Untitled Document
A Stupid
Silly Scary Story - Second Batch
A/N: Once
again, we much apologize for making you, the reader, read this.
This second batch of terrible jokes and lame puns (not to mention
rampidly flaming homosexual men and tons of inside jokes) is just
as bad, if not worse, than the first. After reading this, we suggest
at least three hours in confession, not to mention regular visits
to church for the next two months. Hehe, anyway, for those of
you who won't be traumatized by this, break out the snacks
and enjoy!
Another A/N: Once again, like the first, this story
as a bunch of inside jokes which will be noted with the following:
*(#). They will then be explained at the end of the story. Enjoy!
One last A/N: Of you didn't read the first one (A Stupid
Silly Scary Story), you must do so to understand how we wrote
this. Otherwise, the following set-up might not make too much
sense.
~~~
Person #1 (Myself - again): After
a long day of fighting in the training center, Zell was hungry
for hotdogs.
Person #2 (Nicki): Knowing that
the hotdogs tended to go fast, he immediately stopped by the cafeteria
to see if there were any left.
Person #3 (Pendragon): When, suddenly,
out of the blue, he was mauled by White Blaze *(1).
Person #4 (Ashleigh): Everyone just
stood there laughing.
Person #5 (Shingo the Pest): After
satisfying himself, the horny cat ran off leaving a traumatized
Zell on the floor.
Person #6: (Orchid0918): Then, poor
Zell was trampled by 115 trees, 30 spiders, the entire cast of
'Cats,' a bookshelf, and five dancing moogles.
#1: Zell, near death, had a near
death experience.
#2: But he was magically saved by
a little green flag and a wet monkey named Bobo.
#3: Then Bobo pulled off its mast
o reveal Ashleigh, another wet monkey.
#4: Ashleigh then pulled out the
gun that Quistis used to kill the X-ATM092 to kill Sara (Pendragon).
#5: Zell, who had been in the hospital,
woke up and decided to start preaching to everyone the 'truth'
he was seen during his near-death experience.
#6: Then, a large, badly animated
sword fell from nowhere and turned Ashleigh into a green cherry
*(2).
#1: Zell began preaching to the
entire garden about the lie we all live.
#2: It turns out humans originated
from a necropheliac named Ryo *(3) and a stewardess named Bill.
#3: His charge being a necropheliac,
White Blaze hate the green cherry and buried himself 2,500 feet
underground.
#4: (Ashleigh chose not to write
anything. I wonder why?)
#5: Seifer and Squall were in agreement
for once; they kidnapped the preacher Zell and ran away to Centra
where they screwed the poor boy silly in Odin's room.
#6: On a slightly unrelated topic,
all the Gundam pilots were killed when the computers went psycho
and the twisted wreckage fell on Nicki and she died. Woohoo.*(4)
#1: Zell woke up several hours later
after his molestation and said, "Damn! That was good!"
#2: After he cleaned up, he immediately
took to the streets, screaming, "I just had the best sex
of my life and I loved it! Anyone got a beer?"
#3: While running, he tripped and
fell into an open sewer followed by an Aztec warrior, a door-to-door
salesman, an entire circus on parade, and 20 contestants of a
sack race, two of which were horny.
#4: (Once again, Ashleigh chose
not to write.)
#5: The two horny contestants were
the lion from the last story (whose name was really Red XII*(5)),
and the ghost of Ultimecia, and after the Aztec warrior, the door-to-door
salesman, the circus on parade, and the other 18 contestants in
the sack race left, Red XII and Ultimecia attacked Zell.
#6: Also, Ally was bitten by a moose
. . .
#1: and Erin (Orchid0918) was bitten
by a llama *(6).
#2: And my car is red.
#3: And that car was crushed by
a large, brown newt with coconuts on it's feet. *(7)
#4: A slasher came through town
and killed everyone and the craziness was over. Fin.
#6: P.S. A giant ceramic panther
crushes the slasher, stuffed tigers and stuffed triceratopses
maimed the bodies of Ashleigh and Nicki, swallows carrying coconuts
attacked DBZ magazines, Lara Croft was crushed by a giant wooden
rabbit, and Angelo was turned into a chinchilla.
#6 (still): P.P.S.: An angry mob
of balloon animals attacked the narrators by floating at them
*(8), evil squirrels ran rapid in cities, and the orange phantomey
thingies from the Final Fantasy movie danced around a conga line,
an unimportant woman named Relena was killed by an insane rabbit,
Twizzlers whipped Hildi and Dorthy to death to make Ashleigh happy,
then broccoli haunted the writers and readers. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha. Ha-ack! *cough, cough* *(9)
The end?
Story Notes:
*(1): White Blaze is the name Sara,
a.k.a. Pendragon, named her little white stuffed tiger. Awwwww
. . . isn't that cute???
*(2): The sword is from Final Fantasy
6 (originally released as FF3). Instead of GF's, there were called
Espers, and one, Ragnarok, was a large sword that turned enemies
into items. A green cherry cured a status called Imp, which was
when you were turned into, you got it, an imp.
*(3): Ryo is evidentially from Ronin
Warriors. I didn't know, but I called someone who would know and
that's what they told me. So there.
*(4): She put the woo-hoo in, I
didn't. Don't ask.
*(5): Yes, I know the right name
is Red XIII, but when the person originally wrote it, they accidentally
left out a I, so it was called Red XII.
*(6): This was from Monty Python
& the Holy Grail. In the beginning credits, they talk about
mooses, then llamas.
*(7): Another Monty Python joke.
Have you guessed that we watched the movie yet?
*(8): Floating at them? Hehe - you
should've seen all the acting we did that came from that. =)
*(9): First of all, that was a HUGE
run-on sentence. Second, she's a violent child, isn't she? =)
Once again, I apologize for this
story. There is nothing I can say. *bows*