Jack's appearance on "The Weakest Link"
By: BooBoo
Foreword: It's been a while but I'm coming off my writing vacation and this is my first HM fic since the trilogy. That was a pain to write. Note to writers "NEVER WRITE A TRILOGY!!!"
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Host: Welcome to the weakest link. Since I'm experiences severe hemorrhoids and I don't feel like putting up with you uneducated slobs we have 5 contestants . Lets meet them. Bill tell us what you do.
Bill: I design underwear for elderly people.
Host: I know they make me feel sexy
Bill: mmmmmmmm... I love it
Jack: I don't
Host: Shut up, how about you Elka
Elka: I'm-a Sveedish
Jack: No-a sheet
Host: Jack you are incompetent
Jack: Can Ex-lax cure that
Elka: that's-a constipated
Host: It is your turn Floppy, you brainless piece of poop
Floppy: As a wise man once said "Man who stand on toilet is high on pot"
Host: I will decide who is wise and by the meaning of what you just said you must be a stupid ass
Floppy: Spankx
Host: Jack
Jack: I'm a farmer
Host Ha... your a f***ing looser
Jack: That's not what my pitch fork thinks
Host: Let's forget that. Last, introduce yourself Ron
Ron: I'm unemployed and I sit on my ass all day and drink beer
Host: so your an average American
Host: Let's start. Bill, What word does "therapist" turn into
Bill: UUUMMM... The rapist
Host: correct. Elka, when was Jesus born
Elka: In a Sveeden
Host: no I asked when
Host: Floppy what are you
Floppy a wise man
Host: No a fagot hahaha. Jack, what is 3*7
Jack: 21, I ain't stupid
Host: even if you were right I'm always on my period and I hate you
Jack: thank you, Mrs. Superwhore
Host: Bill, (all of a sudden the lights went out and gunshots rang out)
(Every body in the studio exept Ron and the host were shot to death. The host had a pitch fork in her head with a note that said " I told you so you incredible bitch." Jack had disappeared and Ron was sittind there sleeping with a brew in his left hand)
ANOTHER UNSOLVED MYSTERY
GOIN' DOWN IN HISTORY
By: BooBoo
Foreword: It's been a while but I'm coming off my writing vacation and this is my first HM fic since the trilogy. That was a pain to write. Note to writers "NEVER WRITE A TRILOGY!!!"
-----------------------------------------------------
Host: Welcome to the weakest link. Since I'm experiences severe hemorrhoids and I don't feel like putting up with you uneducated slobs we have 5 contestants . Lets meet them. Bill tell us what you do.
Bill: I design underwear for elderly people.
Host: I know they make me feel sexy
Bill: mmmmmmmm... I love it
Jack: I don't
Host: Shut up, how about you Elka
Elka: I'm-a Sveedish
Jack: No-a sheet
Host: Jack you are incompetent
Jack: Can Ex-lax cure that
Elka: that's-a constipated
Host: It is your turn Floppy, you brainless piece of poop
Floppy: As a wise man once said "Man who stand on toilet is high on pot"
Host: I will decide who is wise and by the meaning of what you just said you must be a stupid ass
Floppy: Spankx
Host: Jack
Jack: I'm a farmer
Host Ha... your a f***ing looser
Jack: That's not what my pitch fork thinks
Host: Let's forget that. Last, introduce yourself Ron
Ron: I'm unemployed and I sit on my ass all day and drink beer
Host: so your an average American
Host: Let's start. Bill, What word does "therapist" turn into
Bill: UUUMMM... The rapist
Host: correct. Elka, when was Jesus born
Elka: In a Sveeden
Host: no I asked when
Host: Floppy what are you
Floppy a wise man
Host: No a fagot hahaha. Jack, what is 3*7
Jack: 21, I ain't stupid
Host: even if you were right I'm always on my period and I hate you
Jack: thank you, Mrs. Superwhore
Host: Bill, (all of a sudden the lights went out and gunshots rang out)
(Every body in the studio exept Ron and the host were shot to death. The host had a pitch fork in her head with a note that said " I told you so you incredible bitch." Jack had disappeared and Ron was sittind there sleeping with a brew in his left hand)
ANOTHER UNSOLVED MYSTERY
GOIN' DOWN IN HISTORY
