Author: Jibaku-chan
Warnings: Homosexuality. Slight mocking of yaoi haters. Flames will be throughly enjoyed.
Summary:Zim gets his first taste of how prejudiced people can be.
-Dedicated to the brave beautiful chicas on the Dib/ZimLove mailing list and anyone who's been through it. One day there WILL be a place for us.-
Zim lay in his laboratory on a huge red couch, watching the big TV wall listlessly. He could hear GIR running around in the upper levels of the house, giggling eerily. Occasionally he heard a loud crashing noise and winced. The puppy-bot was costing more and more in property damage every day. As long as he wasn't footing the bill, what did he care? GIR was advanced. One had to make sacrifices for superior technology.
He tapped his fingers on the edge of the chair. Today had been a horrible day. Someone had seen him and Dib kissing in the supply closet where they held their secret meetings at lunch and had started a vicious rumor about it. Kids had followed Zim around all day, hissing "faggot" and "gaymo" under their breaths. It had been even worse for Dib-while Zim had pretty much no identity, Dib was already the pariah. If it wasn't for Gaz's staunch defense (and steel toed boots) he wouldn't have had a chance of making it home okay.
Zim was worried about Dib. He didn't understand humans at all. On Irk, there was no breeding like the way humans did it, which he considered quite messy and all around unnecessary. There, they picked mates because they loved them, and not because of a biological imperative. Thusly, on Irk, love between the same gender was tolerated as long as it didn't interfere with ones duties. Earth was different. It was almost as if things that did not lead to breeding were completely taboo. Love itself had very little affect on the relationships he witnessed.
His antennae perked up. Someone was tapping on the wall above him. Only one person knew that entrance, the person whom that entrance was specially made for. "Dib!" He lunged over and hit a button that allowed the wall to slide open a crack.
Dib crawled inside and landed on a cushion. he smiled. "You knew I was coming, Zim?"
Zim shrugged. "I was hoping you would. I felt I should be prepared." He studied his boyfriend for a second. Dib's eyes were rimmed bright red, and his nose had a violet tinge to it. It looked as if he'd been crying for some time. "Dib, what is it?"
Dib shook his head. "Nothing, nothing at all. Is the Scary Monkey Show on?"
Zim glowered at Dib. "Diiiiiiib..."
"I...all right." He patted the cushion beside him. "Sit next to me, okay?"
Zim flomped down next to him. He lay in Dib's lap, grinning a little. "You submit to me, earthen stinkbeast, not the other way around."
Dib laughed. "Not before you do, alien. Anyway...you remember what happened today at school, with that closet and the rumor and-"
"Yeah." Zim made an involuntary clicking noise in the back of his throat. Dib had learned this was an Irken sign of apprehension. He sighed. Zim had never faced something like this before. He knew attitudes were different on earth...how was he going to explain this?
"Well..." Dib took a deep breath. "Someone from the school called my house. They told my dad the whole story, and how he needed to not allow me to do such things on school property, and...well...he was very angry."
Zim sat up and put his arm around Dib, squeezing tight. "Does he know about us now?"
Dib nodded. "It was really hard, but I told him everything. He kind of went insane, yelling things about how a respected scientist like him didn't need a-" He spit out the words "queer son."
Zim stared at the floor. He never had parents, but he knew Dib was particularly attached to his father after the loss of his mother. The neglectful way he treated Dib made his stomach turn, normally-and now this. He laced both his arms around Dib and held him tight. Dib sank into the embrace with a sigh. "I'm sorry. I do not understand earth attitudes about...what's the word they use, the polite one?"
"Homosexuality."
"Yes, that...why are there so many people so adamantly opposed to two people in love?"
"Well..." Dib sank deeper into his lovers arms, seemingly even more depressed b the subject at hand. "A lot of people think its sick. That its a sexual thing, that we don't really love eachother. Or they're raised to think its wrong. Some people even say that God hates it-"
Zim pulled back in shock. He held Dib at arms length. "That's ridiculous! Theese humans say that their God is love, and yet they say that their God hates it in certain forms?"
The look on his face was pure misery. "I didn't say it made any sense." He fingered his necklace, the skull pendant Gaz usually wore. She had given it to him to wear today...she never really said why, except that it made her feel better. Gaz was kind of a weird girl, but a sweet one, and Dib found the tiny shrunken thing comforting as well. "I..I don't know what to tell you. As long as we're together, things will always be like this. We'll be yelled at and made fun of in public, people will curse us, it might let up but it will never go away. That's the way these people are."
Zim snorted and loosened his grip, still holding Dib lightly. "Well. They certainly don't make a good argument for a species like mine to NOT destroy them."
Dib shrugged. "Some of them can be good. Its just easy to forget when things like this happen."
Zim grumbled, pulling Dib close to him again. "You're the only good one I know."
Dib held him tightly, burning his face in Zim's chest. His shoulders shuddered a little. Zim was dismayed to feel tears dampening his shirt. He lay back, pulling Dib with him. They stayed like that, Dib shuddering and silently crying on Zim's chest, for a long while. Finally, Dib raised his head and took off his glasses with a rueful smile. "All fogged up..."
Zim wordlessly took them from his hand and wiped them on a corner of his shirt. He handed them back. Dib pushed them up his nose, biting his lip. "I'm sorry about all this...if you don't want to deal with it, I understand-"
Zim shook his head vehemently. "You underestimate me, Dib. I would never give you up, no matter what anyone had to say, and I hope you feel the same about me."
Dib smiled in a heartbreakingly relived way. "I do, I just wonder if you know what we're getting into-"
"Doesn't matter." Zim stroked Dib's hair. He murmured happily. "Someday there'll be a place for us."
Dib laughed a little. "Sounds like a lyric from a song Gaz likes..."
"What song is that?"
He rolled over, looking up at the ceiling. "I don't think you've heard it...its by a singer named PJ Harvey. Gaz is really into her stuff."
"Would you sing it for me?"
"I..." Dib laughed nervously. "I have a lousy singing voice."
"Dib, do not make me beg. You know I hate that."
Dib sighed. "Fine, fine...its called A Place Called Home. Ill sing what I can remember of it." He cleared his throat. "Here we go- One day I know, We'll find a place of hope-Just hold on to me, Just hold on to me..."
Zim reached his hand around and grasped Dib, entertwining their fingers. Dib's shaky voice got a little stronger. "Walk tight, One line,You're wanted, This time...There's no-one to blame, Just hold on to me..."
The lines spurred his memory. He remembered a year or two ago...noone wanted him around. He was a pain-in-the-ass pipsqueak. Most people ignored him, the ones that didn't insulted him. Kind of like Irk, but more alone then usual because he wasn't among his own species.
And then that boy Dib had started chasing him...
"And I'm right on time, And the birds keep singing-And you're right on line, And the bells keep ringing-And the battle is won, And the planes keep winging-One day there'll be a place for us." Dib paused. "I think I'm messing it up."
"That's fine." Zim squeezed his hand. Dib had been so cute even then, with his hair in that odd spike and that trenchcoat swinging behind him during his yelling jags. They danced around eachother, fighting and insulting, for 2 long years. He almost laughed at the memory, how idiotic their fears seemed now. "Keep singing, I want to hear the rest."
Dib took a deep gulp of air. "I walk, I wait, With folded hands, And lonely-I stumble,I stumble-With you,I wait, To be born, Again-With love comes the day, Just hold on to me..." Well, that fit perfecty-how long had it been until they's realized their feelings? Zim had realized them early. He was in denial for a long time, true enough-he was aware of his sexual orientation, but didn't want to believe he was attracted to his self-proclaimed archnemesis. Finally, his loneliness and frustration had won out over restraint and he had grabbed Dib by the shoulders and kissed him roughly. The kiss was at first purely experimental-he had wanted to see if Dib felt the way he did. Then Dib parted his lips and Zim found out that he did, and he was more then happy to express it at last. He smiled widely at the memory.
"Now is, The time, To follow through, To read the sign-Now the Message is sent, Let's bring it to its final end..." Dib paused. "I cant remember the rest, I'm just going to skip to the end..." His voice raised in an impression of a soprano. It was both absurd and adorable. "One day there'll be a place for us...One day, I know, there'll be, a place for us...One day there'll be a place for us." He placed his other hand over Zim's, rubbing the knuckles lightly. "That's all. Gaz has pretty good taste in music."
"Yes, she does." They laid in silence for a few moments. "Dib?"
"Yes, Zim?"
"Is it not a common practice for earth couples to choose a song and designate it as theirs?"
"Yeah."
"Well, I choose that one."
Dib laughed. "Allright. Why?"'
"Because..." Zim sat up, pulling Dib with him. He locked his arms around Dib and kissed him deeply on the lips, allowing the warmth to comfort them both for a few seconds. Then he broke off with a dreamy smile. "One day there'll be a place for us."