Beep.
Disclaimer: I don't own them,
but you see that text down there? I own that. Yes indeed I do.
And aren't I damn proud.
Title: Perfect
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Shounen-ai/yaoi ahead. If you don't know the term, or
are unsure about it, I mean guys liking guys. Pretty, anime boys
getting all kissy-kissy with other pretty, anime boys. Not your
thing? Then maybe you shouldn't read this. Some Relena-bashing.
Archive?: If you want to, go ahead, but tell me after.
Summary: Heero and Duo are a happy couple, doing the things that
normal couples do, but there's one thing that mars thier perfect
world... It's name: Relena. And now, with a little help from
Dorothy, she's prepared to try a new approach to getting what she
wants... Shounen-ai/yaoi. Reposted with a few corrections.
Perfect
By Hiashi
Beep.
"Heero? This is Relena.
Sorry to call when you aren't home, but I miss you. Seems like so
long, doesn't it? I was thinking, maybe we could get together
some time, maybe get some coffee, or have dinner, or just...
talk. Call back when you can."
Beep.
"You must be really
busy. Did you get my message, or did that idi-- Duo, did Duo
erase it? Well, I still want to see you. It seems like forever
since I've even heard your voice... Please call back."
Beep.
"Heero? Are you there?
Please pick up. ....Duo? Please, somebody
pick up. Are either of you there at all? Goodness, Duo, if you're
ignoring me, I swear, you'll pay. Just... call, Heero.
Call."
Beep.
"Please, please, please
pick up, or answer, or.. something. Heero. Heero! Heeeeero! Duo,
you braided idiot, if this is your fault I will
personally come and rip every hair from your head! Do you hear
me!"
Beep.
"HEERO! HEEEE---"
/CRASH/
"Damn, she just doesn't
give up, does she, Hee-chan?" Duo murmured as he opened a
single eye to glance at the boy who lay, curled up beside him on
the bed. Flexing his arm, he tried to move as slowly as possible
as he retrieved his thrown shoe, with had landed near the
mechanical mess that once was their answering machine.
The other just groaned softly in
assent, not wanting to start off his braided companion on a
free-for-all rant, which could last a good part of the night...
While Duo was a master of many
nightly activities, sleep was not among them.
"I mean," Duo
continued, nudging Heero in the ribs with an elbow, "she
hugs you, what, once? and she thinks she owns you. And then
there's the Teddy Bear thing.. I mean, wasn't your fault the bomb
inside it was a dud."
Another intelligible growl from
Heero. Duo wasn't getting the clue.
"And if she really loved
you, wouldn't she go after you, instead of calli--MMMPH!"
Duo blinked as fierce Prussian eyes met his, set in a
sleep-deprived glare, and his braid magically appeared stuffed in
his mouth.
"Quiet." That was all
Heero had to say; the other simply nodded, and laid back down,
after dislodging his hair from his jaw.
He'd deal with Relena and
Duo tomorrow, if, gods willing, he got a bit of sleep for--
"Heeeeeeero.."
A pair of arms snaked themselves
around the stoic boy's waist, accompanied by a coy whisper.
"I'm not tired yet. Wanna play... Scrabble?" Of course,
it was clear to both that Scrabble had no real part in Duo's
plan.
Well, all right. He'd deal with
Duo tonight, and Relena tomorrow.
Perfect.
------------------------------------
"Pagan... Just a few more
feet forward.. yes... yeeess... No! Go back! ...There.
Perfect."
With a smile dancing over her
lips, Miss Relena Peacecraft, so-called pacifist Queen of the
World, tilted her binoculars upward, twisting the tips of the
lenses to get a better view of what she was staring at so
intently.
It was a rather run-down part of
town, cockroach-infested apartments abound, but popular with
"Duo's crowd", as she usually referred to them when
talking to herself. Namely, those who probably wouldn't live long
enough to get enough money for anything better even if they did
work. Maybe she was being a tad harsh, but it was the truth, in
her eyes, and plus, she wasn't here by choice...
After all, if it weren't for
Heero living with that wretched urchin boy, she wouldn't even
have considered driving here. Why, she couldn't even use her limo
here; Pagan said it would be too obvious next to the grime. So
they'd left in an old, black car of Pagan's, and were off.
Their mission: seek out the
perfect Heero Yuy and free him from the clutches of Satan's
child.
Didn't sound too hard,
did it?
Not for Queen Relena, it wasn't!
"Pagan! He's moving! Quick,
around the corner, there's another window, saw it on the drive
in.."
With a sigh, and a nod, the
butler swerved around the corner, silently sliding into a park so
that his passenger could have full access to the window.
Personally, he couldn't see why she'd bother chasing the boy this
far. If he lived in a place like this, he had to have
issues, or had to be dead poor. Either way, it wasn't a good
thing to be.
"Oooh, there he is, there
he is! I can see him! Still has that tank top; pity, it isn't
nearly as much as a statement after so long." There, in the
window, stood none other than Heero himself. From the sidewalk,
using the naked eye alone, he'd seem a bit blurry, but Relena had
thought ahead; binoculars are beautiful things. She now watched,
hungrily, as his mouth flapped with soundless speech, those eyes
trailing an unseen form, fists clenched in anger.
Who was there with him? In the
back of her mind she knew, but, well, she really wished she
didn't have to be right. Maybe it was... er.. Quatre. Yes,
Quatre. He was a good boy, though she couldn't exactly say how
good, looking at how he acts with that tall friend of his..
Trowa, if she remembers correctly. Wufei? She'd only heard about
him, never seen him, but from what she heard he was a good
fighter, just like her Heero. My, the excitement of it
all! With a smile, she eagerly watched as the other person in the
room stepped into view...
Damn. Damn.
"Look what the cat dragged
it," Relena hissed, and Pagan didn't need to ask what she
saw: Duo, of course. He'd been subjected to her rants on how the
morbid boy was "corrupting" Heero, so he already knew
of her dislike.
Heero glared, and turned,
sharply from Duo, the braided boy just smiling and crossing his
arms over his chest. What an uncaring jerk! Relena
screamed in her mind, her eyes shooting mental darts at a picture
of Duo as she watched. But at least Heero's acting mad. Good
job, my love! You show him! And yes, for a while it did seem
like Heero was mad, even as Duo went over and draped his arms
around his neck, but soon his mood seemed to change. Slowly, that
line of a mouth turned upward into a slight smile, and Heero
turned, quickly capturing Duo in a fast, rough kiss, pulling him
closer by the cross that dangled from his neck.
Relena nearly choked on her own
saliva.
"....Get me.. Pagan, get
me.. out of here..." she moaned, holding a hand over her
mouth.
So, Heero likes bad ones, does
he? Tough? Well, she could be bad, too...
Duo's going to have a little
competition!
------------------------------------
Duo snickered, "I think
she's gone, I can't believe she still..."
------------------------------------
Relena snarled, "Ee!
Dorothy, watch where you're sticking those pins. ...I can't
believe he still..."
------------------------------------
"....thinks you'll come
around...."
------------------------------------
"....thinks he's right for
Heero..."
------------------------------------
"...I mean, look at her!
...."
------------------------------------
"...I mean, look at
him! ...."
------------------------------------
".....One hundred
percent bitch!"
------------------------------------
".....One hundred percent trash!"
Dorothy nodded, silently, and she continued with her
'creating'.
Yes, Duo would have
competition. If anyone knew how to look bad, or at least plain
not very nice, it was Dorothy Catalonia, backstabber
extraordinaire and generally catty mistress. Sure, Relena had met
her while she was acting nice, flitting about at her side and
slowly molding the young Queen into a more befitting vessel for
her own plans, but that had backfired when certain.. problems
came into play.
Problems that piloted Gundams.
More specifically, one Quatre
Winner. Damn that boy to the farthest reaches of holy Hell.
But after laying low through the
whole Marlemaia incident, Dotty had emerged once again, free of
past bonds, and ready to return to her life of subtle
persuasion--- or, she would have, if Relena hadn't scoped her out
as her new 'lady in waiting', so to speak. It had been sudden
indeed, but Dorothy didn't mind helping out Relena, especially
for such an... interesting task.
That task: make Relena look..
er... bad. It was tough, yes, but she tried her hardest.
First order of business was the
wardrobe. All of it. Pink here, pink there, a little white, the
occasional sky blue.. It was sickening. And too little-girlish.
Black velvet cured this.
And the long, flowing dresses,
with bows and ribbons.... Don't think so.
Leather and collars fixed that
quite nicely, as stereotypical as it was. After all, Relena
didn't want to be bad, she just wanted to look it. And she
needed to crop a few... feet from the length on this dresses.
A few tubes of hair mascara,
glitter, and who-knew-whatelse, Dorothy was quite satisfied with
what she had created. Now, to present it...
Relena had the perfect idea. A
birthday party, a big one, but not her own; Duo would probably
hinder her Heero in getting there if it was. No, if she recalled,
Quatre's birthday was coming up. Why, she just got the invitation
last week, and RSVP'd the next day.
Dorothy paled, but Relena just
smirked.
It would be perfect.
Perfect.
------------------------------------
"Bill, bill, bill, credit
card, birthday card... wait.. Damn, no money, bill.. Hey, Heero!
We got an invitation. Lemme guess, Quatre's birthday, and whole
frickin' world is invited. Get out here!" Duo flashed his
widest smile toward Heero as the growling boy loped out into the
kitchen, flopping down at the table and eyeing the scattered
bills that he would have to deal with. Heaven forbid Duo would
help.. He was about as financially minded as a child. Not that
Heero knew a lot about kids, but you can't watch TV without
learning something.
Duo grinned, and ripped off the
top of the letter as unceremoniously as you please, and gave it a
quick scan, with a lopsided grin. "Fancy text. Yep, has to
be one of Quatre's. 'You're invited as one of my dear
friends....' blah blah... et cetera, et cetera... 'dress
formally..' Hey, Hee-chan, no presents needed! Sweet! I'll call
Q-man up right away."
Heero realized right away that
his opinion didn't count, and he just nodded, absently.
So, a party it was. And what a
party, knowing Quatre! But he got a feeling about it, and a bad
one, at that. Quatre knew a lot of people, and among them were
people he wouldn't want to see.
But Quatre was his friend, his
comrade, and Duo was so excited...
Party it is.
------------------------------------
SATURDAY: Quatre's Sister's
Manor:
-
Decked out in white, with a
smile on his face, Quatre stood at the door to the manor, shaking
hands and greeting all of his visitors. A lot were people he
didn't even know; brothers-in-law, nieces and nephews who were
born during the wars, or while he was running from his father.
But as two unrelated boys walked up to the doorway, he instantly
brightened, and dashed over to them.
"Duo! Heero! My
friends!" he greeted, as he hugged them both. Duo smiled
back, and Heero even allowed himself a small smirk; there was
something refreshing about Quatre's cheerful behavior. Perhaps
most of it was thanks to Trowa.. According to the blonde, he'd
finally opened up, and now, as Catherine had put it, they were
officially 'an item'. Of course, he had yet to tell his sisters,
but he hoped to be able to do that after the party. "Trowa
and Wufei arrived a while go. You should go say hi, seeing as I
have to stay here."
"Hey, Q, happy
birthday!" Duo said, with a laugh. "What are you, 16
now?"
Quatre blinked. "I'm 19..
Same age as the both of you."
"Er.. of course, how silly
of me! I'll just.. head inside now.." Duo got a firm grip on
Heero's arm and dragged him inside. Instantly, they were
assaulted by the thick aroma of flowers, and the soft, lulling
sounds of classical music. Ah.. figures. Even if Duo didn't have
much to do party-wise, the spread of food was delicious, a
combination of what the braided boy called 'Quatre food', and
'normal food'. He soon found Hilde, who was also invited, and,
for the first time since he had left the scrap yard to her and
moved in with Heero, they talked. Like friends should
talk.
"Ahem.. Can I have your
attention, please?" Everyone, including a somewhat sickened
Quatre, turned to see the owner of the high, amused voice that
now echoed from the doorway. It didn't take the Duo long to see
what had made Quatre swallow his ginger ale so fast; in the
doorway, which had been opened rather wide, stood none other than
Dorothy, dressed in a slim white dress, a pasty, false smile on
her thin lips.
"Thank you." She gazed
over the room, mentally noting where the pilots were, before she
coughed into her hand, and begun. "I would like to present
to you all... and please, hold your applause *snicker* .... the
new.... Queen Relena Peacecraft!" Contrary to her own
warning, she clapped a couple times, and stepped out of the way.
And then.. she came in..
Quatre fainted.
Wufei, casually sipping his wine
near the fireplace, dropped his glass, pieces scattering at his
feet.
Trowa, of course, didn't show
any signs of caring as he swooped in to pick up Quatre, and bring
him over to a couch to set him down on.
Duo turned around to stifle his
laughter.
And Heero... Well, if he'd been
anyone else, his jaw would've dropped. But, being Mr.
Perfect-Soldier-Yuy, he just.... blinked, and took a step
backwards.
The girl in front of him was not
Relena. It couldn't be.
The girl in front of him didn't
have blonde hair anymore, it had been streaked with red so that
its original color barely showed. The girl in front of him didn't
wear pink, her dress almost sinfully short, fancy necklaces and
bracelets traded for tacky black... things. This girl wore spiked
heels. This girl gave makeup a bad name.
This girl was scary.
Relena was an annoying girl,
yes, but she didn't look like it, at least not like she did now.
She always had a conservative, high-class look to her that made
her bearable. At least usually he could glare at her, or at least
pretend that he cared about her speeches on the good of peace.
But like this...
He didn't want to look at
her like this.
In a lot of ways, she dressed
akin to Duo, with the almost gothic black wardrobe, but the
rest.. it was overkill. She took the look, and killed it.
"Heero!" .....And did
she ever notice it!
Heero watched the sly gleam in
her eyes dim as he stepped away from her, and reached out to
grasp Duo's elbow. Her head swung around, seeking out Dorothy,
and she found the girl laughing behind her hand, eyebrows knit in
a look of devilish delight.
"....Heero?" she
murmured, turning once again toward him, but she received no
comfort there. Yet, as she began to turn, she did feel a hand
touch down on her shoulder to stop her, and, glancing behind her,
it was her turn to be surprised.
It was Duo.
Duo. And he wasn't
laughing, though he did smile; she supposed that was just him,
though.
"Sheesh, girl," he
murmured, so that no one but she and himself could hear him.
"What have you done? But don't worry.." The partygoers
watched, in curious silence, as Duo grabbed Relena's hand, and
motioned to Hilde, who grinned, and likewise dragged along one of
Quatre's sisters she had befriended as she marched after Duo.
The four disappeared upstairs,
and the party commenced as usual, minus a small crowd that tried
to comfort the dazed Quatre.
And, utterly confused, and more
than a bit wary, Heero blinked.
Until things were cleared up,
that was the only rational thing he could think of.
------------------------------------
Heero hadn't said a word all
night. Oh, he'd known it was Quatre's party, and he should be
focused on, but a part of him had expected himself to be
in the limelight. If he'd known Duo, the boy would not waste any
time in hanging all over him, giving him cute, chaste kisses on
the dance floor, popping grapes into his mouth even if he wasn't
hungry. Hell, he wouldn't surprised if Duo was wicked in a waltz.
In a way, loving Duo was like loving a Hollywood star: everyone
was going to find out, eventually, so he was going to make it be
in his own way.
But Duo wasn't here. Duo was
upstairs.
Upstairs with Hilde, Quatre's
sister, and Relena.
And hasn't come down for hours.
It wasn't jealousy, at least not
in the way it could have been. He knew Duo too well to know that
he abhorred girls as lovers, and that his eyes were only for
Heero. But the fact that those girls were spending more time with
him than he, his boyfriend, was.. Heero was jealous. A petty,
stupid emotion, yet there it was, all the same.
So much for training.
"'Scuse me, folks, friends
and family of dear Quatre..." He knew that voice, as it
boomed from the top of the stairwell. The cocky sound to it, with
caring undertones.. It was Duo, no question about it. Heero
quickly following the sound, eyes meeting those of violet, even
from the distance, and he smiled, softly; Duo winked, before
going on. "You've seen her in many live broadcasts, in those
prissy pink outfits.. You may love her, the perfect pacifist
princess, or you may hate her, as a brash, bratty bitch, but
either way, here she is, the new.. new Relena
Dorlian."
The girl who stepped out from
behind Duo, and slowly pawed down the staircase didn't look a
thing like the girl who had walked in hours before, but Heero
could tell it was Relena, simply from the way she carried
herself; even after all that embarrassment, she still walked
upright, and proud. And yet there was a sort of timidness to her
as she moved, which only increased as she stepped onto the first
floor, and paused, awkwardly, to let the guests look at her.
It was obviously something
Quatre's sister had leant to her, the dress, but it fit her
rather well. It was long, trembling at her heels when she
stopping moving, and unlike the first dress it was a pure,
virginal white, lined with gold trim here and there, scarcely
enough so not to be gaudy. The bright color had been washed from
her hair, and it was now its normal blonde, if red-tinted, and
slightly curled and frizzy; the mascara can do that. The heels
had been replaced by a pair of flat slippers, and for jewelry,
she wore a single gold chain.
The party gradually started up
again, and Relena smiled, gliding towards where Duo, Heero, and
Hilde now stood, talking quietly. Duo, as expected, was draped
around Heero's neck already, smiling with pride to shame the sun,
and his mood didn't dampen much as the girl in white approached
them, glancing meaningfully at Heero.
"Heero, I'm..." she
started, and paused, only to continue after Duo cleared his
through. "I'm.. sorry. For the answering machine
messages." Silence; a suggestive cough from Duo.
"...and the spying thing. I'll try to be more.. considerate
next time." Uneasiness set in as Heero didn't reply, and for
a moment, Relena was distraught. What if he didn't forgive her?
For the first time in her life, she was afraid her actions would
be frowned upon by him. All her hard work.. But then Heero did
something that stopped those thoughts. He met her eyes, not a
hint of a glare in them, and smiled.
That was all she needed. The
night was, as she had hoped, perfect.
And, as Duo gently kissed his
Heero on the cheek, causing a few raised eyebrows around him,
they both had to agree, as well.
Perfect.
------------------------------------
Beep.
"Duo.. you there? Please
pick up. I saw you go in. .....Duuuoo!"
Beep.
"Heero? Are you there?
You can't be far from where Duo is, you two cuties, always
together. Well, I was thinking, maybe we three can go out
sometime. There's this wonderful little Italian place that
just opened up nearby. I promise to even consult Hilde before
leaving the house, I swear. Please? Thank you."
Beep.
"DUO! Pick u--"
/BANG/
From beneath the covers of their
bed, Heero let his gun drop to the floor, with a satisfied snort.
"She doesn't give up.." he murmured, with a growl. Not
even a week since the party, and Relena's calls had started
again, but this time asking for them both. It had been
scary enough as it was, but when she started referring to Duo as
'that braided cutie', well...
"Wow, Hee-chan, good
shooting," Duo remarked, ignoring the comments; Heero'd
taken over as the head ranter of the house. "Didn't even
think you had a gun in those shorts. Makes me glad I didn't get
those off of you yet... But, now that you don't need them any
more..."
As said before, Duo was a master
of many nightly activities, even if he still lacked the
basic skill of sleep. But it wasn't like Heero minded. He could
miss a little sleep, won't hurt him...
Yes, there was only one word he
could think of to describe his life...
It was perfect.
------------------------------------
Fin.
------------------------------------
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