Downpour
Time: 7:41 p.m.
Location: Hell
Date: December 7, 2000
Dwelling on the cold ground for hours, I have forgotten everything I had ever known. I pleaded, even threatened that if they took Quistis, I'd kill them. Of course, they ignored me.
I watched them carry her away, her legs bouncing and kicking weakly in the air, her long fingers held open as if she was waiting for my hand. The lanky man's back was blocking her face, but I could see the top of her head peeking out. Flaxen silky strands poured from her everyday up-do, and trailed past his arms. They swayed back and forth, shuffling sadly in the numbing breeze.
The mass of people began to slowly disappear, walking off, murmuring to each other "Oh, what a poor young man." Pitying me, which made me want to dumbly cry harder. I'm not as strong as I thought. I can't fight death.
The hissing night surrounded me, as the snow piled higher and higher. It was dark; I couldn't see. For the first time in my "brave" life I had no idea what I was going to do. I did however know one thing for sure. Nothing will ever be the same.
Time: 8:45 p.m.
Location: Haunting space
Date: December 7, 2000
Balamb Garden was quiet. Everyone all ready knew they had lost not only an instructor, but also a beautiful friend. Ice clung to my windowsill, and made the room seem colder.
Dents covered the left side of the bed where she once slept, and her un-graded schoolwork continues to lie stacked up neatly on the nearby desk. Blinking slowly, my once teary eyes seemed dry, and they were beginning to burn.
It almost felt like nothing had happened. Like she was still in her classroom, reviewing papers. In an hour or so, she'd greet me. Smiling. She was always smiling.
Time: 10:43 a.m.
Location: Balamb Garden [Outside]
Date: December 8, 2000
Company has tried to greet me; they've tried to cheer me up. But I don't need it. I'm alone. I want to be left alone.
Sighing, I look down at her journal, which I've chosen to keep with me at all times. I'm not sure, but I could've sworn I was smiling as I read the numerous times she felt so happy and content with me. Flipping through the pages, I run my finger down the soft paper, and soak up her fingerprints and ink.
She's beautiful. As beautiful as the sun that melts this ice. As beautiful as the night that disguises us all. She only shows what she wants us to see. Nobody would ever understand her. People would've treated her differently had they known what I know.
The wind chilled me. It seemed as if she was hugging me. Trying to keep me warm, despite how cold her touch has grown.
The sky was beginning to darken, and everyone that was outside retreated into the building. Cold drops of ice poured from the vault of Heaven, as I held my head back and let it hit my face.
"I feel you Quistis…" I silently spoke. "…I'm sorry for everything. I wish I could've taken care of you. I wish I were able to fill your chest with my air. If there's anything I can do that'll bring you back, I'll do it. I don't want to long for you again."
Stopping at an entry, I quietly read squinting my eyes, trying to hold it all in.
December 6
Eventually, everything will work out. We won't know what it's like to hurt anymore. I saw the world again, shining like trees of fire, beyond these fields of green. We spun in circles in these plains; we counted all the water drops in the sea. I fell into the grass. I woke up alone. It doesn't matter. He'll find me. He always finds me. I adore him for it. He's Seifer. He's everything.
Re-reading her latest entry, I analyzed every word. I hadn't noticed it in here before, but I'm glad I found it. Shutting the book, I placed it under my coat, protecting it from the cold. Somewhere…across the universe…I'll find her. Sprawling out on the bench, I ignore the frozen wood, as I watch my coat flail in the harsh wind. I don't mind. The wind takes me high. It makes me float. It makes me free.
"The girl on the wall always waited for me, and she was always smiling. The teenage death boys, the teenage death girls, and everyone was dancing. Nothing could touch us then, no one could change us then, and everyone was dancing. Nothing could hurt us then, no one could see us then, and everyone was dancing. Everyone was dancing."
-Unknown
The End
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