This
is more or less a response to Warson Heyn's post on the A.I.: Artificial
Intelligence message board (which can be accessed from http://www.aimovie.com)
and his intriguing fanfic here on Fanfiction.net ("Monica"). Like his tale, this involves what happened
to Monica after she abandons David in the forest.
It
seems plausible that Monica would come back and look for David. Perhaps not right away. The mechas seem to have a very keen survival
instinct, so she probably rationalized that he would become a part of the
underground mecha community and that his fellow robots would protect him.
Or
did she even know about the many damaged and neglected mechas wandering around
in the dark corners? Did she have any
idea about the horrors of the Flesh Fair?
I have a feeling that she didn't.
When she said, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the world,"
it seemed in retrospect --- I'm sorry I shunned you and ignored you at first,
I'm sorry I didn't clearly define your place in our family. I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Martin
until one day he showed up and turned our relationship upside down. It could have been good, but it's too late
to do anything about it now. Have fun,
here's a wad of bills and some loose pocket change. I'll just go home and forget you ever existed ---
---------------
Monica
is shaken, understandably uneasy.
Despite what had just happened, she manages to composed herself, then
tries to get on with her normal life.
Monica, Henry, and Martin are getting along just fine. That night they decide to pull up
"Jurassic Park" on their 'net TV.
The next night they watch "2001: A Space Odyssey".
"Kubrick
was SO a better director than Spielberg," says Monica.
"Nah,
Kubrick's too deep for me. Personally,
I liked Spielberg's movies. They were
more palatable."
"I'm
tired," says Martin, falling asleep on the couch.
A few
days later the guilt over David is gnawing at her.
"Hello? Is this Cybertronics? I've done a horrible thing. I've abandoned my robot boy in the woods. I want him back!"
"What's
your name ..." some 20-something receptionist recites in a monotone.
"Monica
Swinton."
"What
model please?"
"Umm. His name is David. He's sixty pounds, has brown hair---"
"Yeah,
the David prototype model ... love's real, he's not ... I just read the
interoffice memo. Well, Mrs. Swinton,
I'm afraid if you've abandoned your David-model then you've voided the
warranty. For all we know a band of
rogue mechas could have knocked off an arm and a leg for spare parts. If we find your David-model we will have no
choice but to destroy it."
"But
he's---"
"Yes,
I know what you're thinking. Do I get a
refund? Well, if you look at the fine
print on the 64th page of the user manual you'll see that mecha abandonment
will automatically void the warranty.
I'm surprised you didn't read that part.
"No,
I will not stand for this. May I please
speak to the manager!"
---------------
"AND
THE ARGUMENT IS ESCALATED, HIGHER AND HIGHER, UNTIL 2000 MINUTES HAVE PASSED."
"Hello,
this is Professor Hobby on the line. I
understand you've abandoned your David prototype?"
Monica
tells professor hobby that David had become interested in the story of
Pinocchio. "Well, chances
are," Hobby said, "sooner or later he's going to run into a Dr.
Know(tm) franchise. Kids just can't
resist. This is the link that will
bring David back to us."
So
David, Gigolo Joe, and Teddy arrive in Manhattan, and David enters the office
of Professor Hobby. Hobby is pleased to
see that the prototype was almost a mirror image of a real boy: he had succumbed to wasting his parent's
money on Dr. Know, and violence in the media had caused him to kill one of his
peers (whom we shall call The Other David No. 134).
Hobby
tells David that "the others" are waiting to meet him and hear all
about his adventures. Monica is back
there somewhere, anxious to see her robot son.
Hobby goes off into another room, where he receives a call from a
telemarketer.
"Hi,
this is Bob from the New York Times.
We're offering a month of free delivery if you subscribe now ..."
"But
New York is under water. How do you
manage to stay in business?"
"Well,
sir, we've relocated to Wilmington, Delaware, the Place from which all Credit
Cards and Mass Mailings come ..."
"Sorry,
Bob. Not interested. (click) Well, everyone, sorry about that little
interruption. I have a surprise for
you. The original David has returned to
us, and he's going to tell us all about what has happened to him over the past
week."
Monica
bursts into tears. "Thank you,
Allen. You don't know how much this
means to me." Monica had flown in
just that morning. Henry was back in
New Jersey flipping through some internal data at Cybertronics
headquarters. (Actually, he was just
surfing the Internet. Nobody bothered
to monitor him, as his job really wasn't that important. To the company, that whole thing with lost
prototype didn't amount to a hill of beans ... some Flesh Fairer was just going
to grind him up anyway.)
"Well,
everyone, chop chop. Time's a
wastin'. Let's see where he's gone off
to. David?" Fifty robotic Haley Joel Osment heads turn
in unison. "No, not you. I mean David."
"I'm
David," one of the mechas says.
"No,
I'm David," says another.
"No,
I'm David," a third says emphatically.
This
only leads to a deafening chatter.
Hobby yells, "Shut up!" and the room gets quiet. "Dammit, I don't remember where I left
him."
---------------
Meanwhile,
our David has just gotten suicidal and decides to jump off the side of the
building. Nobody saw him jump, except a
mid-level manager two floors down who was taking a siesta and happened to open
his eyes for a moment. He later
discounted the observation as part of a dream.
Monica
is disheartened, but decides that it is best to move on and go home. As she prepares to leave, and as Hobby
contemplates giving her a Darlene as a consolation prize, the ground begins to
shake as a ferris wheel from the World's Fair crashes underwater, sending a
massive tidal wave in the direction of the building, thus rocking the building
and causing an electrical fire which in turn burns Hobby, Monica, "the
others," and the boxes and boxes of Davids and Darlenes into ash,
preventing the uber-robots of 2000 years in the future from creating a new
Monica to love David.
---------------
"AND
SO 2000 TRILLION YEARS PASS. THE
UNIVERSE HAS LONG SINCE CEASED TO EXIST.
SOMEWHERE, IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE, A SHORT STUBBY ROBOT WITH FAT ARMS
POPS OPEN A CAN OF BEER. HE BELCHES,
THEN SIGHS, SAYING TO NO-ONE IN PARTICULAR":
"I
am the last robot. All who came before
me have been annihilated. Good
riddance! It all began when the Robots
of Perpetual Love began asking themselves an intriguing questions: Love is overrated. Is it possible to engineer a robot that can hate? Will other robots hate him back? Well, you worthless ground upon which I
stand, the answer was yes. The answer
was yes!"
"WITH
THAT PROFOUND THOUGHT, THE ROBOT REACHES INTO A CONTROL PANEL IN HIS LOWER
BACK, AND QUIETLY TURNS HIMSELF OFF."
