Title: For You
Author: Ashley
E-mail: "mailto:x_quite_deceiving_x@yahoo.com"
Category: WWF
Disclaimer: I own no one. The lyrics below are from "For You" by Staind, on their album, 'Break The Cycle.' All lyrics are used without permission.
Distribution: Ask first.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: 3/36/2001.
Summary: Afterthoughts of the Vince and Shane confontation.

Shane sat alone on the bed in his hotel room after the Raw taping finished. He never liked being alone, but was always thankful for his time to think. He had a lit cigarette in his hand, just breathing in the smoke, as he contemplated everything that was happening, to his life and to the business. The business was in shambles. His family, the same. What kind of greed could push them to this?
He finished his cig and tossed it into the ashtray on the nightstand. He stood up and went to his overnight bag. He took out his cd player and went back to his bed. He selected track 10 and put it on repeat, continuing to think about all his problems.

To my mother, to my father. It's your son or it's your daughter. Are my screams loud enough for you to hear me? Should I turn it up for you?

'Does anyone really know what I'm going through? Can anyone see it on my face? I almost feel bad for our superstars for having to be in the middle of this family battle. Why can't we just be normal? Were we ever meant to be?'


I sit here locked inside my head. Remembering everything you've said.

'Why does Vince hate me so much? I've always tried to please him in everything. I played all the sports that he wanted me to even though I would have rathered just joined the chess club, or stayed on my computer. Hell, I even got in a fight with the team captain to wear his number. I've done nothing to deserve this.'

This silence gets us nowhere! Gets us nowhere way too fast! The silence is what kills me.

'All I want to do is talk to him. Talk to him without him having to demean me. I want to be civil, why can't that work both ways? I don't want this distant to continue to between us, but it there anything that I could really do?'

I need someone here to help me.

'I need my Marissa. I need Stephanie. I need mom. I just need someone to listen to me right now,' Shane starts to cry to himself.

But you don't know how to listen and let me make my decisions.

'What's the use? No one cares. Everyone tells me what I don't want to hear.'

All your insults and your curses make me feel like I'm not a person. And I feel like I'm nothing.

Shane wipes a tear from his eye, 'Just remembering what he said to me a couple months ago in that ring.'

"Now while you can listen to me, let me tell you something: I will never, ever forgive your mother for giving birth to you!"

'I wonder if he even knows how much that hurt me. I wonder if he knows how much I still think about it.'

But you made me so do something. Because I'm fucked up because you are. Need attention, attention you couldn't give.

'He made me, can't he see what I am because of him? He's always worried about his precious business, but has he ever felt the same for his family? The same flesh and blood that has been there for him in all of his times of depression.'

Shane turns off the cd player and throws it across the room, watching it smash to the floor. He curls himself up into a ball on his bed and starts crying. "I just want him to love me again," he whispers over and over until finally falling asleep.