Sariel: How did Irwin become King of the Faeries?
I really messed around with stuff here. I got the fairies wrong, I played with events, I switched... Oh, you get the idea. I already told you people not to think too hard about this stuff, didn't I?!
Irwin stalked through a flowered meadow, his mind aflame, body tensed, one thought in his mind. "How DARE he?"
Escad had really done it this time... Irwin had only intended to free Matilda, and this is his repayment? Escad got what he deserved by falling into the underworld. But Matilda... He began to angrily force the thought out of his mind, but it was quickly done for him by a small creature appearing in front of his face, which shouted "HI!" at the top of its tiny lungs. This distraction caused Irwin to slip and fall, tumbling down the slope at a dangerous pace. The fairy followed, squealing "WHEEE!"
Irwin rose to his feet, glowering. The fairy, however, found the whole matter of a large, hairy, creature glaring at him/her rather amusing, especially since the downhill tumble had covered him in flowers. The effect was something like a perturbed yeti wearing a flowery bath robe.
"What is the meaning of this?" Irwin demanded.
"I wanted to play a game!" responded the fairy.
"I have no time for games. Begone," growled Irwin, now in an even fouler mood.
"But I wanna play tag! Or hide-and-go-seek! Or soldier!"
"Soldier?" A spark of an idea had begun to form in Irwin's mind. "Alright, soldier! Take me to your barracks!"
"Bare WHAT?!" the fairy squeaked.
Irwin sighed. "The place where all the other soldiers are," he explained.
"Oohhhh! Okay! Jump in that ring of mushrooms! I'll follow you!"
The flower-festooned half-demon shambled over to the ring of mushrooms and gingerly stepped inside. Nothing happened. "Well?" he demanded.
"Oh, I forgot! You have to do the magic dance!" The fairy clapped in anticipation.
The thought of an army of fairies is all that kept Irwin from crushing the little mocking whelp, hovering inches from his face. After being led through the steps of something vaguely resembling disco, Irwin felt himself falling... And opened his eyes, finding himself surrounded by fairies in a much more colorful, but otherwise unchanged landscape.
"We're playing soldier!" his guide shouted excitedly. The fairies all set to giggling, and instantly formed ranks in front of Irwin.
"Excellent..." he chuckled. "Now, my army... We will destroy the world! Go forth, march, bring death and mayhem to the foolish mortal men!"
The fairies stared at each other, confused. Irwin sighed.
"Go play really MEAN tricks on people, I meant. And keep a straight face. And look out for the long-haired psychopath."
"Yes, sir!" the fairies chorused, fighting down a fit of the giggles as they marched forth into Fa'Diel to bring death, destruction, mayhem, and a good deal of mischeif along the way.
I really messed around with stuff here. I got the fairies wrong, I played with events, I switched... Oh, you get the idea. I already told you people not to think too hard about this stuff, didn't I?!
Irwin stalked through a flowered meadow, his mind aflame, body tensed, one thought in his mind. "How DARE he?"
Escad had really done it this time... Irwin had only intended to free Matilda, and this is his repayment? Escad got what he deserved by falling into the underworld. But Matilda... He began to angrily force the thought out of his mind, but it was quickly done for him by a small creature appearing in front of his face, which shouted "HI!" at the top of its tiny lungs. This distraction caused Irwin to slip and fall, tumbling down the slope at a dangerous pace. The fairy followed, squealing "WHEEE!"
Irwin rose to his feet, glowering. The fairy, however, found the whole matter of a large, hairy, creature glaring at him/her rather amusing, especially since the downhill tumble had covered him in flowers. The effect was something like a perturbed yeti wearing a flowery bath robe.
"What is the meaning of this?" Irwin demanded.
"I wanted to play a game!" responded the fairy.
"I have no time for games. Begone," growled Irwin, now in an even fouler mood.
"But I wanna play tag! Or hide-and-go-seek! Or soldier!"
"Soldier?" A spark of an idea had begun to form in Irwin's mind. "Alright, soldier! Take me to your barracks!"
"Bare WHAT?!" the fairy squeaked.
Irwin sighed. "The place where all the other soldiers are," he explained.
"Oohhhh! Okay! Jump in that ring of mushrooms! I'll follow you!"
The flower-festooned half-demon shambled over to the ring of mushrooms and gingerly stepped inside. Nothing happened. "Well?" he demanded.
"Oh, I forgot! You have to do the magic dance!" The fairy clapped in anticipation.
The thought of an army of fairies is all that kept Irwin from crushing the little mocking whelp, hovering inches from his face. After being led through the steps of something vaguely resembling disco, Irwin felt himself falling... And opened his eyes, finding himself surrounded by fairies in a much more colorful, but otherwise unchanged landscape.
"We're playing soldier!" his guide shouted excitedly. The fairies all set to giggling, and instantly formed ranks in front of Irwin.
"Excellent..." he chuckled. "Now, my army... We will destroy the world! Go forth, march, bring death and mayhem to the foolish mortal men!"
The fairies stared at each other, confused. Irwin sighed.
"Go play really MEAN tricks on people, I meant. And keep a straight face. And look out for the long-haired psychopath."
"Yes, sir!" the fairies chorused, fighting down a fit of the giggles as they marched forth into Fa'Diel to bring death, destruction, mayhem, and a good deal of mischeif along the way.