Sailor Funnies
By: Lil Minako
Authors Note: OK. This really should be PG-13. But if your younger then I don't care
Just review, I might make a sequal. I just wanted to tell you that I was half asleep when
I wrote this. Feel free to flame me, but not to much. I burn easily. OK some sad attempts
At joke's and other stuff. Remember, BE NICE! Ja ne!
Disclaimer: No I don't own sailor moon, only this story. I you want to borrow something
From it, ask me first. Did my point come across clear??
Rini walks across the stage and sits in a big, black, leather couch. "Hello all!" Silence.
She looks around confused. Then she hears the director, "Umm, sorry, that applause sign
went out. We sent the coffee boy to Home Depot (did I spell it right?) to get a new light
bulb" Rini slapped her hand on her forehead. "That's what I get for using the cheap brand,
anyways. On with the show!" Silence, only one person was clapping. *clap, clap clap*
"Yes! I killed the fly!" She rolled her eyes, "Anywayz….we have come here to witness
some sailor funnies. They consist of MST, only part of them, bloopers, and home videos.
The first is a MST (part of one)
Serena sat under a tree staring at her test score. Suddenly, Luna popped up.
Luna: where did I pop out of?
Serena: don't ask
Luna stared up at Serena, "Alright, what did you get?"
She shoved her paper in her face, "I got a 69!?!"
Darien: what I wouldn't give for a 69
Serena: you had on last night muffin
Mina: what's 69?
Darien: It's when you…
*Slap*
Darien: unconscious on the floor:
Luna: it's a perfect E, hehe, umm ya
Serena: Mina, you take the dumb blonde thing to a whole new level
Mina: is that good?
Rini: This next is a home video. Hey author person, change the font, I don't like this!
Author: O.o???me?? Err, okay. Anything in bold is the funny,the rest is how the audience
Responds to it, that means you!
Audience: who me?
Author: yes you!
Audience: couldn't be!
Author: than who?
A homeless man runs onstage.
Man: I'm sorry! I stole the cookie from the cookie jar! *evil laugh*
Security comes and takes him away.
Rini:can we go back to the funnies?
Rini: this is what happens when you separate education from Ami
Ami:*rocks back and forth with blood shot eyes*
Psyciatrist: Ami? What's wrong?
Ami: mu….must…have…educa..education! Die summer break die!!!
Psychiatrist: well, from your symptoms, I say your going through…….
Ami: learning withdrawl
Psychiatrist: have you thought of summer school?
Ami: got kicked out
Psychiatrist: how about a year round school?
Ami: they say I'm to freaky
Psychiatrist: why is that?
Ami: I was seeing the average length. I would hide in boys locker rooms.
Psyciatrist:*blink*
Ami: what?! The average is about 6 ½ inches, but now a days only god knows how long.
Psyciatrist:*blink*
Guy from audience: I'm 7 inches!
Guy b: So! I'm 7 ½!
Guy c: I'm 9 inches!
Silence.
A whole lot of girls start running to him.
Girls: AHH!! He's Mine!!!!
Guy c: get away!!!
Rini: *squrming in her seat* Umm, ugh! Forget it! *runs to guy* I get first dibs!
Mina talking with a hott guy in a speedo. Just then, something real long, about 12 inches
Catches her eye, and makes her mouth water.
Rei: 12 inches!
Lita: now that's just plain NASTY!
Ami: highly abnormal
Darien: is this a lemon?
Serena: Ahh! A lemon!
Girls: *covers eyes*
Trista: pops up I like lemons! bites into a lemon
Darien: not that kind….
Trista:*smiles evily* I know….
Mina quickly runs to…a hot dog stand. They are selling foot long hot dogs for half price.
All: *sweatdrop*
Rini:*walks back to her seat a little dizzy* Blooper…
Serena and the girls run to each other and stand shoulder to shoulder.
"Moon Crystal Power! Make-up!"
"Venus Star Power! Make-up!"
"Mars Star Power! Make-up!"
"Jupiter Star Power! Make-up!"
"Mercury Star Power Make-up!"
They start spinning.
*Bash*
*Uuf!*
Mina flips backwards and lands on her face with a foot mark on her chin. Director
turns on loud speaker,"Serena, how many times do I have to tell you! Loos before you
kick!" Serena blushes, "Ya, sorry,it wont happen again I promise.I mean it this time, the
other five times wernt promises!"
--.--;;;
(Home video)
Mina: *running around after Serena with a video cam*
Serena Guess what *talking to Steve and Matt*
Mina:*hides in a bush*
Guy from audience: Has anyone heard of Macy Gray??is that her name?? (if you don't get it than
to bad)
Audience:*rotfl*
Steve and Matt: what?
Serena: I can bend in ways you cant imagine!
Steve: Oh shit..
Matt:*faints*
Mina:*turns video cam to her* I taught her all she knows!
(Home Video)
Serena(wearing a super short skirt)*walks to a pull string stuffed animal*
Guy: *walks right behind her*
Serena: *reads tag aloud* Pull my string
*pull, tug*
*pop!*
Serena:*quickly turns around* eechi!!!
Guy:o.o????
Serena: *grabs tampon out of his hand* I need that! *runs to bathroom*
Guy: *blink* *turns to sales clerk*
Clerk: o.o????
Guy: What?! She said pull my string!!!
(Home Video)
(Serena and Mina have a job at the day care center, and gives the kids lesson on counting in
Another language. ~~just to help you out)
Kid a: they didn't give us our lesson today!
Kid b:ya! Lets protest!
All the kids: we want a counting lesson! We want a counting lesson!
Serena and Mina: we have been living for 16 years, we want one to! You don't see us
Complaining! (if you don't it, to bad)
Kids:o.o??????
Serena: errrr, ummm, forget we said that
Mina:your too young to understand.
Rini:welll that's all we have today folks! Come back next time. If there is a next time!!
DON'T FLAME MUCH, I BURN EASILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!