***Sarah, Sephiroth, Cloud, and Red are seated on the couches, watching various TV shows. Reno and Rude are sitting at the bar, harassing Tifa.***
Sarah- *channel surfs* Hmm.. Baywatch.. Nah. *flips* Discovery Channel..? *sees that it is a documentary on wasps* AAAHHHHH!!!! NO!! *drops the controller*
Sephiroth- *grins evily, and grabs the controller, turning up the volume full blast*
**The freaky sound of wasps buzzing fills the room**
Cloud- Um... *blinks*
Red- *twitches* My ears... Highly... Sensitive... *twitches again and collapses*
Sarah- STOP IT!!!!! *shrieks, getting up and running out of the room, and into the kitchen area*
Sephiroth- Hmm.. *sees Cloud looking at him* I hate people that channel surf. *turns it onto the preview channel and watches the scrolling with delight*
**In the kitchen...**
Sarah- *sits at the table, guzzling down iced tea, muttering inbetween gulps*
**Rufus wanders in, sitting down at the table**
Rufus- *sigh*
Sarah- *sets down her glass* You okay?
Rufus- No, not really. *sigh*
Sarah- Why not? *sips from her glass*
Rufus- *starts to speak, but is interupted when Reeve strolls in, acting very paranoid*
Reeve- *looks behind himself, shaking* They're here, I can feel it!!!
Sarah- *quirks a brow* Who, Reeve?
Reeve- *jumps, screaming like a little girl* The bunnies!! *runs back out*
Rufus- Odd.. *sigh*
Sarah- You were saying..?
Rufus- *sighs, again, which is really getting on Sarah's nerves* Well, I was in Junon, minding my own business, when this weirdo came up to me and asked me if I liked pink fairy wings.. I said no, and he kept following me around, saying that I was being biased towards fairies with pink wings and I said-
Sarah- *nods* Cut to the chase, hun.
Rufus- Um.. Well.. He followed me home.. and he won't stop harrassing me!! *cries*
Sarah- Uh-huh....
Rufus- *frown* Okay. Anyway, so the little fairy man kidnapped my precious Dark Nation!! *tears well up* And I don't know what to do!!
**The doorbell rings**
Sarah- *mutters* Thank goodness.. *speaking louder* Oh, I've got to get the door..
Reeve- *runs through the hallway, screaming that the 'bunnies' are trying to get him*
**Meanwhile, in the REC room**
Red- *finally starts to come to, his tail twitching* That was... painful.
Sephiroth- *jumps up and down* Yay!! Barney comes on at one!! *notices there are people around* Ahem, I mean, oh dear god, why is that legal?!
Cloud- *narrows his eyes* What about my feelings?! *grabs his Ultima Weapon and starts chasing Sephiroth with it*
Sephiroth- What the..?! *can't find his Masamune anywhere*
Red- *chuckles, jumping onto the largest couch and going to sleep* ZzzZZzzzz..
Cloud- *stops chasing Sephiroth when he sees Reno at the bar* You killed all the people at Sector Seven!! Die!! *goes after a drunken Reno*
Reno- *looks up from his beer to see one blonde mercenary running at him with a very big sword*...Hi..
Sephiroth- *watches in amusement, then decides to exit the room*
**Meanwhile, Sarah goes to answer the door...**
?????- Hello?! *high-pitched*
Sarah- *looks through the peekhole, grimacing slightly*...Bunni.
Bunni- *opens the door and giggles* Hey Sarah!! What's up?!
Sarah- The sky.. *lets the girl in* What're you doing here, of all places?
Bunni- This nice little man with pretty pink wingies said that I was supoosed to come, so I did...!!
Sarah- *sigh*
Reeve- *runs through the hallway. Sarah stops him*
Sarah- Reeve, this is Bunni, Bunni-
Reeve- NOT THE BUNNIES!!!! *runs and jumps out of the window, falling onto the grass*
Bunni- Oh dear!! Are you okay? *runs after him*
**Later that evening, Sarah has spoken with Reeve, Rufus, and Bunni about the bunnies and man with pink wings. They come to the conclusion that it is Sarah's infamous stalker...**
Sephiroth- You? You have a stalker? *jealous* I want one..
Bunni- OKAY!! *jumps on his lap*
Sephiroth- EW! Not you!! *stands up quickly, knocking Bunni off and sits down beside Red* Good kitty... *pets Red on the head*
Red- *growls* I am NOT a cat. *goes and sits by Sarah*
Sarah- *looks around in silence, waiting until everyone shuts up*...Right. Anyway, this idiot has some weird and perverse obsession with me.. So, we have to get rid of him. Any suggestions?
Reeve- *rocks back and forth* Kill the bunnies.. Kill the bunnies..
Bunni- *whimpers*
**Cloud, a bloody Reno, Rude, Vincent, Barret, Cid, Tifa, and Yuffie come in. Ah, the necessity of being 'fashionably late'...**
Yuffie- Is this a materia party?
Rude-...
Reno- *responds to Rude* Damn.. Ow.. Straight.. *limps to a couch*
Tifa- *pushes Cloud along in a wheelchair* Be strong, Cloud.
Cloud- I'm fine, Tifa. Really, I don't need to be in this wheelchair!
Tifa- *slaps him* Be strong!
Cloud- *his heasd lolls around on his neck for a moment*
Tifa- Oh no!! The Mako poisoning!! *cries*
Sarah- Tifa, please stop being abusive towards Cloud.
Tifa- I'm not being abusive!!
Barret- Ya tell 'em, sista!!
Cid- $%^$^$^!!!
Red- Ears.. hurt.. *twitches*
Vincent-...Lucrecia.
Sarah- *coughs fakely* Ahem..?
Bunni- *bounces up and down* Sarah!
Sarah- Anyway, does anyone have any sugestions on how to get rid of stalkers..? *blink*
Cloud- *mumbles* Wish I could get rid of Tifa.. Always trying to get me into a wheelchair...
Tifa- *casts Sleepel on Cloud* He-he..
Bunni- *bouncing higher* Sarah!
Sarah- *ignores Bunni*
Barret- How 'bout we'z blow 'em up! *roars with laughter* %$^^#@!! All the Shinra!!
All- *blank look*
Bunni- Sarah?! *sniffs*
Sarah- *pops her knuckles* Hmm?
Bunni- There he is. There's Carlos Juan.. *points to the big bay window, where, sure enough, a short little boy with pink fairy wings is spying on them*
All- *look to the window*
Sarah- Noooo!!!
Bunni- He-he! What I need now is a strong man to protect me from this pervert!!*looks to Sephiroth*
Sephiroth- Eh? *looks around, unsure about what's going on*
Cloud- Hey, wait.. Didn't I kill you?
Sephiroth- Um.. I was only sleeping.. Yeah.. That's right... *snaps his fingers* You must've linked an Elemental with a Transform.. Uh, yeah.. *moves away*
CJ-*taps on the window, fluttering his pretty pink wings, speaking in a girlie voice* Sarah, doll, why don't you get your cute little butt over here and help me in...*winks*
Sarah- *faints*
Vincent- *(who just happens to be standing by Sarah)catches her as she falls to the floor* Hmm...
Bunni- Ack! Aw.. Poor Sarah!! *a crashing noise is heard, along with the breaking of glass*
CJ-Oh, Yay! I'm like, in!! *notices Bunni* Ooh, Hello, my pretty little vixen, how are you feeling today?
Bunni-*whimpers, looking around the room for help*
Tifa- My God! Why is she flirting with him like that?! She's such a slut.
Bunni- Hey! I'm not flirting, wench! *sticks out her tongue*
Cloud- Gah...*tries to get up*
Tifa-*knocks him back down* Stay! *smiles* Be strong, Cloud!
Cid- *stands up to leave and steps on Red's tail* $$^$^$!!
Red- *growls* Stupid human..
**Reeve, Reno, Rude, and Tseng, now realize that Carlos Juan was the man with the pink fairy wings. They scream like little girls and run away**
CJ- *who is dangerously close to Bunni* Hey babe.. *flutters his wings and starts making kissing noises*
Bunni- Help me... please...
Vincent-*looks around hopelessly and then drops Sarah on a nearby couch*...
Sarah- Oh..Vincent..
Vincent- *gulp*
Bunni- *cries* Go away.. I'm so scared!!
Sephiroth- *looks around* Am I supposed to be doing something? *snaps his fingers* Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be polishing my Masamune!
Bunni- Help me someone.. I'll give you a reward...
Sephiroth- *looks up from his sword* Really?
Bunni- *nods, slowly trying to edge away from Carlos Juan*
CJ-* jumps up and sits on Bunni's lap, giggling* So, girlfriend, How's it goin'?
Sephiroth-*Stands up and starts acting really heroic. He slowly pulls his sword out of nowhere and swishes it around in slow motion, then he curls his hands into fists and places them on his waist and puffs out his chest* Get off of her, you filthy pansy! *mutters* This had better have a good reward!
CJ- Oh, girl! What a pretty sword!
Sephiroth- Oh? You think so? *thinks* Hey!
Bunni-*Drools* Yes.. pretty sword... Oops.. I don't think you guys were talking about that sword were you?
CJ- I was... *then smiling* What?
Sephiroth- I'm not a girl!! *lunges at him*
Vincent- ... *leaning in to listen to Sarah* ..?
Sephiroth-*gets confused, then angrily lunges at him again, slashing at CJ's head* You will die! Then I will become one with the Planet and become God!!! *laughs maniacally*
Bunni- *sigh* He's such a hottie.. I wanna become one with the Planet with him!!
Sarah- Vincent.. *latches onto his bionic arm*
Vincent- *tries in vain to wrest Sarah off of his arm* ..!
Cj-Well, girls, I can see.. *pouting* ..that I'm not wanted here any more!! So I'll go now..*flies away, and everyone can hear him crying like a baby*
Bunni- *pops up from her seat* Oh! My Hero! * runs and flings her arms around his neck and kisses him passionately* Oh, Sephy, I love you!
Sephiroth- Off of me, woman!! *Tries to push her off, but to no avail*
Sarah- Ooh.. Vincent... I NEED you! *she now has him in a head lock, which he is struggling desperately to get out of*
Sephiroth-*finally pushes Bunni away* Hmph! Woman! What do you think you are doing?
Bunni-*smiles innocently* I wanted to give you your reward!
Sephiroth- Ew.. That's... Ew!!! Almost as 'ew' as Hojo!!*Runs away*
Bunni- *her innocent smile turns evil and she runs after him* Come back my love!
Sephiroth- *pulls out his Masamune* Okay, I will..
Bunni- You know you want me!
Sephiroth- No, not really... *but runs away anyway*
Sarah-*slowly awakens* ....?
Vincent-....
Sarah-....
Vincent-....
Sarah- You.. I.. Uh... While I was sleeping!!!!
Vincent-What?!? But- *thinks* I love that movie.. *then again* What!?
Sarah-*jumps up* I trusted you!! *runs to the bathroom and locks the door*
Vincent-...
**In the Bathroom**
Sarah- *smiles* He-he... He's so cute... *realizes something* My materia!!! Yuffie!!!! That %^^%$!!!
**Cuts to the chase between Sephiroth and Bunni**
Sephiroth- *tries to slash at Bunni with his sword as they run* Go away, you psycho!
Bunni- Come back, my insane, silver-haired lover! I want to stalk you!!
Sephiroth- Aren't you doing that already?!
Bunni- *thinks* Oh yeah... *stops chasing him and returns to the couch area*
**Cuts to chase number two**
Yuffie- *counts the orbs of materia she stole from Sarah* Four, five... What's after that?
Sarah- Yuffie!!! Give me back my Materia!!!!! You *%$^(*(!!!!!
Yuffie- Eep! *runs*
**Switch over to CJ**
CJ-*Cries softly in his new home* Oh.. I love those two girls.. I want to-*Falls out of his tree* Ow..
Rude, Tseng, Reno, and Reeve- HAHA! *point to Carlos Juan, who is lying on the ground, his pink fairy wings broken*
CJ- Aww! You guys are mean!! *cries, and stands, unable to fly. He tries to climb the tree, falling several times in the process*
Narrator- So begins the new journey of our friends....
The End... Or is it?