[Scene 5]
"Link! Link!"
Rousing from his sleep, Link awoke to the sound of his name coming from all directions. It sounded like an emergency, but what could it be? "Maybe they ran out of coffee," he grumbled to himself, and pulled the royal sheets over his head.
Before he could fall back asleep, Zelda burst into the guest room. Link was so startled out of his wits that he jumped out of the bed and brandished a dagger in the Princess's face.
"Oh, will you stop acting crazy, this is serious!" Zelda whacked the blade from Link's hand with her own. "And will you put that blanket down?! Geez, you're not even completely naked, what do you have to hide anyway? Get dressed and get your narrow little butt downstairs. We've got trouble."
Link gave her a puzzled look. "What kind of trouble?"
"Gerudo trouble."
Link was downstairs at the front gate of the palace in five minutes, dressed and ready for the worst. He and Zelda ran towards the town market without hesitation. Even as they approached it, the sound of a large crowd grew louder and louder-something was definitely going on, and it sounded serious.
There was a mob of people waiting for them: Hylians, Gorons, and Zoras alike. They seemed really hopped up over something happening in the centre of town. Struggling to hold on to each other, Link and Zelda crawled and pushed their way through the crowd, sneaking around the adults' legs. When they finally arrived at the front of the crowd, Zelda screamed in terror and fainted into Link's arms. Link himself was frozen in fear. There before them, standing eight feet tall and dressed completely in black, stood the dreaded Ganondorf, King of the Gerudo Thieves...
Selling pies.
Yes, that's right. Ganon was standing proudly in front of a vendor's cart stocked with fresh, warm pies underneath a poorly-made sign: SWEET GERUDO PIE. But the strangest thing of all was the crowd itself. They were not going crazy because of Ganon's presence-they were going crazy for his pies.
"Now, now, everyone," he laughed in a calm manner. "No need to push. There's plenty for everyone! Okay, two for you, sir, there you go. And you, ma'am? Five? Why, certainly, have a nice day now..." As customers walked away with armloads of the steaming boxes, it wasn't long for Ganon to notice the two, immobile children in front of him. But his happy, polite demeanor didn't change at all! "Hey, if it isn't the Princess of Hyrule and the Hero of Time themselves! What a delight that you have graced my presence! Here now, would you like a sample of the infamous Sweet Gerudo Pie? Go on, it's on me!"
By now, Link was able to speak. "Noooo!!" He dropped Zelda and tried to barricade the townspeople from getting too close to the cart. "No! Stop! Don't eat them. There must be something wrong with them--they're probably poisoned! Can't you people smell a trap when you see one...no, wait, that doesn't make sense, now does it?"
"Step aside, brat," a guard snarled as he knocked Link out of his path. He marched straight up to Ganon and thrust four Red Rupees in his face. "Eight!" he snapped.
Ganon let out an uncharacteristically airy laugh. "Eight more? Well, aren't we a growing boy today?"
"Just give 'em to me, dammit."
"All right, all right, no need to get testy." The guard took his boxes of pies and began wading through the crowd. "Out of my way, move!" he roared. The unlucky few who leaned to sniff his pies received a punch in the face. He had polished off three pies by the time he cleared through the people and reached his post.
Link observed all this in shock. He had never even heard of a guard acting so violently. He turned to glare at Ganon. "I don't know what you're up to, but I'm going to put an end to it. You just wait and see!"
Ganon looked at him quizzically and innocently. "What on earth are you talking about, boy? I'm up to what? I don't understand..."
Link, however, didn't hear him. Disgusted, he was already carrying Zelda back to the castle.