CLOSE TO THE TREE
After that cycle it was like I became a totally different person. Part of me was the old Enzo again, the kid I was before. Sometimes I liked being him and sometimes I didn't, but he was a big part of me again and I guess he always will be. But now I was also a totally new person, and that was because of the Academy. It was all real to me now – all the excitement and the fear and the worry and everything else… All the stuff I hadn't been letting myself feel because there was something much more important taking up my RAM.
For the first time I really understood just how big this was. I'd never, ever left Mainframe for even a cycle – and now I was going away for two hours. Two hours! That felt like forever. Even though I knew I'd be coming home once in a while it was still pretty intimidating.
It's weird – I actually felt worse in a way, because after Dot and I had our talk I really appreciated what I was leaving. Being in Mainframe seemed like a lot better proposition than it had a few cycles before. But it was OK, 'cause the more I thought about it the more I realized that even though it was gonna be hard to be away, as long as I knew I was coming home I could get through it.
There was another reason I wasn't too panicky about the whole thing, too. Even though I knew I'd been a pretty basic little kid when I started going into games with Bob, he never told me I was. While we were in games Bob always treated me like I belonged there, even when I was pretty sure I didn't. It took a while but I actually started to believe I did belong there – I started to believe I was good. And Bob pushed me along, little by little. He worked me a little harder and let me do more stuff on my own and before I knew it, I felt like a real cadet.
That was why, even though I was leaving in a few cycles and I was nervous, I wasn't totally scared of crashing out. It was like a gift Bob gave me - I knew how smart he was and how good he was, and if he believed I could do it who was I to argue? He gave me a lot of knowledge of strategy and how to outsmart Users and figure out games and all that stuff, too – but I could've learned that at the Academy. The other thing I could only get from him.
Those last few cycles I spent in Mainframe seemed to go by so fast. They were like a dream, in a way – I wanted to stop and really appreciate every nano but I'd get distracted and then when I got back to appreciating them another millisecond was gone, another second, then another cycle.
I could tell Dot was thinking a lot of the same thoughts and feeling a lot of the same feelings I was, even though we didn't talk about it. I found myself just staring at her sometimes, and sometimes I'd see her staring at me without saying anything. Then when I'd look over she'd just sort of smile and still not say anything.
A couple of nights before I was supposed to leave I was brushing my teeth in the bathroom and Dot came in. I could see her grinning at me in the mirror and I kind of grinned back around the toothbrush. Neither of us said anything, so I finished brushing my teeth and spit out the toothpaste and the water and I looked at her face in the mirror. "What're you thinking about?"
"Nothing much." She put her arms around my neck from behind, and I was just tall enough that if I stood on my tiptoes the top of my head fit right under her chin. "Just about how grown up you are, all of a sudden."
"I am?"
"Sure you are." She giggled. "I never got to watch you grow up the first time you did it, you know."
"That wasn't me. I didn't grow up – Matrix did."
"I know, silly." She stared at the mirror me for a nano. "But I still never got to see it. That's why every time I look at you and notice how big you've gotten, or how mature you act, it amazes me. You're turning into a new person every cycle, seems like."
"Maybe." Of course she'd said what I'd been thinking about a lot. Dot was like that.
"And now I'm going to miss some of those changes." She sighed. "It makes me sad to think about that…"
"Don't be sad." I wasn't sure I could handle Dot being sad right then. She had to be able to help me get through it, didn't she? "You said we'd see each other plenty, didn't you?"
"Sure we will. Anything less than all the time would never be enough for me, I guess." She kissed me on top of the head. "Look at you! This is what you wear to bed, now?"
"What about it?" I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt. To be honest I'd wanted to wear them to bed ever since I found out that's what Bob did, but Dot never let me. She'd been so busy with Mac that I'd just changed my wardrobe program a while before and never told her.
"So – you're too old to wear pajamas now?"
"No… I just-"
"Silly boy!" she laughed. "Well, that's all right. You're old enough to decide what kind of clothes you want to wear, I suppose. But I think they might have something to say about your wardrobe program at the Academy, though. Standard issue only, I bet."
"That's what Bob said."
"Hmmm." She kissed me again. "User – look at this hair!"
"What about it?" I'd just taken a shower a few micros before, and sometimes I forget to do anything with my hair when I get out of the shower and it kind of sticks out all over the place when it gets dry.
"It's a mess!" Dot laughed.
"I guess I forgot to comb it…"
"I guess you did!" She shook her head and picked my hairbrush up off the counter. "There's going to be girls at the Academy you know. Don't you want to look nice for them?"
"Girls?" I knew there's be girls at the Academy – I'm not basic! – but until that nano I'd kind of pushed it out of my processor. Girls! They'd care about what I looked like, wouldn't they?
"Yes – girls! Maybe you've heard of them." She started to slowly brush my hair down onto my head. "Aren't you excited about that?"
"It's no big deal." I lied. "I'm going to learn about the games, that's all."
Dot's face in the mirror kind of bit its lower lip for a nano. She giggled and kept brushing my hair, trying to get the tangles out. "Those girls aren't going to have a chance when they see you, little brother. They'll go offline over you."
"Dot, stop it!" No one could make me blush like Dot. I could see it in the mirror.
"I mean it, Enzo. You've become such a handsome young man. You're brave, you're funny – what's not to like?"
"Ow!"
"Sorry." She gently extricated the brush and kissed me on the head. "I think you've learned a little something from Bob besides games, too. You've picked up a little of that swagger of his…"
"Dot?"
"Enzo… Promise me you'll take care of yourself, all right? Keep your hair neat and brush your teeth after every meal and change your underwear every cycle and-"
"Dot!"
"I mean it, Enzo. I'm not going to be there to nag you and make sure you do all those things! I want to know you'll be all right."
I finally turned around. "I've been mostly doing them on my own since Mac came, Dot. You just haven't had the time… And I've been doing OK, haven't I?"
"Sure." She sighed and patted my cheek. "You know how I worry, that's all."
"I know." It was kinda nice, knowing that she still worried about stuff like that. "I'll do all that, Dot. I promise. You don't have to worry about that stuff."
"OK. I'll try!" She reached over and squeezed my nose. "But I can't make any promises! Now go to bed – you need your downtime. You may be a teenager but in this house you still do what I say, got it?"
"Got it." I giggled. She stared at me for a nano, smiled and turned away.
The next morning I got up and played with the baby for a few nanos before breakfast. He always seemed to have a lot of energy at that time of day for some reason, and seeing him all hyper and giggling always made me less tired, too. Which was good, 'cause I usually don't do too well in the mornings.
Dot was in the kitchen getting breakfast ready and I heard Bob whistling, so I wandered over to the bathroom where he was getting ready to shave. I hung around, for no special reason. Just wanting to be around him, I guess. I guess I didn't want to spend any of the next two cycles by myself.
Bob smiled and winked at me when he saw me standing in the doorway. "Morning, Tiger. What're you up to?"
"Not much. I was playing with Mac and now I'm waiting for breakfast. What about you?"
"Gonna shave, genius. Looks like we're not sending you to school a nano too soon!"
"Very funny!" He laughed and flicked a little dab of shaving cream at my face. "Hey!"
"Poor baby…" He grinned and turned back to the mirror.
"Will… Will you show me how to do that?"
"Do what?"
"You know… Shave." I hadn't planned on asking him but it just sort of came out.
Bob looked a little surprised. "Do you really think you need to shave yet, Tiger?"
I felt kind of silly. "No, I guess not. It's kinda dumb, isn't it?"
"Nah." He smiled and waved me over. "Can't learn too soon, that's what I say. You'll be at the Academy for quite a while – better I teach you now, just in case."
"Really? Cool! I guess I don't… I don't think I really want to have a beard or anything. You know – when I'm older."
He nodded. "Your call on that, Pal. You ready?"
"Sure."
"OK, then. Hold out your hand." I did, and he sprayed a little ball of shaving cream onto it. "Get a little of that between your fingers and spread it on your face. You don't want too much – just a thin layer. Don't forget that little spot under your nose – unless you want a moustache, that is?"
"No!" I giggled.
"No?" Bob winked and spread some shaving cream on his chin. "You'd think after saving the city and half the net I'd figure out a way not to have to do this every cycle… OK – got that shaving cream on there? Spread nice and thin?"
"Uh-huh." I couldn't get over how weird I looked in the mirror.
"Good boy." He opened the cabinet and rooted around for a nano, then came out with a razor. "Here you go."
"Thanks." I kind of stared at the razor for a nano, not really sure what to do with it.
"The key to shaving is to take it nice and slow, Enzo. I always feel like I'm in a hurry and I hate shaving anyway, but when I try to do it too fast I always end up cutting myself and that's no fun at all. Got that?"
"Right, nice and slow. Got it."
"Good." he chuckled. "There's no blade in there, so don't worry. You're just learning the motions this time. Now watch me. On the cheeks and under the nose, nice slow downward strokes, right? And when you do your chin, go the opposite direction. Against the grain. OK?"
"OK Bob, got it."
"Cool. Here we go. Just watch me and do what I do, OK?"
"OK!"
"OK!" Bob grinned at me and slowly started drawing the razor down his cheek. I watched him and tried to follow along as close as I could. It felt weird, kind of ticklish. But it was fun, too.
Every once in a while Bob would glance over to see how I was doing. After we'd both shaved for a few nanos he nodded and smiled. "So – how you feeling about the Academy, Kiddo – you ready?"
"Yeah. I mean - I guess so. I'm trying to remember everything you taught me."
"That shouldn't be too hard." He winked. "Don't over think stuff, Enzo. All those things I taught you are important, but you need to follow your instincts. You're a Guardian – you have to trust your feelings in a game sometimes, because they'll be all you have. Understand?"
"I think so." I nodded. "That's 'cause of the Guardian codes, right?"
"Missed a spot, there – right under your nose."
"Oops – sorry!"
"No problem! That's the toughest part of the face to get to. The Guardian codes are a part of it, Enzo. A big part. But they're nothing without your codes. You're the Guardian – the protocols just enhance what's already there. Every Guardian is different."
"I think I understand..."
"Don't worry – you'll do just fine. Let's see your face, Hotshot."
"Did I do it all right?"
"Not bad, not bad. Got some shaving cream on your ear, there – probably flicked it there with the razor. Gotta watch out for that. Pretty easy to cut your ear if you've got a blade in the razor."
"Really?"
He winked and tousled my hair. "All right, let's go ahead and do the chin now. That's where your beard is really thick so you have to be careful. Oh! I almost forgot the most important thing."
"What?"
"Never let your girlfriend use your razor."
"What?" I couldn't help but laugh.
"I mean it, Tiger. Hide it somewhere, do what you have to do. If you don't they'll use it to shave their legs and you'll look like Glitch took a rotor to your face. Do they care? No. Hey! What's so funny?"
"Nothing! I don't think I'm gonna have to worry about that for a while, anyways."
"Well… Don't say I didn't warn you." He turned his attention back to the mirror and lifted his razor, so I did the same. "There's a few things I want to tell you before you go, Enzo. Stuff I think you should know. So just listen up, OK?"
"Sure… What kind of stuff?"
He glanced down at me. "You know you're going to be the youngest cadet at the Academy, right?"
"Yeah." That thought was never too far from my processor.
"Well – don't let anyone push you around. There'll be some cadets that try to – I guarantee it. Most of the people you meet will be really nice, but there's always a few bullies. That's they way places like the Academy are – sometimes the smaller kids have to fight for respect."
"That's all right." I said softly. "I'm used to be being the smallest, Bob."
"I know you are, Tiger. And I'm not telling you to get into fights – that doesn't solve anything and you'll just get into trouble. But you have to know who you are the nano you walk through that door – you're Enzo Matrix. You're Dot Matrix' brother and you're the best that Mainframe has to offer. You're my student. My boy. You belong there – never forget that, Enzo. And let everybody know it from second one. Show them that you don't care how big they are, or where they come from. Show them that you can't be intimidated and they'll leave you alone. You understand?"
"I understand." I couldn't help but be a little scared – How could I be sure I could actually hold up when all this stuff started happening? I'd never even been to school with other little sprites before! But I knew I had to do it or Bob would be disappointed.
I think he must have seen in my face that I was kinda worried. He smiled and punched my shoulder. "Don't sweat it. You're gonna have a great time – you won't believe how much fun the Academy is once you get settled. You'll have to adjust at first – everybody does. But I'll only be a portal away. And I have absolutely no doubt about it – you'll kick ASCII."
"Really?"
"Big time!" I grinned and went to give him a quick hug. "Hey! You're getting shaving cream on my uniform!"
I pulled away quickly. "Sorry!"
"No prob." He chuckled and pulled me back. "Don't sweat it, Kiddo. This is what we've been working for these last three hours. It's gonna be alphanumeric."
"OK." I smiled. "Thanks."
"OK." We finished our hug and went back to shaving, although my processor wasn't in it anymore. "Couple more things. About my Dad."
I looked up. "Yeah?"
"He can be pretty tough. And he won't go easy on you 'cause we're family. But he's always fair, Enzo. He wants you to be the best Guardian you can be. Sometimes he doesn't realize that people can't do things exactly the right way – his way - every time. He expects a lot and he can be a real null when he doesn't get it. But he doesn't do it to be mean – he does it because he thinks you've got what it takes to be great. That's all. OK?"
"Sure." I remembered Laser pretty well from his visit. He'd actually been kinda nice to me, but I could see what Bob was talking about, too.
Bob smiled. "Just don't let him get to you. And don't expect him to show you he cares about you – that doesn't come easy for him. But he does, Enzo – I can promise you he does."
"I know." It wasn't easy for Bob to talk about Laser. I knew he wasn't the dad Bob wanted when he was a kid. But they were better now – almost like they were friends or something. And I knew that made Bob proud.
"OK then. We about done, here? You get that beard all shaved off?"
"Yeah." I giggled. "I guess so."
"Good boy. Now, just take a little of this after-shave stuff and pour it onto your hands. Not too much… And sort of pat it onto your face. Helps keep you from cutting yourself the next time. That's what they say, anyway – I have no idea if it works."
"Smells funny…"
"Yeah! I guess…"
"Feels funny too."
"It's good for your face." He chuckled. He dabbed his face off with a towel and passed it to me, and I did the same. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and we walked out into the hall and he sort of steered me towards his and Dot's bedroom. "Just a couple more things I want to cover, Enzo."
"In here?"
He looked around. Mac's crib was empty – he was in the kitchen with Dot. He shut the door and we sat on the bed. "Yeah. I kinda wanted it to be just you and me for this part."
"What part?" I was a little puzzled by this point.
"I just wanted to talk to you about some… Some stuff…"
"What kind of stuff?" Bob kind of looked down and shuffled his feet. "Bob?"
He was obviously uncomfortable. "You know. Just a nice talk. Man to man."
"Bob?"
He grinned sheepishly and started to blush. I don't think I'd seen him blush since I told him I knew Dot was gonna have a baby. "Enzo… I know I haven't been around for your whole life and everything. But I feel like… You know. Like I've been helping look after you a lot and all that. You know what I'm trying to say?"
He was really starting to give me the jaggies. I'd never seen him so nervous before. "You… Not exactly, I guess-"
"Just… We're a pretty good team, right? I mean – you and me are as much a family as anybody else, aren't we?"
"Yeah!" I nodded. "Of course we are!"
He smiled. "Good. Good… It's just… I think I should be the one to tell you about stuff. You know – the bauds and the binomes and all…"
I felt like I could almost have fallen off the bed. I don't know which one of us was blushing more, but I think Mouse's hair would've blended right into either of our faces. "Jeez! Bob…"
"Well… I think it's important, Enzo. You're going away from home and you'll be gone a long time. You're not a little kid anymore. There's some stuff you need to know."
"No – I don't! Just end file, OK?"
I know he was tempted. He looked as uncomfortable as I felt. "No, Tiger. Look, there's no reason to be embarrassed-"
"Puh-leeeze!"
"No!" He finally looked up at me. "Just… Just let me get this out, OK? My dad never had this talk with me before I left home and I can tell you, he would've saved me a lot of worry and confusion if he had. I don't want you to have to deal with all that stuff like I did. Just let me tell you what I think I need to tell you, and it'll all be over before we know it and we'll be out there eating French toast. OK?"
"Bob-"
"OK?"
I sighed and closed my eyes. "All right…"
"All right." I heard him take a deep breath. "Stop me if you have any questions, K?"
I nodded. "K."
I heard another deep breath, and felt him ruffle my hair. We talked for a while, and to be honest it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. I was totally embarrassed through the whole thing, I admit. I wished I was anywhere but there. Hex's lair would've sounded pretty good, if you'd offered. But we got through it, and I actually learned some stuff I never knew. And there was a lot of stuff I'd been too embarrassed to ask about that Bob answered without me even having to ask, which was awesome. I guess it was like getting an antiviral shot – it's really bad when it's happening but afterwards, you're glad you did. And when we were done we hugged again and went out into the kitchen and ate French toast.
Another thing I had to do before I left was have a talk with Frisket.
I know that sounds kinda silly. I mean, Frisket is a dog and everything and I know he doesn't really talk – but I think he understands almost everything I tell him. And I know he'd spent all that time with Matrix after he was all grown up so it wasn't anything new for him not to have the little kid me around. But for me it was a big deal – I'd never spent a cycle away from Frisket since the nano Dot brought him home. And I didn't want him to think I was just gonna forget about him.
The first thing I did was take him to Floating Point Park, 'cause he's always loved it there. There's all kinds of room to run around and stuff to chase and weird smells and he can get all muddy by the data stream. It's a pretty cool place.
After we'd run around the park for a while I was kinda tired, so I flopped down under a tree and just laid back and looked up at the sky. Frisket sniffed around for a while until he got bored and then he sat down next to me and out his chin on his paws. So I talked to him for a while and told him how much I'd miss him, and how Matrix would do a good job taking care of him like he did while I was gone, and how I'd be back a few times an hour and for the semester breaks and how the whole thing would only take a couple of hours and then I'd be home for real.
A couple of hours seemed like a long time to me, but I knew it was a lot longer for a dog. It was easy to forget all those hours he spent in the games, in game time – Frisket was a very old dog. Even regular time is like game time for them! I didn't like to think about that – it scared me a lot. But I also knew Frisket wasn't like other dogs – even though he was old he didn't seem old – he still ran around and was as strong as Matrix when he wanted to be. And he seemed to know stuff a dog shouldn't know. I don't think anybody really knew just what Frisket was except Old Man Pearson – and he wasn't telling. He's a secretive old guy – they even told me that while I was away they'd found out he was a codemaster. Mister Pearson – a codemaster! Is that basic or what?
After Old Man Pearson popped into my processor I decided to take Frisket over there, 'cause the data dump is another one of Frisket's favorite places. I like it too, to be honest – I kinda wanted to see it before I left. The data dump always brought good memories into my processor – air carts and cool junk and Frisket. What's not to like?
When we got to the yard I didn't announce myself or anything – just habit I guess. I didn't see Mister Pearson around anywhere so I slid the gate open and slipped inside, Frisket right behind me. As soon as we got inside Frisket started sniffing around like crazy and poking his face right into the piles of garbage. He was home.
I was just gonna sit there and watch him and not do anything, but I noticed an old zip drive in a big pile of junk so I went over and picked it up. It was pretty cool – I hadn't seen one since I was a little kid. There was other cool stuff in there, too – copy commands and cd-rom caddies and Thinkpads. Thinkpads! Before I knew it I was digging into the piles of junk and rooting around, just like Frisket.
I was elbow deep inside and old I-Mac when I heard a familiar voice. "Hey! Who's that rattlin' around in me yard?"
I couldn't help it – as soon as I heard him I jumped back from the stack of junk and fell on my bitmap. It wasn't 'cause he was a codemaster or anything – it was just that he was Mister Pearson. At the very least I was gonna get yelled at, and if he was in a real bad mood he'd get me in trouble with Dot. Then I remembered I was leaving in a cycle, and I wasn't 0.1 anymore. "It's me, Mister Pearson."
He appeared around the corner and Frisket started barking loudly. "Eh? Who is that, The Matrix lad? Flyin' toasters! Look what ye done to my yard!"
"I'm sorry! I'll clean it up-"
"Always were a troublemaker, Boy! Ye'll clean it up allright, and sure ye will! What're ye doin', tearing up me good scrap?"
I looked around. "I… I don't know. I was just looking at stuff…"
"Just looking at stuff, were ye? Just throwing stuff to the four winds looks like, Lad!"
"Sorry." I went down on my knees and started gathering the junk up, trying to remember where I'd found it. Just like that I was a little boy again.
"You'll never change, Boy." The old man scowled. "I think I'm rid of ye and there ye are, another one of ye back again to torment this tired old binome. Crikey…"
"I said I was sorry!"
"Never could see this fascination with me scrap, Lad." He shook his head and laughed. "So – Word is yer on to be leavin' Mainframe, then? That right?"
"Yes, Sir. I'm going to the Guardian Academy tomorrow."
"The Guardian Academy, is it? Is that old place up and online again? I never thought I'd see the day…"
"Yes, Sir."
Mister Pearson looked me up and down appraisingly. "Well – yer still on to bein' a bit of a scrawny lad, aren't ye? Still – older that that other one. The first boy. He was even scrawnier than ye when he went off to the games, he was. Never thought I'd be seein' him processin' again."
"I guess. He was 1.1, I think. I just turned 1.3."
"Did ye? Did ye now, Lad. Did ye…" He walked over and absently scratched Frisket behind the ears. There weren't many sprites Frisket would let get away with that, but he never gave Old Man Pearson any trouble. "Ye on to leavin' the dog here then, are ye?"
"Yeah. Matrix is gonna look after him till I get back. I guess he's really his dog anyway, so…"
"Pah! Dog should be with his boy, he should. That's his job then, ain't it? How long ye about bein' gone, Lad?"
"Two hours. That's what Bob says."
"Two hours! Is that all? I'll barely have time to sort out the mess around here!"
"I'll get it cleaned up-"
"Eh! Leave it Lad, just leave it." the old man sighed. "Get on home before that sister o' yer's misses ye. A real plum of a girl she is, that one…"
"Really?"
"Yeh, I'll clean in up, be off with ye! And be sure to do yer work and don't be slackin' yer little bitmap at that Academy! Yer sister'll be countin' on ye to do her proud, Boy. A real plum of a girl she is, that one."
I stood up and wiped my hands on my pants. I could never quite figure out Old Man Pearson – he was a strange old binome. "Thanks, Mister Pearson. Sorry about the mess."
"Not as sorry as ye will be if ye ever do it again, Boy! Now clear off and take this old fleabag with ye, hear me? And next time I won't be so kind and gentle with ye. Go!"
"OK, OK!" I tossed my surfboard out in front of me and took off. Frisket barked at Old Man Pearson and took off after me. I thought about the old man all the way home – what a weird old binome he was. I couldn't even imagine living alone, all by myself for all that time. Who knows how old he is! He could be older than Phong. And all he ever did was chase people off. What a weird guy.
When I got back to the diner Dot was sitting on the couch giving Mac his bottle. She took one look at me and her mouth dropped open. "Enzo! What in the world…"
"What?" My mind was still on Mister Pearson.
She set the baby down and stood up. "Look at you! Where in the world have you been?"
"Oh! I... I was over at the data dump I guess."
"You're filthy!"
I looked down. I had dirt and grease all over my hands, on my pants… Even on my shirt. I felt my stomach lurch like it had so many times since I was a little kid. "I'm sorry…"
"Looks like you were in the data dump to me! Look at that uniform! Oh, Enzo…"
I took a couple steps towards her. "I didn't mean to! I-"
"Enzo! Your boots! You're getting grease all over the floor…"
"Oops! Sorry. I was just helping Mister Pearson clean up and I guess I… I got a little messy. Sorry!"
"Oh, Enzo." She sighed and buried her face in her hands for a nano. I felt like I was about 0.2. "And just why did Mister Pearson need help to clean up?"
I looked down at my feet. "Me and Frisket were digging around and I guess we…"
"Just take your boots off. Don't take another step."
"Yes, Ma'am."
She started laughing, real softly at first but then louder. I heard Mac giggling, like he was imitating her. "What's so funny?"
Dot walked over to me, shaking her head. "Look at this – it's even on your face! Just go into the bathroom right now and get cleaned up, all right?
"OK, Sis. Sorry. What's so funny?"
She smiled and started to hug me, then her eyes kind of looked down at my uniform and she sighed and pulled back. "Nothing. You're really a stinker, you know that? Go ahead and get cleaned up." She looked around my face for a nano, then gingerly kissed me on the nose. "Go." She gave me a little push on my way.
"OK." I looked back at her, wondering what she was thinking about. She just smiled and picked up my boots and waved me away, and I went into the bathroom and took a shower.
I didn't sleep very well that night. All I could think about was that it was the last night I'd be spending in my docking bay for a long time. I know it doesn't sound so bad, but I'd never spent a night away from my bed – not since we'd moved into the diner after my folks deleted. The only nights I hadn't slept in my docking bay were the ones when I was a little kid and I'd begged Dot to let me stay in her room.
Dot asked me if I wanted everybody to come out and see me off when I left. I thought about it for a while, but I decided I couldn't handle it – if everyone was there, staring at me, I'd just think too much about them and how much I'd miss them and miss Mainframe and I just wouldn't be able to handle it. So I said just her would be better. At least that way if I lost it she and Bob would be the only ones to see.
We were gonna leave in the middle of the cycle, right after lunch. Bob was coming with me – he had to come with me, I guess, or I'd have no other way to get there. Bob never explained exactly how, but somehow because he had Glitch's codes he could open up a portal and travel through the net, and he could take other sprites with him, too. He tried to tell me how it worked but I didn't really get it. Maybe Mouse or Phong would've understood – I'm not sure anybody else would have.
That was a really exciting idea – traveling through the net with Bob when I'd never left Mainframe, even. Bob was gonna stay at the Academy for a couple cycles, too – they said it was so he could see his Dad and Mouse and Ray, but I knew it was really so he'd be with me and make sure I didn't get too scared or lonely at first. I guess it should've bothered me, but it didn't – I was just glad he was gonna be there. Those first few cycles seemed like they were gonna last an hour.
So that left me one last morning in Mainframe, to do whatever I wanted. I'd already kinda said my good-byes to Phong at the P.O. but there were two people I wanted to see before I left. Like I said, I figured I'd have a better chance of keeping it together if I saw them one at a time instead of everybody all together. So the first person I went to see was AndrAIa.
When Dot first told me how AndrAIa came to Mainframe, I thought she was kidding – telling me a bedtime story like when I was a kid. Who ever heard of a game sprite leaving a game? It was impossible! But I finally worked up the nerve to ask AndrAIa about it and she told me it was true. And one thing I learned pretty quick about AndrAIa was she never lied about anything – never. It was almost like she didn't know how to lie.
It sounds silly, but I was kinda scared of AndrAIa at first. Well, not scared exactly, but definitely really, really nervous. Every time she came near we I'd get all fidgety and sweaty and I couldn't even talk right. I didn't know why for a long time – it sure wasn't anything she said or did. She was really nice to me and smiled and laughed and she actually seemed interested in what I was doing, which the other grown-ups didn't a lot of the time. So I wasn't really sure why I got so off-line around her. Then when I got a little older I figured it out – it's because she's perfect.
No, I mean it – she is! She's the most beautiful sprite in the net, and I don't even have to see the rest of the net to know, it's so obvious. She's smart – she knows almost as much about games as Bob, and almost as much about geeky stuff as Mouse. She's funny. She's really nice – she never made fun of me or yelled at me, ever. She's fun, too – she still likes to run around and laugh and have fun, like a kid. And did I mention she's perfect?
After a while I got so I could hang around Andri and not act like a total null – not more than usual, anyway. We played jetball and went circuit racing and raced our jetboards and sat and drank energy shakes and talked, and every nano was incredible. Every time I was with AndrAIa I never wanted it to end, but it always did and she always went home with Matrix and I really hated him sometimes because of it. But he's been through a lot so I figure it all evens out, sooner or later.
I went to see AndrAIa at their apartment, Bob's old place. She was in the garage, working on Bob's car, which had crapped out yet again. He always tried to fix it himself and made it worse, then he asked her to fix what he'd done and then whatever had been the original problem in the first place. And she always did. Only half of her was visible; the other half was under the car, banging on something. "Hey!" I shouted.
She kept banging, so I shouted again, louder. Finally she stopped and shimmied out from under the car. When she saw me she smiled and wiped her face on her sleeve. "Hey! Why aren't you getting ready to leave?"
"I'm all packed and everything." I smiled, but seeing her face and knowing I wasn't gonna see it tomorrow made me feel like deleting myself.
She grabbed a soda out of the six-pack in the front seat and tossed it to me, then grabbed one for herself and sat on the trunk. I caught my soda and sat next to her. "Thanks."
"No prob. So – you excited?"
"Yeah. It's gonna be pretty cool."
"Yeah. If things had worked out differently maybe I'd have gone, you know? Matrix would have. I'm pretty sure I would've tried to go with him."
"I bet you would!"
"Yeah." Andri laughed and took a swig of soda. She winked at me. "User, I'm gonna miss you, Kid. Who am I gonna beat at jetball now? Matrix is no fun – he sulks when he loses."
"Yeah! Sorry." I just wanted to look at her more than anything else – I didn't have much to say. I usually don't around AndrAIa. Is it possible I'll ever meet anyone else like her? Sure doesn't seem likely.
"Well… That's OK." She ruffled my hair. "I think I can get by for a few minutes until semester break. Just make sure you keep in practice – and I expect to see some new strategies the next time we play. Learn a lot, OK?"
"Yeah."
She grinned. "Quiet today, aren't you?"
"Sorry. I guess I don't… I don't know what I want to say."
"Well, don't worry about it." Andri wrapped her arm around me and giggled. "And don't worry about anything else, either. You're gonna do great, and you'll be home before you know it. And when you come back we'll pick up like we never left off. OK?"
"OK." I whispered. I definitely did not want to lose it in front of her, and I could feel myself slipping dangerously close. Before I could stop myself I kissed her on the cheek real quick, jumped down to the floor and started for the stairs. "Bye, Andri. See you soon, OK?" It didn't come out very loud.
"You all right, Sparky?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. Matrix upstairs?"
"Yeah. But hold up." I heard her footsteps behind me and felt her hands on my shoulders, but she didn't turn me around to face her. She kissed me on the cheek, real softly. "Just take care of yourself, OK? Love you."
I nodded. "Thanks. You… too."
"OK. Matrix is upstairs. See you soon."
"Bye." I pretty much ran up the stairs and then I stopped at the top, waiting for my breath to come back. It took a lot longer than it should have from just running up a few stairs.
In spite of everything that was rattling around in my processor I couldn't help but laugh when I saw Matrix. He was sitting on the sofa in his boxer shorts, eating cereal out of the box. He looked a little surprised to see me for a nano. "Hey, Sprout."
"Don't call me that!" I sighed, more out of reflex than anything else.
"Sorry! Just once more for old times sake, I guess. C'mon – sit down."
"Thanks." I went over to the couch and sat next to him. I kind of smiled and so did he and neither one of us said anything for a millisecond or two.
"Wasn't sure I was gonna see you today, Kid."
"I wouldn't leave without saying good-bye!"
"Naw – I guess I knew that."
I took a deep breath and looked around the room. It'd changed a lot since Bob had moved out and they moved in – there was more furniture and stuff, but less garbage and clothes and stuff. It looked more like our place at the diner. I figure that was pretty much Andri's doing. "I told Dot I didn't want you guys to come over when I left. I'm sorry… I just didn't-"
"I know why you did it. It's OK."
"What?"
Matrix chuckled. "I know why, and it's no big deal. I understand, Kiddo. Don't even worry about it."
"Thanks." I sighed. We both sat in silence for a while. "I went over and saw your tree."
"What's that, now?"
I smiled up at him. "Y'know – your tree. My tree. The once you gave me when I turned 1.0."
"Yeah? How's it look?"
"Pretty good. It's grown a lot since then. I had to check just to be sure it was the same one! But it is…"
He smiled back at me. "Well – it's been a long time. Sometimes I look at you and think the same thing."
"Yeah?"
"Sure."
"I guess it was a pretty good present. Sorry if I didn't say anything when you gave it to me. I guess it took a while for me to figure it out."
"No problem." He squeezed my shoulder with one of his giant hands. "Place isn't gonna be the same without you, Kid."
"Thanks." I stared down at my feet. "I wish you could go with me." That was certainly true. I felt really bad that I got to go to the Academy and Matrix never did. It just didn't seem fair.
"Don't. You have to live your life your way, Enzo – not mine. I learned stuff my own way. I wouldn't trade a nano of it."
"But-"
"Hey – if I'd gone to the Academy Mainframe might have been destroyed, who knows? And AndrAIa and I might've never fallen in love. Things work out the way they work out – you just have to make the best of it. I know this is what's right for you."
"I hope so."
"Don't worry. Just do me one favor, OK?"
I frowned at him. "Sure. What?"
He smiled. "Just make sure they remember the name 'Enzo Matrix' for as long as there's an Academy. OK?" I stared back at him for a nano. All I could do was nod. "Good boy. Kick a little ASCII whole you're at it, too! But don't tell Dot I said that."
"OK!" I whispered. Every time I looked at Matrix I tried to picture myself in his face, but I could never do it. It was still hard for me to believe we were the same sprite, even after all this time. But still, there were moments when I felt so connected to him that it almost scared me.
"Alphanumeric. And try to have a little fun too, OK?"
"Yeah. I promise." He put me in a headlock, which was something he liked to do. I always pretended to try and break out of it, but I never really did. There was no point – I couldn't possibly budge him if I wanted, and besides, I didn't mind that much anyway. "You know what's basic?"
"What's that?"
"I always figured you'd be the one to leave. Y'know?"
"What do you mean?"
"It's just – when I'd get scared and think about us not being together. 'Cause you're the only one I can really talk to about a lot of stuff, so sometimes I'd think about what it'd be like not to be able to talk to you… I guess I always thought that if it happened, it'd be because you guys went away, not me."
"Why would you say that? You were always planning to go to the Academy, weren't you?"
"I guess so. But it always seemed like it was a million hours away. Right up until Bob told me I was ready."
"Hmmm." Matrix sighed. He gave my head one last squeeze and let me up. "And just were exactly did you think I was gonna go?"
"I dunno. Maybe off to fight Daemon or something…"
"Well… That could still happen-"
"No!" I almost shouted it. "Don't say that. Dot would be really bummed if you left. Then she'd be back to having no brothers again!"
"Don't worry so much." He scowled. "You're gonna be back soon enough, and maybe I won't have to go anywhere. Dot'll be just fine – you know how strong she is."
"I guess… But-"
"End file with that stuff, Kid. Just worry about taking care of business at the Academy, Got it? You've got a tough job ahead of you – a lot of hard work. Take care of business and I'll make sure things are OK here, all right?"
"Really?"
"Just trust me." Matrix smiled, which was still a pretty rare event. But maybe not as much as before.
"Matrix… Don't do anything dumb. If the war gets bad or something and you have to fight… Don't… Don't delete, OK? Just stay here and make sure Dot and Bob are OK."
"Enzo-"
"Please don't delete. Promise me."
"Enzo, I can't-"
"Please, Matrix! Just promise!"
He stared at me for a nano. "I promise, Kid. I promise I'll be here when you get back. We'll throw you a hell of a party too. OK?"
"Thanks." I sighed and closed my eyes. For some reason, the thought of everyone I loved being out of sight and beyond my control for two hours was totally scary. I knew, in my processor, that bad stuff could still happen even if I was there with them. It just didn't seem that way right at that nano…
I felt Matrix' hand on my shoulder. "You just… Just take care of yourself. Remember everything Bob told you. Even whatever I taught you, if you think of it. And don't take any recycle bin crap from anybody."
"I won't. I promise." I opened my eyes and tried to smile. "I guess I should probably go…"
"Yeah." Matrix stuck out his hand. "Good luck, Kid. I'll be with you every nano."
"Thanks, Big Guy." I took his hand and shook it, then I sort of fell against his chest. "Bye."
"So long, Little Brother." He pounded on my back a couple times. "Hey… Are you wearing cologne?"
I pulled away and look down at my feet. "No! I'm not…"
I heard Matrix chuckle. "I think you are!"
"No! It's… It's aftershave, I was just practicing, that's all."
"Oh! Well, that explains it."
I shook my head and felt my cheeks burning. "Whatever, OK? I… I gotta go. Bob's probably waiting."
"OK." He smiled wryly and shook his head. "Remember what I said, Enzo. When they tell stories at that Academy in twenty hours, I want stars in their eyes when they say our name. Right?"
"Right." I grinned. We looked at each other for a few more nanos. I couldn't think of anything else to say, and I guess he couldn't either. I bit my lip and waved, then took off down the stairs.
When I got down to the garage Andri was back underneath the car, working on something. Probably the interocitor - it's always the interocitor. I thought about talking to her again, but I wasn't sure I could take it. I just yelled out "Bye, Andri." And kept walking. Like it was no big file, I'd see her at the diner the next day. She said bye back at me, her voice kinda echoing from under the car.
And that was that.
I walked back over to Baudway and over to the Diner. It was pretty hard for me to look at the diner. Pretty much every good memory I have involves the diner in some way. I couldn't see the diner without thinking of Bob and Mac. And Dot – especially Dot. Her name's even on the roof, so I guess that's no shock.
Bob had all my stuff sitting out in the living room when I got back to the apartment, ready to go. Dot was cleaning food and stuff off Mac's face – I guess he'd just eaten his lunch. She smiled at me when I came into the room. "Hey, Sweetie. Everything OK?"
"Yeah. Yeah, thanks. I was just saying good-bye to Matrix and AndrAIa."
"You hungry?"
"Naw." My stomach was doing flip-flops – even the mention of food made me a little sick. "I don't think I could eat anything."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yeah." I sighed.
"All right." She smiled again, but she didn't look too happy. "I was just about to put Mac down for his nap. Bob should be home any nano and then I guess you…you…"
"Lemme see him, OK?"
"Sure." She set Mac down on the carpet and he started crawling straight towards me. He was getting really good at it – I guess he was gonna start walking soon. Talking, too. But I wouldn't be around to see it.
I squatted down and the baby came right up to me. "He said 'Guh!' which I think was his favorite word. He started banging his hand on my knee, with his palm open and his fingers spread real far apart.
"Ow! That hurts. Don't you know how strong you are?" He just stared up at me and giggled. I hoisted him under the arms and lifted him up. "How you doin', Sprout? Huh?" He loved it when I talked to him – it didn't even matter what I said.
I held him for a few nanos while he made all his weird little noises and squirmed around. "I'm gonna be gone for a little while, but I'll be back. Don't wreck any of my stuff, OK? And you can't have my circuit racing helmet, either."
"Oh, Enzo! Stop it."
"Sorry, Dot." I smiled at Mac for a few nanos and talked baby talk to him, which I've never been able to figure out why people do but I always do it anyways. Then I handed him to Dot and she took him into the bedroom for his nap. I waved at him over her shoulder, but he didn't wave back. I figured every time I saw him for the next two hours he'd have grown so much he'd be like a different baby. And then one time I'd look at him and he wouldn't even be a baby anymore…
Bob clapped me on the shoulder and scared the data out of me. I hadn't even heard him come in. "Hey, Tiger. When you get back?"
"A few nanos ago. Where were you?"
"I was just going over some stuff with Phong before we leave – emergency plans, all that - games and tears and stuff. For when I'm not here. You about ready to leave? I'd like to get to Gallifrey Seven before dinner."
"Yeah." I sighed. "I guess."
"Cool. Get everything you wanted to done?"
I looked around the diner. "I guess so, Bob. How long will the trip take?"
"Three or four seconds, maybe. Be over before you know it." He glanced over my shoulder. I turned and looked. Dot was standing in their bedroom doorway, staring at us. "I, uh, got a few things to pack before we go. Take your time, OK?" He winked at me and squeezed past Dot into the bedroom.
I went over and sat down on the couch, just staring straight ahead. I heard Dot's light footsteps as she walked over and sat next to me. After a couple of nanos she put her hand on mine. "I suppose it's about that time."
I just nodded. I didn't really trust myself to say anything. She squeezed my hand. "Will you do me a favor?" I looked up at her. "Stay strong for me the next few micros? I'm afraid I'm going to get pretty… Well, you know. I need you to be strong for me, OK?"
"I'll try." A whisper was the best I could do.
"Thanks." She half-smiled and squeezed my hand some more. "You know, I always expected this cycle to come. I knew Mainframe couldn't hold you – you're restless. You always were. Always wondering if something a little better might be out there and never wanting to miss it." She sighed. "I knew it was coming but it doesn't make it any easier."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be." Dot wrapped her arm around my shoulder and I leaned over against her. "I know in my heart this is right for you. And I know you'll come home, too. Just like your brother did. Only a lot sooner!"
"I guess." I just closed my eyes and tried to block out as much from my processor as I could. "I'll come home, Sis. I really will."
"I know." She chuckled and kissed me on the head. "User, there's so much I'm not going to be there for! Your voice breaking, your first girlfriend, your first date…"
I'd never even known any girls my own age – the whole concept of a date or a girlfriend sounded pretty bizarre to me. "That's not going to happen for a long time. Maybe ever."
"Oh, Enzo! You just don't know what it's going to be like, that's all. I missed all those moments with your brother – it's hard to accept that I'm going to miss them with you, too. Try not to grow up completely in the next two hours, OK?"
"Dot! Stop it…"
She laughed real softly. "In two hours you'll be a Guardian. My little brother! Won't that be amazing?"
"I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you, too. But as long as I know you're OK, I'll be OK. So promise me you'll take care of yourself."
"I promise."
"Be careful." She whispered. "Be careful in the games and listen to the teachers. Take care of yourself and make sure you eat properly and if you get sick, you go straight to the infirmary and let them look after you! Promise."
"Promise."
"OK." Dot sighed and gave me a little squeeze with her arm. "Mouse and Ray will be there most of the time… They'll be there to help if you need them. And you can always get in touch with me if you're… If you're lonely…"
I couldn't hold myself back anymore and I hugged her, although I still didn't say anything. She wrapped both her arms around me. "Enzo, all that stuff we talked about a few cycles ago… You know how I feel, don't you? You know you're still my angel and I want you here with me and I always will, no matter what-"
"I know. I know. I was just being dumb."
"No, you weren't dumb." She held me and didn't say anything for a few nanos. "That's all over, now. I'll be waiting when you come home, OK? You've got a long weekend in six minutes and we'll see you then. And the semester break isn't far past that – that's four whole minutes! You'll be having so much fun you won't even want to come home."
"Yeah." I finally opened my eyes and looked at her. She looked just the same to me as she always had, as long as I could remember. I could always see Dot's face - whenever I needed it I could launch it and open it in my processor. It was a part of me, so deep inside me that I couldn't even live if it wasn't there. "I love you so much…"
"You too, Sweetie." She smiled. "Remember – be strong for me, OK? I need you to get me through this."
"OK. I'll try…"
"Thanks." Dot whispered. "I have a little surprise for you, Angel."
"What?"
She smiled again, looking for the first time like she really meant it. "Bob was talking to his dad, and one thing led to another, and guess what?"
"What?"
"Bob and I are coming to the Academy and he's going to teach a course! Right after the semester break!"
"Dot! Really?"
"Really! Matrix can handle the games for a little while, and Phong and AndrAIa can run the P.O. just fine."
"Alphanumeric! What's he going to teach?"
She giggled and squeezed me. "Web survival skills. He's going to be teaching for a whole six minutes. We'll get an apartment at the Academy and bring Mac and you can stay with us. We'll be together for six whole minutes!"
"Dot, that's so awesome!" I laughed and kissed her on the cheek. "That's totally cool!"
"It's a while down the road… But we'll make it. We'll have the long weekends and the break. We'll be just fine."
"Yeah." There was a little bubble of euphoria in me for a nano. It started to fade away, but I could still feel it in there. I realized that the way to get through this was to think of it in little bits at a time, not all at once. Get through the first cycle, the first minute. Come home for a few cycles in six minutes, and then the semester break wouldn't be all that far off. Maybe I really could do it…
"I guess you should go. I know Bob's waiting."
"Yeah." I really didn't feel like letting go of Dot.
"Sweetie…" Dot brushed my hair out of my eyes and kissed me on the forehead. "I love you."
"I know."
"Have fun. Enjoy every nano of it. You're a really lucky boy, you know that? I'll see you in six minutes."
"OK" I rasped. "Six minutes." I finally let go of Dot and stood up, and she stood up next to me. I could feel stuff brimming all around my eyes, but as hard as it was for me to believe I hadn't cried. I kissed Dot and smiled. "Bob!"
He poked his head out of the bedroom after a nano. "All set?"
"Yeah." I picked up a couple of my portable storage units and my guitar and Bob grabbed the rest.
"You take care of him! Be careful traipsing around the net! You're sure this is a safe way to get there?"
"I promise." Bob sighed. "Let anything happen to my best student? I don't think so!" He winked at me and kissed Dot on the cheek. "See you in two or three cycles."
"All right." Dot sighed. "You stay longer if… If he needs you to. All right?"
"Of course. I'll stay as long as he needs me. But he'll be fine."
"OK. Did you give the baby a good-bye kiss?"
"Yes, Dear."
"Stop that!" Dot scowled. She looked down at me and sighed. She took my face in her hands and kissed me on the nose. "Have fun. Call if you need me. And never forget for one nano that we all love you and we'll be counting the seconds until you come home. OK?"
"OK. Thanks."
"Oh, Sweetie…" She gave me one last hard hug. "See you in six minutes."
"K." I was glad I was holding the storage units, because if I'd hugged her again it would have been hard to let go. Bob tousled my hair and headed for the door. I looked at Dot, tried my best to smile and followed him outside. "Where we going?"
"I don't want to open the portal indoors, just in case it's unstable. Can't be too careful, y'know? C'mon - let's just get out on Baudway and leave from there."
"OK." It was really happening! In a few nanos I'd be traveling through the net with Bob, headed for the Guardian Academy. It was like a dream – it just didn't feel like it could be my life. But it was. "Tell me how this works, again?"
He chuckled and shook his head. "I don't know how to explain it so you'll understand, Enzo. I just know how to do it. But it's pretty alphanumeric, believe me. You ready to go?"
I couldn't say anything for a few nanos. It sounded like an easy question, but it was one of those questions that got harder the more you thought about it. I heard my knees knocking together and took a deep breath.
I turned around for one last look at the diner. There were a few customers in the booths and at the counter, having their lunch just like it was any other cycle. Cecil was zooming around on his tracks, agitated about a messed-up order or something basic. And Dot was in the front window, looking out at us. I locked my eyes with hers, and she smiled at me.
I stared back at her for a nano, then I smiled, too. She tapped her heart, just below her icon. I tapped mine and turned around where Bob was staring back at me, not mad or impatient or anything – just looking calm and in control. He held out his hand and I grabbed it. He closed his eyes, like he was concentrating really hard, and a sliver of white light opened up in front of us. And then, before I really knew what happened, we were in the net….
You won't believe how cool the net is. You just won't believe it.