if im not in love - 7
I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through
Tonight
And if my heart is lying then
What should I believe in
Why do I go crazy
Every time I think about you,
baby
Why else do I want you like I
do
If I'm not in love with you
And if I don't need your touch
Why do I miss you so much
Tonight
If it's just infatuation then
Why is my heart aching
To hold you forever
Give a part of me I thought I'd
never
Give again to someone I could
lose
If I'm not in love with you
Why in every fantasy
Do I feel your arms embracing
me
Lovers lost in sweet desire
Why in dreams do I surrender
Lying with you baby
Someone help explain this feeling
Someone tell me
If I'm not in love with you
What is this I'm going through
Tonight
And if my heart is lying then
what should I believe in
Why do I go crazy
Every time I think about you
baby
Why else do I want you like I
do
If I'm not in love with you...
"Shut up." Matt snapped, sitting
down on the couch, his eyes lowered to his hands.
What had possesed him to bring up
Essa Rios like that? He knew that Essa was a emotional subject for Lita,
why had he gone that far? Was he purposely trying to be an asshole to Lita?
Matt knew why he was acting so rude, he was losing his girlfriend... wasn't
he justified to be an asshole? At least for a little while? Matt knew that
he was losing Lita, he could just feel it in his heart, Lita was falling
for Eddie Guerrero. He had seen Eddie glance at Lita when he thought no
one else was looking, Matt had seen how Lita had been more then willing
to let Eddie carry her backstage, and he had seen how Lita had jumped to
Eddie's defense.
It was so obvious what was going
on, it was completely obvious to everyone except Lita. The one person who
should know what was going on, was the only person who didn't know of Eddie's
feelings.
"What's going on Matt?" Jeff arched
his eyebrow up in questioning at his older brother.
Matt looked up at Jeff and groaned.
"I hate Eddie Guerrero."
"Why? He's never done anything bad
to us, well not as of late." Jeff said, trying to make Matt see that Eddie
wasn't that bad of a guy.
"Except charm my girlfriend. Lita,
she's falling in love with him, and there is nothing I can do about it."
Matt sighed.
Jeff stared at Matt sadly. Jeff had
also seen the interaction between Eddie and Lita, he had tried not to look
at it, but he knew it was there. Jeff had seen the sparks in full view
when Lita and Eddie had hosted Sunday Night Heat, he had seen the way they
finished each other's sentences and how they were laughing at each other's
jokes. Jeff hadn't told Matt, because he didn't want to upset his older
brother, but he could see that the beginning of the end was near.
----
Lita limped down the hall, her whole
body seething in anger. Why did Matt have to be such an ass back there?
What did he have against Eddie?
Eddie was sweet, funny... or was
that just her opinion of him? Why had she been so protective of Eddie in
the locker-room, why was she always defending Eddie?
Could she possible be falling in...
NO!
It couldn't be, could it?
----
Eddie walked down the hall, his mind
on Lita, he had seen the look Matt given him, was he that obvious? Eddie
shook his head and continued to walk down the hall.
"Eddie..."
Eddie looked up to find himself face
to face with Terri. "Uh, hi Terri."
Terri smiled sweetly at Eddie. "So
how have you've been Eddie?"
Eddie shrugged, looking around, trying
to see if anyone was lurking around. He had a feeling that Terri coming
up to him and talking to him, was just a diversion. "I've been good."
"Yeah, you got new friends and all."
Terri said, trying not to roll her eyes.
Eddie nodded. "Yeah Lita is great."
Eddie said without thinking.
Terri arched her eyebrows up. "You
really like her don't you?"
Before Eddie could reply, Dean came
from behind and threw Eddie into the wall forcefully. Eddie tried to push
himself up but he was kicked in the stomach by Dean; Dean then picked Eddie
up and threw him against the wall once more. Eddie slid down to the ground,
and groaned when Dean continued his attacks on him.
"I tried to tell you that Lita and
the Hardy Boyz were my enemies and not to get mixed up with them, but everywhere
I turn you are following that little slu--" Dean whispered.
Eddie lunged at Dean, throwing Dean
down to the ground before he could finish his sentence. "Don't you ever
call her that! Ever again!" Eddie screamed.
Dean threw Eddie off of him, Dean
pushed himself up, panting; The shock was painted all over Dean's face,
he didn't think Eddie would have the guts to attack him back, Dean threw
Terri a look, which she just shrugged to. Dean stood up straight, still
staring at Eddie who was trying to push himself up; Dean shook his head,
maybe he
had underestimated the strength
Eddie had... sure the guy was small, but the second Dean tried to call
Lita a name, Eddie had become into the attacker instead of the attacked.
"I underestimated you..." Dean started
to say but got cut off when he was picked up from the behind.
"Perry!" Terri screamed. "Put Dean
down!"
Dean looked behind him and saw that
he was being held in the air by Perry, Dean held on tight as Perry twirled
Dean around in the air. "Put me down Perry! NOW!"
"Oh come on Perry, put Dean down,
he's your friend, remember?" Terri ran over to Perry and started to tug
at his huge arms. "If you put Dean down, I'll buy you ice-cream."
Perry stopped twirling Dean around
in the air, and stared at Terri, as Dean still held on to Perry's neck.
"Will you get me rocky road ice-cream?"
Terri nodded. "Yes anything, just
put Dean down, please?" Terri stared at Perry, with a begging look in her
eyes.
Perry smiled quickly, dropping Dean
down to the ground. "Let's go."
Dean groaned once his body hit the
ground. "Damn it!" He yelled once he saw Eddie getting up and running off.
Perry looked over at Dean, and picked
him up again. "Come on Dean, we're getting ice cream."
Terri sighed leading Perry to her
car, and shot Dean a sympathetic look. "So sorry." She muttered.
Dean groaned, holding onto Perry.
"This is just peachy."
----
"Damn Dean..." Eddie muttered as
he changed into a different shirt slowly, trying not to hurt his ribs,
they already hurt like hell and he didn't want them to hurt anymore.
Eddie's whole body ached with pain,
but he had to smirk at the sight of Dean Malenko being twirled around in
circles in the air by PerrySaturn. The big guy sure knew when to come in
and act wacky, who knows how much more pain Eddie would been in if Perry
hadn't come in and picked up Dean.
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Eddie groaned, as he walked over
to his locker-room door. "Yeah?" Eddie shot the person at his door a look.
What in the world was Chris Jericho
doing here? Chris Jericho personally didn't like Eddie, they have had their
arguments and matches in the past, so what was he doing here?
"What are you doing here Jericho?"
Eddie asked, getting straight to the point. Eddie's whole body was thumping
with pain and he didn't have the time to have small talk with Jericho.
Jericho shook his head. "Hurt Lita
and you're a dead man."
Eddie grinned, even though it hurt
his face to do so. "What are you her father?"
Jericho rolled his eyes, shaking
his head. "No just a concerned friend who doesn't trust you. I'm not going
to come out and just say that you're scum, because I think you already
know that. Hey maybe you are changing, and if you are great... I congraluate
you, but if this is a part of some scheme you are cooking up, then leave
Lita out
of it. She's my friend and if she
gets hurts by you, I'll kill you." Jericho shot Eddie a look.
Eddie looked into the face of Chris
Jericho, not daring to laugh or grin or do something totally idiotic that
would cause him to get his ass kicked. Jericho was serious, and Eddie knew
when not to joke around; Eddie nodded slowly. "I'll make a mental note
of that."
Jericho shook his head. "Just be
warned Guerrero." Jericho turned on his heel and walked off.
Eddie walked back over to his coach
and fell down to it groaning, why was trying to change so hard? Why was
falling for one girl so damn hard? Why did he even try? Lita was hopelessly
in love with Matt Hardy, and Eddie was no competition. So why not just
give up? Go back to Dean, Dean would probably take him back, if he begged
long
enough... and then they would be
able to cheat to get Eddie his European belt back.
But the thought of having to betray
Lita didn't really sound appealing to him, because he knew that he REALLY
liked Lita, and he wasn't on top of his game anymore. Maybe before he had
been in control, he had a plan that could have easily worked, but somehow
he had let his emotions get the better of him, and he was no longer in
control... his heart was and his
heart wasn't going to let him betray Lita. Plus Eddie was friends with
Jeff, afterall Jeff had faked a seizure or whatever so Eddie could escape
the hospital, Jeff had beat up Christian and Edge after they gave him the
con-chair-to... Eddie didn't want to betray his friend.
Eddie felt like for once in his life,
he actually had a life... he had friends, the crowd was warming up to him,
and for once in his life, he had a heart.
He was no longer the weasel that
hung out with Dean Malenko, Perry Saturn, and Terri... at least in some
people's eyes. He had at least two friends that would stick up for him,
and who have on occasion... and in some weird way, he had Lita. Sure not
in the romantic type of way, but he had her as a friend. She had trusted
him enough
to let him carry her backstage...
that had to count for something right?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Eddie looked up and groaned, he pushed
himself up and walked over to the door, expecting to see Jericho, but then
Eddie froze when he saw that it was Lita at his door.
----
"Hi..." Lita said, smiling softly
at him from right outside of the entrance to his locker-room.
Eddie stared at Lita, unsure of what
to say, he was sure she would be arguing with Matt about him, and about
how he had ran to her aid and then carried her backstage, but again she
surprised him by showing up in front of his locker-room.
"Hi." Eddie said, smiling weakly.
Lita opened her mouth to say something,
but then she stopped once she saw the cuts and bruises on Eddie's face,
she brought her hand up to his face, examining his injuries. "You're hurt."
Lita hissed out.
Eddie had almost jumped back at Lita's
touch but didn't, he nodded silently, not fully trusting his vocal cords,
they would probably fail him if he tried to speak. Lita was touching him,
her hands were so warm and so gentle, and her touch seemed to reach into
the depths of his soul, with one touch and a look and Lita was getting
inside of him, where he let no one. She was reaching deep into his soul,
and as much as he wanted to deny Lita access to that part of him, he couldn't...
his body wouldn't let him pull away from Lita's touch, as if afraid if
he did so, he would never know the feeling of the warmth she was offering
him. She was making all his pain go away with just one gentle touch, and
a soft look... and he didn't want it to end.
"Who did this to you?" Lita asked,
still staring at Eddie's bruises.
"Dean." Eddie answered Lita's question;
He held still, not inviting her in, just holding still.
"That bastard, how dare he? He had
no right..." Lita said softly.
Lita let her eyes venture up Eddie's
face and she let her eyes lock onto Eddie's. His eyes looked so confused
but content right now, she had never seen that look on his face before,
she liked that look. He didn't look so scared and lonely anymore, in the
hospital he had looked so little and scared, she had wanted to reach out
and make all
of his pain go way so badly, but
she didn't know how. All she knew how was to hold his hand, and tell him
it would be okay, which it eventually would be. No one understood the reason
why Lita was so attached to Eddie, no one understood why she would spend
all of her free time with him... god how could they not? They didn't see
Eddie
like she did, no one saw the scared
and vulnerable Eddie she saw everyday, no one understood him like she did.
Eddie was just like everybody else, he felt pain... he bled... he cried...
and no one could see that about him... she did, she saw every part of Eddie
Guerrero, and if anybody else would see what she did, they would feel
the same way she did. Eddie had
changed, he really had... at the beginning she didn't know what to think
of him, what his motives were... but she could see it clear as day now...
Eddie Guerrero was a changed man...
And she was falling in love with
that man, despite what she kept telling herself.