Disclaimer: Nothing to see here… move along, move along… They're not mine, or anyone else's except J.K. Rowling. So… on with the show! ~ Zoë.
Zoë: Harry and Ron were being forcibly made to play scrabble by the evil Parry Hotter, who had kidnapped them and was keeping them hostage!
"Oh no!" screamed Ron as Parry placed down "Quivering" on a triple word score. "Only Hermione and her immense vocabulary can save us now!!!"
Sarah: Hermione flew into the room in Superman style.
"Yippy! We're saved!"
"Superhermione to the rescue!!!" Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…
Lizza: She banged into Ron who was already sporting a broken leg, and he was knocked out and carried to the hospital now with 2 broken legs and a broken arm. Unfortunately, Madam Pomfrey is actually Voldemort in surprise so he/she 'accidentally' said the wrong spell and Ron 'unfortunately' died.
Zoë: "For goodness' sake!" shouted Mrs Weasley. "Pull yourself together! Honestly! If you don't, you don't get any pudding for a week!"
Faced with that, the deceased promptly jumped up again.
"Yum! I like treacle tarts!"
Sarah: "I don't."
"I do, I think they taste like heaven."
"Have you ever tasted heaven?"
"No…"
"I'm bored, lets go and play a game of strip Quidditch."
Lizza: Unfortunately, Charlie Weasley then had an unfortunate
accident in which while naked he crashed, and guess how long he lived after he
crashed?
Zoë: He survived! So Ron got to the wedding, he and Hermione were married, and there was shortbread and strawberry milkshake for all.