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Aeris is sitting on her bed, sobbing.
Cloud: (bursts through the door) Aeris! I can explain!
Aeris: Explain what? The hot sex you and Tifa had together in explicit detail?
Sephiroth: (runs into the room and sits down) Ooo! Bedtime stories!
A & C: (glare at Sephiroth) GO HOME, SEPHIROTH!
Sephiroth: WAAAHHH! WHOOA!
Cloud: Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah! No, I was just going to explain to you what happened.
Aeris:(wipes away a tear) *Sniff* O...k-kay
Cloud: Well, we were really drunk.....
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One night....
Cloud: You know Tifa *hic* I never knowed you was so pretty!
Tifa: Really? I dizn't know you wasa so hamsome *hic*!
Cloud: Wanna do it?! Cuz I'm really really*hic* horny!
Tifa: (laughs) Okay! Sounds like *hic* fun!
They do it.
Later, lying in bed....
Cloud: (sober) Whoa! What happened? (looks over to see Tifa) AAAAHH!!
Tifa: Heh heh! You're mine now, cutey!
Cloud: (scrambles out of bed) Oh man! I'm marrying Aeris in a week! Man! (shudders at the thought of doing Tifa) Sh*t man!
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Aeris: That doesn't prove anything. It just proves you drank a week before the wedding, as well as doing Tifa!!!(runs away)
Cloud: AERIS!!!!! Damn it!
Barret: (weakly) me-ow...
Cloud: (kicks Barret in his jewels) Shut up...
Barret: (in a high voice) Ouch...
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With Vince and Yuffie....
----Record scratches----
Aeris Striife: Hey! What's going on?!
Vincent: Ahem....My name is Vincent. NOT Vince.
Aeris Striife: Ok, whatever, Vinny... Let's roll it!
Vincent: No, look, ya see, It's Vincent, not Vinny!
Aeris Striife: Ok, Vin... Let's ro---
Vincent: OK! I'll explain it slowly....My name is Vincent. You may not call me Vinny, Vince, Vin, etc... Not you, not anybody!
Yuffie: Hey Vinny, let's get a move on!
Vincent: Yes, sweet cakes!
Aeris Striife: Whatever....
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With Tifa.....
Tifa: HA!!! Oooo...These pictures are giving me shivers! (reaches in her pocket) Wait....where are they? NOOOOOOOO!!!!!
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Stayed tuned for the next chapters of...The Threatening Pictures!!!
