Lana
The week went by as slowly as Harry could have ever imagined; he spent as much time with Severus as possible, trying desperately to learn about the man who was his father. He listened intently as Severus went one about how he was in his Hogwarts years, how he was with Lily, how he felt towards James and his friends, anything and everything Harry dared to ask. Finally, the day before the one-week mark, he asked his father what he felt like when he was with her. Unable to answer the question with mere words in fear of diminishing their love, he sighed.
"I can show you, but I must warn you – " Severus shook his head, "You'll see a side of your mother that will make you turn red, and you'll see a side of me you wouldn't believe possible."
Harry didn't care, "Show me. I want to know…"
Severus nodded, then walked over to Harry and touched his shoulder gently. "Just as the Memory Potion did, you will experience a flash of events – however, these aren't your memories, they're mine."
Harry nodded, "Please, show me."
Severus closed his eyes and brought back all of his memories of her, everything from before their relationship to conceiving Harry to her dying – everything. With a flash of energy, he felt his thoughts and feelings being transferred over to Harry. With a jolt, he grasped his shoulder hard enough to leave marks.
He felt himself loathing her… however, the feeling quickly changed to fondness and then to love. He saw them kiss; he felt them connect in a way he had never experienced. He saw them together, in her bed, the night their daughter was conceived. He felt the happiness, the ecstasy, the love his father felt for Lily. He felt the explosion of passion they had felt, nearly twenty years before.
The scene before him switched to the day Severus found out Lily was pregnant; a mixture of joy and confusion washed through his body, but eventually the confusion succumbed to the joy and happiness Severus felt for his daughter. The scene once again changed to days before the Christmas season, when Severus was panicking because he couldn't find her; the relief he felt when Professor McGonagall told him she was alive, the sudden grief and sadness he felt when Dumbledore told him she had lost the baby.
Once again, a different scene flashed before his eyes; this time it was of the two standing in Dumbledore's office, side by side, the moment they were married. The scene flashed to that night; their wedding night. Severus was right; he could feel his ears turn bright red as he saw what the two were doing in full detail.
The scene shifted once more to the night before they broke up; January 24th. Sadness and regret filled him to the core as he saw the two dance, both crying. He had never seen Severus cry; it was all new to him. He felt his sadness turn to anger as he felt Severus punch Lucius Malfoy for saying something unwanted. Hatred began to surge through Harry as he saw James and Lily together at the Gryffindor table, and once again, her in a white dress and him in a black tux. A new sound filled his ears; his mother pleading with Severus to take her away, to object to her marrying James. A new kind of grief filled Harry, as he felt empty, drained.
His emotions soon changed as he witnessed his parents' last times being together, in a small hotel room. He knew it was the night he was conceived… he didn't know how, he just knew. The emotion intensified as he saw his mother lying on a bed in a white room, screaming with pain with Dumbledore on one side, Severus and Remus Lupin on her other. He witnessed his own birth, his mother crying on the bed and screaming obscenities at Severus and James, who had arrived moments before he was born.
A year passed before him, and he saw his mother standing in the window. Instead of his eyes, he was looking through Severus' now. He saw his mother curse him, and then he shuddered as he witnessed two jets of green light, one lasting much longer than it should have. He felt extreme depression fill him as Severus hit the wall of the Potter's cottage, watching as the building crumbled to the ground. He felt near insanity setting in as he felt Severus pick a baby – Harry – up and set him down, then move on to Lily. He felt the sobs that thundered through Severus' body as he held Lily's bloody and broken body for hours.
He felt the pain Severus had felt as he saw Harry for the first time, looking exactly as James did. He saw Severus read Lily's letter, a new emotion well up inside him; hope, almost. A newfound light, in a way. He saw himself walk into the office and a sense of pride and a flicker of… love, perhaps? It didn't last long, as he was seeing himself as Severus saw him; Lily's child. Then, as the scene changed once again, he saw himself as Severus' son, looking exactly like him. Pride filled him, but the scene changed once more to a room Harry assumed was in the castle. He recognized it as the room Lily and Severus had shared during their seventh year at Hogwarts. He saw Severus lying on the four-poster bed, holding a picture of Lily.
It had happened days ago; Severus had avoided taking his Dreamless Sleep potion, and Harry nearly screamed as the dreams and images that Severus dreamt filled his own mind. The face of Lord Voldemort killing his daughter, killing his wife, and nearly killing his son. The pain mixed in with the years after Lily's death, the hatred he felt for James seeping into his feelings for Harry, as he was a miniature version of James Potter. Once again, he felt a surge of energy run through his body as the visions stopped.
Harry opened his eyes, his body trembling. Looking up into the eyes of Severus, he suddenly felt sorrow for this man past anything he had ever experienced; knowing how Lily and Severus felt for each other was frightening, as he had never seen Severus express emotions of any kind. The pain he felt was still flashing through his mind. Harry shook his head and looked up at Severus one last time.
"I'm sorry…" He mumbled, "I ruined everything, I'm sorry."
Severus shook his head, "This is what I was afraid of. You did not ruin everything; Lord Voldemort would have come after Lily eventually anyway. Do not blame yourself; never blame yourself."
"Why are you telling me this?" Harry asked, "You should listen to yourself for once… You tried to save Mum, and yet you blame yourself just as much as I do now."
"Harry, I showed you because I thought you deserved to know. I knew you wouldn't be able to handle certain aspects, but I also know you had to know."
Harry nodded, "Thank you… But… God, this is so hard." He sighed, "I know all this happened, in the back of my mind, but it's so hard to absorb. A week ago, I wouldn't have cared if you were dead or alive… Now though, you're the only family I have. I suppose if Mum were alive, it'd be different, maybe I wouldn't jump into this whole father-son thing so quickly… But you were the closest thing to her, and she loved you. You helped her create me… It's so hard to take in, but I do know it happened."
"Harry, are you sure you want the world to know this soon?" Severus asked, "Your whole identity that you've known all your life will be gone. It's only been a week; why so soon?"
"Because I can't stand having the name Potter attached to me while I have no relation to him; he was abusive, he hurt my Mum. I might look like him, but god help me if I ever turn out like him. Having him as a part of me is a disgrace… Besides, the longer it takes, the harder it'll be for the world to accept. We might as well just get it over with now." Harry sighed, "I just want to know where I belong."
"You belong here," Severus answered quietly, "Whether you accept it or not, you are my son and you belong with me. If Lily was still alive, you would have grown up with my name, with my looks; it would be no different than as if James never existed. However, you grew up the way your mother thought best for you. I believe you're old enough to make your own decisions now, and I trust you to do what you think was best; what you believe your mother would have wanted you to do."
Harry took in a deep breath, "I believe she would have wanted me to know you, both as a person and my father. I don't think she intended for me to look like this forever, so now's as good a time as any to switch back to the way I was supposed to be. Like you said, she didn't know I would be Voldemort's downfall; she just wanted me to grow up as safe as possible. I'm not quite an adult, but I'm as safe as I'll ever be. I'll be less of a target, if anything, now that I'm no longer the heir of Gryffindor to Voldemort… no longer a Potter."
Severus nodded, "As long as you want this… I don't want to make you feel you have to do anything."
"You aren't… I want to. I know Mum would have wanted me to, so it might as well start now."
Severus smiled, "You're definitely Lily's son…"
Harry smirked, "You wouldn't believe how many people have told me that."
"It's true."
"…Thanks."