The Trouble With H
Chapter Nine: The Trouble With...Handcuffs
A/N: And now for the most innuendo-astic chappeh of the ficceh. [grins] ...If you need to beat anyone up with various livestock, do it to Pai, it's all her fault. I'm just the writer-monkey. [snickers] And since it's her idea, she gets the cameo. [winks] It's all good fun, right Pai-san? [uses Gojyo as a shield] Fifty points if you know where Gojyo's description of Pai came from!
Very minor warning, this chappeh gets a tad more on the citrus side. Not even an orange. Kiwi maybeh? Sadly, so far this this the closest thing I've ever written to pr0n (besides a poor attempt at a Digimon Kensuke that will never beh read by sentient eyes). Hee, I'm a wimp. [grins] Nineteen-wha? Anyway, nothing that anyone still reading this hasn't seen before.
---
"OW!" Goku yelped, holding his head. "What was that for?!"
Sanzo returned the fan to his sleeve. "For making us waste a day trying to find you."
Having spent the better part of the day in town, it was decided that it wasn't a good idea to drive on until they could devote an entire day to the journey. The land that lay ahead wasn't good for camping, and the next town was at least a day away. This pause put Sanzo in a very irratable mood, unfortunately for Goku.
"Well," Hakkai looked up in thought, "We've already gotten supplies, so we've got some time to kill I'm afraid."
"My favourite kind of time," Gojyo grinned, throwing an arm around Hakkai's shoulders. "What do you say we go look around for a good bar? A town like this has gotta have one."
"Rooms first, kappa," Sanzo said flatly. "Feed your addictions on your own time."
"If it makes you feel better, we could stay in the inn and keep you company," the redhead smiled, feigning concern.
Sanzo, walking a bit ahead of the other three, turned to look at Gojyo, who was still leaning on Hakkai. A slight smirk graced his features. "I wasn't talking about alcohol."
The two youkai blinked, giving each other a questioning look. Sanzo kept walking, as Hakkai's face flushed and Gojyo burst out into laughter.
Goku frowned to himself. "Then what -was- he talking about?"
They reached the inn then, leaving the boy with no answer to the question he probably didn't want answered anyway. Inside, the inn was as busy as the market had been. The four had to work their way to the front desk, past the milling crowd.
"Busy day?" Hakkai asked, narrowly dodging a small boy running past.
The innkeeper smiled. "Sorta. Most people are just here for the food." She leaned her head on her hand. She was in her mid-teens, with short auburn hair. Looking to all of them in turn, her smile grew wider. "I was wondering if you'd come by here."
"I beg your pardon?" Sanzo asked carefully.
"The name's Pai," she continued, "I've been hearing all these rumours ablout the imfamous Sanzo-ikkou. Glad you decided to stop here."
"Our reputation precedes us," Gojyo chuckled.
"Is that a good thing?" Goku wondered aloud.
Hakkai blinked. "Imfamous?"
Sanzo rolled his eyes, slapping the gold card on the desk in front of the girl. "Whatever. Can we get some rooms?"
"Sure," she shrugged, "But we've only got a couple single rooms left. Um, only two."
"We'll take them, please," Hakkai smiled politely.
Pai squealed excitedly. "This is so cool! Let me know if you guys need anything at all, okay?"
"Dinner?" Goku blurted out before anyone could stop him.
This seemed to amuse the girl even more. "In a few hours. I'll be sure to save a table for you all. It gets pretty full in here."
"Thanks," Gojyo nodded.
Pai squealed again.
---
"So..." the redhead laced his fingers behind his head, "Whatcha think of the chick at the counter?"
Gojyo, Hakkai and Goku, having left Sanzo to sulk in their room, walked through the town.
"She's nice," Goku said, looking through different vendors.
"Pai-san is rather zealous," Hakkai crossed his arms. "It's kind of sweet actually."
Gojyo laughed. "I think it's a bit more 'the call is coming from inside the house', if you know what I mean. But she's cool. It's nice to get some job perks."
"I'm still wondering about the 'imfamous' part," Hakkai smiled good-naturedly.
"Just as long as she doesn't try to molest Sanzo while we're gone."
Goku looked up, eyes wide. "You don't think she would, do you ?"
Either the boy missed the kappa's smirk, or was too horrified to warn himself of it. "Can't say. Anything's possible."
"I'm gonna go check!" Goku said, running back the way they had come.
Hakkai shook his head in admonition. "That was horrible."
"But it worked," Gojyo grabbed Hakkai's arm and wrapped it around his own.
The brunette laughed. "What am I going to do with you?"
Gojyo kissed him on the cheek, grinning uncontrollably. "Whatever you want, 'Kai."
---
The pair looked around for awhile. Finding nothing of interest, they headed back to the inn. They found Goku and Pai playing in the entry room.
"Hey guys," Goku waved them over, "Pai's teaching me magic tricks!"
"Maybe she'll teach you how to make a monkey disappear," Gojyo leaned down to Goku's eye level, hands on his hips.
"I'm not a monkey!" he shot back. He grabbed one of Gojyo's arms and hit something on his wrist.
"Hey!" the redhead pulled his arm back, inspecting it. One section of a pair of handcuffs was stuck on it, the other half dangling.
"Goku wait--!" Pai moved to stop the boy.
Goku pulled on the other half, then snapped it on Hakkai's wrist. "There! Now Hakkai can make sure you don't bother anyone!"
"Very funny, bakasaru," Gojyo glared sarcastically. "Now get us the hell outta these things."
"Um, see..." Pai laughed sheepishly. "I kinda don't have the key for those."
"These need a key?" Goku blinked. "Oops, my bad." He took a few steps back.
"I'm gonna 'my bad' you, you little-" he moved to catch the boy but was stopped short when Hakkai didn't move.
Goku, feeling confident in his safety, laughed. "You can't catch me!"
"Oh dear," Hakkai turned to the girl, "Is there any way to remove these without the key?"
Pai looked worriedly at the two. "I don't think so. You could saw 'em off, I guess."
"I don't suppose you've got a spare saw lying around?" Gojyo batted ineffectively at Goku, who sidestepped him.
"What the hell is all the noise about?" Sanzo leaned on the hallway doorframe.
"I'm afraid Goku botched a magic trick," Hakkai sighed, holding up his arm, taking Gojyo's along with it, "We seem to be stuck."
"Always something, isn't it?" the blond walked over, grabbing Hakkai's arm and inspecting it. The force pulled Gojyo forward, amost falling over, had Hakkai not steadied his shoulder with his free hand.
"Sorry," Goku slumped his shoulders.
"I'm sure I can get the hardware store guy to help," Pai put a comforting hand on Goku's shoulder, "But he's out until dinner."
"So make sure you get ahold of him," Sanzo said, "We're leaving tomorrow."
"Right," Pai looked somewhat annoyed at being ordered around, but decided not to coment.
"So what do we do until dinner?" Gojyo tried to cross his arms before remembering, and Hakkai was pulled in front of him.
Sanzo shrugged, heading to the door. "Suck it up, sunshine. I'm going out for cigarettes."
"I'll come too!" Goku ran past the others to his guardian's side.
"Hey, I'm not done with you monkey!" Gojyo lunged at the boy. Hakkai stood still, holding the kappa's process with a sigh.
---
"You're going to have to help me here," Hakkai tapped Gojyo's shoulder with his free hand.
"Oh, sorry," the redhead held out a hand, in which Hakkai put the deck of cards to hold while he shuffled them.
"Anything in particular you'd like to play?" he asked, "We've got a few hours to kill."
"Not really," he frowned, "I'm getting sick of this."
Hakkai blinked. "You don't want to play?"
Gojyo tapped his friend's forehead. "Not cards, you baka, I mean this," he held up the cuffed arm.
"Well, I'll admit it is a bit of a cramp in the style, but there's nothing we can do about it until dinner," he smiled, "Besides, it's nice to know you won't be flirting with any women tonight."
He leaned closer. "Jealous?"
The green-eyed youkai was taken aback. "I-I didn't say that..."
Gojyo smirked. "Well, if I can't get any chicks tonight, I might have to take advantage of -this- situation."
Hakkai laughed nervously. "I honestly can't tell if you're joking or being serious."
Gojyo stood, still wearing his grin. He walked a bit towards the bed and turned around. Hakkai, having been pulled up by the chain, stared at him. The kappa yanked his arm back suddenly, pulling the surprised brunette to him. Before Hakkai had a chance to regain his composure, Gojyo grabbed his shoulders and spun them both, pushing the shorter youkai onto the bed and kissing him.
Hakkai, after his initial shock, responded, entwining his fingers with Gojyo's connected by the metal bond, while his other arm was braced on Gojyo's shoulder. Gojyo broke away, looking at Hakkai for a moment, before burying his face in the brunette's neck. His hand strayed to his friend's waist, untucking his shirt and running his hand over the heated skin.
Hakkai gasped, insitictively moving to sit up. Gojyo met him halfway there, kissing him again. He pushed him back down gently, before letting his hand wander again. Every time his fingers touched the sensitive skin of his scar, Hakkai shuddered, and Gojyo smiled into his mouth.
From downstairs, a large crash sounded. followed by Pai's angry yells.
Hakkai broke away. "What was that?"
Gojyo shrugged, laying his hand flat on Hakkai's stomach. "Who cares?"
The brunette tried unsuccessfully to supress the shiver that travelled down his spine. He grabbed the half-breed's wrist with his free hand. "It sounded like trouble."
Gojyo sighed. "Ah dammit. It better be a fuckin' -army- for interrupting something this good," he stood up, pulling Hakkai up as well.
Downstairs, Pai glared defiantly at the group of youkai before her. She held a baseball bat up in her defense. "Get the hell outta here, you here me?!"
"We know the Sanzo-ikkou is here," one of the youkai snapped, "Be a good girl and tell us where. We might let you live if you do."
"Screw off!" she screamed, swinging the bat into the speaking youkai's chest. It broke into splintering pieces, leaving her holding a handle. She looked at it with wide eyes, before wincing. "Ah shit!"
The leader advanced, as Pai backed up. Then a flash of green light darted past her and into the youkai, decinigrating him. Pai whirled around as Hakkai and Gojyo ran down the stairs, blocking the remaining youkai from getting to the girl.
"Are you alright Pai-san?" Hakkai asked, charging another ki blast.
"I'm fine," she replied, clenching her fists with excitement, "This is gonna be so cool!"
Gojyo laughed, readying his shakujou. "I'm assuming she's rooting for us?"
"I'd hope so," Hakkai fired the blast into the crowd, "Not quite your army, I'm afraid."
The redhead stepped closer, allowing Hakkai to use both hands for his ki. "It'll have to do, I guess."
The youkai uneffected by the blast advanced. Gojyo swung the shakujou with his free hand, the blade zipping out to dispose of the two nearest enemies. The crowd was thinning; with a full-force ki blast and a few more swings, only a handful remained.
One of them swung his sword between the two of them, trying to hit Pai. Simultaniously, Gojyo and Hakkai shot their arms up, catching the blade with the handcuff chain. Hakkai knocked the youkai's legs out from under him, and Gojyo had the shakujou blade to him before he hit the floor.
Two were left. A flash of green and grey took care of them at the same time, leaving the three in an eerily quiet room.
"Awesome!" Pai squealed, breaking the silence.
"It was the least we could do," Hakkai smiled, turning to the girl, "They were after us, after all."
"But if you'll excuse us," Gojyo grinned winningly at Pai, starting up the stairs with a reluctant brunette in tow, "We left a very important...card game...upstairs. See ya Pai-san!"
She waved them upstairs, and then set to cleaning up the front desk.
---
"Well," Gojyo sighed as Hakkai closed the door behind them, "Should we return to our 'card game'?" He smirked.
Hakkai smiled despite himself. "Can we take a break first? I think I used a little more energy than neccessary."
Gojyo shrugged. "No problem," He flopped down on the bed, pulling Hakkai with him. The brunette laid his head on Gojyo, between his neck and shoulder. The bound arm he rested over the kappa's waist, allowing his arm to lay at his side. Gojyo wrapped his other arm around his friend.
"Thanks," the green-eyed youkai's voice was muffled slightly, speaking into the fabric of Gojyo's shirt.
The redhead nodded, running his fingers through soft brown hair. After a few minutes of silence, he spoke. "Hey, 'Kai..."
He got no answer. He moved his head down slightly to look at Hakkai, who had fallen asleep. He smiled contently, kissing the top of Hakkai's head and setting in for a nap himself.
---
When Hakkai awoke, early morning sunlight was streaming through the window. Guessing they must've slept on all night, he stood, careful not to wake Gojyo. He stretched, looking around.
He stopped short, wondering how he could do this. His arm was free; the handcuffs were gone. He decided to go downstairs and ask Pai about it.
She was leaning on the counter, barely awake. When she saw Hakkai, she stifled a yawn and waved him over. "Good morning!"
Hakkai nodded, smiling. "I'm sorry we missed dinner last night. I'm afraid we fell asleep."
"It's no problem," she dismissed it with a hand, "I'll get you guys something to eat. I'll bet you're hungry." She started toward the kitchen.
"Thank you," he followed, rubbing the back of his head, "Um, Pai-san, did you get rid of the handcuffs?"
"Oh yeah!" she snapped her fingers, remembering, as she opened the cabinet, "I had the guy make a key from another pair we had. Then I took 'em off while you guys were asleep."
Hakkai's face flushed. "You didn't have to. You should've just woken us."
She smiled, handing him some lefover boxes. "You guys just looked so cute, I couldn't bear to wake you up," she laughed a little, looking at his face, "You're blushing! Don't worry, I won't say anything. Enjoy your breakfast. From what I heard last night, Sanzo-san is ready to leave in a hurry."
He took the boxes, speechless. Finally he nodded, turning to go upstairs. "Thank you."
---
Hakkai set the boxes on the table back in the room. Gojyo was still sleeping, so he sat on the edge of the bed. The brunette stared at his friend for a few minutes, before leaning over to kiss him softly. Gojyo's eyes immediately opened, wrapping an arm around Hakkai's neck to bring him closer, deepening the kiss.
When they broke apart, the kappa smiled. "There's a wake-up call I could get used to. I take it the cuffs came off easily enough..."
He nodded. "Pai gave us some breakfast. We'd better eat before Sanzo gets up. I don't even think Goku's going to get breakfast this morning."
Gojyo sat up with a long stretch. Hakkai handed him one of the boxes, sitting across from him.
"Food too?" he grinned, opening the box, "I hink I'll have to keep you, 'Kai-chan."
Hakkai blinked. "...Chan?"
---
End. Whoo. [grins] This makes up for the past two short chappehs, I guess. Anyway, here's the new question. I'm thinking of making plushies. Would anyone buy them? If I get somewhat of a positive response, I'll set up a webpage with the details. I'll start with the ikkou, tho I'd take others into consideration. They's beh about 8-10" at $10 each. Prolly a group deal too or something. Whatcha think?
KarotsaMused: BLAM!
Ranma Higurashi: Ta-dah! [grins]
Zelgadis55: And Hakkai's compatable with EVERYONE! Heh. Oddly enough, I'm the least like Sanzo. That's why I have so much trouble writing for him I guess.
Azura: Yep, Homura's sheduled to make an appearance soon...once I'm a bit more confident I can write for him...
Joonie: Well, glad you finally got time. I'm a review whore for sure. Is that a good 'Gah' or an overwhelmed 'way-too-much' gah?
Crimson1: He just thoght it wasn't appropriate I guess. That and this -is- Hakkai we're talking about here. [grins] I like making him super-conservative.
Tree Girl: Thankehs. Like Saiyuki itself, ne? I love writing combo-genre ficcehs. They're much more fun. [smiles]
KawaiiLilMarron: Did you owe meh one? I guess I'll take it in advance for this latest chappeh. Heheheh... [blinks] All-mighty Paisley...? Riiiiiiight...
Until next time minna-san!