Hermione's Revenge
By Wicked_Lady
Disclaimer:
I own nothing. So don't sue.
Feedback
is a wonderful, wonderful drug and I'm addicted. The more the better.
Summary:
Hermione gets sick of Malfoy always teasing her and gets her rather…uhhhh….
shall we say unconventional revenge. Hehehe. R&R at the bottom
please and you'll be invited to the party [you'll understand that later]
Another
day another Care of Magical Creatures class with the Slytherins. Hermoine
grimaced. It wasn't that she didn't like COMC classes; it was just that she
didn't like having them with the Slytherins. They were all such an unbearable
lot. Especially that Malfoy. UGH! How he made her want to scream in
frustration! He was going to get what was coming to him someday, Hermione promised
herself. Lost in her train of thought, someone pushed her to the ground.
"Watch
where your going Mudblood." It was Malfoy. "I don't want to have to touch you
again." The Slytherin girls behind him giggled.
"Well
maybe if you weren't so dense Malfoy you would have seen me." Hermione said as
she got up and brushed herself off. The Gryffindors who overheard laughed. "Now
if you'll excuse me, I have a class to get to. Hermione walked off, well aware
of Malfoy glaring at her behind her back. Hehehe, Hermione: 1, Malfoy: 0.
In
class they were learning about Mugwigs. They were a funny sort of creature,
small, with a brownish hide they looked like dogs that fairly resembled humans.
Like Nifflers, they searched for things using their long snouts to sniff the
objects out, but they weren't limited to gold. Hagrid told them all about the
Mugwigs.
"They
seem like stupid creatures." Malfoy drawled out. "Figures you would pick
something like these to teach us." Hagrid opened his mouth to respond, but
Hermione beat him to it.
"Well,
they can't possible be as stupid and as vapid as you are." She spat out.
"Take
that back Mudblood." Malfoy said, standing up.
"Make
me." She stared him down, looking him right in the eye. They both reached for
their wands when Hagrid jumped in between them.
"Now
I won' 'av any fighting' in one o' my classes. You two will jus' 'av to settle
this some other way." He said, looking at them both. Hagrid seemed to tower
over them both. Slowly Malfoy put away his wand.
"Alright,
a contest then. We'll both pick a Mugwig and whoever picks the one that finds
the most objects wins." Malfoy looked at Hermione, as if to challenge her to
object.
"Fine
then, the loser has to…do whatever the winner says. One task." Hermione crossed
her arms and stared Malfoy down.
"Alright
then." He looked right back.
'Now
I've already hidden objects in preparation for today's lesson, but we can do
this instead." Hagrid smiled. "Pick your Mugwig."
"I'll
have that large one over there. The one that's taller then the others and has
the really long snout." Malfoy pointed to the one he wanted and Hagrid brought
it over.
"What
about you Harm? Which one?" Hagrid looked at her.
"Hmmm….
I guess I'll have the small one over there. The one with the weird eyes."
Hagrid brought over a Mugwig that had large, shifty looking obsidian eyes.
Malfoy and Hermione released their Mugwigs, and waited for them to bring back
stuff. Although Malfoy's Mugwig had the advantage of size, it was it's only
advantage. It was slow, clumsy and stupid, and broke several of the objects, so
they weren't counted. Hermione however, chose wisely. Hers was light, quick and
speedy and in no time she had a pile of stuff before her. At the end of the
lesson Hermione had a small mountain before her while Malfoy only had a few
small objects.
"Ha
ha Malfoy! Looks like you lost!" Ron shouted out.
"Well
I can see that you stupid part!" Malfoy snapped back. Damn…what was he going to
do now? On the same point, what exactly was Hermione going to make him
do? "Alright Granger, what do I have to do now? Let's get it over with."
"No
rush Malfoy, no rush…" Hermione said. What was she going to do with Malfoy? Out
of the corner of her eye she could spot Dean talking off his hat and she
suddenly got an idea. A malicious smile crept onto her face.
"What?
What is it do I have to do?" Malfoy demanded. "I'm not doing anything sexual or
anything like that!" He said in quite a bit of a hurry.
"Don't
worry Malfoy, no sexual favors like that." Hermione laughed. "Just be in the
Great Hall at 7 tonight."
"What
do you want me to do?!" Malfoy demanded a second time. He was getting
impatient.
"You'll
find out tonight." The school bell rang and the students started to go their
separate ways. "Oh, and Malfoy?" She called out after him.
"What
is it Granger?!" Malfoy turned around, his face set in silent fury.
"Just
remember one thing…" She looked at her fellow Gryffindors, who had stopped to
see what she was going to say. "You can leave your hat on…" She sang.
The Slytherin's faces were blank, trying to figure out her 'cryptic' message.
Dean Thomas just laughed and said "Ooo, your evil Hermione!" The Muggle
borns got her message, and the ones who didn't were left wondering. "See you at
7 tonight then Malfoy." Hermione said over her shoulder as she walked away.
"So
what exactly is it that you're going to make the little git do?" asked Ron, since,
him being wizard born, he had no idea exactly what the phrase You can leave
your hat on meant.
"Not
saying."
"But
why? We're going to find out anyways tonight-"
"No
you aren't." Ron stopped dead in his tracks.
"WHAT!
You mean to tell me that I cannot watch my greatest enemy's humiliation?"
"Not
just you, all the boys in Gryffindor. Only girls allowed."
"This
must be some task your setting for him." Harry said, a tad disappointed, but ok
with Herm's decision none the less.
"Yes
Harry, yes it is…" Hermione had a secret little smile and was laughing to
herself as she walked off.
~~~
Later on, at 7 ~~~
Malfoy
stood in the Great Hall, alone, looking up at the starry night above. Dammit!
Where was the little Mudblood! He looked around him, but Hermione was nowhere
to be seen.
"Where
the bloody hell are you Granger!" He yelled out loud.
"Right
behind you, twit." As Hermione said, she was right behind him, flanked on her
right and left by Pavariti and Lavender. One had a blindfold; the other had
Prof. Sprout's earmuffs that blocked out sound. Pavariti grabbed Malfoy and
tied the blindfold on his head.
"What
the-" Malfoy spluttered.
"We're
talking you to the Gryfindor common room to do your task, Hermione whispered into
his ear. "We're just making sure you won't be able to get back in." Hermione then
put the earmuffs over his ears and he wasn't able to hear a thing. The next
thing he saw was inside the common room. The room was filled with giggling
girls, and in the center was a round table and beside it, on a chair, was a
wizard stereo. The girls parted a path for hi and shoved him onto the table.
"You
gotta dance." Hermione said, giggling like mad. Malfoy breathed a sigh of
relief. Thank god he didn't have to do anything such as-
"And
you gotta strip while your doing it."
"WHAT
THE BLOODY HELL!!!!!!!!" Malfoy screamed. He tried jumping off the table, but
he just ended up crowd surfing back on to the table.
"Hey,
it's not anything sexual, you just dancing while taking off your clothes."
Lavender said, laughing like the rest. Hermione pressed the button on the stereo
and a song came on. She pointed her wand at Malfoy and just said "Dance!"
Baby Take off your coat
Reeeeeeeaaaaaalllllll
slow
Baby
take off your shoes
I'll
help you take off your shoes
Baby
take off your dress
Yes,
yes yes
You
can leave your hat on
You
can leave your hat on
You
can leave your hat on…
Malfoy had by this time gotten him robe off. Suprisingly
enough, he was wearing muggle clothes underneath. At the tempo picked up, he
got more unto it, even dancing around a bit. The girls squealed and giggled,
and the guys upstairs just wondered what was going on. Malfoy ripped his shirt
off and twirled it around in the air. Somewhere, a camera flashed, but he didn't
really pay any attention to it. He started to work on his belt…
Go over there
Turn
on the light
No,
all the lights
Come
back here,
Stand
on a chair
Ooo
baby, that's right.
Raise
your arms in the air
Ooo
ooo ooo, now shake em'
That's
right
You
give me reason to live
You
give me reason to live
You
give me reason to live
You
give me reason to liIiIiIiIiIive…
His
belt was now off, and he flung in into the crowd. He was really getting into
this for some odd reason. All that was left now was his pants, shoes, socks,
and well, hopefully for Malfoy, his boxers…or is it briefs? He reached
down, wiggling and dancing, pulled his shoes off, and then his socks, and threw
those off into the crowd. Now he just had to get his pants. He reached down for
the fly…
Suspicious minds are talking
They're
trying to turn us apart
They
don't believe in this love of mine
They
don't know what love is…
He arched his eyebrow at the crowd, as if to tease them.
Then, in one fluid sudden movement, he pulled his pants off and flung those out
too, and the question was finally solved…….
BREIFS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Malfoy
just danced around a bit more, until the song ended. The girls whooped and hollered
and he jumped off the table and landed in front of Hermione.
"Alright
Granger, I did my task, now can I have my clothes and go?" He started to look
around for his clothes when two 6 years suddenly grabbed his arms and held him
tight.
"Ooo,
girls, I didn't know I put on that good of a performance." He said laughing. "Now
let me go."
No
response.
"I
said let me go."
Still
nothing.
"What
the bloody hell is this Granger?" he said, twisting, trying to escape their
grasp, but they held on tight.
"Hold on Malfoy, I'm not done with you yet." Hermione
said, the crowd moving in. Malfoy screamed bloody murder as he was engulphed in
the crowed, but no one heard him over the sound of the girls laughing like mad.
"What
do you suppose they're doing down there with Malfoy?" Ron asked Harry, Seamus,
Dean and Neiville.
"Don't
know." answered Dean.
"Don't
want to know." added Seamus.
"I almost feel sorry for Malfoy…"
Harry mused. Seeing the shocked look on the other's faces he quickly added "Almost!
I said Almost!"
When
the girls let off, Malfoy was left looking… um… rather foolish… hehehe. He had
on a red polka dot dress, underneath that was a stuffed wonder bra. The girls
had put on a blonde wig on him and did his make up to make him look like a
hooker. On his feet were stilettos, at least 4 inches. Someone produced an instant
wizard camera, and took quite a few shots. Hermione took one and walked over to
Malfoy, holding it in her hand.
"Now
Malfoy," she began. " All us girls have promised not to say anything about
tonight under a few… conditions."
"Alright
Mudblood, what are they?"
"First
off, you don't call anyone Mudblood. Or insult us. And stop making fun of Ron's
family. And of Nelville. In fact, don't insult any of us. Or else we'll copy
each and every one of these pictures we took and distribute them around the school.
Can't imagine your father liking that now, hmm? Also, stop trying to frame
non-Slytherins. And if I ever hear about you making one more comment about
Hagrid…" she warned.
"Alright, alright! I get the point! No more fun." Malfoy
grimaced. "Can I go now?" The girls gave him back his clothes, took back the
stuff, washed off the makeup, and let him go. The next day, every time he saw a
female Gryffindor they giggled like mad and started to holler and catcall. Much
to the dismay of the other students, no one would tell what had happened that
night in the Gryffindor common room. And in a little box, up in Hermione's
room, the pictures lay, hopefully, for Malfoy's sake and reputation, never to
be disturbed.
FIN
~~~
AN:
So? What did u think? That little box down there isn't for nothing. R&R, or
I'll set my army of evil squabit's upon you.
