Elizabeth frowned as she tapped her pencil on the edge of her sketchpad. She had an assignment she needed to get done and she was getting nowhere. Dozens of crumpled up sheets of paper were scattered around the studio where she'd thrown them and her mood was beginning to sour as well.
Heaving a frustrated sigh, Elizabeth pushed off of the couch, pacing back and forth. There wasn't much space for her to pace around in, especially since she'd moved some of her things in from Kelly's. Lucky had fought with her over it but eventually he stormed off, telling her that she could do whatever she wanted… as long as she realized that she was ruining their relationship.
Our relationship has been ruined since the fire. >
Elizabeth stopped short when that thought floated across her mind, falling back onto the couch. As much as it hurt to admit it… it was true.
Lucky and her were never the same after the fire.
They had tried to recreate a love that had died in the fire that night. And as much as she hated to admit it, it hadn't worked. They weren't the same people they had been. They weren't kids anymore. They had changed and with that, came a change to the love they'd thought would always last.
Elizabeth had held onto her love for Lucky because it was safe. It was what she knew. But she was different now, she had tasted independence and she wanted that back. She wanted to be the girl who could stand up to the entire town if need be again… And if she wanted to find that girl again… she needed to step away from her safety net.
A single tear trickled down her face, but it didn't stem from fear like her recent tears in the past few days had been about. It was a tear of lost love.
Of the end of love.
She needed to say the words. Out loud… If she didn't, they wouldn't be as real. You can think the words all you want, but until you say them, they don't mean much.
Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth looked around. This was HER studio. It was a symbol of the independence she had gain in that year Lucky was gone. She had fought her grandmother for it without Lucky, she had made it into a place of comfort for herself without Lucky, and it was hers and hers alone.
Her eyes landed on the display easel where the painting of The Wind stood, the display light shining down on it softly. Whispering, Elizabeth said the words she'd didn't know she'd been feeling for a long time.
"I am not in love with Lucky anymore."
"DAMNIT!"
Ducking, Jason cautiously stepped inside the door of the penthouse. The vase Sonny had thrown across the room lay in pieces on the floor near the door and Jason stepped over it as he walked in.
Sonny looked over at his friend, taking deep breaths to try to control his anger. "We need to do something about Zander Smith. He's going to make me have a heart attack. He slipped the guards again, did you hear? He slipped them AGAIN and almost got himself killed."
"What happened," Jason said, his voice and demeanor cool.
Sonny nearly growled with frustration. "He pulled the slip so that he could see Emily – or so he says – and he was almost hit by a car!"
Jason's eyebrows raised. "It wasn't Sorel?"
"NO! That's the thing. The kid almost got himself killed because he FORGOT to look both ways before crossing the street. I can't deal with this, Jason. I can't. This is my family and I need Zander Smith to be protected – even from himself – until this trial."
Jason nodded. "What do you have in mind?"
"Take him underground. You can't leave Port Charles, but just… take him underground. I need for you to just… just disappear with him until the trial."
Jason frowned slightly. "There are some things I have to-"
"Jason, please." Sonny looked him straight in the eye and Jason saw a vulnerability there. "I can't lose my family."
Taking a deep breath, Jason looked around at the penthouse, from the broken glass that Sonny had broken to Michael's toys by the fireplace. "I'll do it," he said softly. "But there's something I need you to do for me."
Sonny breathed a sigh of relief. "Anything. I'll do anything."
Jason looked down for a moment. "Look out for Elizabeth."
"Is she in danger?"
"She might be… I don't know. Someone's leaving her reminders of… of a bad night for her… I'll do some checking around while I'm in hiding with Zander, but… make sure she's safe Sonny."
Sonny grabbed Jason's hand, looking down at it for a second before pulling his friend into a hug, both men patting each other on the back. "You have my word."
He pulled back, looking Jason straight in the eye. "Elizabeth Webber will be protected, Jason… I promise you that. She'll be protected at all costs."
Elizabeth inhaled deeply as she walked down the docks on her way towards the studio. The sun was just beginning to set but it was still light enough for her to feel safe. She always felt safer when it was light out.
"Spring's coming soon," she mumbled to herself.
"You always loved the spring."
Spinning on her heel, Elizabeth watched as Lucky jogged down the stairs, his shoes soundly louder than usual on the wooden docks.
"Lucky," she said carefully. She needed to talk to him, tell him her feelings, but she had wanted to do it on her own time. She wanted to plan it and have the chat when she was comfortable, and she knew that if he broached her on what she was feeling tonight, she wouldn't be able to lie to him anymore. Her realization was so new to her… she had wanted more time to get used to the idea that her and Lucky were never going to be the same again.
It looked like she wouldn't have that luxury.
"Want to come to Kelly's with me?" Lucky asked, looking hopeful.
"I was just heading home," Elizabeth said slowly, motioning towards her studio building. Lucky winced at the idea of her studio being her home.
"Come on, Elizabeth. Emily's working… we could go visit her, hang out. Just like old times."
That did it. Those four words. Just like old times.
Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth looked around, willing herself to do this. "Lucky… we need to talk."
Lucky's face lit up. "So you'll come? You'll come back to Kelly's?" He pulled on her arm, urging her back towards the diner.
"Wait. Stop." Digging her heels into the docks, she pulled her arm out of his grasp and sat down on a bench, patting the seat next to her. "Come here, Lucky."
Lucky's eyebrows furrowed but he silently joined her. "What's going on."
Elizabeth looked up at him as she whispered. "I can't do this anymore."
"You can't do what?"
Looking out at the water, Elizabeth tried to piece together her thoughts. "You meant everything to me, you know that. Especially after the rape. I had nothing then, and you came and gave me the world. I didn't know what to do. I thought I was going to be damaged goods after that night… but you loved me. And you made me believe that everything would be ok. And I loved you with all my heart."
Lucky let out a shaky breath. "Why are you talking in the past tense?"
Elizabeth ignored what he said, instead choosing to look down at her hands. "It's strange how much things change. When I was younger, I despised Sarah so much. Saint Sarah… that was my sister. I could never compare to her. I did everything I could to antagonized her, but she was there for me after the rape, you know? That was a big change."
"Elizabeth…"
"And my Grams… she's changed. She's more understanding, more supportive. And you've changed. You went from wanting to be a musician to loving photography. I guess everyone changes…"
Lucky watched her babble in confusion. "Why are you talking about all of this?"
Elizabeth finally looked back at him. "Aren't you going to ask how I've changed?"
His jaw clenched but he remained silent.
"I… I realized that I can live on my own. That I can be my own person. I've changed because I know now that I'm strong enough to make it for me. I'm strong now. I don't need anyone else to hold me up… it's nice to have them, but if I needed to do it myself, I could. I wouldn't want to, that's just how I am… but I could."
Lucky's eyebrows furrowed. "I don't understand…"
"When I told you I wanted to move out of Kelly's, you jumped to the conclusion that I was breaking up with you."
Lucky started to get an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach. He chose to ignore it. "I know I didn't take you moving out well, but I can deal with it, Elizabeth. It will be hard, but I can do it… I love you that much."
That uncomfortable feeling was getting stronger and stronger and Lucky inhaled sharply. "You said you weren't breaking up with me, Elizabeth… Don't tell me that's changed as well."
Tears glittered in Elizabeth's eyes. "I'm sorry, Lucky."
Lucky's face crumpled. "Elizabeth," he whispered, his voice breaking. "You can't… we… we're forever, remember? You hold the key to my heart… and that's a permanent lock. Forever, Elizabeth. We're supposed to love each other forever."
"I will always love you, Lucky."
He took a deep, calming breath. "Then why were you saying-"
"But I'm not IN love with you anymore."
Lucky froze, slowly turning towards her, his eyes welling up with tears. "You don't mean that," he said, hurt filling his voice. "You… you don't mean it!"
Elizabeth's chin trembled but she forced herself to remain strong, no matter how much it hurt her to hurt him. "It's how I feel."
"You don't know how you feel! You're confused."
Elizabeth shook her head sadly. "For once Lucky… I'm not."
Lucky shook his head as he stood, backing away from her. "I can't believe you're doing this to me… You love me, Elizabeth. You can't be doing this."
"Lucky, I'm sorry!"
Still shaking his head, Lucky moved farther away from her. "You don't know what you're doing. You don't…"
Elizabeth watched as he walked away, wiping away tears as she remembered the hurt look on his face. "I'm sorry," she whispered to herself. Taking a deep breath, she pushed off the bench and made her way towards the studio.
Never once did she notice the man standing in the shadows, watching the events as they unfolded in front of him, a grin on his face.