This is AU, simply for the fact that Tony and Westphalen are not in the same season. This was brought to my attention by Morgan. Thank you. Also, thanks go out to JediK1 for mentioning that Tony never calls him "Lucas", rather, he calls him Luke. And, thank you Nain, for pointing out that I had no distinguishing marks when it came to the characters' thoughts. These are the changes that have been brought to my attention for Chapters 1 & 2 as of 06/01/01. Thank you!
If Only Memories Could be Erased As Easily [Chapter 2]
Lucas swung his legs as he sat impatiently on the bed. He asked, "Are you done yet, Doctor?"
"Almost, Lucas," Westphalen replied patiently. She felt along his ribs lightly, surprised when Lucas flinched.
"What do we have here?" she asked, almost to herself as she felt along his ribs again.
"Nothing," Lucas answered defensively. "I probably just hit it against something hard." He combed his fingers through his hair as he avoided her eyes.
"Right," she replied, sounding as if she didn't believe his story for one second. "And why haven't you been eating much, might I ask?" she asked softly.
Lucas shrugged. "You can tell?" He sighed softly, continuing, "Well, you know how much the food sucks here," he barbed weakly.
"Lucas...." she warned. Lucas felt a sense of déjà vu, remembering the Captain using the same tone and words.
"Look, I'm fine, okay? Why don't you all just leave me alone?" he snapped as he pushed himself off the bed in attempt to leave.
He swayed, swearing softly under his breath. He hoped she hadn't seen that.
But she had. And her expression turned from sympathy to concern in an instant.
"Lucas, don't make me order you to stay here," she said softly. She reached out a hand to steady his arm as he walked past.
"I'm fine," he whispered as he shrugged off her help and left slowly.
"I doubt it," she whispered just as softly as the door closed behind the retreating form. "And I bet the Captain doubts it too."
*~*
Tony paced the small confines of the room he and Lucas shared, worried. He wasn't sure when Lucas was due back from the Doctor. Hell, he wasn't even sure if Lucas would come here after he was done.
His questions were answered as the door slid open to reveal a very angry, tired looking Lucas. He glanced up at Tony, his expression shifting to one of regret.
Lucas slid into his bed without a word, turning his back to Tony. Silence echoed throughout the room as Tony tried to decide what to say.
"Luke, we need to talk," he said, finally.
"You and half the ship," a muffled voice muttered. "Just leave me alone, okay? I'm sick of being harassed."
'Harassed? When was he being harassed?' Tony thought bewilderedly.
"You okay there, Luke?" Tony asked.
Lucas stiffened, and slowly spoke out his next sentence, "Yes, what makes you think I'm not?"
"Well, umm.. you seem really angry lately, and you haven't eaten much.." Tony stopped his list as he watched Lucas cringe. "Come on, any fool knows you haven't been eating. Especially me, because I always see you down there playing with your food, or here, refusing to eat."
"And," Tony added softly, "These." He held out his hand to show a few bottles of pills as Lucas turned to see what he was talking about.
All of the blood drained out of Lucas's face as he realized what Tony had found. "Tony, why did you go through my stuff?" he asked, too tired to be angry.
Tony shrugged. "I wanted to clean your side of the room. I thought it'd make you happy. I went to place some stray papers in the desk and when I opened the drawer..." He watched Lucas's expression carefully as it switched from stunned, to regretful, and finally back to angry.
"Well, you shouldn't have done that," Lucas said as he turned back over to face the wall. "I didn't give you permission," he added, softer. "I didn't give anyone permission to care."
"Luke," Tony said. "I am your friend, and as your friend, I am entitled to caring what you are doing to yourself. Now... are you going to explain, or am I going to have to get the Captain on your case to get this resolved?" Tony asked.
Lucas stiffened and turned back, asking simply, "What do you want to know?"
"Everything," Tony decided. "I already had someone else take my shift so we could talk."
Lucas sighed and sat up, facing Tony. Tony cringed inwardly as he noted that Lucas's eyes held none of the usual spark they normally did. They were empty, devoid of life, and full of despair.
"Well..." Lucas began.
*~*
Westphalen sighed, unsure of what to do about Lucas. She paced her office slowly, thinking over the matter.
Finally, she decided to tell Bridger. He appeared in the room a few minutes later, looking quizzically at her.
"What is it? Is it about Lucas?" he asked.
'He is good', Westphalen thought.
"Yes. I just finished examining him," she said quietly.
"And what did you find?" The concern was evident in his voice. 'He really did care about this boy', she marveled. 'And no wonder. They had grown so close of late.'
"He had some bruised ribs. And he isn't eating enough. I tried to get him to stay here, but he refused. I was going to visit him later to check up on him," she concluded.
"Well, I kind of knew about the eating thing... but I didn't know about the bruised ribs. What bruised ribs?" he asked.
"I don't know," she said as she shrugged. "He insists that he doesn't know where he got them from, and refuses to tell me anything else."
"Well, he was on shore leave a few times recently, but I didn't know him wincing or acting like he was in any pain at all when he got back," Bridger replied quietly.
"He's a very quiet boy, Bridger. He probably didn't want anyone to know he was in pain, so he simply refused to show it." She looked at Bridger, noting the concern growing in his eyes.
"Why would he hide something like this?" Bridger asked, the pain evident in his voice.
"I don't know. Maybe he just wanted to not make you worry. And you know how you can worry about Lucas." She laughed softly, but it sounded forced, devoid of any humor. She sighed and continued, "I was going to go see him later. But maybe if you have the time, you can go check up on him now, tell him that I'll be around tonight to see how he is doing."
Bridger nodded. "Of course, I'll go do that. Thank you, Doctor." He turned to leave.
"Captain?" she asked, just before Bridger got to the door.
"Let me know how it goes, okay?" she questioned.
"Will do. Now if you'll excuse me..." With that, Bridger turned and left.
Westphalen sighed and got back to her work, but she found her mind drifted back to Lucas all the time.
'What kind of trouble had he gotten himself in?' she thought grimly.
tbc
If Only Memories Could be Erased As Easily [Chapter 2]
Lucas swung his legs as he sat impatiently on the bed. He asked, "Are you done yet, Doctor?"
"Almost, Lucas," Westphalen replied patiently. She felt along his ribs lightly, surprised when Lucas flinched.
"What do we have here?" she asked, almost to herself as she felt along his ribs again.
"Nothing," Lucas answered defensively. "I probably just hit it against something hard." He combed his fingers through his hair as he avoided her eyes.
"Right," she replied, sounding as if she didn't believe his story for one second. "And why haven't you been eating much, might I ask?" she asked softly.
Lucas shrugged. "You can tell?" He sighed softly, continuing, "Well, you know how much the food sucks here," he barbed weakly.
"Lucas...." she warned. Lucas felt a sense of déjà vu, remembering the Captain using the same tone and words.
"Look, I'm fine, okay? Why don't you all just leave me alone?" he snapped as he pushed himself off the bed in attempt to leave.
He swayed, swearing softly under his breath. He hoped she hadn't seen that.
But she had. And her expression turned from sympathy to concern in an instant.
"Lucas, don't make me order you to stay here," she said softly. She reached out a hand to steady his arm as he walked past.
"I'm fine," he whispered as he shrugged off her help and left slowly.
"I doubt it," she whispered just as softly as the door closed behind the retreating form. "And I bet the Captain doubts it too."
*~*
Tony paced the small confines of the room he and Lucas shared, worried. He wasn't sure when Lucas was due back from the Doctor. Hell, he wasn't even sure if Lucas would come here after he was done.
His questions were answered as the door slid open to reveal a very angry, tired looking Lucas. He glanced up at Tony, his expression shifting to one of regret.
Lucas slid into his bed without a word, turning his back to Tony. Silence echoed throughout the room as Tony tried to decide what to say.
"Luke, we need to talk," he said, finally.
"You and half the ship," a muffled voice muttered. "Just leave me alone, okay? I'm sick of being harassed."
'Harassed? When was he being harassed?' Tony thought bewilderedly.
"You okay there, Luke?" Tony asked.
Lucas stiffened, and slowly spoke out his next sentence, "Yes, what makes you think I'm not?"
"Well, umm.. you seem really angry lately, and you haven't eaten much.." Tony stopped his list as he watched Lucas cringe. "Come on, any fool knows you haven't been eating. Especially me, because I always see you down there playing with your food, or here, refusing to eat."
"And," Tony added softly, "These." He held out his hand to show a few bottles of pills as Lucas turned to see what he was talking about.
All of the blood drained out of Lucas's face as he realized what Tony had found. "Tony, why did you go through my stuff?" he asked, too tired to be angry.
Tony shrugged. "I wanted to clean your side of the room. I thought it'd make you happy. I went to place some stray papers in the desk and when I opened the drawer..." He watched Lucas's expression carefully as it switched from stunned, to regretful, and finally back to angry.
"Well, you shouldn't have done that," Lucas said as he turned back over to face the wall. "I didn't give you permission," he added, softer. "I didn't give anyone permission to care."
"Luke," Tony said. "I am your friend, and as your friend, I am entitled to caring what you are doing to yourself. Now... are you going to explain, or am I going to have to get the Captain on your case to get this resolved?" Tony asked.
Lucas stiffened and turned back, asking simply, "What do you want to know?"
"Everything," Tony decided. "I already had someone else take my shift so we could talk."
Lucas sighed and sat up, facing Tony. Tony cringed inwardly as he noted that Lucas's eyes held none of the usual spark they normally did. They were empty, devoid of life, and full of despair.
"Well..." Lucas began.
*~*
Westphalen sighed, unsure of what to do about Lucas. She paced her office slowly, thinking over the matter.
Finally, she decided to tell Bridger. He appeared in the room a few minutes later, looking quizzically at her.
"What is it? Is it about Lucas?" he asked.
'He is good', Westphalen thought.
"Yes. I just finished examining him," she said quietly.
"And what did you find?" The concern was evident in his voice. 'He really did care about this boy', she marveled. 'And no wonder. They had grown so close of late.'
"He had some bruised ribs. And he isn't eating enough. I tried to get him to stay here, but he refused. I was going to visit him later to check up on him," she concluded.
"Well, I kind of knew about the eating thing... but I didn't know about the bruised ribs. What bruised ribs?" he asked.
"I don't know," she said as she shrugged. "He insists that he doesn't know where he got them from, and refuses to tell me anything else."
"Well, he was on shore leave a few times recently, but I didn't know him wincing or acting like he was in any pain at all when he got back," Bridger replied quietly.
"He's a very quiet boy, Bridger. He probably didn't want anyone to know he was in pain, so he simply refused to show it." She looked at Bridger, noting the concern growing in his eyes.
"Why would he hide something like this?" Bridger asked, the pain evident in his voice.
"I don't know. Maybe he just wanted to not make you worry. And you know how you can worry about Lucas." She laughed softly, but it sounded forced, devoid of any humor. She sighed and continued, "I was going to go see him later. But maybe if you have the time, you can go check up on him now, tell him that I'll be around tonight to see how he is doing."
Bridger nodded. "Of course, I'll go do that. Thank you, Doctor." He turned to leave.
"Captain?" she asked, just before Bridger got to the door.
"Let me know how it goes, okay?" she questioned.
"Will do. Now if you'll excuse me..." With that, Bridger turned and left.
Westphalen sighed and got back to her work, but she found her mind drifted back to Lucas all the time.
'What kind of trouble had he gotten himself in?' she thought grimly.
tbc