Author's notes:
Ookay… This is my first attempt to write a humorous fic, so eh,
Don't… go hard on me…'kay?
Oh… yeah…
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, not even Callo(Melrose), duh!
-Callo(me!)
The simple life…
Chapter one:
The couples
------
Amarant and Lani
~o~
Amarant and Lani are living together in Treno(no kiddin'…), they are not married or anything they are just, together 'n' stuff.
Amarant: Yo, Lani! I'm going to the shop!
Lani: *reading Lord Avon's 'I want to be you canary'(don't ask…)* Hey! Bring me some chocolate, will ya!
Amarant: *stops by the doorway* Chocolate, huh? Lemme guess… menstruation…?
Lani: *stops reading* No… ! I just…
Amarant: *shocked look on his face* Gawd! Don't tell me! Are you… Pregnant??!!
Lani: *really annoyed* Will you go to the fuc**ng shop or not??!!!
Amarant: Shit! You ARE pregnant!! Aww, this ain't good! Man, I'm not a fatherly type-guy…
Lani glares at Amarant.
Lani: Get… going…
Amarant: …But…
Lani: Now!!!
Amarant: Yikes! Sure!! *runs out*
Lani: Dumbass…*continues reading*
~o~
Zidane and Dagger/Garnet/Sarah
~o~
Both of them are sitting in the dining room, having breakfast.
Garnet: Ziddy darling!!
Zidane: Yes, Dagger-poo?
Garnet: Would you please pour me some tea, love…
Zidane: Why yes my honey! *pours Garnet some tea* There you go, sugar…
Garnet: *giggles* Zidane, sweetie… Would you like to have some….
Before Garnet could finish,
Zidane: Yes! I would! *jumps up from his chair* Let's go, to the bedroom!
Garnet: *sweatdrop* Ehm, I meant coffee, Zidane… Not sex…
Zidane: *dull* Oh… *sits down* …okay… sorry… Dagger, would you please give me that hot…
And before Zidane could answer,
Garnet: Zidane! For heaven's sake! Didn't I already tell you that I am not going to sleep with you!!?? *all red from the yelling* … Well, maybe later but… Definitely not now!!!
Zidane:….. Ookay… I got it… Can I have my coffee now…?
Garnet: …..
Zidane: …..
Garnet:….
Zidane:….. You thinking what I'm thinking…?
Garnet: … I think so…
Zidane:… Good, let's go…
Garnet:… Yes, let's go…
They both stand up and leave the dining room.
~o~
Freya and Fratley
~o~
They sit in the balcony of Royal Castle(or whatever…) in Burmecia.
Freya: I say Fratley… It sure is beautiful, don't you think…?
Fratley:Uh-huh…
Freya: Indeed! It's been a long time since I saw the sun shine so beautifully in here…
Fratley:Uh-huh…
Freya: I wonder what are my friends doing?
Fratley:Uh-huh…
Freya: They're all probably living their lives, except Vivi, with their loved ones…
Fratley:Uh-huh…
Freya: Oh, and did I tell you about the time when we were in Memoria? That sure was dangerous…
Fratley:Uh-huh…
Freya: I didn't?! Good, wanna hear?
Fratley:Uh-huh… …!!! I mean no!!! No!! You already told that!!
Freya: I did?! Gosh, well… Did I tell you about that time when I first met Amarant? He was so arrogant and rude, jeez!
Fratley: …… About a hundred times…
Freya: I did?!?! Whoa! Well, did I tell you when I was…
Fratley: Hoo boy… I wish I'd had that amnesia right now…
~o~
Steiner and Beatrix
~o~
Steiner is standing outside of Garnet's room. He has his ears covered with his hands.
Steiner: #%&¤¤##%&/!! I cannot understand that why the hell do I have to guard the door to Her Majesty's room! I wanted to take the patrol, but no! 'Steiner is the perfect man to do the guarding' , bullshit… I want to patrol!!! Now it's even worse when that monkey boy wanted to have sex with Her Royal Highness…
The reason why Steiner had his ears covered, what quite obvious,
Inside Garnet's room: OH MY GOD ZIDANE!! DEEPER!! HARDER!!! FASTER!!! AH! IT'S AN ORDER YOU HEAR!! AAAH!!
Steiner: … Lord have mercy on me… And Her Majesty… If she survives…
Beatrix comes to see how her love is doing on the job,
Beatrix: Why hello there Steiner… *hears THE voices* Um, Queen Garnet and Zidane, I presume…
Steiner: *nods* Who else…
Beatrix: Well, it could be us… *winks*
Steiner: *blushes* Er, do you think so…?
Beatrix: *giggles* Yes, I do think so..
Steiner: Uwaoo! Oh thank you! *kneels in front of Beatrix* I've waited so long for you to say that!!
Beatrix:… *sweatdrop* … Oh, really…
Steiner: Let's go! Let's go! Let's goooo~!!! *jumps up and down, making his armor clatter*
Beatrix: Maybe in the evening… When you've got rid of that awful armor of yours… Then I could fu** you… *walks away*
Steiner: … Yes… Yes! YES!!! I can fu** Beatrix! I can fu** Beatrix! Yeah! I can- Hey! What did she mean that I'd have to get rid of my armor…? Why on earth I'd have to do that? My armor makes me look masculine and sexy… *straightens his back* Soooo, sexy…
~o~
… That's that…
Next chapter will be about the singles…
*sigh* This ain't working ….
*sits on the floor and covers her face with her hands*
Go away please…
-Callo(Me!)