Disclaimer: None of the
characters in this story belong to me, except Liv. If you haven't read two of my other fanfics, namely
"Barricade" and "Simply Unpredictable," this story might be
a little confusing to you. Read on,
intrepid souls.
[Scene:
The Oval Office]
[Josh,
Donna, Charlie, President Bartlet]
[Bartlet
is sitting behind his desk, reading glasses on, looking over a piece of paper
in his hand. He looks amused, but also
looks as though he's trying to hide the fact that he's amused. Josh and Donna approach the open door; Josh
knocks perfunctorily and they enter.]
Josh:
Good morning, Mr. President.
Donna:
Good morning, sir.
Bartlet:
[removing his reading glasses] Good morning.
[He hands Josh the paper and stands, watching them with a slight smile. After a moment, Josh begins reading.]
Josh
[reading]: Dear Mr. President, we're not sure you'll get this letter, you
probably get about a thousand letters a day, but we're writing in hopes that
just maybe ours will go through. [Looks
up.] Sir, what is this?
Donna:
I'm pretty sure you'll find out if you keep reading.
Josh;
The suspense is killing me.
[Reading.] Since you invited us
to your fundraiser last year in Baltimore, which, by the way, was very nice of
you, we thought we'd invite you to a get-together we're having in honor of the
3rd anniversary of our show… [pauses, smiles] Sports Night. [Donna
chuckles.] Of course, you can bring whomever you like, you being the President
and all. We don't really expect you to
even get this, so we'll be surprised but terribly honored if we see you
there. The information is at the bottom
of the page. Yours respectfully, Casey
McCall and Dan Rydell.
Bartlet:
One of the people who read my mail thought this would amuse me. I have to admit she was right. [Josh hands him back the letter, and he
walks over to the window.] However, I
very much doubt I will be in attendance.
Donna:
At least they were polite, sir.
Bartlet:
Oh yes. You've met these people,
correct?
Josh:
Yes, sir.
Bartlet:
I do like their show. It's
entertaining.
Donna:
So are they, sir.
Bartlet:
Is that right?
Donna:
They're very unusual.
Bartlet:
Why does that not surprise me?
Josh:
Do you want me to tell them you won't be coming, sir?
Bartlet:
I think you should go in place of me.
We'll see if Leo can't give you up for a night.
Josh:
That's… very nice of you, sir.
Bartlet:
That letter put me in a good mood, I'm gonna try and be amused for the rest of
the day.
Josh:
That might be hard with your schedule.
Bartlet:
Naysayer.
Donna:
Go for it, sir.
Bartlet:
I will, Donna, I will. [Bellowing.]
Charlie!
[Charlie
enters.]
Charlie:
Yes, sir?
Bartlet:
I want you to keep in mind that I am going to be amused for the rest of the
day, so if I say something particularly witty, don't be surprised.
Charlie:
I never am, sir.
Bartlet:
I don't pay you to suck up to me, Charlie.
Charlie:
I'm not sure that's true, sir.
Bartlet:
You're probably right.
[Scene:
In the hallways of the West Wing {I don't know if there's a technical term for
this}]
[Sam,
Josh, Donna, Ginger, the usual bunches of people in the hallways]
[Josh
and Donna are heading away from the Oval Office.]
Josh:
I'm looking forward to this, they're sports guys, they'll probably have, you
know, cool sports people there.
Donna:
That would stand to reason.
Josh:
That probably doesn't excite you.
Donna:
Not as much as the prospect that there may be cheesecake.
Josh:
That's sad.
[Sam
crosses in front of them.]
Sam:
Hey, guys.
Josh:
Hey, Sam. Hey, guess where we're going?
Sam:
Your office?
Josh:
No, in a week and a half.
Sam:
Madagascar.
Josh:
Not quite.
Sam:
Because I remember something about Leo saying that if you didn't get out of his
hair, he would personally ship you to Madagascar.
Josh:
I thought he was talking to Margaret just then.
Sam:
No, he was talking to you.
Josh:
Huh.
Donna:
I'll give you a hint.
Sam:
I'm all a-twitter.
Donna:
It's in this country.
Sam:
That narrows it down.
Josh:
New York. Do you know what we're going
to do there?
Sam:
Ice skate in Rockefeller Center?
Josh:
You're really not into this whole 'guessing' thing, are you?
Sam:
Not really.
Josh:
We're going to a party.
Donna:
Do you know what we are going to do at this party?
Sam:
I can only imagine.
Donna:
We are going to boogie.
Sam:
I wish you hadn't said that.
Josh: Me, too.
Donna
[ignoring them]: And do you know what I'm going to wear when we do this?
Sam:
Please don't tell me, Donna.
Donna:
Do you know what I'm going to wear?
Sam:
Donna-
Donna
[singing]: My-my-my-my-my boogie shoes…
Sam:
She told me.
Josh:
I know. Guess who's throwing the party?
Sam:
You guys, I wish I could join you in this fun game of yours, but-
Josh:
Dan Rydell and Casey McCall.
[Sam
stops walking; a moment later, Josh and Donna do the same. Josh and Donna smile slowly.]
Sam:
What?
Josh:
3rd anniversary of Sports Night.
Donna:
They invited the President, he can't go, so we can go instead.
Sam:
What, are you his favorites now or something?
Josh:
We've always been his favorites.
Donna:
Come with us, Sam.
[Ginger
walks by.]
Sam:
Ginger, tell Toby I need to talk to him.
[Scene:
Dan and Casey's office]
[Dan,
Casey, Sally]
[Blank
screen]
Dan
[VO]: Made a little bet.
Casey:
Oh?
[Fade
up. Dan and Casey are trying to write,
but it isn't really happening. It's the
day of the party.]
Dan:
Made a little bet with Sally.
Casey:
What bet?
Dan:
Bet her fifty bucks that I know important people in Washington.
Casey:
Well, you'd win if you could only prove it.
Dan:
In fact, I bet her that she would meet them at the party.
Casey:
You may very well lose this bet.
Dan:
You remember that letter we wrote to the President?
Casey:
You mean the letter you wrote?
Dan:
Your name's on it too.
Casey:
Great.
Dan:
I got a good feeling about it.
Casey:
Great, so, not only are we going to have an insane amount of people in this
office already, if your prediction comes true, we'll have that plus about
ninety Secret Service agents.
Dan:
And I told him to bring whoever he wanted.
Casey:
And you say you've got a good feeling about this?
Dan:
Yeah, Sally's gonna lose her shirt.
[Sally appears in the doorway.]
And I hope to God I didn't mean that literally.
Sally:
Good to see you too, Dan! [She sits on
the edge of Casey's desk. Casey does a
very good job of not looking at her.]
How are you doing, Casey?
Casey:
Just fine, Sally, I'm trying to write the show.
Sally:
It doesn't write itself.
Casey:
Not today it doesn't.
Dan:
Especially not with extraneous blonde people in the room.
Sally:
You wound me, Dan.
Dan:
If only, Sally.
Sally
[standing]: I just came by to tell you that Calvin Trager is coming to the
party tonight.
[Casey
and Dan look up in surprise.]
Casey:
The mega-rich guy who owns the station is going to be here tonight?
Dan:
The mega-rich guy who owns the station to whom we owe our very jobs is going to
be here tonight?
Sally:
Yep. [She heads for the door.] All bets are on, Dan.
Dan:
You betcha. [Offers a very thin
smile. Sally turns to Casey.]
Sally:
Save me a dance, Casey?
Casey:
If I can fit you in. [Sally smiles and
leaves.]
Dan:
Hey Casey, feel that?
Casey:
[looks around] Feel what?
Dan:
You don't feel it?
Casey:
It's a little chilly in here, if that's what you mean…
Dan:
That is the feeling of a Sally-free room. [Casey laughs.] The hot air, the blatant sexual overtones…
all gone!
Casey:
But you're not hostile.
Dan:
I am the picture of unhostility.
Casey:
Yes.
Dan:
Don't dance with her, Casey.
Casey:
I'll try.
Dan:
You know who you should dance with?
Casey:
Who?
Dan:
President Josiah Bartlet.
Casey:
I hear he prefers Jed.
Dan:
From you, he'd probably prefer Mr. President.
[Scene:
Various hallways in the studio]
[Dana,
Natalie, Elliot, Isaac, various people Dana yells at]
[Dana
has a clipboard and is very distracted as Natalie speaks to her. During this whole scene, Dana, with Natalie
at her heels, is moving throughout the studio very, very quickly.]
Natalie:
There should be fruit.
Dana:
Fruit?
Natalie:
We're going to have all these weird little fingerfoods, like itty-bitty
sandwiches with the crusts cut off, and pigs in a blanket, and cheese on
toothpicks, we should have fruit.
Dana:
I'm not the caterer, Natalie.
[yelling] Dave, Kim, please make
sure that they're moving the desks to the right place!
Natalie:
People get hungry, they're tired of cheese, and oh look! There's an apple!
Dana:
Will, don't forget we need chairs!
Will
[OS]: Got it!
Natalie:
Or a banana! Right there in a basket
next to the sodas!
[They
go into the booth, where Elliot and Chris are checking something on the
monitors. There is a very large bouquet
of flowers where Dana usually sits.]
Dana:
Elliot, what are these flowers doing here?
Elliot:
I don't know where to put them.
Natalie:
Maybe some plums. What I'm saying is,
we should have fruit.
Dana:
Well, put them in the editing room or something, because I'm going to need this
space.
Elliot:
Right. [picks up flowers and leaves]
Dana:
[turns to Natalie very deliberately] I will try to see if there is fruit. I can't promise anything.
Natalie:
Okay. [leaves as Isaac enters]
Isaac:
Dana-
Dana:
Hold on a sec. Chris, tell Graphics we
need to move San Antonio to the 40s to make room for Denver. [Chris nods.] Yes, Isaac.
Isaac:
Have you eaten today?
Dana:
A little.
Isaac:
When?
Dana:
Around noon.
Isaac:
That's ten hours ago!
Dana:
Well, I've been busy.
Isaac:
Dana, eat something, things are going fine, you can take a few minutes to eat.
Dana:
If I eat I'll throw up.
Isaac:
If you don't eat you'll pass out.
Dana:
So we're at a stalemate.
Isaac:
Dana, relax.
Dana:
I can't relax, Isaac.
Isaac:
Dana-
Dana:
No, Isaac, I can't. Calvin Trager is
going to be at this party tonight. He's
going to be at the show tonight. That's
a lot of pressure, to try and impress the guy who saved your job.
Isaac:
The reason he saved it in the first place is that you already impressed him.
Dana:
But everything has to be perfect.
Isaac:
It will be.
Dana:
I need to make sure. [Checks her
watch.] I'm running behind. [Leaves. Isaac sighs.]
[Scene:
Conference room]
[Calvin
Trager, Kim, Sam, Josh, Donna, Man]
[Trager
sits in the conference room, reading On
the Road. Kim opens the door and
shows Sam, Josh, and Donna in.]
Kim:
You can wait in here til the start of the show.
[Trager
looks up and sees Sam as he enters.]
Sam:
Thanks.
Trager
[conversational]: Sam.
Sam:
Calvin?
[Trager
stands, he and Sam shake hands.]
Trager:
You're in Washington now.
Sam:
Yeah, I'm writing things that other people say.
Trager:
You always were a wordy son of a bitch.
Sam:
That's why the judges liked me.
Trager:
Lucky for James.
[Josh
and Donna are by now looking politely confused.]
Sam:
Josh, Donna, this is Calvin Trager, I represented his brother about seven years
ago.
Trager:
[as he shakes with them both] People seemed to think that the paper from his
mill was giving off toxic fumes. They
were wrong.
Josh:
And what do you do?
Trager:
Well, for a start, I own this station.
Donna:
That's impressive.
Trager:
Thanks.
Sam:
Josh is the Deputy Chief of Staff, and Donna is his assistant.
Trager:
Out of curiosity, Josh, and I don't mean this flippantly at all, but what does
your job entail?
Josh:
I have absolutely no idea.
Trager:
Our country is in good hands.
Donna:
Especially with Sam telling the President what to say.
[A
man in a blue uniform pushing a cart opens the door and enters.]
Man:
We gotta set up in here.
Trager:
Ah, yes. Josh, Donna, Sam, let's take a
walk around. I'll show you some of the
ins and outs of Sports Night.
Sam:
Geez, Calvin, you act like you own the- oh.
[Scene:
The desk / the booth]
[Dan,
Casey, Natalie, Liv, Sam, Josh, Donna, Trager]
[It's
nearly showtime. Dan has trouble
sitting still; Casey is pretending to act like an older brother, but obviously
he's just as excited.]
Dan:
Do you know who's going to be here tonight?
Casey:
Lots and lots of people?
Dan:
Cal Ripken Jr.
Casey
[impressed]: Really?
Dan:
The Iron Man.
Casey:
2131.
Dan:
Cal Ripken Jr!
Casey:
How much time we got?
Dan:
Five minutes.
Casey
[calling]: Dana?
Dana
[in booth]: Five minutes, Casey.
[Casey
nods.]
Liv
[OS]: Casey!
[Liv,
wearing a jacket and looking a bit rumpled, runs to the desk and hugs Casey
from behind. She does the same to Dan,
who smiles.]
Liv:
I made it!
Casey:
Was there any doubt?
Liv:
The flight kept getting delayed, there are huge storms in Nebraska as we speak.
Casey:
Tornadoes?
Liv: Thunderstorms with hail the size of Rush Limbaugh.
Dan:
That's big.
Liv:
I'm gonna go watch the show. [Grins and
goes to the cameras as Sam, Josh, Donna and Trager enter. Dan looks up and notices them.]
Dan:
Looks like we've got quite an audience for this one. [Casey looks up, sees them, and waves to Josh and Donna; they and
Sam go over, but Trager remains behind, smiling a bit.]
Josh:
Hey, guys.
Dan:
Nice to see you again Josh, Donna.
Donna:
Dan and Casey, this is Sam Seaborn, the Deputy Communications director.
Sam
[shaking hands with Dan and Casey]: Great to meet you, I'm a big fan.
Dan
[to Casey]: Hear that? We've got
another one.
Donna:
Congratulations on a great third year, guys.
[Natalie
comes out from the booths with papers in her hands. She goes around Josh, Sam, and Donna and gives them to Dan and
Casey. Sam stares at her.]
Natalie:
Guys, just so you know, Jack's in Charlotte, not Kelly. It's on the prompter.
Casey:
Gotcha.
[Natalie
flashes a quick smile to the assembled group.
Josh, Donna, and Sam make their way back over to where Trager is
standing; Sam, for his part, looks as if he's in mild shock.]
Donna:
Sam?
Sam
[quietly]: Who was that?
Trager:
Her name's Natalie.
[Sam
nods as if mute. Josh chuckles.]
Sam
[finding his voice]: She's pretty.
Josh:
Sam, please don't be offended if I never ask you to write me a speech.
Cameraguy:
In three, two…
Dan:
Good evening, welcome to Sports Night on CSC, where it looks like third year's
a charm. That's right, this is the
third anniversary of our show's first broadcast, so you can send flowers and
well-wishes care of Continental Corp.
Casey:
In the meantime, we'll visit San Antonio, Denver, and Charlotte, and still have
enough time to go to Houston. Because
we're just that good.
Dan:
I'm Dan Rydell alongside Casey McCall, you're watching Sports Night on CSC, so
stick around.
