Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is owned by Gainax of course but all of you already
know that.
Hi all! Ha, I'm pretty sure you didn't miss me but yes, here is the "End" part of my little
story. I had this done awhile ago but I was just too lazy to type it. Hate it. Like it.
But I hope you take the time to read it.
CHANGES: Chapter 3
The End ~ Part 1
It was strange. He kept telling himself over and over again because why was he feeling this
way? He was mesmerized by her though he hated to admit it. Try as he might, he could
not shut his emotions out when he was around her like he could do for other people. He
could not hurt her even if he tried. No one ever treated him with such kindness before.
And she said she cared right?
"You know what?" She asked looking up at him.
They walked down the mainstreet of an amusement park. It was late afternoon, the wind
was softly blowing sakura in every direction. He didn't really respond to her just yet. He
held her hand and squeezed it for her to know that he had heard her. He was
really...hmm...he really liked her. She was so nice, so welcoming, so everything... "What is
it?" He finally said.
They stopped walking. She let go of his hand and walked in front of him with a smile on
her face. She ran her hand through her short brown hair and blushed slightly. "You should
smile more often, Rokubungi-san."
He was surprised. He wasn't expecting her to say that at all. "Huh?" he said dumbfounded.
"You should smile more often, you look nice when you do."
This time it was his turn to blush. His face felt hot and his heart began to beat faster. It
was only her that can make him do such a thing. He smiled a little while trying to hide his
shyness.
She giggled at his actions. "You're kawaii, Rokubungi-san. Maybe you shouldn't hide it so
often to other people."
"I can't help it," he replied.
"Why?" she asked innocently.
He wanted to tell her, yet he didn't want to. She could never really understand all the
suffering he went through growing up. Unlike him, she had grown up happy. With a
father and a mother and with memories that made her smile often. He would sit beside her
at times and for reasons unknown to him, she would sometimes have this serene smile on
her face... *How he missed that*.... He looked back to face her again shaking his head.
"Umm.. It's... it's nothing really."
"It's alright. I understand."
She didn't let him explain that day about his past. She could tell that it was too hard for
him to do so and it was OK to her. She understood. That shocked him. She took his hand
in hers and smiled warmly up at him. She said nothing else after that but everything she did
had that welcoming feeling he always wanted and needed. She was always so warm.
****
The old man opened his eyes squinting from the bright light. Although he could not move
his body nor his head, he knew where he was. He has not seen the place for a long time.
It was this place where he last saw the sunlight. And now he was back. The place was still
bare, yet it didn't feel cold like it used to be.
He tried to say something but nothing came out. He knew someone was there with him
but they were standing in his blind spot so he could not see. He grunted softly instead.
Hopefully they would notice that he was awake. But no one came to his side. Maybe no
one was in there with him after all. Maybe it was just his imagination. He sighed and
looked up at the ceiling. He hated this place.
Then he felt a warm touch on his wrist. It felt for a pulse. But when he focused his eyes on
the dark haired woman in a white doctor's coat, she had turned away from him to check
his I.V. He tried to say something to her... "A..A..gaki..."
She turned around slowly, he watched her write something down on her clipboard. She
was older now, just like him, like everyone. Her hair was brown again and for some reason
she looked more like her mother. She looked at him with expressionless eyes and when he
tried to say something again, she quickly turned away from him and left in a hurry.
He sighed and closed his eyes. He was alone. He was used to that.
****
"Do you have any feelings for me?" She asked without looking at him. She sat up on the
bed and put her head on her hands. Her short dyed blond hair, covering her face.
He didn't answer her. He kept silent. She already knew the answer anyway.
****
"You used her..."
He looked at his bandaged hands. "Yes, I know. I had too. I had no other way." He said
grabbing his head. It was that voice again. It was her voice.
"But she loved you. She wanted you to care."
"I couldn't care. I didn't want to care."
He wanted it to stop. He wanted to think about anything but the past. He was comfortable
just sitting there in his dark cell.. hating everyone and himself.
But the voice was making him listen. Even when she's gone he couldn't help but be weak
to her. She was the only one who can do that to him.
"Why?"
"Because..." he said, with his voice trailing.
"Why?" The voice asked again. "Why, Why, Why, Why, Why?"
He covered his ears so the voice would stop. It disturbed him. "Stop it" he said. "Please
stop!"
"Why, why, why?" It continued.
Over and over again it asked. Why was he cruel? Why couldn't he care? Why couldn't he
have feelings for her? For him? For everyone?
"It's because... It's because they are not you.." he finally said with a deep sigh. "You're the
only one that I can care about. It's no use denying it. I wanted to be with you. You're the
only one that understood. You're the only one. You're the only one that cared."
"There are others that care, if you let them."
"I don't want them to care."
"Why?"
"Because they are not you.:"
"Is that why you put that thing in your hand?"
"Yes, to be with you."
"Is that why you created her?"
"Yes, to be with you."
"But you used her too."
"I did. It was because of..."
"Did you even care?"
"I... I wanted to be with you."
"So you hurt others just to be with me?"
"Yes"
"He wanted you to care"
"Yes"
"You closed yourself to him. You are afraid."
"Stop it please. It is over."
"Is it too painful?"
"Yes."
"Do you feel regret?"
He closed his eyes putting his head on his hands. "Stop it. I don't want to hear it
anymore."
"It is troubling you. You are regreting it. But you don't want to hear it. It pains you but
you don't want to listen. You're hurting..."
"I... I just wanted to be with you. You understood. You welcomed me when no one did.
You cared when no one did. You smiled when no one did." He kept on, still covering his
face with his hands. He knew was being pathetic now. But it was the truth.
"There are many that would welcome you if you gave them a chance."
"It is not the same. They are not you."
"But I'm gone."
"Not in my heart." He whispered. "All I wanted was just to be with you. You don't know
how much I wanted to be with you. But it doesn't matter now. It is over."
"It doesn't have to be over..."
****
"They told me about you. They said that you have... ummm... they said that you were
sick. How come you didn't mention it? Ritsuko-san told us also."
"It is not important" He said in a whisper. It was the loudest his voice could go.
"You've been here since Saturday."
The old man looked at him. So he has been in the NERV hospital for two days now and
all that time the past kept coming back to him. It disturbed him to think about it.
Shinji stood still looking down at him. He didn't say another word. Like he was unsure
what to really do.
"I am OK," the old man said. "I am just tired."
"You shouldn't have walked all the way here. Someone could have taken you."
"I didn't want that."
'Why not?"
"Because I wanted to do it for myself. I wanted to see everything..." It was hard for him to
talk. Everything ached. It seemed like he was a hundred years old. But why was Shinji
asking anyway? Was he concerned? Was he worried? Still no sign of emotion showed
through his voice nor his face. "I wanted..." the old man continued slowly. He smiled
inwardly. His reason for what he did a few days before was slightly amusing now. "Just
wanted to see the sun." he finished... but his voice became too soft for Shinji to hear fully.
The old man noticed a crease on the young man's forehead. He knew that Shinji did not
hear him but Shinji kept silent.
He was going to continue to speak. To tell Shinji something. He did not want the young
man to go and leave him alone again. "I'm.. I'm glad... I got.. I got.." he began slowly
again.
He was not able to finish though. The sudden opening of the hospital room startled them
both.
"Shinji-kun! Come quickly! It's Ask..." A familiar voice, he noticed. It belonged to
Katsuragi but he did not get to see her.
"Asuka" Shinji said almost to himself. The old man can see worry in the younger man's
eyes now. "Asuka...." Shinji repeated. "Misato-san?" He turned away from the old man.
He didn't wait for the woman's answer as he quickly made his way out the door.
Continued in Part 2
know that.
Hi all! Ha, I'm pretty sure you didn't miss me but yes, here is the "End" part of my little
story. I had this done awhile ago but I was just too lazy to type it. Hate it. Like it.
But I hope you take the time to read it.
CHANGES: Chapter 3
The End ~ Part 1
It was strange. He kept telling himself over and over again because why was he feeling this
way? He was mesmerized by her though he hated to admit it. Try as he might, he could
not shut his emotions out when he was around her like he could do for other people. He
could not hurt her even if he tried. No one ever treated him with such kindness before.
And she said she cared right?
"You know what?" She asked looking up at him.
They walked down the mainstreet of an amusement park. It was late afternoon, the wind
was softly blowing sakura in every direction. He didn't really respond to her just yet. He
held her hand and squeezed it for her to know that he had heard her. He was
really...hmm...he really liked her. She was so nice, so welcoming, so everything... "What is
it?" He finally said.
They stopped walking. She let go of his hand and walked in front of him with a smile on
her face. She ran her hand through her short brown hair and blushed slightly. "You should
smile more often, Rokubungi-san."
He was surprised. He wasn't expecting her to say that at all. "Huh?" he said dumbfounded.
"You should smile more often, you look nice when you do."
This time it was his turn to blush. His face felt hot and his heart began to beat faster. It
was only her that can make him do such a thing. He smiled a little while trying to hide his
shyness.
She giggled at his actions. "You're kawaii, Rokubungi-san. Maybe you shouldn't hide it so
often to other people."
"I can't help it," he replied.
"Why?" she asked innocently.
He wanted to tell her, yet he didn't want to. She could never really understand all the
suffering he went through growing up. Unlike him, she had grown up happy. With a
father and a mother and with memories that made her smile often. He would sit beside her
at times and for reasons unknown to him, she would sometimes have this serene smile on
her face... *How he missed that*.... He looked back to face her again shaking his head.
"Umm.. It's... it's nothing really."
"It's alright. I understand."
She didn't let him explain that day about his past. She could tell that it was too hard for
him to do so and it was OK to her. She understood. That shocked him. She took his hand
in hers and smiled warmly up at him. She said nothing else after that but everything she did
had that welcoming feeling he always wanted and needed. She was always so warm.
****
The old man opened his eyes squinting from the bright light. Although he could not move
his body nor his head, he knew where he was. He has not seen the place for a long time.
It was this place where he last saw the sunlight. And now he was back. The place was still
bare, yet it didn't feel cold like it used to be.
He tried to say something but nothing came out. He knew someone was there with him
but they were standing in his blind spot so he could not see. He grunted softly instead.
Hopefully they would notice that he was awake. But no one came to his side. Maybe no
one was in there with him after all. Maybe it was just his imagination. He sighed and
looked up at the ceiling. He hated this place.
Then he felt a warm touch on his wrist. It felt for a pulse. But when he focused his eyes on
the dark haired woman in a white doctor's coat, she had turned away from him to check
his I.V. He tried to say something to her... "A..A..gaki..."
She turned around slowly, he watched her write something down on her clipboard. She
was older now, just like him, like everyone. Her hair was brown again and for some reason
she looked more like her mother. She looked at him with expressionless eyes and when he
tried to say something again, she quickly turned away from him and left in a hurry.
He sighed and closed his eyes. He was alone. He was used to that.
****
"Do you have any feelings for me?" She asked without looking at him. She sat up on the
bed and put her head on her hands. Her short dyed blond hair, covering her face.
He didn't answer her. He kept silent. She already knew the answer anyway.
****
"You used her..."
He looked at his bandaged hands. "Yes, I know. I had too. I had no other way." He said
grabbing his head. It was that voice again. It was her voice.
"But she loved you. She wanted you to care."
"I couldn't care. I didn't want to care."
He wanted it to stop. He wanted to think about anything but the past. He was comfortable
just sitting there in his dark cell.. hating everyone and himself.
But the voice was making him listen. Even when she's gone he couldn't help but be weak
to her. She was the only one who can do that to him.
"Why?"
"Because..." he said, with his voice trailing.
"Why?" The voice asked again. "Why, Why, Why, Why, Why?"
He covered his ears so the voice would stop. It disturbed him. "Stop it" he said. "Please
stop!"
"Why, why, why?" It continued.
Over and over again it asked. Why was he cruel? Why couldn't he care? Why couldn't he
have feelings for her? For him? For everyone?
"It's because... It's because they are not you.." he finally said with a deep sigh. "You're the
only one that I can care about. It's no use denying it. I wanted to be with you. You're the
only one that understood. You're the only one. You're the only one that cared."
"There are others that care, if you let them."
"I don't want them to care."
"Why?"
"Because they are not you.:"
"Is that why you put that thing in your hand?"
"Yes, to be with you."
"Is that why you created her?"
"Yes, to be with you."
"But you used her too."
"I did. It was because of..."
"Did you even care?"
"I... I wanted to be with you."
"So you hurt others just to be with me?"
"Yes"
"He wanted you to care"
"Yes"
"You closed yourself to him. You are afraid."
"Stop it please. It is over."
"Is it too painful?"
"Yes."
"Do you feel regret?"
He closed his eyes putting his head on his hands. "Stop it. I don't want to hear it
anymore."
"It is troubling you. You are regreting it. But you don't want to hear it. It pains you but
you don't want to listen. You're hurting..."
"I... I just wanted to be with you. You understood. You welcomed me when no one did.
You cared when no one did. You smiled when no one did." He kept on, still covering his
face with his hands. He knew was being pathetic now. But it was the truth.
"There are many that would welcome you if you gave them a chance."
"It is not the same. They are not you."
"But I'm gone."
"Not in my heart." He whispered. "All I wanted was just to be with you. You don't know
how much I wanted to be with you. But it doesn't matter now. It is over."
"It doesn't have to be over..."
****
"They told me about you. They said that you have... ummm... they said that you were
sick. How come you didn't mention it? Ritsuko-san told us also."
"It is not important" He said in a whisper. It was the loudest his voice could go.
"You've been here since Saturday."
The old man looked at him. So he has been in the NERV hospital for two days now and
all that time the past kept coming back to him. It disturbed him to think about it.
Shinji stood still looking down at him. He didn't say another word. Like he was unsure
what to really do.
"I am OK," the old man said. "I am just tired."
"You shouldn't have walked all the way here. Someone could have taken you."
"I didn't want that."
'Why not?"
"Because I wanted to do it for myself. I wanted to see everything..." It was hard for him to
talk. Everything ached. It seemed like he was a hundred years old. But why was Shinji
asking anyway? Was he concerned? Was he worried? Still no sign of emotion showed
through his voice nor his face. "I wanted..." the old man continued slowly. He smiled
inwardly. His reason for what he did a few days before was slightly amusing now. "Just
wanted to see the sun." he finished... but his voice became too soft for Shinji to hear fully.
The old man noticed a crease on the young man's forehead. He knew that Shinji did not
hear him but Shinji kept silent.
He was going to continue to speak. To tell Shinji something. He did not want the young
man to go and leave him alone again. "I'm.. I'm glad... I got.. I got.." he began slowly
again.
He was not able to finish though. The sudden opening of the hospital room startled them
both.
"Shinji-kun! Come quickly! It's Ask..." A familiar voice, he noticed. It belonged to
Katsuragi but he did not get to see her.
"Asuka" Shinji said almost to himself. The old man can see worry in the younger man's
eyes now. "Asuka...." Shinji repeated. "Misato-san?" He turned away from the old man.
He didn't wait for the woman's answer as he quickly made his way out the door.
Continued in Part 2