Still Looking
Part 4
Michael frowned at her, "I don't understand, are you telling
me that you remember nothing," even though he knew the answer to the next
question he had to ask her, "so is Alice your real name?" "I don't know I just liked it, the doctors
at the hospital wanted to call me Jane as in Jane Doe, but like I said Alice is
a lot nicer don't you think?" "Yeah, I
like it, so what do you remember then?"
She pulled her sleeping bag around her, and looked down at
her hands, "I remember waking up at the hospital and when they asked me my name
I didn't know, I didn't know the date, what had happened to me, nothing, zip,
nada. My body was in terrible pain, I could barely move, when I asked them what
was wrong with me, they were hesitant, I kinda got angry that no-one would tell
me," she gave a shaky laugh, "actually
I got pretty hysterical and they had to sedate me, the next morning I was a lot
more calmer, that's when this really nice doctor called, Dr Lather came to see
me," she looked at Michael, he was laughing at her, "I'm sorry, but Dr
Lather." "Yeah I know, I did the same
thing I burst out laughing too, it did break the ice though, she had the kind
of voice that soothes you like in my dream, but at least I could see her face,
she had the most amazing eyes, that shone like crystals, and her smile could
light up a room, anyway, she was the one that told me how I was found and what
was wrong with me." She took a deep
breath and looked down at her hands again, "you see, I was violated, you know…..raped…" Michael squeezed his eyes closed, since her
dream, he had a feeling that she had been, but he didn't want to believe it
until she said it, then he new it was true, "I'm sorry, look you don't have to
tell me if you don't want to."
Alice looked up and reached over and took his hand, "I'd
like to tell you the rest, if you'll let me? You see I haven't told anyone else
and I think the time is right, are you okay about that?" Michael looked at her, and nodded he didn't
dare speak, else he might just break down and cry in front of her now, he had
to be strong for her, he had to let her speak. "Anyway, not only was I raped, but the guy who did this also beat me up
and stabbed me in the stomach, he left me for dead," Michael remembered the pains he felt the night he went to Isabel
for help, he had felt Maria being stabbed only at the time he didn't realise
it. "So how did you get to be in the hospital?" "It turned out that the place he left me was where most of the
kids around there went to make out, they called for an ambulance and that's
where I woke up, not knowing who I was. Dr Lather did loads of tests on me, but
there was no scarring on my brain, her conclusion was that somehow I blocked
out what happened, but I had also blocked out the everything else too, she
called it post traumatic stress, basically I have amnesia. Dr Lather said that
someday my memory might come back or I may never know what did happen that
night."
Michael looked at her, how can she be so calm, why had she
not gone crazy, look at him, before Maria disappeared, all he could think about
was trying to find out who he was, what he was and where he come from. "So what happened then?" "I was in the hospital for about 2 weeks,
the police came for a statement, but I couldn't tell them anything and no-one
put out a missing persons report so there was nothing more they could do for
me, I moved into a hostel, they helped me find a job, when I saved enough
money, I bought a bus ticket and ended up in Colorado, I got a job as a
waitress at Ranchers, shared an apartment with one of the other girls, I even
managed to save enough money for my bike and that brings me to the present. So
what do you think? Still want to ride with me?" "'Course if want to still ride with you, I think you're the bravest
person I've ever known." "You're wrong
Michael, if I was brave I would remember that night, I would remember my life
before, I don't even know if I have family somewhere out there, so you see I'm
not brave, I'm a coward." Her eyes filled with tears and ran down her face,
Michael reached over and wiped them away, he leaned over and was close enough
to kiss her, the temptation was too great, he had to taste her lips. They kissed.
* FLASH *
Michael kissing Maria, in the Crashdown, Michael crying in
her arms after the Hank situation, Michael and Maria dancing at the prom,
Alex's bedroom after the funeral then Michael screaming Maria's name the night
Isabel connected with her.
* End Flash*
She broke the kiss and staggered back from Michael, her eyes
looked dazed, "what the hell was that? What did you do to me?" Michael stood to go to her but she stepped
back from him, he stopped and just looked at her and put his hand out, she
stepped further back, he dropped his hand, "they were our memories, they were
YOUR memories." "That's not possible,
you're lying I don't know you, stay the hell away from me." She started to walk away from him, "Maria
wait!" She turned then, "what did you call me?"
Michael stepped closer, "Maria, that's your name." Maria shook her head, "No that's the name of
the girl you said I looked like." "I
said that you looked like her because you are her, your name is Maria Deluca,
I've been looking for you for the past 2 years, please you've got to believe
me."
Maria was starting to feel dizzy, she put her hand to her
head which was now pounding, "I don't believe you, I don't Ahhhhh…." Maria fell to her knees and Michael ran up
to her, "Maria! Maria, what's wrong, please talk to me." Maria couldn't speak for the pain in her
head, she felt like she was going to explode, then she gasped and fainted,
Michael was going frantic, what had he done, he had hurt her again, why
couldn't he just have let it be, why couldn't he have given her more time to
get to know him first, and in his mind he answered himself, 'because you wanted
your Maria back', but what if now he had lost her for good.
While Michael was calling her name, Maria had flashes going
through her mind, she saw images of her life, her dad leaving, her red
sneakers, Michael pulling her pigtails, the day Liz was shot, finding out about
the aliens, Michael kissing her to calm her down, the images were coming faster
now, she saw herself leave a note to all her friends telling them she needed to
find herself, then the images went in slow motion and she saw herself being
attacked and heard herself scream Michaels name, she heard Isabel's voice and
telling her it was too late, she felt herself drift away from Isabel, then she
heard Michaels voice again, 'Maria, please come back to me, don't leave me now,
I've only just found, I love you so much, open your eyes please'.
Michael held her and was rocking her back and forth, he hung
on and said her name over and over, willing her to open her eyes, she moaned
and he stopped rocking and looked down, her eyes slowly opened, Maria looked at
Michael, she lifted her hand and touched his face it was wet with tears, "Michael,
I remember, I remember everything." Michael bent his head down towards her and kissed her, he wrapped his
arms around and they clung to each other, Maria turned her head to his ear and
whispered "I love you too."