*** I was feeling a little lazy, because I had only written the two final chapters of "Another Minute" since the site decided to break (everything else I had already written and was ready to upload when I found out the site hated people). Then I heard one of my all time favorite songs and you all know what that means...that's right a song-fic. The song I use in this fic is "Night Moves" by Bob Seger (classic rock is the best music on Earth). I haven't decided whether or not to use this story as a lead into another story, because this one will take place in the past. I guess it all depends on feedback. ***
//I was a little too tall
Could've used a few pounds //
I remember when I first came to the WWF. I was no one special to these people. I had made a few waves in other places. But that's how you got to the WWF, you made waves in the WCW and ECW. I wasn't the only one who had held the WCW television championship or the ECW one. I was just more talent.
Vince McMahon seemed to like me. He liked my sense of humor. There were rumors in the locker room that I expected to be a superstar immediately. That I would step over anyone to get to the top. Plenty of people didn't care for me. That was fine with me. Friends make you weak. Getting to know the people you might have to screw over later messes up your priorities.
But I was alone for the first time in my life. I could talk to some of the people I had met over the years. Some of the people who knew the real me and had helped me in the past. But I didn't really have any friends or anyone to share my thoughts with. It was hard.
// Tight pants point hardly reknown
She was a black haired beauty with big dark eyes //
Then I met her. She was involved at the time. She was beautiful. She wasn't like the other women in the Federation. She listened to other people. She tried to help out other people. She didn't feel the need to be on top. She wasn't power hungry.
She would go out of her way to talk to me. I think she knew that I was lonely. She would look me straight in the eyes and ask my opinion. She would tell me naughty jokes, because she knew I would appreciate them. I would tell her what it was like working your way up in three separate federations and what the indie organizations were like.
We came from two different worlds. But we both loved wrestling. She could watch tapes of matches for hours on end. She could ask about techniques until you didn't want to explain the intricacies of a moonsault anymore. I already felt my priorities getting screwed up.
//And points all her own sitting way up high
Way up firm and high //
He was dazzling. You watched him in the ring and you couldn't help but be mesmerized. He was graceful and catlike. I loved the way he knew what his body could take, but he would still push himself to the limits. And he never, ever complained about working. No one loved working more than him. And with the fans he was amazing. He knew why he was where he was. He always let the fans knew that they mattered to him.
But I never expected him to be someone who would sit and listen to me talk for hours on end. I told him about my childhood, about the people I cared about. I even told him all about my relationship with the man I was engaged to. He would listen to me and make me feel important and cared for. He never really offered any advice, but he let me know he was there for me.
I couldn't help but feel attracted to him. Even though I knew he would never make any advances on me while I was engaged to another man. But I wasn't ready to tell him that I would drop everything for him if I didn't know he felt the same.
//Out past the cornfields when the wheat got heavy
Out in the back seat of my '60 Chevy //
"What are we doing?" he asked, his hair flowing as the wind carried it.
"I just wanted to go for a drive with one of my closest friends," I shrugged. "I'm getting married in two days."
"I know," he said. His voice was devoid of emotion.
"Give me a reason not to," I said.
"What?" he asked, turning towards me.
"You know I'm already uncertain about this marriage," she said. "All I need is a good reason not to go through with it."
"You can't make me responsible for you making a decision like that," he said.
"Fine," I said. "I have to get back."
//Workin' on mysteries without any clues
Workin' on our night moves //
I paced my hotel room the next night thinking about her. Of course I was attracted to her. She was beautiful and kind and smart. How could I not like her? But I didn't want to be the reason she made a decision like that. Unless she wanted me.
But she had never indicated that our relationship was anything more than a friendship. She always seemed to make it perfectly clear that she was engaged to a man that she could love forever. I was only her friend. At least, that's what I had thought I was.
It was four AM before I paced down the hotel hallway to her room. Her bacholerette party should have been long over. I finally had the guts to tell her what she meant to me. Tell her that I thought we had potential. That I thought we could be the real deal.
//Trying to make some front page drive-in news
Workin' on our night moves in the summertime
In the sweet summertime //
I was about to knock on the door when I heard a low moan. A moan of pleasure.
"That's right," a gruff voice said. "You know you want me."
I didn't recognize the voice. Maybe Andrew sounded different when he and Stephanie were having sex. I guess any doubts she had been having the night before had passed. I guess Andrew was the man she really wanted.
I turned and walked back to my hotel room. I tried not to feel rejected. I mean, she hadn't actually rejected me. She didn't even know I was going to offer her a way out of her marriage. I was going to offer to rearrange my priorities for her.
I was disappointed, but I figured it just wasn't my time. I would find some woman I could fall in love with some other time. Someone who wasn't in the business probably. I just couldn't imagine another woman at that point in my life.
//We weren't in love oh no far from it
We weren't searching for some high in the sky summit //
He was there for me when I found out I had been abducted by HHH and been married. He let me cry on his shoulder when Andrew wouldn't try to understand the position I was in. He held me close when I felt like the pain would never end.
"I just need to feel alive again," I whispered to him.
"What?" he asked me. He asked softly, trying to make sure he knew what I was talking about.
"I need you," I whispered, as I kissed along his jaw. "I want you."
"You're just confused," he said. His voiced sounded strained.
"Just tell me if you don't want me," I said, pulling away.
"That is not the problem," he said.
//We were just young and restless and bored
Living by the sword //
I had thought I had been kissed before. I thought that I knew what passion was before. I had no idea how much fire could exist between two people. He made me feel alive and then some. He made me feel like I was a firework that was finally being lit.
I never imagined that my best friend would be able to make me feel so wonderful. I never thought I would want him so badly. I never thought I would have a chance at something like that with him. I thought we could go beyond an affair. We could have that once in a lifetime romance.
He was the first person who I felt an emotional connection and a physical connection to. He was the one person I thought I would be able to run to for the rest of my life. I felt like our relationship could grow beyond anything I had ever known.
But then someone came to me with an attractive offer.
//And we'd steal away every chance we could
To the backroom, the alley, the trusty woods //
I was with her all the time. I could look at her and feel all the passion I had for her. She made my insides churn and feel unsteady. She touched my hand and I knew that I would never want another woman the way I wanted her.
Those were the best three weeks of my life. I was spending all of my time with the woman of my dreams. I won't say I was in love with her. It all happened so quickly. All I knew was that I had to be with her. When I was away from her I feel normal, ordinary. But around her I felt like something special.
I knew she felt the same. There was room for love in our relationship. We were laying the groundwork for something meaningful. We had all the time in the world to be with each other. In my mind there was no doubt that I would fall in love with her. It was starting. But there was a way to go.
//I used her she used me
But neither one cared
We were getting our share //
We both knew what loneliness was. We both knew what it felt like to have no one who understood what you were going through. But we both held back.
I never told her that I wanted to think about marriage and settling down and kids. I didn't tell her that I could imagine a life with her. I purposely didn't let her that close. I never told her how she made me feel. I let her think that our relationship was purely physical and I would be able to walk away when we didn't need each other anymore.
She never told me how much she hated her father. Not that I blamed her for hating him. It would have helped me out a lot if she had let me in on that tidbit before Armageddon. Maybe I wouldn't have felt so bitter. Maybe I would be able to look back on our relationship without any regrets.
//Workin' on our night moves
Trying to lose those awkward teenage blues //
I tried to explain that it was just business. I didn't care about HHH. I would never care about HHH. Even now the relationship I have with Hunter is purely platonic. He's been a great friend. But no one outside of the relationship could understand it.
I was disappointed that Chris couldn't understand how deeply Vince had hurt me. I don't think I'll ever trust my father again. I love him yes, but I dread the thought of becoming like him. I see it happening everyday though. A little more McMahon seems to come out in me all the time.
Chris didn't know how I could stay married to someone I didn't care about. When I told him it was for revenge he was even more disgusted. He said I was making a mockery of marriage and that I didn't deserve to have a happy marriage with someone I loved. Maybe he was right. Maybe I will never be married to someone I love.
//Workin' on our night moves
And it was summertime
An oh the wonder //
Then he started calling me names. At first I knew he was hurt. I was married to someone he despised and I was married for all the wrong reasons. But being called a slut hurt too. I was hoping he would stop. I was hoping once the pain wore off that he would realize that I still cared for him.
That didn't happen. The names got worse. The pain grew deeper. Hunter didn't know how much I cared for Jericho. He didn't know why Jericho would feel justified when he called me names. He got angry. He would punish Jericho. At first it made me glad to get some measure of revenge. But then I felt guilty when I saw him lying in the middle of the ring in pain. All because of me.
Then I felt some hope. He kissed me. Sure it was a hard, unyielding kiss. But it was so right to touch him again. I tried to feel angry. But I just wanted him to profess that he cared about me. That he wanted me back. That he would forgive what was in the past. My revenge was past. I could end my sham of a marriage. All he had to do was ask.
// Felt the lightning
And we waited on the Thunder
Waited on the thunder //
I felt like a stupid fool. I never should have kissed her. It hurt me that she still mattered to me after all of that time. I hated that I couldn't get her out of my system. I guess I was telling her that I didn't care what she did to me because nothing her husband could do to me would ever hurt me as much as she had already hurt me.
I didn't expect for that one kiss to blow up like it did. It did wonders for my career. Not too much for my heart though. The biggest wonder of it all was that I never hated her. During the whole ordeal leading up to Fully Loaded, I never felt animosity toward Stephanie.
That's when I fell in love with Stephanie. I saw that it hurt her to hurt me. But she thought I hated her. She thought I never really cared for her. I could see the pain in her eyes. I could've reached out to her. But I couldn't tell her that I loved her. Our time had passed. She belonged somewhere other than where I was. I thought the last man standing match was a good place to end my relationship with Stephanie, at least in my mind.
//I woke last night to the sound of thunder
How far off I sat and wonder //
And now, here I am being a thorn in her side again. I don't hate her. I'm trying to get her attention. I'm trying to remind her of what we had. Because while she was gone for a couple of months, I missed her. I missed my chance to tease her. I realized that for a year and a half she had been a part of my life one way or another. And she would never completely leave me.
It's strange to fall in love with someone after the relationship is already over. But I always knew I would fall in love with Stephanie McMahon. What's in the past is in the past. I don't want to rehash our relationship. I don't want her back. I just want to remind her. I just want to know she remembers it all.
//Started humming a song from 1962
Ain't it funny how the night moves? //
I like it when he teases me now. Insults would be more accurate. But it keeps him in my life. He was the one that got away. The one you always wonder about. The one that might have been "the one".
I know he needs this too. The little time I was with him I remember him wanting to remember everything. He wants to know where he's been. He wants to live as much as he can. He doesn't live in the past, but he knows that the past has brought him where he was.
Maybe things could have been different. Maybe if I had told him that I loved him. If I had made him more important than stupid revenge. But you have to live with regret. I'm just glad I got the chance to regret anything having to do with Chris.
Maybe I'm not with my soulmate, but at least I met him. At least I know it was me who let him get away and I don't have to spend the rest of my life wondering who he is. At least I had him for some measure of time.
// When you just don't seem to have as much to lose
Strange how the night moves
With autumn closing in.//
*** What do you think? Please review and let me know what you think. ***
//I was a little too tall
Could've used a few pounds //
I remember when I first came to the WWF. I was no one special to these people. I had made a few waves in other places. But that's how you got to the WWF, you made waves in the WCW and ECW. I wasn't the only one who had held the WCW television championship or the ECW one. I was just more talent.
Vince McMahon seemed to like me. He liked my sense of humor. There were rumors in the locker room that I expected to be a superstar immediately. That I would step over anyone to get to the top. Plenty of people didn't care for me. That was fine with me. Friends make you weak. Getting to know the people you might have to screw over later messes up your priorities.
But I was alone for the first time in my life. I could talk to some of the people I had met over the years. Some of the people who knew the real me and had helped me in the past. But I didn't really have any friends or anyone to share my thoughts with. It was hard.
// Tight pants point hardly reknown
She was a black haired beauty with big dark eyes //
Then I met her. She was involved at the time. She was beautiful. She wasn't like the other women in the Federation. She listened to other people. She tried to help out other people. She didn't feel the need to be on top. She wasn't power hungry.
She would go out of her way to talk to me. I think she knew that I was lonely. She would look me straight in the eyes and ask my opinion. She would tell me naughty jokes, because she knew I would appreciate them. I would tell her what it was like working your way up in three separate federations and what the indie organizations were like.
We came from two different worlds. But we both loved wrestling. She could watch tapes of matches for hours on end. She could ask about techniques until you didn't want to explain the intricacies of a moonsault anymore. I already felt my priorities getting screwed up.
//And points all her own sitting way up high
Way up firm and high //
He was dazzling. You watched him in the ring and you couldn't help but be mesmerized. He was graceful and catlike. I loved the way he knew what his body could take, but he would still push himself to the limits. And he never, ever complained about working. No one loved working more than him. And with the fans he was amazing. He knew why he was where he was. He always let the fans knew that they mattered to him.
But I never expected him to be someone who would sit and listen to me talk for hours on end. I told him about my childhood, about the people I cared about. I even told him all about my relationship with the man I was engaged to. He would listen to me and make me feel important and cared for. He never really offered any advice, but he let me know he was there for me.
I couldn't help but feel attracted to him. Even though I knew he would never make any advances on me while I was engaged to another man. But I wasn't ready to tell him that I would drop everything for him if I didn't know he felt the same.
//Out past the cornfields when the wheat got heavy
Out in the back seat of my '60 Chevy //
"What are we doing?" he asked, his hair flowing as the wind carried it.
"I just wanted to go for a drive with one of my closest friends," I shrugged. "I'm getting married in two days."
"I know," he said. His voice was devoid of emotion.
"Give me a reason not to," I said.
"What?" he asked, turning towards me.
"You know I'm already uncertain about this marriage," she said. "All I need is a good reason not to go through with it."
"You can't make me responsible for you making a decision like that," he said.
"Fine," I said. "I have to get back."
//Workin' on mysteries without any clues
Workin' on our night moves //
I paced my hotel room the next night thinking about her. Of course I was attracted to her. She was beautiful and kind and smart. How could I not like her? But I didn't want to be the reason she made a decision like that. Unless she wanted me.
But she had never indicated that our relationship was anything more than a friendship. She always seemed to make it perfectly clear that she was engaged to a man that she could love forever. I was only her friend. At least, that's what I had thought I was.
It was four AM before I paced down the hotel hallway to her room. Her bacholerette party should have been long over. I finally had the guts to tell her what she meant to me. Tell her that I thought we had potential. That I thought we could be the real deal.
//Trying to make some front page drive-in news
Workin' on our night moves in the summertime
In the sweet summertime //
I was about to knock on the door when I heard a low moan. A moan of pleasure.
"That's right," a gruff voice said. "You know you want me."
I didn't recognize the voice. Maybe Andrew sounded different when he and Stephanie were having sex. I guess any doubts she had been having the night before had passed. I guess Andrew was the man she really wanted.
I turned and walked back to my hotel room. I tried not to feel rejected. I mean, she hadn't actually rejected me. She didn't even know I was going to offer her a way out of her marriage. I was going to offer to rearrange my priorities for her.
I was disappointed, but I figured it just wasn't my time. I would find some woman I could fall in love with some other time. Someone who wasn't in the business probably. I just couldn't imagine another woman at that point in my life.
//We weren't in love oh no far from it
We weren't searching for some high in the sky summit //
He was there for me when I found out I had been abducted by HHH and been married. He let me cry on his shoulder when Andrew wouldn't try to understand the position I was in. He held me close when I felt like the pain would never end.
"I just need to feel alive again," I whispered to him.
"What?" he asked me. He asked softly, trying to make sure he knew what I was talking about.
"I need you," I whispered, as I kissed along his jaw. "I want you."
"You're just confused," he said. His voiced sounded strained.
"Just tell me if you don't want me," I said, pulling away.
"That is not the problem," he said.
//We were just young and restless and bored
Living by the sword //
I had thought I had been kissed before. I thought that I knew what passion was before. I had no idea how much fire could exist between two people. He made me feel alive and then some. He made me feel like I was a firework that was finally being lit.
I never imagined that my best friend would be able to make me feel so wonderful. I never thought I would want him so badly. I never thought I would have a chance at something like that with him. I thought we could go beyond an affair. We could have that once in a lifetime romance.
He was the first person who I felt an emotional connection and a physical connection to. He was the one person I thought I would be able to run to for the rest of my life. I felt like our relationship could grow beyond anything I had ever known.
But then someone came to me with an attractive offer.
//And we'd steal away every chance we could
To the backroom, the alley, the trusty woods //
I was with her all the time. I could look at her and feel all the passion I had for her. She made my insides churn and feel unsteady. She touched my hand and I knew that I would never want another woman the way I wanted her.
Those were the best three weeks of my life. I was spending all of my time with the woman of my dreams. I won't say I was in love with her. It all happened so quickly. All I knew was that I had to be with her. When I was away from her I feel normal, ordinary. But around her I felt like something special.
I knew she felt the same. There was room for love in our relationship. We were laying the groundwork for something meaningful. We had all the time in the world to be with each other. In my mind there was no doubt that I would fall in love with her. It was starting. But there was a way to go.
//I used her she used me
But neither one cared
We were getting our share //
We both knew what loneliness was. We both knew what it felt like to have no one who understood what you were going through. But we both held back.
I never told her that I wanted to think about marriage and settling down and kids. I didn't tell her that I could imagine a life with her. I purposely didn't let her that close. I never told her how she made me feel. I let her think that our relationship was purely physical and I would be able to walk away when we didn't need each other anymore.
She never told me how much she hated her father. Not that I blamed her for hating him. It would have helped me out a lot if she had let me in on that tidbit before Armageddon. Maybe I wouldn't have felt so bitter. Maybe I would be able to look back on our relationship without any regrets.
//Workin' on our night moves
Trying to lose those awkward teenage blues //
I tried to explain that it was just business. I didn't care about HHH. I would never care about HHH. Even now the relationship I have with Hunter is purely platonic. He's been a great friend. But no one outside of the relationship could understand it.
I was disappointed that Chris couldn't understand how deeply Vince had hurt me. I don't think I'll ever trust my father again. I love him yes, but I dread the thought of becoming like him. I see it happening everyday though. A little more McMahon seems to come out in me all the time.
Chris didn't know how I could stay married to someone I didn't care about. When I told him it was for revenge he was even more disgusted. He said I was making a mockery of marriage and that I didn't deserve to have a happy marriage with someone I loved. Maybe he was right. Maybe I will never be married to someone I love.
//Workin' on our night moves
And it was summertime
An oh the wonder //
Then he started calling me names. At first I knew he was hurt. I was married to someone he despised and I was married for all the wrong reasons. But being called a slut hurt too. I was hoping he would stop. I was hoping once the pain wore off that he would realize that I still cared for him.
That didn't happen. The names got worse. The pain grew deeper. Hunter didn't know how much I cared for Jericho. He didn't know why Jericho would feel justified when he called me names. He got angry. He would punish Jericho. At first it made me glad to get some measure of revenge. But then I felt guilty when I saw him lying in the middle of the ring in pain. All because of me.
Then I felt some hope. He kissed me. Sure it was a hard, unyielding kiss. But it was so right to touch him again. I tried to feel angry. But I just wanted him to profess that he cared about me. That he wanted me back. That he would forgive what was in the past. My revenge was past. I could end my sham of a marriage. All he had to do was ask.
// Felt the lightning
And we waited on the Thunder
Waited on the thunder //
I felt like a stupid fool. I never should have kissed her. It hurt me that she still mattered to me after all of that time. I hated that I couldn't get her out of my system. I guess I was telling her that I didn't care what she did to me because nothing her husband could do to me would ever hurt me as much as she had already hurt me.
I didn't expect for that one kiss to blow up like it did. It did wonders for my career. Not too much for my heart though. The biggest wonder of it all was that I never hated her. During the whole ordeal leading up to Fully Loaded, I never felt animosity toward Stephanie.
That's when I fell in love with Stephanie. I saw that it hurt her to hurt me. But she thought I hated her. She thought I never really cared for her. I could see the pain in her eyes. I could've reached out to her. But I couldn't tell her that I loved her. Our time had passed. She belonged somewhere other than where I was. I thought the last man standing match was a good place to end my relationship with Stephanie, at least in my mind.
//I woke last night to the sound of thunder
How far off I sat and wonder //
And now, here I am being a thorn in her side again. I don't hate her. I'm trying to get her attention. I'm trying to remind her of what we had. Because while she was gone for a couple of months, I missed her. I missed my chance to tease her. I realized that for a year and a half she had been a part of my life one way or another. And she would never completely leave me.
It's strange to fall in love with someone after the relationship is already over. But I always knew I would fall in love with Stephanie McMahon. What's in the past is in the past. I don't want to rehash our relationship. I don't want her back. I just want to remind her. I just want to know she remembers it all.
//Started humming a song from 1962
Ain't it funny how the night moves? //
I like it when he teases me now. Insults would be more accurate. But it keeps him in my life. He was the one that got away. The one you always wonder about. The one that might have been "the one".
I know he needs this too. The little time I was with him I remember him wanting to remember everything. He wants to know where he's been. He wants to live as much as he can. He doesn't live in the past, but he knows that the past has brought him where he was.
Maybe things could have been different. Maybe if I had told him that I loved him. If I had made him more important than stupid revenge. But you have to live with regret. I'm just glad I got the chance to regret anything having to do with Chris.
Maybe I'm not with my soulmate, but at least I met him. At least I know it was me who let him get away and I don't have to spend the rest of my life wondering who he is. At least I had him for some measure of time.
// When you just don't seem to have as much to lose
Strange how the night moves
With autumn closing in.//
*** What do you think? Please review and let me know what you think. ***