"Never Let You Go"
By Wilted Rose
As the sun rose over the hills of Balamb, Rinoa Heartilly opened her eyes as the faint sunbeams hit her in the face through the blinds of her dorm. "What a beautiful day," she thought as she stretched and looked out her window. The plains of Balamb never looked so green and lush. In the distance, the little town of Balamb never looked so brimming with activity and contentment.
"Heya!" It was Selphie Tilmett; she occupied the dorm next to hers.
"You're really awake this morning," Rinoa said as she met up with her perky friend, who was skipping down the halls alongside her.
"Well, ya know, it's "all you can drink expresso morning" in the cafeteria today. So well, ya now. Ha ha! I tried to make the most of it. Ya know. And I think it's working don't you..i really think so…ya know? Well, I'm going to get more coffee later…are you? 'Cause I am…ya know?" Selphie started to ramble really fast as she skipped.
"Selph, uh…you should stay off the caffeine today. You're starting to sound like Raijin"
"Whatever do you mean?"
"Never Mind."
They entered the cafeteria, which was full of hungry students waiting for their morning fix. Rinoa saw Zell and Irvine sitting at a table. She sat down at an unoccupied seat next to Zell, who was stuffing his face with Hot Dogs.
"Zell, isn't it too early for Hot Dogs?"
"Wope," the blonde haired boy said with his mouth full.
"HEYA IRVY!!!" Selphie jumped into the seat next to Irvine.
"Hey Babe!" Irvine said back as the two shared an Eskimo kiss.
"Hey, that reminds me, where's Squall?" Rinoa asked the three other people at her table.
"I wunno," replied Zell still stuffing his face silly with hot dogs.
"Beat's me," both Irvine and Selphie said in unison and then shared a laugh and another Eskimo kiss. Rinoa looked at the clock on the wall. It was 8:30, knowing Squall, it was way too late for him to be still sleeping.
"I better go find him before…" she stopped herself abruptly for she realized that none of the other people at the table were listening. Zell was still stuffing his face with hot dogs (when does his supply end?) and Selphie was sitting on Irvine's lap as they were making out. With those last observations, she left the cafeteria and headed for Squall's dorm room.
***
She met up with Squall as he was leaving his room. He shut door and turned around to see Rinoa's face.
"Oh hey babe," he said to her in a slight monotone.
"Morning! Why were you in so late?" she asked her love.
"Oh…I had a hard night," Squall replied ruffling his hair. "Irvine and Selphie have to keep it down."
"Oh…Well, let's go get some breakfast!" Rinoa hooked her arm around Squall's as they walked. She tried to create some conversation.
"Its such a beautiful day today…" she said with a sigh.
"I guess…" Squall replied looking down at his black boots.
"Let's have a picnic or something today. It's just the day to have one. Don't ya think?"
"I guess…" he said again. Rinoa bit down on her lip. It was so hard to get Squall engaged in a conversation these days. He seemed more distant than usual. "Is there something wrong babe?"
"Huh?" She has seemed top have gotten lost in her thoughts. "Oh, I'm great. So, what do you say, a picnic?"
"I'll think about it, I might have plans." Plans? When was the last time Squall had plans? And on a Saturday!!
"What plans? It's a Saturday."
"I dunno, being a commander and stuff. Things just come up."
"Whatever," Rinoa thought to herself.
After they got their food, they sat down on two chairs next to each other adjacent to Selphie and Irvine, who were finished with their little "Mack Session."
"Heya Squall!" Selphie exclaimed with her signature wave.
"Hey," he responded as he drank his orange juice.
"Sorry to keep you up last night, Squall. Me and my Selph-ikins were you know…" Irvine said as he and Selphie chuckled and shared yet another Eskimo kiss. Rinoa looked at the infatuated couple as they laughed and shared Eskimo kiss after Eskimo kiss. She wondered why she and Squall never did any of that sappy lover stuff, which she adored by the way. She looked over at her boyfriend who was silently eating his Wheaties, staring at the wall in front of him.
The Clock struck nine and the cafeteria slowly emptied. Squall and Rinoa headed off together down the halls.
"So where are you going now?"
"I dunno, back to my dorm to stare at the ceiling, think about stuff.."
"If you're going to do nothing, you might as well go on that picnic with me."
"I dunno, something might come up."
"Can I at least go stare at the ceiling with you?"
"Well, I'd rather not have you in my room while I think."
"Oh." Rinoa was very disappointed. He didn't even want to do the slightest activity with her. Even though he was in so-called love, he was still inside his Lone-Wolf shell. Selphie skipped pass .
"Oh I gotta go talk to Selphie. See ya at lunch!"
"Okay. See ya," Squall said in an all out monotone. Rinoa and caught up with Selphie.
"I really have to talk to you," Rinoa told her friends as she walked alongside. Her eyes seemed to fill with tears as she said those words. Ashamed that she was crying in public, she hid her face in her hand and attempted to wipe all the tears away. Selphie stopped skipping and started to walk at Rinoa's gait, putting a comforting arm around her.
"We'll talk when we get to my dorm."
***
"What's bothering you?" Selphie asked as they entered the room. She opened the blinds, lighting the dark dorm. "…You're not pregnant are you?!"
"Of course not!" Rinoa blurted out. Tears were still streaming out of her eyes. Sitting on Selphies's bed, she wiped her eyes with the ends of her blue over coat-thingy. "It's Squall," she uttered through her painful tears. "He's been so distant lately. It doesn't even seem we're together. He never seemed less in love." Selphie handed her a tissue and she blew her nose. "I always knew this day would come."
"What do you mean?"
"I always knew that Squall was too dull for me, but I don't want to break it off already, I still the guy. Nowadays, it seems like I'll have to." Rinoa pulled her knees up and hugged them like she always did. "He hardly ever talks to me. He pushes out his plans so he can stay in his dorm doing nothing. Its horrible."
"Well, Squall doesn't talk that much to a lot of people, everyone actually."
"But of all people to ignore, his own girlfriend. The same person he told that he loved so many times."
"Well, Let's just say that Squall loves in a different kind of way."
"What way would that be?"
"I dunno. Maybe someday you'll find out."
"I never pictured our relationship to ever break down to this."
"How did you think it would be like."
"You know, he'd always hold me and give me Eskimo kisses and real kisses." Rinoa entered her "dreamy-sparkle- sparkle" look as she talked to Selphie. "We'd go on nice dates, You know that whole sappy lover thing."
"Don't you guys do anything together?"
"Not really. He always has to go stare at the ceiling. I would still be happy with spending all night in his dorm watching kung fu flicks. But he never even wants to do anything like that."
"Hmm…I see," Selphie said as she rubbed her chin.
"How do you and Irvine do it?" Rinoa asked.
"What?"
"How do you and Irvine stay so in to each other? Whenever I see you two, you seem so in love."
"I dunno…" Selphie answered as she looked down at her feet and blushed a little. "Well, that's probably because we are in love, I guess."
"Are you saying that me and Squall are not in love?"
"…. Uh…I dunno." Selphie was still looking down at her feet. Rinoa had a worried look on her face. She fell back flat onto her back, and rolled into fetal position.
"Selph…I think you may be right," Rinoa said as she broke into tears.
* * *
It was dinnertime, around 6:00. All the students of Balamb garden entered the cafeteria waiting for a warm meal. Rinoa sat still at her usual table, holding her head. Her eyes were red from crying so much. She had been sitting there since lunch at 12. Of course, she had been waiting for Squall. Selphie and Irvine sat down with her.
"Rini, you don't look too good…you're all pale and your eyes are all red," Selphie pointed out. "You should go to bed early today," she added.
"Don't worry, I'm fine," Rinoa uttered as she rested her head on the table.
"Aren't you going to eat something?" Selphie asked with concern.
"I'm not hungry."
Zell sat down with his usual tray of hot dogs, and as usual, started to stuff his face.
"Zell, where's Squall?" Rinoa inquired.
"Can't talk, eating," replied Zell between hot dogs. Rinoa still sat there inanimate as a rock. She was really pissed off right now. Finally, Squall sat down with a bottle of "Centra Cola." She felt so angry at that moment.
"Squall where were you?!" she blurted out, "I've been sitting my ass here since 12!!" Squall took a sip of his soda.
"Oh, Ma Dincht was having a Barbecue. Zell invited me."
"Were those hot dogs the best hot dogs you ever ate or what?!" Zell shouted with his mouth full.
"Well, I dunno. You ate all of them and left me with a bun."
"Oh sorry.. haha!"
"Excuse… me…" Rinoa had never felt more angry at a single person in her whole entire life. She stood up and started to breathe really long and hard.
"I went to a Barbecue with Zell, babe," he answered and calmly took a swig of his soda.
"AHHH!!! I…HATE YOU!!!" Rinoa exploded right before everyone's eyes. Squall dropped his bottle and it spilt everywhere on the floor. His eyes were nailed to the angry girl in front of him.
"Are you okay honey?"
"WHAT DO YOU THINK!!!" Her sudden outburst of anger made everyone jump back. Even Zell, who had stopped stuffing his face with hot dogs. "YOU BLEW OFF OUR PICNIC TO GO EAT HOT DOGS WITH ZELL? SQUALL, DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT ME?!!!?!!" With that, Rinoa kicked her chair out of the way and ran out of the cafeteria.
"Oh God! Rinoa come back!" Selphie started to run after her. Squall still had his eyes on the metal chair, skidding across the tiled cafeteria floor.
"You really did it this time…" Zell acknowledged his friend as he continued to eat.
"For once, I am utterly speechless," Irvine said, still having his eyes on the chair that laid across the room like Squall. Selphie returned with a sympathetic expression on her face.
"I lost her. I don't know where she went." All eyes now fell upon Squall who was holding his face in his hand.
"Oh no…" he thought to himself.
* * *
"We are now about to embark on a really serious mission," Squall said as he looked over the other three people in his dorm room. "Operation, Find Rinoa." There was a map of the whole garden behind him. "Judging by the shoes that Rinoa was wearing at the time of her flee, she couldn't have left the garden," Squall said very, "matter of factly." He took a pointer and zipped it towards Zell. "Zell, you have the job of looking in the South side of the Garden. That includes the front gate and Balamb."
"Aww…man! Can't I look in the cafeteria or something?"
"Zell, I think you have eaten enough hot dogs today, and why would Rinoa be in the cafeteria if she ran way from there in the first place!"
"Okay, Okay , Okay! Jeez Louise!" Squall zipped the pointer over to Selphie.
"Selphie you cover the North. That includes Rinoa's dorm, 2F classroom, and that balcony place that's close to 2F Classroom."
"Okee Dokee Artichokey!!" She said as she did a little salute. He then zipped the pointer to Irvine.
"Stop with the pointer thing. Its annoying!" Irvine exclaimed as he hit the pointer away from his face.
"Sorry…Well, Irvine, you are responsible for the West Side of the Garden. That includes the basement and Headmaster Cid's office. Though I doubt that she'd be in there, so I wouldn't bother looking. So just search the Infirmary, Quad, and every nook and cranny of the basement."
"Gotcha."
"I'll take the East Side. Any questions?"
"Uh…can I stop for hot dogs before I search?" Zell asked, scratching his blonde little head.
"NO!" everyone shouted in unison.
"Well I was just asking."
* * *
The search so far had been grueling. Squall had searched behind every book in the whole library!! Still, Rinoa did not come up. He was now busy searching behind every plant in the East Side.
"Rinoa!!" He shouted behind the plant. No answer came back.
"What in the hell are you doing, puberty boy?" Oh god, it was Seifer.
"I'm looking for….hey, where did you get that hot dog! The cafeteria's closed!"
"I dunno, I took it from that chickenwuss, Zell. He had a whole bunch of 'em."
"Oh god, Zell." Squall thought, he felt a very bad headache come on. "Well, anyway…gotta fly!" he said as he sped towards the Training Center. On his way there, he ran into Zell sitting on a bench doing what else but eating hot dogs. "Zell! You're supposed to be looking for Rinoa!"
"I am," Zell muttered as he choked down another hot dog. "I'm looking and seeing if she's in between these hot dog buns. "Rinoa?!!!" He shouted into the bun not realizing how dumb he really looked.
"Well, promise me that when you're done, you'll look for Rinoa."
"Okee!!" Though he was doubtful that Zell would even try to look for her, he sped off towards the Training Center.
* * *
The search in the training center was more grueling than he had ever imagined it to be. He had asked every Grat if they knew where Rinoa went, and every time, he'd end up fighting them. Finally, he realized that asking Grats wasn't a good idea.
"This is horrible." Squall thought as he sat against the wall, with his eyes closed. "Oh god Rinoa, If I could apologize for everything I've done…I'm so sorry. Some how I'll make it up to you."
A few hours had past, Squall was feeling very pessimistic over ever finding Rinoa, his true love.
"This is the last place I'll look in this wretched Center," he thought as he walked towards the "secret area.."
"Rinoa are you here?" He scanned the whole balcony searching for the girl he couldn't wait to have safe in his arms again, and there she was, sitting on the floor. One leg was straight and the other was bent up, her head was rested on her bent up leg. She hid her face with her hair and arms. She obviously had been crying. "Rinoa?" Squall bet down on one knee, gently shaking Rinoa, who seemed to be sleeping. After a few seconds, she seemed to stir a bit. She lifted her head to reveal a very pale and tired face.
"What do you want?" she murmured hoarsely and sourly.
"Baby, I'm sorry…Rinoa?"
"Go away, meanie." She looked away coldly.
"Babe, I'm sorry. I should of went on that picnic with you. Please, at least stand up and look me in the eye." He stood up and gave a hand to her. She looked up him and placed a shivering hand into his warm grasp. Squall then helped her stand up. Even as she stood up, she pushed him away.
"What do you think I am," Rinoa leaned over the railing and looked over the whole Garden. She then looked over back at Squall. "What do you think I fuckin' am!!! A House plant?" Overwhelmed by emotion, she burst into tears. Squall took her shivering body into his arms. "I need you more than just a while…"
"I need you too. I need your smile, you mustn't cry."
"Oh Squall, haven't you noticed that our relationship is going downhill?" She pushed herself out of his embrace and turned around, still crying. Squall removed his jacket and wrapped it around Rinoa's shaking body and hugged her shoulders.
"In fact I have. But that's just how I am. I can't help it. I know I haven't been spending that much time with you lately, and for that I'm sorry. I guess, I'm not used to it. I'm not used to having someone that actually wants to spend time with me." Rinoa looked over her shoulder to see Squall resting his head on it, his wisps of golden brown hair blowing in the wind.
"Oh Squall!" She turned around and fell into his embrace once more.
"I'll never let you go Baby."
"Neither will I…" He leaned his head close to hers, so they were forehead to forehead.
"Tomorrow, We'll go on that picnic, and after that, we'll do anything you want to…" With a gloved hand, he wiped a tear from her face…
"Oo, I can't wait."
~ So, how was it? Please, Please, Please, Please review Please!!! Just as my other fic was, it was based on a song. This one was based on "Never Let You Go" by Double Joy also from mp3.com. Well, this goes out to Joanne: doesn't Squall in this fic remind you of a certain someone? Hehe.. Please review!