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[Yet again, our heroes are treking through teh world of T.V. shows.] Cloud: When are we gonna get out of Anime land again? Vincent: As soon as the authoress decides to do a non-anime show. Author: And ya know what guys? Author: We're makin' some changes here. [The group lets out a collective girlish scream.] Author: I'm replacing Barret. [Barret disappears. Shera comes in his place.] Author: Good. And now, you guys are going into one of the most feared places known to anyone above Kindergarden level...The Land of Public Television!!! [laughs evilly] So, go! [Everyone trudges along. Suddenly, a small furry thing sets down on Shera's head. She screams and throws it across the road.] Thing: Well that wasn't very nice. Tifa: What the heck is that? Sephiroth: Follow it! It probably knows the way out! Red XIII: You just want something to kill, don't you? Sephiroth: Problem with that? [Everyone races behind the furry creature. It leads them to a house-looking building. The creature hops inside. Our heroes wait near the door, listening to who's inside.] Thing: I met some interesting creatures today! Voice 2 : [mutters] As if we really care... [The thing starts singing horribly. The group bursts through the door.] Cait Sith: BOO!!!!! Hahahahahahhaa!! [They see the thing and two guys.] Guys 1: Are they who you saw Zaboomafo? Thing (Apparantly named Zaboomafo): Yes! Cid: Who the @#$^%& are you? [The two introduce themselves as Chris and Martin.] Sephiroth: Well, we came here to kill the furry thing. Martin: NO! You can't do that! Vincent: I know what Zaboomafo actually means... Vincent: Yes. Translated, it means "Crackhead Puppet Lemur". Cait: Yes Dammit! CRACK CRACK!!!!! [Everyone glares at Cait, then realizes he's been drugged up.] Author: [shrugs] I wanted him hyper. Tifa: I'm sure we can discuss this in a calm manner... Sephiroth: [slices Zaboomafo in half with Masamune] Calm? What's that? Martin: You killed Zaboo! Everyone else: [automatically] You Bastard! Chris: [just for something to do] Attack, clay demons! Obey your master!!! Yuffie: Cool! Witchcraft! [All the little clay things start to latch onto the characters.] Shera: [throwing a few of them] They won't die! [One of them knocks Aeris into the lake. She doesn't come back up. Another latches onto Vincent's face, so he can't berathe.] Cid: Oh no ya don't, ya @#^!! [He grabs the little clay demon off of Vince's face and stabs him.] Author: [smiles as audience glares at her] Yuppers. Sephiroth: [pouts] But what about me? Tifa: Never mind your love life right now! We've got to kill these things! [Suddenly, the door bursts open. Rufus and the Turks stand there, looking all cool and stuff. They all hold flame-throwers.] Reno: Everyone throw them into one place! [The one clay thing with the drill for a head (ack...) lunges at Cloud, drilling a hole straight through him. The rest of the cast manages to hoard the demons into one corner, where the Turks fry them like pottery.] Chris: Well, that was kinda cool. Martin: No!! We won't be defeated!! [He is hit by a dictionary.] [He turns to see the FF7 group, all staring at Shera, who is smiling.] Martin: [dizzily] Who...threw...that...?? [Another book flies at him. With his last bit of conciousness, he reads the title: "Webster's Ultra-Thick Second Edition Dictionary".] [Shera takes a bow. Everyone turns to Chris] Chris: I don't care. I'm letting you guys get out of here before the PBS police get here. Yuffie: It's the cops! Cheese it!! [Everyone runs out of the building, just as sirens are heard. The group returns to their aimless wandering.] Elena: Well, that was strange... Tifa: Hey, thanks for helping us back there. Rufus: No problem. It was fun! Tseng: We should probably go now. Reno: We'll see ya 'round! Cait: How duya suppose they do that? Author: My world...my rules... Sephiroth: Now I think is a good time to discuss the author's coupling preference... Author: >.>...<.<...Nope. I gave enough hints. I never explain anything outright. Author: It gives me an air of mysteriousness... Author: ...And I don't wanna. Cait: No Dammit! TELL TELL!!! HAHAHHAHHAHA!!!! [Yuffie whacks Cait on the back of the head.] Cid: How in the @#%^ did this get started anyways? Author: It involves a vacation, free printing, and some yaoi doujinshi... Shera: I don't wanna know... A/N: Yes, I'm addicted. If you don't know what I'm talking about, I now have a new coupling preference, and I'll be darned if I care what everyone else thinks!! This is what happens when your summer break resorts to watching public television. And, for the people who keep giving me ideas, thank you! But most of the shows everyone wants me to do, I know not much to nothing about the characters. So, if you really want to go the distance, you can e-mail me some decriptions of the character's quirks at
[email protected]. Otherwise, you'll just have to stick to what I know. Ja ne!! ^-^ |
Crossovers Fom Hell (and How to Cope With Them)
By: Karu Leonnese