Ch.6- The Going away Ball
She glanced at me and whispered "Isn't he handsome?"
I snorted. "Whatever you say Kal."
"Come on Lark. We have got to get you a crush of your own. I swear, you're like the ice woman. How about that Joren of Stone Mountain? He danced with you at the Midwinter balls."
I shook my head. "Look Kally. Do we have to talk about this? It's so dismal. That's the last thing I need right now." I told her and meandered on. Every girl in the Princess's Elite had a crush. Watching my friends lament and sigh and whisper jovially only made my melancholy mood deepen. Finally after an hour of the giggles and whispers I went outside onto the terrace to escape the joyful atmosphere.
I know I sound really pathetic, don't I? I like being happy go lucky just as much as the next girl, but sometimes I get so sick of it. Don't they realize this isn't real life? Being happy all the time? It isn't natural. You can't be happy all the time. There is plenty of sadness and pain in the world and you just can't ignore it and pretend that it isn't there so you can be happy nonstop. What does this have to do with my friends' crushes?, you ask. A lot. People always say they're looking for the person who will make them happy. But I say, why depend on someone else to make you happy? And why do you need another person to fulfill that wish? I think that's why when someone dies, the person who loved them the most is sooo devastated. Because they were depending on this person to make them happy and now they don't know how to make themselves happy. Finding someone you want to spend your life with is great. But when you say "They're going to make me happy" you have to realize that they may not always be around, and you won't always be happy. Look at my parents, is my mother ever happy? Does seem that way, but yet my father never has a frown on his face.
I was hoping that the terrace would be empty, but I was let down. There was a single man standing by the railing, looking over into the garden below. He turned and I recognized him as Joren of Stone Mountain. He smiled and said hello. I said hello as well.
"What are you doing out here?" he asked.
"Well, I was going to jump, but I wouldn't want to disturb you," I said sarcastically.
"Who has driven you to jumping?" he asked.
"Just about everyone. Would you like some of the blame as well?"
"Why not? I could use some guilt. You go ahead and jump and then I can blame myself for not stopping you." We laughed at our retarded conversation.
"Nah. I wouldn't have the nerve to jump anyway," I admitted.
"I could help you," he said jokingly.
"Why are you out here?" I asked, changing the subject.
"Avoiding people. Saving your life," he replied.
"How did you save my life?" I asked, bewildered.
"You were going to jump weren't you? And you didn't because you didn't want to disturb me."
I laughed. I liked this Joren. I wonder why Neal hates him, he seems really nice.
"You never specified who had driven you to jumping," he reminded me.
"My friends." I said honestly.
"Some good friends, trying to make you kill yourself."
"They weren't trying. It's just I'm so tired of hearing them weep over their crushes. Know what I mean?"
"I know exactly what you mean."
"I hate how they're so.."
"Happy." Joren finished my sentence for me. I nodded. "Gets annoying. People always having crushes. I confess I don't understand it. Most crushes aren't even real love. If it was the real thing, you know, love, then it wouldn't be so annoying," he added.
"I agree! I hate crushes. It's like they're playing down real love."
"Like some cheap imitation of love. That's what crushes are."
I gasped. I thought I was the only one who thought that way! And I told him so.
"And going from one person to another! I think if it was real love than it should be with one person, not drifting from one pretty face to the next," I attached my opinion.
"It's so weird that we both think that. I've never known anyone who agreed with me on that." Joren told me.
"Same here," I murmured. "Just look at my brother Neal. I can't stand the way he goes from one girl to another, like they were.."
"Play toys," Joren finished my sentence with the exact words I was going to use.
"I know it's going to sound really hypocritical when I say this but.." he trailed off.
"I think I have a crush on you!" we said in unison, then burst out laughing.
"I've never met anyone like you Lark. It's so cool to have someone who has so much in common with me," Joren spoke very softly.
"I know." I answered.
"Can you face your friends inside long enough to dance with me?"
"If not, you can save my life I again I quess." I told him.
Authors note: I think this was better than the last chapter. I apologize for using the word "happy" so much. Please review. Wait! What are you doing? You're about to click on the X but you haven't reviewed yet! See the little box?! (points frantically, then while throwing self on ground and wrapping arms around your ankles, refuses to let you move before you write in the little box.)