Never Knew You
Chapter 8
Notes: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I felt so special! ^.^ And in response to one of said reviews, I love keeping you guys in suspense! It makes everyone keep reading! AND this chapter is the LONGEST yet! Keep them reviews comin guys, I'm a sucker for compliments! And I just noticed that my italics aren't comin' through, so all of Chaos' thoughts look like bad puctuation. -.-o
And on another note, GGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMEEEEEEENNNNN!!!!!!! I'm working slow on this for two reasons: 1) So many people want an update, but after my comp was taken away for awhile, they're probably wanting to kill me, and 2) I've got total writer's block. Bear with me folks! It's not that I hate writing this fic, it's just so hard for me to get serious enough to write a chapter of this! I gotta be good and angsty! ^.^
*is stampeeded by purple Chocobos* O.X...You know that happens more times than I'd like...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"What do you suppose that is?" Cid rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
"I have no idea Highwind," Vincent replied, "But we'll find out soon enough I think."
"@#$%..."
"I'm inclined to agree..." he sat back down.
Cid laughed and joined his friend. Both were quiet. Each were avoiding the conversation they knew would occur. Vincent stared at the rain outside the cave, while Cid hummed quietly and looked around the cave.
Cold, damp stone walls greeted his gaze. He felt helpless. He wanted to save Vin, and save himself. There was nothing he could do but wait until gods-know-what outside would finally find the two.
"@#$% it!" he yelled without thinking, and punched the ground. Hard.
"Highwind!?" Vincent whirled to face him, surprised at the outburst.
The pilot cradled his now sore hand. "(*&^...Sorry Vin. Lost it for a minute..."
Vincent stared at him a moment longer, before turning to the side, his hair falling from his shoulders to mask his expresion. "Highwind...I'm sorry."
Cid gave him an odd look "What? What the @#$% Vin?"
"I know...I know I must be hurting you. That's why you're upset."
'Classic Vincent angst..' Cid thought, then replied, "Vin, you gotta be kidding me. How can you even THINK that?"
"I don't know."
Looking over, Cid couldn't see Vincent's face behind the curtain of black hair, although he knew that the stoic was crying, or on the verge of tears. "%$^# Vin...I...I don't @#$%in' kiss people that hurt me..."
Vincent turned to face him, liquid crystal rimming crimson eyes.
Cid took the silence as a means to continue. He had already said this much, he might as well spill it all. "Listen Vin, I might be way outta line here...and I have no idea where this is going..."
"Then don't say it," the other blurted.
"What?"
"If you're not sure, then don't say it. You shouldn't say things that you're not sure about." Vincent returned his gaze to the storm, eyes seeming almost to stare past the rain.
"@#$%..." he repeated yet again.
Vincent sighed heavily. Why was he crying? "I apologize. I only say that beacause...usually when someone says that sort of thing, they're planning on giving bad news. And there's only one piece of news that would be bad for me..." He let the sentence drop.
The other shook his head. "It's not-"
"You're probably not going to say it directly...you'll want to spare my feelings...But you're thinking of how much better it would have been if we had never met."
Cid was deeply hurt at this statement. "Jesus @#$%in' Christ Vin! How can you say somethin like that?!"
"I almost got you killed...now we're stuck here, because of me." he seemed to be just talking. His eyes were glazed over, still staring at the horizon. Cid crossed his arms and exhaled a breath sharply.
"If I wished that, would I have followed you here?"
Vincent remained silent at this, wanting to believe that he was wrong. Wanting to believe that the pilot really did care, really looked past what he was. But years of self-loathing and Chaos' constant taunting made him think otherwise. 'He doesn't know what he's saying...'
Which was exactly what Cid was thinking as well. 'He doesn't know what he's saying...Vin's got that Chaos @#$%^ telling him things that aren't true...' He needed something to convince his friend that what he ws saying was the truth. But the blond wasn't used to this type of thinking. Such things came naturally to other people, but Cid had never trained his mind for an emotional thought process. Too easy to just brush anyone off with a curse and an angry glance.
But since he had met the frail personage that had come to be his constant companion, he had been trying. It was frusterating work, but it was worth it to Cid, just to help Vincent become less of a self-hating angst pile. It always worried him, to think that Vincent might just one day kill himself.
The pilot shook his head violently and ran a hand through his hair. He didn't need to think of these things now. He needed to think of a way to get them of this gods-forsaken rock. And hopefully think of a way to help Vincent.
But as previously stated, Cid was a man of action, not of thought.
"The rain is slowing down..." Vincent said, that monotone creeping into his voice again.
"Don't talk like that," Cid mumbled.
"Like what?"
"That god@#$%ed tone of voice you use. It drives me %^%&in' crazy..." He leaned into a half-laying position, his back against a large stone and crossed his arms.
Vincent cleared his throat. "I...apologize." The tone was almost the same, but Cid could hear a bit of meaning through the monotone.
"That's better. Thanks." He couldn't think of anything better to say than that? How was he supposed to help Vincent, if he couldn't think of something better to say than 'Thanks that's better'...?
The rain outside the cavern went slowly from thunderstorm to rain, then finally to light drizzle. The cave was chilled by the dampness of the world outside, as well, as it seemed to the two, by the silences that prevailed. It was pitch-black in the catacombs of Lucrecia's Cave. And it was almost the same in the sky outside. Besides the occasional remainder of lightning, it was dark. The dark, cold, and silence gave room for thought.
And one thought wove itsself through Cid's mind...
~'It would have been better if you never knew me...'~
"You don't know that," Cid blurted, answering aloud the voice in his head.
Vincent turned to face him, confused. "What?"
Realizing he had spoken, the pilot decided it was time to end this. "You don't know...if it would have been better if we never met. I don't think that. And you shouldn't."
"Highwind..." Vincent began.
But Cid was ready to talk. He might not have been much for words, but when he wanted to talk, there was no stopping him. He shook his head, which silenced the other. "@#$% Vin...if we'd never met, I don't know what the %$^^ I'd be like by now. But worse off, I can tell you that. And (*&^, you'd probably still be in that coffin of yours!"
"That might have been better..."
Cid clenched his hands into fists in frusteration. "Don't SAY that! It's not true, okay?! Gods, Vin! I don't know what that #$%^in' demon of yours has been tellin you, but there ARE people who don't think you're some kind of monster!!"
It was there that he stopped. Not because he had run out of things to say. Quite the contrary, he could go on forever, it seemed. But he didn't like the way it was going. He was getting angry again, and that was only going to push Vincent away further. He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself.
Vincent took this oppourtunity to speak. "You...you don't know what it's like, Highwind...Chaos..."
"You're right," Cid continued, quieter and less threatening than before, "I don't know what it's like. But I do know that what he's telling you is all lies. He tells you that no one cares, that you're not good enough to be alive. But he's WRONG."
Vincent looked at him with an almost pleading look. "Highwind...how do you know...?"
Cid stood up. "You wanna know how I know? I'll tell ya...I know people care about you because I do."
Not even Chaos could counter that remark.
However, there was one thing that could stop this tender moment.
"If I never knew you...that's so touching, it sounds like a song..." A sickeningly familiar voice behind them mused.
Both turned to see Hojo standing in the cave, trapping them.
"@#$%!!!" Cid cursed. Vincent gasped.
"I believe you should have killed me when you had the chance, Valentine," Hojo smirked, and turned to Cid, "Ahh...nice to see my speciman is still functioning."
"He is NOT your speciman..." Vincent managed in a low growl.
Hojo sneered at him. "So...you finally managed to talk to me...you must care a lot for this friend of yours..."
"Leave him the @#$% alone!" Cid snapped.
"Hojo, I warn you, you will either leave us both be..." Vincent stood, alarmed at the fact that his enemy was probably about to try and force them back to his lab and hurt Cid again, "...or I swear by everthing in my power, I will make you wish I HAD killed you..."
To be continued...
Notes: Betcha didn't expect Hojo to come back, DIDJA?!?!
And don't worry, I'm back on track with this thing...updates will be faster (so I hope)!!
~Karu ^.^ \/
Chapter 8
Notes: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I felt so special! ^.^ And in response to one of said reviews, I love keeping you guys in suspense! It makes everyone keep reading! AND this chapter is the LONGEST yet! Keep them reviews comin guys, I'm a sucker for compliments! And I just noticed that my italics aren't comin' through, so all of Chaos' thoughts look like bad puctuation. -.-o
And on another note, GGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMEEEEEEENNNNN!!!!!!! I'm working slow on this for two reasons: 1) So many people want an update, but after my comp was taken away for awhile, they're probably wanting to kill me, and 2) I've got total writer's block. Bear with me folks! It's not that I hate writing this fic, it's just so hard for me to get serious enough to write a chapter of this! I gotta be good and angsty! ^.^
*is stampeeded by purple Chocobos* O.X...You know that happens more times than I'd like...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"What do you suppose that is?" Cid rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
"I have no idea Highwind," Vincent replied, "But we'll find out soon enough I think."
"@#$%..."
"I'm inclined to agree..." he sat back down.
Cid laughed and joined his friend. Both were quiet. Each were avoiding the conversation they knew would occur. Vincent stared at the rain outside the cave, while Cid hummed quietly and looked around the cave.
Cold, damp stone walls greeted his gaze. He felt helpless. He wanted to save Vin, and save himself. There was nothing he could do but wait until gods-know-what outside would finally find the two.
"@#$% it!" he yelled without thinking, and punched the ground. Hard.
"Highwind!?" Vincent whirled to face him, surprised at the outburst.
The pilot cradled his now sore hand. "(*&^...Sorry Vin. Lost it for a minute..."
Vincent stared at him a moment longer, before turning to the side, his hair falling from his shoulders to mask his expresion. "Highwind...I'm sorry."
Cid gave him an odd look "What? What the @#$% Vin?"
"I know...I know I must be hurting you. That's why you're upset."
'Classic Vincent angst..' Cid thought, then replied, "Vin, you gotta be kidding me. How can you even THINK that?"
"I don't know."
Looking over, Cid couldn't see Vincent's face behind the curtain of black hair, although he knew that the stoic was crying, or on the verge of tears. "%$^# Vin...I...I don't @#$%in' kiss people that hurt me..."
Vincent turned to face him, liquid crystal rimming crimson eyes.
Cid took the silence as a means to continue. He had already said this much, he might as well spill it all. "Listen Vin, I might be way outta line here...and I have no idea where this is going..."
"Then don't say it," the other blurted.
"What?"
"If you're not sure, then don't say it. You shouldn't say things that you're not sure about." Vincent returned his gaze to the storm, eyes seeming almost to stare past the rain.
"@#$%..." he repeated yet again.
Vincent sighed heavily. Why was he crying? "I apologize. I only say that beacause...usually when someone says that sort of thing, they're planning on giving bad news. And there's only one piece of news that would be bad for me..." He let the sentence drop.
The other shook his head. "It's not-"
"You're probably not going to say it directly...you'll want to spare my feelings...But you're thinking of how much better it would have been if we had never met."
Cid was deeply hurt at this statement. "Jesus @#$%in' Christ Vin! How can you say somethin like that?!"
"I almost got you killed...now we're stuck here, because of me." he seemed to be just talking. His eyes were glazed over, still staring at the horizon. Cid crossed his arms and exhaled a breath sharply.
"If I wished that, would I have followed you here?"
Vincent remained silent at this, wanting to believe that he was wrong. Wanting to believe that the pilot really did care, really looked past what he was. But years of self-loathing and Chaos' constant taunting made him think otherwise. 'He doesn't know what he's saying...'
Which was exactly what Cid was thinking as well. 'He doesn't know what he's saying...Vin's got that Chaos @#$%^ telling him things that aren't true...' He needed something to convince his friend that what he ws saying was the truth. But the blond wasn't used to this type of thinking. Such things came naturally to other people, but Cid had never trained his mind for an emotional thought process. Too easy to just brush anyone off with a curse and an angry glance.
But since he had met the frail personage that had come to be his constant companion, he had been trying. It was frusterating work, but it was worth it to Cid, just to help Vincent become less of a self-hating angst pile. It always worried him, to think that Vincent might just one day kill himself.
The pilot shook his head violently and ran a hand through his hair. He didn't need to think of these things now. He needed to think of a way to get them of this gods-forsaken rock. And hopefully think of a way to help Vincent.
But as previously stated, Cid was a man of action, not of thought.
"The rain is slowing down..." Vincent said, that monotone creeping into his voice again.
"Don't talk like that," Cid mumbled.
"Like what?"
"That god@#$%ed tone of voice you use. It drives me %^%&in' crazy..." He leaned into a half-laying position, his back against a large stone and crossed his arms.
Vincent cleared his throat. "I...apologize." The tone was almost the same, but Cid could hear a bit of meaning through the monotone.
"That's better. Thanks." He couldn't think of anything better to say than that? How was he supposed to help Vincent, if he couldn't think of something better to say than 'Thanks that's better'...?
The rain outside the cavern went slowly from thunderstorm to rain, then finally to light drizzle. The cave was chilled by the dampness of the world outside, as well, as it seemed to the two, by the silences that prevailed. It was pitch-black in the catacombs of Lucrecia's Cave. And it was almost the same in the sky outside. Besides the occasional remainder of lightning, it was dark. The dark, cold, and silence gave room for thought.
And one thought wove itsself through Cid's mind...
~'It would have been better if you never knew me...'~
"You don't know that," Cid blurted, answering aloud the voice in his head.
Vincent turned to face him, confused. "What?"
Realizing he had spoken, the pilot decided it was time to end this. "You don't know...if it would have been better if we never met. I don't think that. And you shouldn't."
"Highwind..." Vincent began.
But Cid was ready to talk. He might not have been much for words, but when he wanted to talk, there was no stopping him. He shook his head, which silenced the other. "@#$% Vin...if we'd never met, I don't know what the %$^^ I'd be like by now. But worse off, I can tell you that. And (*&^, you'd probably still be in that coffin of yours!"
"That might have been better..."
Cid clenched his hands into fists in frusteration. "Don't SAY that! It's not true, okay?! Gods, Vin! I don't know what that #$%^in' demon of yours has been tellin you, but there ARE people who don't think you're some kind of monster!!"
It was there that he stopped. Not because he had run out of things to say. Quite the contrary, he could go on forever, it seemed. But he didn't like the way it was going. He was getting angry again, and that was only going to push Vincent away further. He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself.
Vincent took this oppourtunity to speak. "You...you don't know what it's like, Highwind...Chaos..."
"You're right," Cid continued, quieter and less threatening than before, "I don't know what it's like. But I do know that what he's telling you is all lies. He tells you that no one cares, that you're not good enough to be alive. But he's WRONG."
Vincent looked at him with an almost pleading look. "Highwind...how do you know...?"
Cid stood up. "You wanna know how I know? I'll tell ya...I know people care about you because I do."
Not even Chaos could counter that remark.
However, there was one thing that could stop this tender moment.
"If I never knew you...that's so touching, it sounds like a song..." A sickeningly familiar voice behind them mused.
Both turned to see Hojo standing in the cave, trapping them.
"@#$%!!!" Cid cursed. Vincent gasped.
"I believe you should have killed me when you had the chance, Valentine," Hojo smirked, and turned to Cid, "Ahh...nice to see my speciman is still functioning."
"He is NOT your speciman..." Vincent managed in a low growl.
Hojo sneered at him. "So...you finally managed to talk to me...you must care a lot for this friend of yours..."
"Leave him the @#$% alone!" Cid snapped.
"Hojo, I warn you, you will either leave us both be..." Vincent stood, alarmed at the fact that his enemy was probably about to try and force them back to his lab and hurt Cid again, "...or I swear by everthing in my power, I will make you wish I HAD killed you..."
To be continued...
Notes: Betcha didn't expect Hojo to come back, DIDJA?!?!
And don't worry, I'm back on track with this thing...updates will be faster (so I hope)!!
~Karu ^.^ \/