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Barrett: Oh my lord! Shield the children's eyes!
Red: (whimpers) arf..!
Aeris: (gulps) Tifa...er...what EXACTLY do you intend on doing with those...?!
Tifa: Well, I do have some connections with the newspaper...If you know what I mean! (winks and starts making a humping motion to the air)
Vincent: (suddenly appears) I know what she means! (runs up to her and sticks his head in her boobs)
Everyone but Tifa(she's kinda sloooow): Where'd you come from?
Vincent: I dunno... (gasps as he spots a caged Yuffie) Yuffie my love!! NOOO!
Sephiroth: Do the hustle! Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, doo doo
All: GO HOME, SEPHIROTH!
Sephiroth: WAAAAHHH!!!! WHOA!
Aeris: Why are you acting all weird, Vincent?
Vincent: I've been deprived of love from my little Yuffers!(runs out, carrying Yuffie)
Tifa: (clears throat) AHEM! My pictures!
All: Oh!
Barrett: Oh gawd! The children, think of the children! Shield their eyes!!! OH! THE HUMANITY!
Everyone but Tifa(didn't I explain why?): ok, that's enough...(looking at Barrett)
Cloud: I'll be RUINED!
Aeris: (faints)
Tifa: MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!! You'll never insult me or underestimagate my intelligence ever again!!! And Cloud will be mine once more!(runs out)
Aeris: (wakes up) ONCE AGAIN? What does she mean, Cloud?!
Cloud: (sweats nervously) Uhm! Er....! Heh...
Aeris: HMPH!!!! (stomps to her room and slams the door)
Barrett: CAT FIGHT! MEOW!
Cloud: (growls and beats up Barrett) Aeris! I can explain!
Sephiroth: (pops his head in the door) I'm just a girl who can't say no! hehe!
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What went on with Cloud and Tifa? Does Sephiroth have ANYTHING to do with this fic? Just exactly what DO the pictures look like? Find out in the next chapters of...The Threatening Pictures!
Narrator: Whew! This story sucks! The author must be PRETTY stupid! Ha ha.... I don't know why I even TOOK this job!
Aeris Striife: HEY! I heard that! (beats up the narrator) There!
Narrator: Ambulance?!