Chapter Seven: No Need for Final Fantasy
Note: I am continuing this fic after a looooooong break from this series. I realized that so many ppl wanted more, so here goes!
[As in all the preivious chapters, our heroes, now with the adjusting of a few characters, are still lost, and rather tired of killing people from other shows.]
Sephiroth: Can't the author find something better for us to do?
Author: Hey, you try writing a multi-chaptered humor story with crossovers!
Yuffie: I did! But you said it was stupid!
Red XIII: I read it. It was worse than this...
Tifa: Hey, *looks at the author* what ever happened to the narrator?
Shera: Narrator? Who's that?
Tifa: The narrator we had in the first chapter.
Cloud: Haven't you heard?
Cid: What the @%^ are you talkin' about?!
Aeris: The narrator went with us one time when we died, but the author forgot to reincarnate him.
Cait: Yes dammit!! DEATH DEATH!!!! AHHAHHAHHHAHHAA!!!!!!!!!!!
Vincent: *glares at Cait* He's still on drugs, isn't he?
Author: I like him better this way.
Sephiroth: Then you have more problems than we thought.
Author: Better believe it, Angel-Boy!
Aeris: Uh...is there a story?
Author: Oi...Pink Blob is right.
[Aeris is suddenly disiegrated by a flash of light.]
Yuffie: Isn't that conveinent.
[The flash of light stops. It reveals itself to be a girl with light blue hair.]
Cloud: [drooling] Wow...she's pretty...
Girl: [frowns] Who are you?
Vincent: We're travellers on a road angels, and anyone with more common sense than a potato, fear to tread.
Cid: Translation...we're lost.
Girl: Oh. Why didn't you say so. I'm Ryoko.
Cloud: [lovestruck] And I'm yours...
[Cloud gets zapped by a laser.]
Red: Who saw that coming?
[Everyone but Ryoko raises their hands.]
Shera: What was that anyways?
[A shorter girl, with red hair, appears from the bushes, holding a complicated-looking machine.]
Ryoko: And this is Washu.
Washu: Charmed.
Seohiroth: That was cool. Can I try that thing?
Washu: No.
Ryoko: If you're lost, we can take you to Tenchi. He can probably help.
Tifa: Sounds like a plan.
[The group follows Ryoko and Washu. Tifa tries to talk to the others.]
Tifa: [whispers] Now, DON'T kill anyone, got it?
Everyone: [answers like little schoolkids] Yes Ma'am.
[They come to a busy house, where they are greeted by a purple-haired girl, a younger girl with blue hair, a blond with darker skin and a boy who looked out of place.]
Ryoko: Found them near the woods.
Washu: I had to zap one of them. The others don't seem to mind.
Tenchi: Where do you all come from?
Cait: Hell.
Red: [shoots Cait an angry look] We're from another universe. That might sound strange...
Ayeka(purple-haired girl): Not really.
Mioshi(blond): Are you aliens too?
Sasami(younger): Oh! What planet are you from?!
Tenchi: [sighs] So much for cover...
Vincent: Actually, we're not aliens.
Washu: Great going guys, now we have to kill them too.
Tifa: What?
Ryoko: Yeah. We gotta keep our secret. Don't want to have the FBI over here...
Shera: You've got to be joking...
Tenchi: Sorry about this..
[The Tenchi cast advances toward the group. Suddenly, a loud belch is heard, stopping all.]
Red: Sorry. That little rabbit thing squirmed too much.
Sasami: [o.O] Ryo-oh-ki?! YOU ATE HER?!
Red: My bad.
[Sasami changes into Magical Girl Pretty Sammy]
Sammy: Now you will pay!
Cid: I thought we could get through one #@%$in' episode without havin' to kill.
Sephiroth: [grabs Massy] Heh heh...fresh meat...
[Tifa gives up trying to stop the fight and sits in a corner. The FF battle music plays n the background.]
Everyone: ????
Author: Sorry...Winamp obssession...
[Sammy prepares to use her weapon on Red, but is stopped by Yuffie tossing her shuriken at her, lopping her head clean off.]
Ayeka: SASAMI!!!!!
[Ayeka goes into battle mode and starts pummeling Yuffie. Sephiroth does a jump-lunge and stabs Ayeka midair.]
Shera: [sighs] It's getting gruesome again...
Cid: That's what the people like!
[He spears Mihoshi by surprise.]
Vincent: I refuse to take part in the killing of females.
Tenchi: What about me?
[Tenchi does all these fancy sword moves and such. Vin looks at him calmly, then tqakes out Death Penalty and kills him].
Vincent: No, no quams with killing you.
Cait: [yelling through his mega phone] And the score is 4 to zip, FF favor!
[Washu aims her laser at him, but the toy flips, landing on the machinery. The weapon frizzes out.]
Washu: What?!
Cait: I'm a toy! It's like putting a magnet on your computer screen!
[He then proceeds to fwap her silly with his megaphone.]
Tifa: [from her corner] This author needs to get some help...
Author: Hey, I tried. They said I was hopeless...
Tifa: For good reason.
Author: :P
[Ryoko avoids the FF cast's attacks by transporting back and forth.]
Ryoko: Is that all ya got?! HA!!
Shera: Oh, for heaven's sake...
[She holds up a frying pan right where Ryoko teleports to, knocking her unconcious.]
Red: Well that was kind of cool.
Yuffie: Get her!
Vincent: [stops them] That won't be neccesary.
Cait: Why not? We should finish her!
Vincent: She is unconcious. As is Washu. This will allow us time to escape.
[Everyone starts to protest, but they are cut off by Cid.]
Cid: Everybody shut the $%^^ up! Vin's right, let's just leave.
Sephiroth: [pouts] Stickin' up for him again...
Shera: [frowns at Seph] Ok, tha's getting very old...
[Cid, Vincent and Sephiroth all blush.]
Author: *cackle*
Tifa: [returns from her corner] You're never going to solve this triangle, are you?
Author: I already have. I just don't tell, 'cause I don't wanna disappoint anyone.
Vincent: You're driving me insane.
Red: I suggest we go before they wake up.
[So, our heroes continue thier journey into the unkown.]
Yuffie: I still wanna know the Vin/Cid/Seph thing...
Author: Tough.
Cid/Vincent/Sephiroth: [flash the author kawaii chibi eyes] Pu- lllleeeeeeeeeeze?????
Author: [.] Don't DO that!!! For one thing, I can't resist the eyes, and for the other, when Cid does it, it's just creepy!
Cait: She's gonna tell! I'm takin' all bets!
Shera: I take Vin and Cid.
Yuffie: I pick Vin and Seph.
Red: I think it's Cid and Seph.
[Everyone stares at him]
Red: What?
Author: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell....
All: Yes???
Author: I'M NOT TELLING!!!! NYA!!
[Everyone falls anime-ishly.]
Author: I'm gonna let the public decide. Vote in your reviews and the winner will be the couple!
Vincent: I'm doomed.
Shera: I think this is a good place to end.
Author: I agree.
~Fin!
Notes: Back on track now. I know a lot more 'bout animes now, so expect some new chapters. And the voting thing IS real!!! So R&R!!!
~KCSS
Note: I am continuing this fic after a looooooong break from this series. I realized that so many ppl wanted more, so here goes!
[As in all the preivious chapters, our heroes, now with the adjusting of a few characters, are still lost, and rather tired of killing people from other shows.]
Sephiroth: Can't the author find something better for us to do?
Author: Hey, you try writing a multi-chaptered humor story with crossovers!
Yuffie: I did! But you said it was stupid!
Red XIII: I read it. It was worse than this...
Tifa: Hey, *looks at the author* what ever happened to the narrator?
Shera: Narrator? Who's that?
Tifa: The narrator we had in the first chapter.
Cloud: Haven't you heard?
Cid: What the @%^ are you talkin' about?!
Aeris: The narrator went with us one time when we died, but the author forgot to reincarnate him.
Cait: Yes dammit!! DEATH DEATH!!!! AHHAHHAHHHAHHAA!!!!!!!!!!!
Vincent: *glares at Cait* He's still on drugs, isn't he?
Author: I like him better this way.
Sephiroth: Then you have more problems than we thought.
Author: Better believe it, Angel-Boy!
Aeris: Uh...is there a story?
Author: Oi...Pink Blob is right.
[Aeris is suddenly disiegrated by a flash of light.]
Yuffie: Isn't that conveinent.
[The flash of light stops. It reveals itself to be a girl with light blue hair.]
Cloud: [drooling] Wow...she's pretty...
Girl: [frowns] Who are you?
Vincent: We're travellers on a road angels, and anyone with more common sense than a potato, fear to tread.
Cid: Translation...we're lost.
Girl: Oh. Why didn't you say so. I'm Ryoko.
Cloud: [lovestruck] And I'm yours...
[Cloud gets zapped by a laser.]
Red: Who saw that coming?
[Everyone but Ryoko raises their hands.]
Shera: What was that anyways?
[A shorter girl, with red hair, appears from the bushes, holding a complicated-looking machine.]
Ryoko: And this is Washu.
Washu: Charmed.
Seohiroth: That was cool. Can I try that thing?
Washu: No.
Ryoko: If you're lost, we can take you to Tenchi. He can probably help.
Tifa: Sounds like a plan.
[The group follows Ryoko and Washu. Tifa tries to talk to the others.]
Tifa: [whispers] Now, DON'T kill anyone, got it?
Everyone: [answers like little schoolkids] Yes Ma'am.
[They come to a busy house, where they are greeted by a purple-haired girl, a younger girl with blue hair, a blond with darker skin and a boy who looked out of place.]
Ryoko: Found them near the woods.
Washu: I had to zap one of them. The others don't seem to mind.
Tenchi: Where do you all come from?
Cait: Hell.
Red: [shoots Cait an angry look] We're from another universe. That might sound strange...
Ayeka(purple-haired girl): Not really.
Mioshi(blond): Are you aliens too?
Sasami(younger): Oh! What planet are you from?!
Tenchi: [sighs] So much for cover...
Vincent: Actually, we're not aliens.
Washu: Great going guys, now we have to kill them too.
Tifa: What?
Ryoko: Yeah. We gotta keep our secret. Don't want to have the FBI over here...
Shera: You've got to be joking...
Tenchi: Sorry about this..
[The Tenchi cast advances toward the group. Suddenly, a loud belch is heard, stopping all.]
Red: Sorry. That little rabbit thing squirmed too much.
Sasami: [o.O] Ryo-oh-ki?! YOU ATE HER?!
Red: My bad.
[Sasami changes into Magical Girl Pretty Sammy]
Sammy: Now you will pay!
Cid: I thought we could get through one #@%$in' episode without havin' to kill.
Sephiroth: [grabs Massy] Heh heh...fresh meat...
[Tifa gives up trying to stop the fight and sits in a corner. The FF battle music plays n the background.]
Everyone: ????
Author: Sorry...Winamp obssession...
[Sammy prepares to use her weapon on Red, but is stopped by Yuffie tossing her shuriken at her, lopping her head clean off.]
Ayeka: SASAMI!!!!!
[Ayeka goes into battle mode and starts pummeling Yuffie. Sephiroth does a jump-lunge and stabs Ayeka midair.]
Shera: [sighs] It's getting gruesome again...
Cid: That's what the people like!
[He spears Mihoshi by surprise.]
Vincent: I refuse to take part in the killing of females.
Tenchi: What about me?
[Tenchi does all these fancy sword moves and such. Vin looks at him calmly, then tqakes out Death Penalty and kills him].
Vincent: No, no quams with killing you.
Cait: [yelling through his mega phone] And the score is 4 to zip, FF favor!
[Washu aims her laser at him, but the toy flips, landing on the machinery. The weapon frizzes out.]
Washu: What?!
Cait: I'm a toy! It's like putting a magnet on your computer screen!
[He then proceeds to fwap her silly with his megaphone.]
Tifa: [from her corner] This author needs to get some help...
Author: Hey, I tried. They said I was hopeless...
Tifa: For good reason.
Author: :P
[Ryoko avoids the FF cast's attacks by transporting back and forth.]
Ryoko: Is that all ya got?! HA!!
Shera: Oh, for heaven's sake...
[She holds up a frying pan right where Ryoko teleports to, knocking her unconcious.]
Red: Well that was kind of cool.
Yuffie: Get her!
Vincent: [stops them] That won't be neccesary.
Cait: Why not? We should finish her!
Vincent: She is unconcious. As is Washu. This will allow us time to escape.
[Everyone starts to protest, but they are cut off by Cid.]
Cid: Everybody shut the $%^^ up! Vin's right, let's just leave.
Sephiroth: [pouts] Stickin' up for him again...
Shera: [frowns at Seph] Ok, tha's getting very old...
[Cid, Vincent and Sephiroth all blush.]
Author: *cackle*
Tifa: [returns from her corner] You're never going to solve this triangle, are you?
Author: I already have. I just don't tell, 'cause I don't wanna disappoint anyone.
Vincent: You're driving me insane.
Red: I suggest we go before they wake up.
[So, our heroes continue thier journey into the unkown.]
Yuffie: I still wanna know the Vin/Cid/Seph thing...
Author: Tough.
Cid/Vincent/Sephiroth: [flash the author kawaii chibi eyes] Pu- lllleeeeeeeeeeze?????
Author: [.] Don't DO that!!! For one thing, I can't resist the eyes, and for the other, when Cid does it, it's just creepy!
Cait: She's gonna tell! I'm takin' all bets!
Shera: I take Vin and Cid.
Yuffie: I pick Vin and Seph.
Red: I think it's Cid and Seph.
[Everyone stares at him]
Red: What?
Author: Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell....
All: Yes???
Author: I'M NOT TELLING!!!! NYA!!
[Everyone falls anime-ishly.]
Author: I'm gonna let the public decide. Vote in your reviews and the winner will be the couple!
Vincent: I'm doomed.
Shera: I think this is a good place to end.
Author: I agree.
~Fin!
Notes: Back on track now. I know a lot more 'bout animes now, so expect some new chapters. And the voting thing IS real!!! So R&R!!!
~KCSS