hung up in the Eva's exterior communications box.
'Misato-san is certainly in for a small shock,' thought Rei.
"Yes, she is, isn't she," replied Kaworu.
"How did you do that, Kaworu?" asked Rei calmly, even though the remark had startled her.
"When I said that you and I are the same, it was the truth. We are so close mentally that I can anticipate some of your thoughts. But we are unique, as well. I do not have the power of telepathy, or any such thing. But given time, you most likely can do the same for me," explained Kaworu.
Further conversation was prevented by the arrival of Misato and a rescue party of sorts. Upon the sight of three teenagers, not two, standing around Unit 01, Misato shouted, "What?! The Angel's NOT DEAD?!" The NERV security personnel reached for their weapons.
The sight of armed guards facing his friends brought Shinji back to the world of the living. "Katsuragi-sansa... please stop... I don't want anyone else to die," Shinji said desperately, a pleading look on his face. What surprised him was that he was being sincere.
"Shinji-kun! What madness is this?" Misato called. "You said the Angel had been stopped!"
"I have." Kaworu's statement brought everyone's attention to him. "I have no intention of merging with Adam or with Lilith, who resides within the door behind us," he said with a gesture to the re-sealed Heaven's Door.
"No! I don't believe you! You're... You're one of them!" Misato shouted. "One of those who took my father away from me; one of those who put me through hell in the Second Impact!" Misato was overcome by emotion; the memories were too much for her to withstand. She collapsed weakly to the floor.
Visions of floating in seas of blood tormented the mind of Katsuragi Misato. Her father was gone, the entire expedition had been annihilated. She was the only one. The only one in the world? Was everyone else dead? She floated on through what truly was hell for her.
Misato heard footsteps coming toward her. "Stay away from me! I don't want your excuses!" When she looked up, Shinji was standing above her. "Shinji-kun!" she said in shock. Rei and Kaworu were close behind him. The presence of the guards had, if anything, caused the three to stay closer together than before. "NERV security personnel are dismissed," Misato ordered. With that, the guards replaced their pistols and headed towards the elevator.
"Why, Shinji-kun? Why are you doing this to me?" Misato pleaded. Shinji was surprised by the sudden turn of events. He half-expected to be the one saying this.
"It is not my right to decide the fate of mankind," Kaworu resumed. "I would sacrifice myself so that you all, could live. Shinji and Rei have shown me that such measures are not necessary."
At length, Shinji answered, "No-one accomplishes anything by dying. Why is it our right to choose death for someone? Kaworu's has shown me this. He is no less human than I am."
Misato said nothing. Instead, she merely shrugged and moved listlessly towards the elevator she had come down on. "Well, come on. Let's see what the others have to say about this, Shinji..." Apparently, Misato was employing her usual method of solving problems: ignoring them or letting others solve them.
The ride up towards the main control room was long, and tense. Rei stood behind the others, studying Kaworu intently. He once turned and smiled at her, but other than that there was no real interaction. Shinji was still unsure of what to expect, and Misato was leaning against the wall hopelessly. The radio in the elevator interrupted the silence. "Katsuragi-sansa. Please explain what is going on." Ikari Gendou's voice was cold and unforgiving.
"I dismissed the guards when it became obvious they were not needed. Right now, Shinji, Rei, Kaworu, and myself are riding the elevator back to the main control area," was her reply.
Static was the only answer back from the radio. "Misato? What is going to happen to us?" Shinji asked timidly.
"I really cannot say, Shinji-kun," replied Misato, somewhat recovered. "After what your father has done to you -- no -- to us, I will do whatever I can to protect you. Your father... He would destroy us all to kill the Seventeenth Angel. I can only hope... Hope that this will not be our final hour."
This provoked Shinji, bringing back memories of Unit 03 and Touji. His father had nearly killed Touji by using the dummy-plug system. At least now that option was not open to the heartless Ikari Gendou. "He tried to kill my friends...! With my hands!" Shinji raged.
"Rei and I will protect you, Shinji-kun," said Kaworu. Rei nodded in agreement. "As you saved me, Rei. If violence is attempted towards us, we will protect you all."
"The AT Field?!" exclaimed Misato. "If there is a God, please let it not come to that. Is living worth so much as to be 'protected' by the Angels' AT Field?"
"Yes, Misato, it is," Shinji answered quietly.
"Speaking of which, you all have some explaining to do on exactly how we arrived in the present state----" The elevator ground to a halt, cutting off Misato. The door opened slowly, and Misato looked cautiously outside. No commandos, no automatic rifles, no-one...
Ikari Gendou sat at his cold, large desk somewhere in the Geofront. His plans were unraveling, it seemed. The old men of SEELE would finally retaliate. Somehow, they would find a way to punish him. Fuyutsuki asked him, "Well, Sir, what are you going to do now? Not only is the Seventeenth Angel still alive and well, he has befriended the Eva pilots. Currently, he is in the Central Dogma."
"Do, Fuyutsuki? Nothing... There is nothing that can be done." Gendou mused over his apparent defeat. He had lost Rei to that... Kaworu's influence. The Angel has shown, or is showing Rei what she is capable of doing. Rei will no longer be so pliable. Also, there is no easy way to get Eva Units 01 and 02 out of Terminal Dogma without them being piloted. Apparently, Unit 02 has suffered some damage during the battle.
"For now, I suppose we pretend the incident has not happened. SEELE can do nothing unless they admit that they intentionally sent us the Angel. They will continue as we are now until they find an excuse. Instruct all personnel that the Angel is to remain a secret," Commander Ikari Genou instructed Fuyutsuki. "This is the only way for NERV to remain. There really is no way to kill the Angel, now. When, or if opportunity arises, we may continue our hopes. Without the Lance..." Gendou shrugged. "Besides. So long as he remains, and remains in our hands, SEELE cannot continue their own schemes."
"Oh, and Fuyutsuki. Don't refer to Nagisa Kaworu as 'Angel' the way I have been."
"Understood, sir."
"Hello?" Misato called. "Anyone home?" Computers were running, the main hologram in the upper area of the room was operational, but they saw no-one. "Maya-chan! You are hiding around here somewhere!" The aforementioned Maya slowly rose from behind her computer terminal where she had been fearfully waiting.
"Katsuragi-sansa... Good... to see... you. Aaahhh! Angel! Angel!" Maya screamed. "The AT Field monitor shows nothing..."
"Maya!" Misato ran over to her to prevent anything drastic from being done. "Shinji, would you like to explain some things for us? Starting with WHY?"
"My being an Angel is not exhaustive of my being," Kaworu started again. "I am a human, much in the same way that Rei, Shinji, Misato, or yourself is a human." Rei noted that her name had been mentioned first... Why?
Shinji was feeling obligated to speak something on behalf of Kaworu, who seemed to have to say this often. "Kaworu-kun has taught me about the human soul and the human nature. What do you know about yourself?" Rhetoric. The teacher would be proud. "I have seen the depths of evil we are capable of, and the heights of goodness and generosity. Kaworu-kun has offered to sacrifice himself for us! But it is not necessary that we would... kill... him for our own selfish ends."
"So I place myself under the jurisdiction of Major Katsuragi. I will obey what she says. I will not destroy all of us by merging with Adam or Lilith. As I explained to my friends earlier," Kaworu said with a gesture to Rei, Shinji, and Misato, "it is not my place, nor is it my wish, to decide the fate of mankind."
Slowly, the other technicians rose to look at the being they had been told was an enemy. An enemy bent on their destruction at any cost. Understanding was going to take a very long time. They were prevented from any further questioning by the emergence of a certain Fuyutsuki. This certain Fuyutsuki told them, not in so many words, that there was "Nothing to see here." Misato and the three pilots were ushered out of the room into a smaller area. "Nagisa-san. You probably know what I am going to say. You will continue appearing at NERV as if nothing has happened. I know this sounds far-fetched, but it is the only way to keep SEELE off our backs for the moment. An apartment has been arranged for you. It is in the same general area as Ayanami's. She can show you the way. For now, collect your belongings and go with Major Katsuragi. Ayanami, you accompany them for the time being."
They agreed (what else could they do?) and went down to the NERV barracks where Kaworu had stayed earlier. His only belongings consisted of a few items of clothing, a sharp contrast to the bus-load of possessions Asuka brought with her. Thinking this reminded Shinji of his fallen comrade. "Let's visit Asuka before we leave," Shinji suggested.
"Yes... Unit 02's rightful pilot," Kaworu commented.
"Kaworu-kun! Her condition, and that of her Eva, is no fault of yours. Come with us... Perhaps you can see what it is to be one of us? To be normal?" Shinji replied hastily.
"Normal. What a strange word..." was his only response. Shinji's banter was delayed by this. "No, Shinji; do not feel as if you should apologize to me. You do not need to feel sorry for me. It will be some time before I decide what to do. For now, let us go see... Asuka."
Shinji, Rei, Kaworu, and Misato were going to NERV Hospital room 303, where Asuka was situated. Rei was deep in thought, pondering in her usual way over the happenings in her life. At the moment, she was grappling with her own nature. Events of late had thrown whatever order she had reasoned through into complete chaos. Evidently, much can change in less than a day. In less than a few hours, Rei had seen, and done, things she had never imagined. The encounter between Shinji and Kaworu... Did I do the right thing? Was there a right thing to be done in such a situation? If I had just allowed Kaworu to give up his life, would any good have been accomplished? Ikari-kun was going to kill him. Though he would regret it for the rest of his life, Ikari-kun would have killed him. It only took one gesture to sway him from that disastrous path, one compassionate action to remove hatred's taint from the young Ikari. Young?
Rei had unconsciously fallen behind Misato and Shinji. Kaworu, however, had slowed his pace to stay with her. Kaworu gave his 'Angel's Smile' to Rei, the same he had given Shinji when the two met for the first time. Who are you? I know what you are. Who are you? The smile brought a feeling of complete, absolute trust. At the same time, it answered nothing. Shinji and Misato stopped up ahead of them, waiting for the two to catch up. Shinji turned around at the exact moment to see Rei graced with Kaworu's smile. For some reason she could not quite explain, this caused her face to blush a brilliant shade of crimson. What was about Kaworu? Shinji witheld comment, even so. Kaworu took no notice of Shinji's observation and stared quizzically at Rei, unsure of why she was so embarrassed.
The cause of Shinji's sudden halt was their arrival at room 303. A nurse was walking out at the moment. "How's Asuka? inquired Shinji.
"Physically, she is fine," responded the nurse. "Asuka only needs to find the will to live within herself. She appears to be sleeping now. Please be quiet..." the nurse trailed off as she walked away. The group went inside the room. Asuka was lying on her back, clothed in a drab hospital gown. Her eyes were closed peacefully; her chest rose and fell in the rythm of slumber. Shinji was the first to enter, rushing over to the edge of her bed. Misato followed, and then Rei and Kaworu, respectively. The heavy door slammed shut behind Kaworu, causing Asuka to stir. Her eyes slowly opened, gradually taking in the prospect of visitors in the room. Immediately, her still-dim vision took in the familiar figure of Ikari Shinji. Katsuragi Misato registered after a moment, and then... Two pale, human-shaped smudges with red eyes and light-colored hair. Ayanami Rei was identified by her fine blue hair. The final visitor...
"Shinji-kun... Who is here...?" Asuka asked. Her voice was weak, a poor reflection of the formerly vibrant youth. Shinji hesitated to answer, knowing that a full explanation was more than Asuka could stand.
"A friend, Asuka," he answered at length. Kaworu nodded, a slight smile on his face.
"Shinji-baka... You aren't... telling me something..." Her eyes narrowed at him. "...Why...? I have all the time... in the world."
"When you get better, Asuka-kun," Shinji responded. Asuka sat up to prove that she was indeed better.
"Don't deceive me, Ikari." Asuka's voice seemed to be gaining in strength as she became angrier. The final visitor was about Shinji's age, although he was a bit taller. He had silvery-gray hair, and the same red eyes and pale complection of Rei. The two could be related. How? "Rei's long-lost brother over there doesn't seem like a very trustworthy individual."
"Asuka... I would trust my life with Kaworu-kun," Shinji remarked. "In fact, I already do... I still don't know what my father will do to me."
"Do to you? What makes you think your father is going to do anything? Aren't you more or less out of his reach?" Asuka replied skeptically. Kaworu took a step forward.
"Asuka. Shinji has told me about you. I am Nagisa Kaworu, the Fifth Child." Kaworu shook Asuka's hand in the traditional Western greeting.
"Fifth Child? They gave up on me that quickly?!" Asuka bent down her head towards the bed she was still sitting in. It looked as if she was going to break her promise not to cry again... Kaworu continued:
"There is a small problem." Kaworu looked around to everyone in the room. Calmly, he said, "I am the Seventeenth Angel." This caused Asuka to burst out laughing.
"You? An Angel? Don't kid me. Fifth Child maybe, but never an Angel." Asuka laid back down, laughing still. "Angel..." she said between fits of hysteria. "Shinji-kun, you certainly know how to make me forget my troubles." Kaworu and Rei quietly walked outside, careful to gently close the door this time.
"Asuka. He wasn't joking, you know..." Shinji attempted to get through to her. Asuka paled slightly. That freak really is an Angel?! "You missed the previous explanations... Even after admitting this to the entire NERV staff in the main control area, he surrendered himself. He gave himself up to Misato-san, swearing to obey her. I do not doubt that he is being truthful."
"You still have a lot of explaining to do, Shinji-kun," Asuka notified him. "Why do you trust him? Why do you even want him to be alive?"
"Asuka... He's the only one... The only one who ever showed me what it meant to love."
"LOVE?! You and he..."
"No." Shinji was surprised to hear the confidence in his own voice. "Not in a physical way. And you always chided me about being a pervert." He gave her a minor glare. "Although there was no chance of stopping him if he had truly wanted to destroy us, he placed our lives over his own. He... volunteered... his life in place of ours. It was... Ayanami who prevented me from killing him. I would have... I'm such a coward..."
"Don't start apologizing, Shinji-kun!" Asuka interrupted forcefully. "You can tell me the rest later. For now, stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you don't, you're going to owe me an apology!"
"Anyway... Why don't you clean up my room so I can get out of this dump? I could probably convince a doctor to get me out of here after you came in to cheer me up," Asuka said pleasantly.
"Of course, Asuka... You're always welcome in my home, err... apartment," Misato said, a bit unsure of Asuka's mental condition. Shinji, however, was relieved to see Asuka in some state of wellness again.
"I'll show the Angel who's the best pilot of Unit 02," Asuka pronounced before Misato and Shinji left. "Call a doctor in here, would you? I want out as soon as possible." Asuka had made her decision: not to give up; not to let life defeat her.
"Yes," Shinji stammered, doubly relieved to know that Asuka had taken Kaworu's announcement seriously. "I'm glad you understand now, Asuka-kun. I was worried when you left... I thought we wouldn't see you again. Good-bye, Asuka. I look forward to your return. If you need anything, anything at all, please call me."
Asuka gotup and walked over to where her duffel bag sat in a corner of the room. Only when she felt the cold draft of the room on her backside did she remember that hospital gowns are open on the rear. "EEETTCCCHIIIII!" she screamed at Shinji before turning around to face him again, her face's color imitating her hair. Shinji made a hasty retreat out the door.
"Who would have imagined..." Misato said after Shinji slammed the door shut behind him. "That the great Sorhyu Asuka Langley could be revived so quickly..." She walked with Shinji, Rei, and Kaworu back towards the elevator leading to the way out of the Geofront. Upon reaching ground level, they all headed to Misato's repeatedly battered, but temporarily in good condition, automobile. Shinji climbed in the front passenger's seat on the left; Rei and Kaworu were left the back seats. Possibly due to the incredible stress of the day, and possibly because Misato had not quite come to grips with having an Angel in the back seat, Misato's driving was remarkably sane. Kaworu and Rei were deposited in the general area of Rei's apartment. Before she drove off, Misato handed them a key with a card attached showing Kaworu's apartment number. "Kaworu... I don't know why you would, but if you activate your AT Field, it will not go unnoticed," she reminded him.
"I understand, Katsuragi-sansa," he responded.
"Call me 'Misato'," she yelled as she drove away.
Kaworu shrugged, picked up his new bag with NERV's ever-present fig leaf and creed, and proceeded to walk to his newly designated 'home'. Rei accompanied him, silent as was customary. However, silence was merely the path of least resistance at this time. Rei was unsure if she had ever had so many questions to ask. This was very unusual for her: being in a situation which she could not reason out on her own.
The sun was beginning to set, staining the sky a brilliant shade of orange-red. The shadows were lengthening over Tokyo-3, making the construction equipment appear as gaunt, twisted, black skeletons. Kaworu reached his door and inserted the key. He walked into the near-blackness without hesitation, while Rei remained at the door.
"Nagisa-kun?" Rei asked timidly.
"Call me 'Kaworu'," he replied with a smile, recalling how Shinji had addressed him at first.
"...Kaworu-kun... May I come in?" Rei ventured.
"Of course, Rei," Kaworu responded.
Rei stepped into the still-dark room. Cautiously, she flipped on the light switch neglected by Kaworu. Surprising to her, the room was then lit... and not by a naked bulb hanging from the ceiling. A plain, but functional, white lamp hanging in the center of the room provided illumination. Even more amazing, the lamp was not alone. There was at least another one in an area which could be termed a kitchen, if one was feeling generous. Another source of light came from a small corridor, which presumably lead to a small bathroom. The sharp contrast, even of these small measures, to her own living conditions rankled in Rei. Do they really care so little about me as to put me in the absolute lowest quality of housing? We are less than a block from my own quarters...
"What did you wish to discuss, Rei?" Kaworu asked after walking around and making a preliminary inspection.
After a long pause, Rei began. "Kaworu... How are we the same?" She left the greater questions unsaid. What am I? Who am I?
"We are alone, Rei. You know this, correct? We have always been alone. Today has made me realize that the humans, even separated as ... we are... They are not so alone as we. We rely only on ourselves. Though God may be in his heaven, and all may be right with the world... We are still alone," Kaworu commented, a sad smile playing over his face. He seemed to have only recently adjusted to calling humanity 'we'.
"I... Never thought of it that way..." Rei said with some difficulty.
"How are we the same, Rei? You see yourself when you look at me, don't you... Some day, we will know. The AT Field is all that separates us," Kaworu's voice was nearly a whisper. Rei picked up all his words, even if the message became increasingly cryptic as he went on.
At this time of the evening, the incessant clanging was gone. As the sun descended further, a feeling of quiet calm pervaded the area. Rei stood still, staring towards Kaworu but not really seeing him. She was lost in thought.
"Rei..." Kaworu said after a short time.
"...Yes?" she responded, surprised at the sudden addition of sound to the world.
"Even SEELE doesn't know anything about you, other than the obvious... Pilot of the late Unit 00; fourteen years old... That is basically all they know."
"That is the second Rei. I am the third..." she replied quietly.
"You are Ayanami Rei. You are the only one," Kaworu assured her. Rei was uncertain of this. "You are not expendable, no matter what they have made you think, Ayanami Rei..."
"...Thank you... Kaworu-kun," Rei said, almost unconsciously. Kaworu smiled. Those were rare words to hear from her; the same as his were rare words for her to hear. No-one tells me, a clone, that I am valuable, unique, and most of all indisposable. After a moment, Rei turned and slowly walked towards the door. It was as if she had to force herself to leave. Pivoting before exiting the room, she gave Kaworu a small smile. Her red eyes were two glowing spheres against the near darkness of Tokyo-3. "Good-bye, Kaworu-kun. This is yours..." she murmured on her way out. Kaworu walked over to pick up a cellular phone from her hands. Rei walked silently back to her own apartment.
Earlier, Misato and Shinji were arriving at their apartment. Shinji had not seen it in a while, and was greeted by the sight of beer cans strewn about, Pen-Pen ambling through the room, and in general, total chaos. He prepared to mumble an apology for going off without notifying Misato. Misato, however, sensed this and cut him off before he could begin. "Shinji-kun... We all make our decisions, and we will live with them. You don't need to apologize. In fact, it is I who should apologize for being the cause of this mess."
"M-Misato-san! I was still wrong to leave..." Shinji stammered.
"Always willing to take the blame, Shinji-kun?" Misato countered.
"I-I'm sorry!" Shinji blurted out. At this, Misato laughed slightly. Shinji responded by blushing furiously.
"Well, let's see about cleaning this up," Misato said, returning to her original plans. The two went about wordlessly, the only sound other than the ringing when the aluminum cans were thrown into bags being Shinji humming a familiar tone to himself. "An Ode to Joy". Time passed quickly, leaving the sky dark before they were finished. At this time, Misato decided that it would be best to check in on Kaworu. She dialed the number on her single operational phone to the new cellular. It rang several times before it was answered.
"Hello?" The voice was deep, compared to the average Japanese teenager's.
"Kaworu... It's Misato..." She was completely uncertain of just what to say, not having much experience talking over the phone with an Angel.
"Good evening, Misato-san. I was wondering if you were going to check in on me. If you'd like, I can call you every-so-often to check in. I understand that I create many new responsibilities for you. I would like to make this as easy for you and the others as possible," Kaworu responded. Something about him seemed to put her at ease.
"You're right, Kaworu-kun. Thanks for being cooperative. I do need to hear from you at least twice a day. I'm sorry if this becomes inconvenient, but... Well, Standard Operating Procedure, you know..." Misato told him. Obviously, no Standard Operating Procedure had been established on just what to do in the event of having a cooperative Angel. Just to be on the safe side, though, Misato had decided on this.
Kaworu did not seem bothered. "Of course, Misato-san. I understand."
"Thank you again, Kaworu-kun. Good-bye." Misato hung up the phone, a little surprised at how easy that had been. Shinji had taken the initiative and began to prepare some of the famous instant food they usually ate. The two were too deeply in thought to really taste it, anyway. Amazingly, Misato drank only a single beer through the entire meal, such that it was...
Shinji retired early that night, the day being too mentally stressful for him to remain active much longer. Misato was listening to the recorded message of Kaji's last words to her. She wondered why she tortured herself so, listening to this daily.
"...The words I could not say eight years ago..."
"Good-bye"
Why, Kaji? Why did you leave me here alone?
-End of Chapter 2-
The Kaworu Chronicles
Part 1
Ikari Shinji, Ayanami Rei, and Nagisa Kaworu are standing before the fallen Unit 01. All of them are staring at the phone which has just been hung up in the Eva's exterior communications box.
'Misato-san is certainly in for a small shock,' thought Rei.
"Yes, she is, isn't she," replied Kaworu.
"How did you do that, Kaworu?" asked Rei calmly, even though the remark had startled her.
"When I said that you and I are the same, it was the truth. We are so close mentally that I can anticipate some of your thoughts. But we are unique, as well. I do not have the power of telepathy, or any such thing. But given time, you most likely can do the same for me," explained Kaworu.
Further conversation was prevented by the arrival of Misato and a rescue party of sorts. Upon the sight of three teenagers, not two, standing around Unit 01, Misato shouted, "What?! The Angel's NOT DEAD?!" The NERV security personnel reached for their weapons.
The sight of armed guards facing his friends brought Shinji back to the world of the living. "Katsuragi-sansa... please stop... I don't want anyone else to die," Shinji said desperately, a pleading look on his face. What surprised him was that he was being sincere.
"Shinji-kun! What madness is this?" Misato called. "You said the Angel had been stopped!"
"I have." Kaworu's statement brought everyone's attention to him. "I have no intention of merging with Adam or with Lilith, who resides within the door behind us," he said with a gesture to the re-sealed Heaven's Door.
"No! I don't believe you! You're... You're one of them!" Misato shouted. "One of those who took my father away from me; one of those who put me through hell in the Second Impact!" Misato was overcome by emotion; the memories were too much for her to withstand. She collapsed weakly to the floor.
Visions of floating in seas of blood tormented the mind of Katsuragi Misato. Her father was gone, the entire expedition had been annihilated. She was the only one. The only one in the world? Was everyone else dead? She floated on through what truly was hell for her.
Misato heard footsteps coming toward her. "Stay away from me! I don't want your excuses!" When she looked up, Shinji was standing above her. "Shinji-kun!" she said in shock. Rei and Kaworu were close behind him. The presence of the guards had, if anything, caused the three to stay closer together than before. "NERV security personnel are dismissed," Misato ordered. With that, the guards replaced their pistols and headed towards the elevator.
"Why, Shinji-kun? Why are you doing this to me?" Misato pleaded. Shinji was surprised by the sudden turn of events. He half-expected to be the one saying this.
"It is not my right to decide the fate of mankind," Kaworu resumed. "I would sacrifice myself so that you all, could live. Shinji and Rei have shown me that such measures are not necessary."
At length, Shinji answered, "No-one accomplishes anything by dying. Why is it our right to choose death for someone? Kaworu's has shown me this. He is no less human than I am."
Misato said nothing. Instead, she merely shrugged and moved listlessly towards the elevator she had come down on. "Well, come on. Let's see what the others have to say about this, Shinji..." Apparently, Misato was employing her usual method of solving problems: ignoring them or letting others solve them.
The ride up towards the main control room was long, and tense. Rei stood behind the others, studying Kaworu intently. He once turned and smiled at her, but other than that there was no real interaction. Shinji was still unsure of what to expect, and Misato was leaning against the wall hopelessly. The radio in the elevator interrupted the silence. "Katsuragi-sansa. Please explain what is going on." Ikari Gendou's voice was cold and unforgiving.
"I dismissed the guards when it became obvious they were not needed. Right now, Shinji, Rei, Kaworu, and myself are riding the elevator back to the main control area," was her reply.
Static was the only answer back from the radio. "Misato? What is going to happen to us?" Shinji asked timidly.
"I really cannot say, Shinji-kun," replied Misato, somewhat recovered. "After what your father has done to you -- no -- to us, I will do whatever I can to protect you. Your father... He would destroy us all to kill the Seventeenth Angel. I can only hope... Hope that this will not be our final hour."
This provoked Shinji, bringing back memories of Unit 03 and Touji. His father had nearly killed Touji by using the dummy-plug system. At least now that option was not open to the heartless Ikari Gendou. "He tried to kill my friends...! With my hands!" Shinji raged.
"Rei and I will protect you, Shinji-kun," said Kaworu. Rei nodded in agreement. "As you saved me, Rei. If violence is attempted towards us, we will protect you all."
"The AT Field?!" exclaimed Misato. "If there is a God, please let it not come to that. Is living worth so much as to be 'protected' by the Angels' AT Field?"
"Yes, Misato, it is," Shinji answered quietly.
"Speaking of which, you all have some explaining to do on exactly how we arrived in the present state----" The elevator ground to a halt, cutting off Misato. The door opened slowly, and Misato looked cautiously outside. No commandos, no automatic rifles, no-one...
Ikari Gendou sat at his cold, large desk somewhere in the Geofront. His plans were unraveling, it seemed. The old men of SEELE would finally retaliate. Somehow, they would find a way to punish him. Fuyutsuki asked him, "Well, Sir, what are you going to do now? Not only is the Seventeenth Angel still alive and well, he has befriended the Eva pilots. Currently, he is in the Central Dogma."
"Do, Fuyutsuki? Nothing... There is nothing that can be done." Gendou mused over his apparent defeat. He had lost Rei to that... Kaworu's influence. The Angel has shown, or is showing Rei what she is capable of doing. Rei will no longer be so pliable. Also, there is no easy way to get Eva Units 01 and 02 out of Terminal Dogma without them being piloted. Apparently, Unit 02 has suffered some damage during the battle.
"For now, I suppose we pretend the incident has not happened. SEELE can do nothing unless they admit that they intentionally sent us the Angel. They will continue as we are now until they find an excuse. Instruct all personnel that the Angel is to remain a secret," Commander Ikari Genou instructed Fuyutsuki. "This is the only way for NERV to remain. There really is no way to kill the Angel, now. When, or if opportunity arises, we may continue our hopes. Without the Lance..." Gendou shrugged. "Besides. So long as he remains, and remains in our hands, SEELE cannot continue their own schemes."
"Oh, and Fuyutsuki. Don't refer to Nagisa Kaworu as 'Angel' the way I have been."
"Understood, sir."
"Hello?" Misato called. "Anyone home?" Computers were running, the main hologram in the upper area of the room was operational, but they saw no-one. "Maya-chan! You are hiding around here somewhere!" The aforementioned Maya slowly rose from behind her computer terminal where she had been fearfully waiting.
"Katsuragi-sansa... Good... to see... you. Aaahhh! Angel! Angel!" Maya screamed. "The AT Field monitor shows nothing..."
"Maya!" Misato ran over to her to prevent anything drastic from being done. "Shinji, would you like to explain some things for us? Starting with WHY?"
"My being an Angel is not exhaustive of my being," Kaworu started again. "I am a human, much in the same way that Rei, Shinji, Misato, or yourself is a human." Rei noted that her name had been mentioned first... Why?
Shinji was feeling obligated to speak something on behalf of Kaworu, who seemed to have to say this often. "Kaworu-kun has taught me about the human soul and the human nature. What do you know about yourself?" Rhetoric. The teacher would be proud. "I have seen the depths of evil we are capable of, and the heights of goodness and generosity. Kaworu-kun has offered to sacrifice himself for us! But it is not necessary that we would... kill... him for our own selfish ends."
"So I place myself under the jurisdiction of Major Katsuragi. I will obey what she says. I will not destroy all of us by merging with Adam or Lilith. As I explained to my friends earlier," Kaworu said with a gesture to Rei, Shinji, and Misato, "it is not my place, nor is it my wish, to decide the fate of mankind."
Slowly, the other technicians rose to look at the being they had been told was an enemy. An enemy bent on their destruction at any cost. Understanding was going to take a very long time. They were prevented from any further questioning by the emergence of a certain Fuyutsuki. This certain Fuyutsuki told them, not in so many words, that there was "Nothing to see here." Misato and the three pilots were ushered out of the room into a smaller area. "Nagisa-san. You probably know what I am going to say. You will continue appearing at NERV as if nothing has happened. I know this sounds far-fetched, but it is the only way to keep SEELE off our backs for the moment. An apartment has been arranged for you. It is in the same general area as Ayanami's. She can show you the way. For now, collect your belongings and go with Major Katsuragi. Ayanami, you accompany them for the time being."
They agreed (what else could they do?) and went down to the NERV barracks where Kaworu had stayed earlier. His only belongings consisted of a few items of clothing, a sharp contrast to the bus-load of possessions Asuka brought with her. Thinking this reminded Shinji of his fallen comrade. "Let's visit Asuka before we leave," Shinji suggested.
"Yes... Unit 02's rightful pilot," Kaworu commented.
"Kaworu-kun! Her condition, and that of her Eva, is no fault of yours. Come with us... Perhaps you can see what it is to be one of us? To be normal?" Shinji replied hastily.
"Normal. What a strange word..." was his only response. Shinji's banter was delayed by this. "No, Shinji; do not feel as if you should apologize to me. You do not need to feel sorry for me. It will be some time before I decide what to do. For now, let us go see... Asuka."
Shinji, Rei, Kaworu, and Misato were going to NERV Hospital room 303, where Asuka was situated. Rei was deep in thought, pondering in her usual way over the happenings in her life. At the moment, she was grappling with her own nature. Events of late had thrown whatever order she had reasoned through into complete chaos. Evidently, much can change in less than a day. In less than a few hours, Rei had seen, and done, things she had never imagined. The encounter between Shinji and Kaworu... Did I do the right thing? Was there a right thing to be done in such a situation? If I had just allowed Kaworu to give up his life, would any good have been accomplished? Ikari-kun was going to kill him. Though he would regret it for the rest of his life, Ikari-kun would have killed him. It only took one gesture to sway him from that disastrous path, one compassionate action to remove hatred's taint from the young Ikari. Young?
Rei had unconsciously fallen behind Misato and Shinji. Kaworu, however, had slowed his pace to stay with her. Kaworu gave his 'Angel's Smile' to Rei, the same he had given Shinji when the two met for the first time. Who are you? I know what you are. Who are you? The smile brought a feeling of complete, absolute trust. At the same time, it answered nothing. Shinji and Misato stopped up ahead of them, waiting for the two to catch up. Shinji turned around at the exact moment to see Rei graced with Kaworu's smile. For some reason she could not quite explain, this caused her face to blush a brilliant shade of crimson. What was about Kaworu? Shinji witheld comment, even so. Kaworu took no notice of Shinji's observation and stared quizzically at Rei, unsure of why she was so embarrassed.
The cause of Shinji's sudden halt was their arrival at room 303. A nurse was walking out at the moment. "How's Asuka? inquired Shinji.
"Physically, she is fine," responded the nurse. "Asuka only needs to find the will to live within herself. She appears to be sleeping now. Please be quiet..." the nurse trailed off as she walked away. The group went inside the room. Asuka was lying on her back, clothed in a drab hospital gown. Her eyes were closed peacefully; her chest rose and fell in the rythm of slumber. Shinji was the first to enter, rushing over to the edge of her bed. Misato followed, and then Rei and Kaworu, respectively. The heavy door slammed shut behind Kaworu, causing Asuka to stir. Her eyes slowly opened, gradually taking in the prospect of visitors in the room. Immediately, her still-dim vision took in the familiar figure of Ikari Shinji. Katsuragi Misato registered after a moment, and then... Two pale, human-shaped smudges with red eyes and light-colored hair. Ayanami Rei was identified by her fine blue hair. The final visitor...
"Shinji-kun... Who is here...?" Asuka asked. Her voice was weak, a poor reflection of the formerly vibrant youth. Shinji hesitated to answer, knowing that a full explanation was more than Asuka could stand.
"A friend, Asuka," he answered at length. Kaworu nodded, a slight smile on his face.
"Shinji-baka... You aren't... telling me something..." Her eyes narrowed at him. "...Why...? I have all the time... in the world."
"When you get better, Asuka-kun," Shinji responded. Asuka sat up to prove that she was indeed better.
"Don't deceive me, Ikari." Asuka's voice seemed to be gaining in strength as she became angrier. The final visitor was about Shinji's age, although he was a bit taller. He had silvery-gray hair, and the same red eyes and pale complection of Rei. The two could be related. How? "Rei's long-lost brother over there doesn't seem like a very trustworthy individual."
"Asuka... I would trust my life with Kaworu-kun," Shinji remarked. "In fact, I already do... I still don't know what my father will do to me."
"Do to you? What makes you think your father is going to do anything? Aren't you more or less out of his reach?" Asuka replied skeptically. Kaworu took a step forward.
"Asuka. Shinji has told me about you. I am Nagisa Kaworu, the Fifth Child." Kaworu shook Asuka's hand in the traditional Western greeting.
"Fifth Child? They gave up on me that quickly?!" Asuka bent down her head towards the bed she was still sitting in. It looked as if she was going to break her promise not to cry again... Kaworu continued:
"There is a small problem." Kaworu looked around to everyone in the room. Calmly, he said, "I am the Seventeenth Angel." This caused Asuka to burst out laughing.
"You? An Angel? Don't kid me. Fifth Child maybe, but never an Angel." Asuka laid back down, laughing still. "Angel..." she said between fits of hysteria. "Shinji-kun, you certainly know how to make me forget my troubles." Kaworu and Rei quietly walked outside, careful to gently close the door this time.
"Asuka. He wasn't joking, you know..." Shinji attempted to get through to her. Asuka paled slightly. That freak really is an Angel?! "You missed the previous explanations... Even after admitting this to the entire NERV staff in the main control area, he surrendered himself. He gave himself up to Misato-san, swearing to obey her. I do not doubt that he is being truthful."
"You still have a lot of explaining to do, Shinji-kun," Asuka notified him. "Why do you trust him? Why do you even want him to be alive?"
"Asuka... He's the only one... The only one who ever showed me what it meant to love."
"LOVE?! You and he..."
"No." Shinji was surprised to hear the confidence in his own voice. "Not in a physical way. And you always chided me about being a pervert." He gave her a minor glare. "Although there was no chance of stopping him if he had truly wanted to destroy us, he placed our lives over his own. He... volunteered... his life in place of ours. It was... Ayanami who prevented me from killing him. I would have... I'm such a coward..."
"Don't start apologizing, Shinji-kun!" Asuka interrupted forcefully. "You can tell me the rest later. For now, stop feeling sorry for yourself. If you don't, you're going to owe me an apology!"
"Anyway... Why don't you clean up my room so I can get out of this dump? I could probably convince a doctor to get me out of here after you came in to cheer me up," Asuka said pleasantly.
"Of course, Asuka... You're always welcome in my home, err... apartment," Misato said, a bit unsure of Asuka's mental condition. Shinji, however, was relieved to see Asuka in some state of wellness again.
"I'll show the Angel who's the best pilot of Unit 02," Asuka pronounced before Misato and Shinji left. "Call a doctor in here, would you? I want out as soon as possible." Asuka had made her decision: not to give up; not to let life defeat her.
"Yes," Shinji stammered, doubly relieved to know that Asuka had taken Kaworu's announcement seriously. "I'm glad you understand now, Asuka-kun. I was worried when you left... I thought we wouldn't see you again. Good-bye, Asuka. I look forward to your return. If you need anything, anything at all, please call me."
Asuka gotup and walked over to where her duffel bag sat in a corner of the room. Only when she felt the cold draft of the room on her backside did she remember that hospital gowns are open on the rear. "EEETTCCCHIIIII!" she screamed at Shinji before turning around to face him again, her face's color imitating her hair. Shinji made a hasty retreat out the door.
"Who would have imagined..." Misato said after Shinji slammed the door shut behind him. "That the great Sorhyu Asuka Langley could be revived so quickly..." She walked with Shinji, Rei, and Kaworu back towards the elevator leading to the way out of the Geofront. Upon reaching ground level, they all headed to Misato's repeatedly battered, but temporarily in good condition, automobile. Shinji climbed in the front passenger's seat on the left; Rei and Kaworu were left the back seats. Possibly due to the incredible stress of the day, and possibly because Misato had not quite come to grips with having an Angel in the back seat, Misato's driving was remarkably sane. Kaworu and Rei were deposited in the general area of Rei's apartment. Before she drove off, Misato handed them a key with a card attached showing Kaworu's apartment number. "Kaworu... I don't know why you would, but if you activate your AT Field, it will not go unnoticed," she reminded him.
"I understand, Katsuragi-sansa," he responded.
"Call me 'Misato'," she yelled as she drove away.
Kaworu shrugged, picked up his new bag with NERV's ever-present fig leaf and creed, and proceeded to walk to his newly designated 'home'. Rei accompanied him, silent as was customary. However, silence was merely the path of least resistance at this time. Rei was unsure if she had ever had so many questions to ask. This was very unusual for her: being in a situation which she could not reason out on her own.
The sun was beginning to set, staining the sky a brilliant shade of orange-red. The shadows were lengthening over Tokyo-3, making the construction equipment appear as gaunt, twisted, black skeletons. Kaworu reached his door and inserted the key. He walked into the near-blackness without hesitation, while Rei remained at the door.
"Nagisa-kun?" Rei asked timidly.
"Call me 'Kaworu'," he replied with a smile, recalling how Shinji had addressed him at first.
"...Kaworu-kun... May I come in?" Rei ventured.
"Of course, Rei," Kaworu responded.
Rei stepped into the still-dark room. Cautiously, she flipped on the light switch neglected by Kaworu. Surprising to her, the room was then lit... and not by a naked bulb hanging from the ceiling. A plain, but functional, white lamp hanging in the center of the room provided illumination. Even more amazing, the lamp was not alone. There was at least another one in an area which could be termed a kitchen, if one was feeling generous. Another source of light came from a small corridor, which presumably lead to a small bathroom. The sharp contrast, even of these small measures, to her own living conditions rankled in Rei. Do they really care so little about me as to put me in the absolute lowest quality of housing? We are less than a block from my own quarters...
"What did you wish to discuss, Rei?" Kaworu asked after walking around and making a preliminary inspection.
After a long pause, Rei began. "Kaworu... How are we the same?" She left the greater questions unsaid. What am I? Who am I?
"We are alone, Rei. You know this, correct? We have always been alone. Today has made me realize that the humans, even separated as ... we are... They are not so alone as we. We rely only on ourselves. Though God may be in his heaven, and all may be right with the world... We are still alone," Kaworu commented, a sad smile playing over his face. He seemed to have only recently adjusted to calling humanity 'we'.
"I... Never thought of it that way..." Rei said with some difficulty.
"How are we the same, Rei? You see yourself when you look at me, don't you... Some day, we will know. The AT Field is all that separates us," Kaworu's voice was nearly a whisper. Rei picked up all his words, even if the message became increasingly cryptic as he went on.
At this time of the evening, the incessant clanging was gone. As the sun descended further, a feeling of quiet calm pervaded the area. Rei stood still, staring towards Kaworu but not really seeing him. She was lost in thought.
"Rei..." Kaworu said after a short time.
"...Yes?" she responded, surprised at the sudden addition of sound to the world.
"Even SEELE doesn't know anything about you, other than the obvious... Pilot of the late Unit 00; fourteen years old... That is basically all they know."
"That is the second Rei. I am the third..." she replied quietly.
"You are Ayanami Rei. You are the only one," Kaworu assured her. Rei was uncertain of this. "You are not expendable, no matter what they have made you think, Ayanami Rei..."
"...Thank you... Kaworu-kun," Rei said, almost unconsciously. Kaworu smiled. Those were rare words to hear from her; the same as his were rare words for her to hear. No-one tells me, a clone, that I am valuable, unique, and most of all indisposable. After a moment, Rei turned and slowly walked towards the door. It was as if she had to force herself to leave. Pivoting before exiting the room, she gave Kaworu a small smile. Her red eyes were two glowing spheres against the near darkness of Tokyo-3. "Good-bye, Kaworu-kun. This is yours..." she murmured on her way out. Kaworu walked over to pick up a cellular phone from her hands. Rei walked silently back to her own apartment.
Earlier, Misato and Shinji were arriving at their apartment. Shinji had not seen it in a while, and was greeted by the sight of beer cans strewn about, Pen-Pen ambling through the room, and in general, total chaos. He prepared to mumble an apology for going off without notifying Misato. Misato, however, sensed this and cut him off before he could begin. "Shinji-kun... We all make our decisions, and we will live with them. You don't need to apologize. In fact, it is I who should apologize for being the cause of this mess."
"M-Misato-san! I was still wrong to leave..." Shinji stammered.
"Always willing to take the blame, Shinji-kun?" Misato countered.
"I-I'm sorry!" Shinji blurted out. At this, Misato laughed slightly. Shinji responded by blushing furiously.
"Well, let's see about cleaning this up," Misato said, returning to her original plans. The two went about wordlessly, the only sound other than the ringing when the aluminum cans were thrown into bags being Shinji humming a familiar tone to himself. "An Ode to Joy". Time passed quickly, leaving the sky dark before they were finished. At this time, Misato decided that it would be best to check in on Kaworu. She dialed the number on her single operational phone to the new cellular. It rang several times before it was answered.
"Hello?" The voice was deep, compared to the average Japanese teenager's.
"Kaworu... It's Misato..." She was completely uncertain of just what to say, not having much experience talking over the phone with an Angel.
"Good evening, Misato-san. I was wondering if you were going to check in on me. If you'd like, I can call you every-so-often to check in. I understand that I create many new responsibilities for you. I would like to make this as easy for you and the others as possible," Kaworu responded. Something about him seemed to put her at ease.
"You're right, Kaworu-kun. Thanks for being cooperative. I do need to hear from you at least twice a day. I'm sorry if this becomes inconvenient, but... Well, Standard Operating Procedure, you know..." Misato told him. Obviously, no Standard Operating Procedure had been established on just what to do in the event of having a cooperative Angel. Just to be on the safe side, though, Misato had decided on this.
Kaworu did not seem bothered. "Of course, Misato-san. I understand."
"Thank you again, Kaworu-kun. Good-bye." Misato hung up the phone, a little surprised at how easy that had been. Shinji had taken the initiative and began to prepare some of the famous instant food they usually ate. The two were too deeply in thought to really taste it, anyway. Amazingly, Misato drank only a single beer through the entire meal, such that it was...
Shinji retired early that night, the day being too mentally stressful for him to remain active much longer. Misato was listening to the recorded message of Kaji's last words to her. She wondered why she tortured herself so, listening to this daily.
"...The words I could not say eight years ago..."
"Good-bye"
Why, Kaji? Why did you leave me here alone?
-End of Chapter 2-