Title: The Long And Winding Road
Author: Rob - fatabbot@btinternet.com
Archive: Not without permission please
Category: Carter/Abby
Rating: PG-13 for a bit of bad language and nasty thoughts
Spoilers: All of season 7
Author's notes: Please excuse any incorrect medical terminology or procedures in this chapter. My knowledge of them is somewhat limited :)
Disclaimer: The characters used in this story are not owned by myself. I'm just borrowing them, and promise to give them back. Also, any lyrics used in this story to head a scene were not written by myself. Again I am just borrowing them and giving them back untainted.
Summary: Carter goes into a downward spiral, causing Abby to rethink an important decision she's made.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 3 - Antidote
She'd seen hundreds of people on a ventilator before and she could never understand why so many people burst into tears when they saw their family member or friend hooked up to one. She walked into Carter's intensive care room not expecting anything. After all she was a nurse, there wasn't much that she hadn't seen. There was something about this though. As she got closer to the bed she could see every tube that was hooked up to him and the expression on his face. For a split second she thought that he was dead. "Oh Carter," she whimpered as she was slowly breaking. Not fighting her emotions she collapsed into one of the two chairs positioned by the bed put her head onto his stomach and cried. She sympathised with those people know. She was surprised no-one came to see what was going on as her sobs were deafening, that and the occasional, "why did you do it Carter? Why?" but there wasn't even a movement from beyond the door. Maybe this happens every day?
Carter was stable but he wasn't out of the woods. He was still unconscious and he still wasn't breathing on his own. Abby bravely looked up at his face. He looked so lifeless, she just wanted him to open his eyes and look at her the way he always did, with his lovely brown eyes that just screamed out to her, "don't worry Abby, everything's going to be ok." Then they would hug, instantly forgetting about the events transpired, and everything would be ok. He had a habit of doing things like that.
Slowly putting her head back down on his stomach she closed her eyes and remembered the last time Carter had relapsed. After working a 36-hour shift, then being up all night helping Dr. Chen deliver her baby and then working through a trauma he took some Vicodin that happened to be on the desk. Terrified, he ran to her immediately. That was the thing about Carter, since he came back from rehab he knew that he had a problem and he knew that he needed help. Maybe that was why he asked her to be his sponsor? It was somewhat surprising when he came running over to her and placed the two moistened pills in her hand. He had admitted to her about what he had done. That was a huge step for a drug addict. Recalling the time when he was confronted by Kerry and Mark she remembered him pacing up and down the room, firmly stating that some kind of mistake had been made. Everyone in that room knew he was lying and all of them held a little bit of regret inside of them. The fact that they almost allowed this to happen when all the signs were there. Abby was deprecating herself for three months because she almost cost the guy his job. She looked up at him again, she thought she'd wrecked this guys life. It was only when he made possibly the most sincere apology she'd ever heard that she changed her mind. She smiled. That's how good it was. Carter told her that she had saved his life, which made her dance inside. Whenever she felt down, which was quite often, she would just reminisce back to the time when Carter said to her, "if it wasn't for you I could be dead," and she would be lifted just enough to carry on with whatever the hell she was doing.
Slowly her face soured again. She may have saved Carter's life before, but now she could be the one who kills him...
****
"Mark do you know where Abby is?" Luka asked.
Mark looked up from his chart and wondered how he would take the news he was about to give him. If he was anything like Abby said then he wouldn't take it very well at all. "... She's up in intensive care."
Luka looked up at him, puzzled, "Why is she up there?"
Mark hesitated again, "She's in Carter's room." He noticed Luka's immediate change of expression. His face had gone cloudy. Abby was right.
"Ok thankyou," was all Luka could manage before he stormed towards the lift.
"No problem," Mark called out but Luka didn't hear him. He grimaced and wondered what Luka would say when he saw her in his room.
"There's gonna be sparks flying upstairs tonight!" Haleh said as she walked past Mark. Mark grinned, he really should try and stop the gossiping. But that would be harder than stopping a freight train.
****
"Breathe... Keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve."
Abby looked at Carter's face as she sat over him, gently stroking his forehead and pushing his hair up to keep it out of his eyes. She smiled, he really needed a haircut.
"What are you doing here?" a voice called out.
She knew who it was before she'd even looked up, "Hi Luka."
"What are you doing in here?" He asked again.
"What do you think I'm doing Luka?" Abby snapped back, "Carter has just had an overdose I think he needs some support don't you?"
"He's unconscious Abby."
"So?"
"You don't need to be up here. The nurses will look after him," Luka was clearly aggravated. He had jealousy rubbed all over his face.
"Maybe I want to look after him."
"You don't need to Abby," he said, trying to sympathise.
"Yes I do."
"Why?"
Abby looked at Carter again, "you wouldn't understand."
Luka started to raise his voice, "how can I understand when you wont tell me. You never talk to me anymore Abby. Why is it you can rattle all your problems off to Carter but you can't talk to me."
"Is this what this is all about?" Abby asked. Luka didn't say anything. "I can't believe you would get so jealous," she said with a little humour in her voice. Again Luka remained silent. Abby rolled her eyes and looked back down at Carter, "I'll see you tomorrow Luka."
Luka turned away too angry to say anything, but he had nothing to say anyway.
****
"Breathe... Keep breathing. I can't do this alone."
She opened her eyes abruptly and was surprised by the light coming in through the nearby window. She couldn't remember even closing her eyes but she had actually got a good nights sleep. Not hard considering it was her first in two days. Not bothering to move she knew exactly where she was and why she was there.
"Excuse me miss, it's not recommendable that you sleep on the patients."
Abby lifted her head quickly realising she had fallen asleep with her head on Carter's chest. The voice belonged to an intensive care nurse who had walked in to check Carter's status. With one eye open and one hand trying to fluff up the hair that had stuck to the side of her face Abby watched the nurse look at the various monitors.
"I see you've made an improvement Dr. Carter."
Abby spun around quickly, a wave of optimism overcoming her. She once told herself not to be too optimistic in life and the same applied today. Carter was still lying with his eyes shut tight, with tubes coming out of his mouth, looking like the immovable object that he was. For a brief second Abby thought that he was watching her sleep and that he was completely recovered. Not today. She immediately hated the nurse for making her act like such a dunce. "Sorry about that... falling asleep on him." She attempted a smile.
It must have been successful as the nurse smiled back. She was young and looked like she was a first day rookie. Abby hoped that for Carter's sake she wasn't. "That's ok."
"How's he doing," Abby said as she turned to look at him.
"Slightly better than when he came in," the nurse replied, "we still don't know when he will regain consciousness though."
"So he's out of the woods?"
The nurse scrunched her face up. Abby hated her even more. "Most likely," she said, "but it's still too early to be sure."
Abby felt a huge weight drop off her shoulders. It looked like he was going to pull through. She looked down at him again and smiled, genuinely this time.
"So how long have you been together?" the nurse asked, trying to create conversation as she did her job.
Abby cough-laughed, "oh we're not together," she smiled again, "he's a really close friend." She saw the nurse smile a knowing smile, "no really... I have a boyfriend." She said almost in defence. The nurse didn't say anything, she just continued with that smile that was making Abby feel uneasy. As she walked out of the room Abby was shocked. She definitely hated that nurse now. She turned to Carter, "did you hear that?" she said to him, "you're going to be fine." She moved in towards him and kissed him gently on the forehead, "you're going to be fine."
****
It was midday by the time she got back at her apartment. She felt guilty about leaving Carter on his own but the nurses, and then the supervisor insisted that she go home and let them work without badgering them for answers about whether Carter would wake up soon. She didn't know why she was asking them, as there was no way they would know but she just had a gut feeling that sooner or later he was going to open his eyes. She was going to be there when he did.
Looking around at the squalid mess that was her home she sighed. She really should have stayed at the hospital, it was in a better condition than this place. Finding some coffee she had the machine going quickly as she was in need of a caffeine fix. Maybe she could get some sleep too. Even though it was unlikely she thought it was definitely a good idea. After all she'd had 6 hours sleep in the last two and a half days and she was working a shift tonight. Damn, she rued herself for not trying to get the night off. Carter was going to wake up soon, or so she hoped anyway, and she had to work tonight. Perfect.
Sitting at the breakfast table sipping on her coffee she again thought about the events of the last few days. Only now she had far much more hope.
****
For the second time in a day Abby opened her eyes abruptly as she was startled and awoke. Noticing the time she quickly ran into the shower and in a split second was feeling the relief of warm water splashing on her body. She paused for a second when she thought she heard something, but then carried on after dismissing it. The sleep she'd got had actually rejuvenated her and she was ready for her shift... a first.
Stepping out of the shower she thought about what she could do tonight in terms of Carter and his intensive care room. She could spend her breaks and lunch up there but she knew that for the majority of the evening she would have to worry. Not good news for her patients...
As she walked out of her bathroom she noticed that someone had left a message on her answering machine. Stopping as she dried her hair she pressed play.
"Hi Abby... its me Luka. Call me whenever you get this ok... We need to talk."
She walked through into her bedroom and started pulling on clothes. "Good," she said to herself. She had something to say to him too.
****
"Dr. Weaver!" Abby called out, "Can I have my break now?" it was the third time she had asked in the space of twenty minutes.
Kerry grinned, she normally detested people asking her if they could have their break all the time. This time though she could smile in the face of it all. She knew where Abby wanted to be. "Ok Abby, you've been annoying enough. Go and have your break."
Abby beamed, "thankyou so much Dr. Weaver," and skipped off toward the elevator.
"What's she so happy about?" Dr. Dave Malucci asked.
"I guess Carter is improving..." Weaver replied.
****
"Can't get the stink off. He's been hanging round for days."
Abby had been in a good mood at work. The thought almost made her shudder. Was that legal? As she predicted she was thinking about Carter non-stop, but the fact that he was improving rapidly made those thoughts positive. Even now when she arrived at his room there was more good news, he was doing so well that they had taken him off the ventilator. Granted he was still wearing an oxygen mask it was still an improvement. It was another thing to be happy about. These last few days made her realise how much she needed Carter in her life. She sat down next to him and took his hand in hers. She rubbed it gently and whispered, "open your eyes Carter... open your eyes for me."
A knock at the door made her jump... "Come in!"
It was Luka, "hi," he said. It was a mixture of anger and fear. Anger that she was with Carter again, fear that he could easily say the wrong thing.
Abby looked up, "hi."
"Did you get my message?"
She tried to act annoyed, "oh... yeah... damn. Sorry I was going to call... it must have slipped my mind." A pitiful attempt. Luka probably wouldn't spot it.
"Can we talk outside?"
Abby looked down at Carter again, "erm... sure," she placed Carter's hand on his chest and walked out of the room with Luka. "What's up," she said, trying to act as casual as possible.
"Why are you up here again?"
Abby rolled her eyes, "Luka! I already told you. Carter needs my support..."
He cut her off, "He has everyone's support! There is no one in the ER who doesn't want him to pull through this. Why do you have to spend every free moment you have up here?"
Abby looked through the door at Carter, "because he did this because of me."
"Abby you're being paranoid."
"No Luka I'm not. Carter did this because I told him we couldn't be friends anymore..."
Luka seemed shocked, "Why did you do that?"
"Because of you..." Abby replied, waiting for a response.
****
Carter slowly and surely opened his eyes. The last thing he could remember was sitting in his bathroom, and now he was in what looked like a hospital bed with an oxygen mask over his mouth. Slowly gathering his thoughts, he noticed Abby outside. He half-smiled but this quickly disappeared when he saw Luka standing next to her. He looked at them... they both seemed annoyed. Were they having an argument? He desperately tried to listen to what they were saying. He could tell from their faces that their voices were getting louder, but he just couldn't make out what they were saying...
****
"What so we're back here again. I'm fed up with having this same argument every day." The fight was becoming more heated. The last person Abby had argued like this with was Richard.
"You might be fed up with it Abby but this is important to me. Why can't you talk to me? I want you to tell me your problems, not Carter..."
"Ok you want to know why I don't tell you my problems Luka?" she saw him nod, "because you are my problems..." she looked down at the floor.
Luka looked down and bit his lip. He felt a little hurt by what she had just said. He was strangely pleased that he had got her to open up to him, but still being told that you are a problem never goes down well. Maybe that's why she never spoke to him? "Abby..."
"Luka I care about you I really do, but the way this is going I can't see any future for us. We can't talk to each other, I'm prepared to admit that. And I also know that it's my fault too..."
"No Abby," Luka cut in, "you're right." He looked up and smiled, surprising her. He nodded again and slowly turned and walked back down the hall.
Abby paused briefly to think about what had just happened. Was that the end? She wasn't sure. She thought it was best not to dawn on it too much. She watched Luka walk down the stairs and then turned to go back inside...
****
Carter was closely watching the argument between Abby and Luka. Although he couldn't hear what they were saying he was certain it was pretty serious. This wasn't a little thing that she used to bitch to him about. This looked big. He watched as Luka walked away smiling, and thought that maybe they had sorted it all out. As Luka turned away his attention turned to Abby. She stood there looking confused, but as beautiful as ever...
****
As Abby walked inside she looked at Carter and smiled. His improvement was noticeable, his skin had more colour and he was breathing on his own, it was all very positive. She walked towards the curtains and busied herself trying to straighten them out. Looking at her watch she noticed that she should be getting back downstairs. Weaver would probably be looking for her. She walked toward the door and turned to look at Carter once more before she left... He was staring straight back at her.
Immediately a huge smile spread across her face and she walked quickly towards the head of the bed. "Hey!" she said, delighted, "Hey!" she felt tears slowly build around her eyes. Carter tried to speak but she put a finger on her lips, "no, no shh, shh," she said. She reached down and stroked his forehead with her thumb. Carter lifted his arm and held her hand as she felt tears come down her face. She could never remember being so happy that she cried. She looked Carter in the eyes and noticed he was doing the same thing. His mouth was moving slightly, he was trying to speak but was too tired to do so. She moved in and tenderly kissed his forehead and wiped away the few tears that were dropping down his face. Carter tried to lift his arm up to Abby's face so he could do the same but he was too weak. Seeing this Abby took hold of his hand and pressed it up to her cheek, she felt his finger gently run little circles on her face and she smiled at him again. She looked down at him staring lovingly into her eyes and mouthed the words, "I love you," before kissing his hand gently. He didn't have to say anything... the small squeeze he gave her hand told her everything she needed to know.
****
"You are the sun and moon and stars are you."
****
TO BE CONTINUED
Author: Rob - fatabbot@btinternet.com
Archive: Not without permission please
Category: Carter/Abby
Rating: PG-13 for a bit of bad language and nasty thoughts
Spoilers: All of season 7
Author's notes: Please excuse any incorrect medical terminology or procedures in this chapter. My knowledge of them is somewhat limited :)
Disclaimer: The characters used in this story are not owned by myself. I'm just borrowing them, and promise to give them back. Also, any lyrics used in this story to head a scene were not written by myself. Again I am just borrowing them and giving them back untainted.
Summary: Carter goes into a downward spiral, causing Abby to rethink an important decision she's made.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 3 - Antidote
She'd seen hundreds of people on a ventilator before and she could never understand why so many people burst into tears when they saw their family member or friend hooked up to one. She walked into Carter's intensive care room not expecting anything. After all she was a nurse, there wasn't much that she hadn't seen. There was something about this though. As she got closer to the bed she could see every tube that was hooked up to him and the expression on his face. For a split second she thought that he was dead. "Oh Carter," she whimpered as she was slowly breaking. Not fighting her emotions she collapsed into one of the two chairs positioned by the bed put her head onto his stomach and cried. She sympathised with those people know. She was surprised no-one came to see what was going on as her sobs were deafening, that and the occasional, "why did you do it Carter? Why?" but there wasn't even a movement from beyond the door. Maybe this happens every day?
Carter was stable but he wasn't out of the woods. He was still unconscious and he still wasn't breathing on his own. Abby bravely looked up at his face. He looked so lifeless, she just wanted him to open his eyes and look at her the way he always did, with his lovely brown eyes that just screamed out to her, "don't worry Abby, everything's going to be ok." Then they would hug, instantly forgetting about the events transpired, and everything would be ok. He had a habit of doing things like that.
Slowly putting her head back down on his stomach she closed her eyes and remembered the last time Carter had relapsed. After working a 36-hour shift, then being up all night helping Dr. Chen deliver her baby and then working through a trauma he took some Vicodin that happened to be on the desk. Terrified, he ran to her immediately. That was the thing about Carter, since he came back from rehab he knew that he had a problem and he knew that he needed help. Maybe that was why he asked her to be his sponsor? It was somewhat surprising when he came running over to her and placed the two moistened pills in her hand. He had admitted to her about what he had done. That was a huge step for a drug addict. Recalling the time when he was confronted by Kerry and Mark she remembered him pacing up and down the room, firmly stating that some kind of mistake had been made. Everyone in that room knew he was lying and all of them held a little bit of regret inside of them. The fact that they almost allowed this to happen when all the signs were there. Abby was deprecating herself for three months because she almost cost the guy his job. She looked up at him again, she thought she'd wrecked this guys life. It was only when he made possibly the most sincere apology she'd ever heard that she changed her mind. She smiled. That's how good it was. Carter told her that she had saved his life, which made her dance inside. Whenever she felt down, which was quite often, she would just reminisce back to the time when Carter said to her, "if it wasn't for you I could be dead," and she would be lifted just enough to carry on with whatever the hell she was doing.
Slowly her face soured again. She may have saved Carter's life before, but now she could be the one who kills him...
****
"Mark do you know where Abby is?" Luka asked.
Mark looked up from his chart and wondered how he would take the news he was about to give him. If he was anything like Abby said then he wouldn't take it very well at all. "... She's up in intensive care."
Luka looked up at him, puzzled, "Why is she up there?"
Mark hesitated again, "She's in Carter's room." He noticed Luka's immediate change of expression. His face had gone cloudy. Abby was right.
"Ok thankyou," was all Luka could manage before he stormed towards the lift.
"No problem," Mark called out but Luka didn't hear him. He grimaced and wondered what Luka would say when he saw her in his room.
"There's gonna be sparks flying upstairs tonight!" Haleh said as she walked past Mark. Mark grinned, he really should try and stop the gossiping. But that would be harder than stopping a freight train.
****
"Breathe... Keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve."
Abby looked at Carter's face as she sat over him, gently stroking his forehead and pushing his hair up to keep it out of his eyes. She smiled, he really needed a haircut.
"What are you doing here?" a voice called out.
She knew who it was before she'd even looked up, "Hi Luka."
"What are you doing in here?" He asked again.
"What do you think I'm doing Luka?" Abby snapped back, "Carter has just had an overdose I think he needs some support don't you?"
"He's unconscious Abby."
"So?"
"You don't need to be up here. The nurses will look after him," Luka was clearly aggravated. He had jealousy rubbed all over his face.
"Maybe I want to look after him."
"You don't need to Abby," he said, trying to sympathise.
"Yes I do."
"Why?"
Abby looked at Carter again, "you wouldn't understand."
Luka started to raise his voice, "how can I understand when you wont tell me. You never talk to me anymore Abby. Why is it you can rattle all your problems off to Carter but you can't talk to me."
"Is this what this is all about?" Abby asked. Luka didn't say anything. "I can't believe you would get so jealous," she said with a little humour in her voice. Again Luka remained silent. Abby rolled her eyes and looked back down at Carter, "I'll see you tomorrow Luka."
Luka turned away too angry to say anything, but he had nothing to say anyway.
****
"Breathe... Keep breathing. I can't do this alone."
She opened her eyes abruptly and was surprised by the light coming in through the nearby window. She couldn't remember even closing her eyes but she had actually got a good nights sleep. Not hard considering it was her first in two days. Not bothering to move she knew exactly where she was and why she was there.
"Excuse me miss, it's not recommendable that you sleep on the patients."
Abby lifted her head quickly realising she had fallen asleep with her head on Carter's chest. The voice belonged to an intensive care nurse who had walked in to check Carter's status. With one eye open and one hand trying to fluff up the hair that had stuck to the side of her face Abby watched the nurse look at the various monitors.
"I see you've made an improvement Dr. Carter."
Abby spun around quickly, a wave of optimism overcoming her. She once told herself not to be too optimistic in life and the same applied today. Carter was still lying with his eyes shut tight, with tubes coming out of his mouth, looking like the immovable object that he was. For a brief second Abby thought that he was watching her sleep and that he was completely recovered. Not today. She immediately hated the nurse for making her act like such a dunce. "Sorry about that... falling asleep on him." She attempted a smile.
It must have been successful as the nurse smiled back. She was young and looked like she was a first day rookie. Abby hoped that for Carter's sake she wasn't. "That's ok."
"How's he doing," Abby said as she turned to look at him.
"Slightly better than when he came in," the nurse replied, "we still don't know when he will regain consciousness though."
"So he's out of the woods?"
The nurse scrunched her face up. Abby hated her even more. "Most likely," she said, "but it's still too early to be sure."
Abby felt a huge weight drop off her shoulders. It looked like he was going to pull through. She looked down at him again and smiled, genuinely this time.
"So how long have you been together?" the nurse asked, trying to create conversation as she did her job.
Abby cough-laughed, "oh we're not together," she smiled again, "he's a really close friend." She saw the nurse smile a knowing smile, "no really... I have a boyfriend." She said almost in defence. The nurse didn't say anything, she just continued with that smile that was making Abby feel uneasy. As she walked out of the room Abby was shocked. She definitely hated that nurse now. She turned to Carter, "did you hear that?" she said to him, "you're going to be fine." She moved in towards him and kissed him gently on the forehead, "you're going to be fine."
****
It was midday by the time she got back at her apartment. She felt guilty about leaving Carter on his own but the nurses, and then the supervisor insisted that she go home and let them work without badgering them for answers about whether Carter would wake up soon. She didn't know why she was asking them, as there was no way they would know but she just had a gut feeling that sooner or later he was going to open his eyes. She was going to be there when he did.
Looking around at the squalid mess that was her home she sighed. She really should have stayed at the hospital, it was in a better condition than this place. Finding some coffee she had the machine going quickly as she was in need of a caffeine fix. Maybe she could get some sleep too. Even though it was unlikely she thought it was definitely a good idea. After all she'd had 6 hours sleep in the last two and a half days and she was working a shift tonight. Damn, she rued herself for not trying to get the night off. Carter was going to wake up soon, or so she hoped anyway, and she had to work tonight. Perfect.
Sitting at the breakfast table sipping on her coffee she again thought about the events of the last few days. Only now she had far much more hope.
****
For the second time in a day Abby opened her eyes abruptly as she was startled and awoke. Noticing the time she quickly ran into the shower and in a split second was feeling the relief of warm water splashing on her body. She paused for a second when she thought she heard something, but then carried on after dismissing it. The sleep she'd got had actually rejuvenated her and she was ready for her shift... a first.
Stepping out of the shower she thought about what she could do tonight in terms of Carter and his intensive care room. She could spend her breaks and lunch up there but she knew that for the majority of the evening she would have to worry. Not good news for her patients...
As she walked out of her bathroom she noticed that someone had left a message on her answering machine. Stopping as she dried her hair she pressed play.
"Hi Abby... its me Luka. Call me whenever you get this ok... We need to talk."
She walked through into her bedroom and started pulling on clothes. "Good," she said to herself. She had something to say to him too.
****
"Dr. Weaver!" Abby called out, "Can I have my break now?" it was the third time she had asked in the space of twenty minutes.
Kerry grinned, she normally detested people asking her if they could have their break all the time. This time though she could smile in the face of it all. She knew where Abby wanted to be. "Ok Abby, you've been annoying enough. Go and have your break."
Abby beamed, "thankyou so much Dr. Weaver," and skipped off toward the elevator.
"What's she so happy about?" Dr. Dave Malucci asked.
"I guess Carter is improving..." Weaver replied.
****
"Can't get the stink off. He's been hanging round for days."
Abby had been in a good mood at work. The thought almost made her shudder. Was that legal? As she predicted she was thinking about Carter non-stop, but the fact that he was improving rapidly made those thoughts positive. Even now when she arrived at his room there was more good news, he was doing so well that they had taken him off the ventilator. Granted he was still wearing an oxygen mask it was still an improvement. It was another thing to be happy about. These last few days made her realise how much she needed Carter in her life. She sat down next to him and took his hand in hers. She rubbed it gently and whispered, "open your eyes Carter... open your eyes for me."
A knock at the door made her jump... "Come in!"
It was Luka, "hi," he said. It was a mixture of anger and fear. Anger that she was with Carter again, fear that he could easily say the wrong thing.
Abby looked up, "hi."
"Did you get my message?"
She tried to act annoyed, "oh... yeah... damn. Sorry I was going to call... it must have slipped my mind." A pitiful attempt. Luka probably wouldn't spot it.
"Can we talk outside?"
Abby looked down at Carter again, "erm... sure," she placed Carter's hand on his chest and walked out of the room with Luka. "What's up," she said, trying to act as casual as possible.
"Why are you up here again?"
Abby rolled her eyes, "Luka! I already told you. Carter needs my support..."
He cut her off, "He has everyone's support! There is no one in the ER who doesn't want him to pull through this. Why do you have to spend every free moment you have up here?"
Abby looked through the door at Carter, "because he did this because of me."
"Abby you're being paranoid."
"No Luka I'm not. Carter did this because I told him we couldn't be friends anymore..."
Luka seemed shocked, "Why did you do that?"
"Because of you..." Abby replied, waiting for a response.
****
Carter slowly and surely opened his eyes. The last thing he could remember was sitting in his bathroom, and now he was in what looked like a hospital bed with an oxygen mask over his mouth. Slowly gathering his thoughts, he noticed Abby outside. He half-smiled but this quickly disappeared when he saw Luka standing next to her. He looked at them... they both seemed annoyed. Were they having an argument? He desperately tried to listen to what they were saying. He could tell from their faces that their voices were getting louder, but he just couldn't make out what they were saying...
****
"What so we're back here again. I'm fed up with having this same argument every day." The fight was becoming more heated. The last person Abby had argued like this with was Richard.
"You might be fed up with it Abby but this is important to me. Why can't you talk to me? I want you to tell me your problems, not Carter..."
"Ok you want to know why I don't tell you my problems Luka?" she saw him nod, "because you are my problems..." she looked down at the floor.
Luka looked down and bit his lip. He felt a little hurt by what she had just said. He was strangely pleased that he had got her to open up to him, but still being told that you are a problem never goes down well. Maybe that's why she never spoke to him? "Abby..."
"Luka I care about you I really do, but the way this is going I can't see any future for us. We can't talk to each other, I'm prepared to admit that. And I also know that it's my fault too..."
"No Abby," Luka cut in, "you're right." He looked up and smiled, surprising her. He nodded again and slowly turned and walked back down the hall.
Abby paused briefly to think about what had just happened. Was that the end? She wasn't sure. She thought it was best not to dawn on it too much. She watched Luka walk down the stairs and then turned to go back inside...
****
Carter was closely watching the argument between Abby and Luka. Although he couldn't hear what they were saying he was certain it was pretty serious. This wasn't a little thing that she used to bitch to him about. This looked big. He watched as Luka walked away smiling, and thought that maybe they had sorted it all out. As Luka turned away his attention turned to Abby. She stood there looking confused, but as beautiful as ever...
****
As Abby walked inside she looked at Carter and smiled. His improvement was noticeable, his skin had more colour and he was breathing on his own, it was all very positive. She walked towards the curtains and busied herself trying to straighten them out. Looking at her watch she noticed that she should be getting back downstairs. Weaver would probably be looking for her. She walked toward the door and turned to look at Carter once more before she left... He was staring straight back at her.
Immediately a huge smile spread across her face and she walked quickly towards the head of the bed. "Hey!" she said, delighted, "Hey!" she felt tears slowly build around her eyes. Carter tried to speak but she put a finger on her lips, "no, no shh, shh," she said. She reached down and stroked his forehead with her thumb. Carter lifted his arm and held her hand as she felt tears come down her face. She could never remember being so happy that she cried. She looked Carter in the eyes and noticed he was doing the same thing. His mouth was moving slightly, he was trying to speak but was too tired to do so. She moved in and tenderly kissed his forehead and wiped away the few tears that were dropping down his face. Carter tried to lift his arm up to Abby's face so he could do the same but he was too weak. Seeing this Abby took hold of his hand and pressed it up to her cheek, she felt his finger gently run little circles on her face and she smiled at him again. She looked down at him staring lovingly into her eyes and mouthed the words, "I love you," before kissing his hand gently. He didn't have to say anything... the small squeeze he gave her hand told her everything she needed to know.
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"You are the sun and moon and stars are you."
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TO BE CONTINUED