Author's Note: I'm so evil to Ken-san. If you all didn't know me better, you'd almost believe I hate him. If you think the last few parts were hard on him, wait 'till you read this next release. I'm going to sauté him alive. One Sushi a la Battousai coming up! Anyway, just so you don't panic on me, this isn't the last of it yet. I'll post one more after this. The torture will continue.
Well, isn't it just great that FF.net is back on track? That's why I'm celebrating by taking out my sadistic tendencies on the rurouni who's just too kind to hate me for it! (*Kenshin smiles at me, then his eyes begin to glow yellow…*) Anou…
S-Standard disclaimers apply…Kenshin…maa…you'll still get the girl, ne? No need to go Battousai on me… Ken-san, don't look at me like that! Loads of WAFF in this segment! I promise! Oh, you like that, ne?
On with the story…(*whew! For a moment there, I thought I was a goner!*)
Mind of the Woman
Part XVI: The Drama of the Century
The grand theatre was packed with people from all walks of life. Affluently dressed patrons, middle-class finery and even those wearing gi and hakama as ratty as my regular ones. Personally, I think I belong with the riff-raff, but apparently, our tickets didn't say so.
After handing the tickets over to our usher, we were led through the throng to come upon an opulent central hallway with several staircases rising on its sides.
"Oh my…" Kaoru gasped under her breath.
She took the words right out of my mouth. Sano actually did something right. This place was so exclusive that there were very few people in it, and they didn't even take my sakabatou from me!
At that thought, I got a nagging feeling that it wasn't natural, that something ought to go terribly wrong, just for the sake of keeping the balance in the universe…
Oh for heaven's sake!
Nothing will go wrong! Everything has been falling apart all night. What could possibly be worse than riding the Inferno Express that Sano happens to be driving, ruining dinner with my insensitivity, being welcomed by a mouse into his home, losing tickets to what is apparently a very popular play and having the footman trying to hound in on my date? It's a wonder Kaoru hasn't caught on!
The usher led us up a flight of stairs and came upon a balcony with an excellent view of the stage. How in the world was Sano able to afford these tickets? How in the world will I be able to afford it when I pay him?
"Kenshin, we're so close to the stage!" Kaoru whispered to me delightedly as we gingerly made our way to the chairs.
"Yes, we are…" Where she can totally absorb the story and sentiment of the play. Boy, am I in for it now.
Dredging, this is what this is. And in the pit, what would we find? Why, Kyoto of course! Stinking to high heaven because the idiot-rurouni has chosen to ignore it, hoping it would die a quiet death.
Holy crap…my stomach's wrenching again…ooooh…I dropped on my place ungracefully.
Kaoru sat comfortably on the cushioned western seat with armrests, her eyes shining and her smile conveying rapture. "This is going to be great, Kenshin! I've never been to a theatre like this! Oh! And look at these cutie seeing-majigs!" She gushed, delicately picking up the intricately designed two-scoped contraption and placing it over her eyes.
Those seeing-majigs aren't the only cute things around here. I forgot about my stomach and leaned my chin on my propped-up palm, watching her with perhaps the most pathetic longing these parts have ever known. I smiled to myself, just looking at her.
"My, how adorable you are!" Said a lady's voice from Kaoru's other side. "I just love seeing a girl in her first theater experience!" We weren't alone in the balcony, which was just as well, considering I'd pass out if there were no one else to lessen my nervousness.
I pulled my eyes from Kaoru and saw an elder woman, distinguishably dressed in the richest material and decked with tasteful jewelry. The white hair on her graying raven locks only added to her distinction. Even with her kind words, I noted how high she held herself, but in spite of that I felt the sincerity of her words. She called my Kaoru adorable. I like her already.
Kaoru put down the scopes and smiled at the one who had spoken. "Well, it's not really my first time, but I've never been in seats like these before. It's wonderful!"
"Isn't it?" Responded the woman, patting Kaoru's hand. "I'm so glad you're the one here and not…well, it's a gentleman I don't like, and he shall remain nameless. Irritating, I tell you. Every single time he tries to buy out this whole balcony so he would be alone…that's quite unimportant at the moment. I am Masaaki Hime, and this is my attendant, Saburo Ayumi." She gestured to a woman beside her who wasn't as finely dressed but looked just as tasteful in her silken garb. Ayumi-dono smiled brightly.
"Oh, you have a beautiful name, Masaaki-san!" Kaoru complimented.
Masaaki-dono laughed. "There's something to be said about having such a name as mine. Everyone who doesn't know me thinks I'm royalty! And might I know who my affable company is?"
Kaoru blushed. "What terrible manners I have! I am Kamiya Kaoru, and this is my escort, Himura Kenshin."
The ladies looked at me and raised amused eyebrows.
"A comely pair, don't you think, Ayu-chan?" Masaaki-dono said.
"Very," Ayumi-dono agreed with a nod.
Both of us turned red as Kaoru and I glanced at each other shyly. Oh, how these women make me feel like I'm thirteen instead of thirty!
"Umm…Masaaki-san," Kaoru began. "I don't even know what this play is all about. Kenshin has been keeping it secret all night!"
Gut-twisting time! Ho my gawd! Please Masaaki-dono! Don't tell her just yet! I couldn't handle it! Ooooooh! My pasted on smile was transforming into a scary grimace.
Masaaki-dono chuckled. "Has he? Well, I'm sure he has his reasons…"
Out of the frying pan and into the fire…now there's no way Kaoru won't get the hint! We'll be sure to talk about Kyoto now. Actually, it's not really the talking part I'm afraid of, it's the potential for yelling, and those knuckle-combos to my jaw Kaoru can deliver with such perfection. Or worse…her angry silence…I groaned inwardly as my insides did another summersault. Oh, when does the hurting stop?
A man suddenly stepped on stage right in front of the curtains. He looked around him, his gaze demanding for silence.
"Oh hush! It's starting!" Masaaki-dono said, clasping Kaoru's hands in a chummy fashion.
Saved by some stranger in the one situation the Hitokiri Battousai couldn't get out of.
All three women turned to the stage where the play began.
I sighed, trying to steady my thudding heart. This is it. There's no turning back.
Time to face the music, in more ways than one.
I think I paid more attention to Kaoru than I did on the play itself. Unbeknownst to her, I watched her face for any hint of what she was thinking. So far, the traveler in the play has taken up residence in the heroine's home, which, I cannot say enough, is totally reminiscent of some rurouni and a dojo owner I don't even have to name.
Thank the gods the guy in the play is neither a samurai nor made to do the laundry and the cooking. For whatever that pathetic reprieve is worth, it certainly would have been overkill if he were elbow deep in soapsuds. If that were the case, it would be reasonable to suppose that somewhere along the story line, there would be a mooching-gambler best friend and a pick-pocketing brat.
As it is, Kaoru's eyes have already twice misted over. And we haven't even gotten to the "leaving" yet!
The story went on to announcing a war. Naturally, the traveler had to join it, ergo he had to go and fight. I could have sworn the hero said, "Shishio Makoto should be stopped," in his loud, melodramatic voice. The scene played the pre-pack-up-and-go moments to a sob-fest tee, and by the time the intermission came round, Kaoru, Masaaki-dono and Ayumi-dono were wiping their eyes of some stray tears.
Kaoru sniffed and looked at me with moist eyes.
I froze.
"I can't wait to see the next part, Kenshin," she said, giving a small smile. "I've never felt so moved in my life."
Neither have I, I wanted to tell her. If you count gut wrenching as being moved.
Yes, I expect the Juppon Katana to come crashing down on me any minute now. That sounded more appealing than facing the real issue.
"That one did me a lot of good," Masaaki-dono said, smiling through unshed tears. "What do you think, Ayu-chan?"
"A lot of good," Ayumi-dono replied.
Oro! Doesn't that attendant do anything else except agree with her?
"Kenshin," Kaoru began, gently placing a hand on mine.
Not good…well, it is, and yet it isn't!
Kaoru continued. "This play remi--"
Aaaaah! I'm not ready to go into this in front of Masaaki-dono and Ayumi-dono!
"Pardon me," said a man's voice behind all of us.
I held down my sigh of relief as we all turned to look at a perfectly dressed man in superb western clothes. He looked as Japanese as the rest of us if it weren't for his attire. I must say, the top hat tucked primly in the crook of his arm made him look terribly proper.
"There seems to have been a mix-up," the man went on to say, eyeing me with disdain.
Oro?
"Oh," Masaaki-dono said flatly. "It's you."
The man bowed his head towards her in icy civility. "Hime-san, Ayumi-san," he said, acknowledging their presence. "As much as I'd rather have this balcony all to myself, the theater seems to find humor in accommodating you and your assistant every blessed time."
"Well, this time they got it right excluding you all together," Masaaki-dono huffed. "You are invading our nice little circle, Hiro-san. You'd do well not to insist upon it. Bye, bye now."
Hime and Hiro. What an odd couple they make.
"I'm afraid that is not possible, Hime-san," said Hiro with pursed lips, obviously staying his patience. "As you can see, I'm late. I had to watch the first half of the play down there with the rest of the ruffians. Now that I am here, there is no way I will give up my place. They are, after all, prime seats."
Somehow, I'm getting an odd feeling…
Masaaki-dono frowned severely. "Stop acting like a child, Hiro-san. Himura-san and Kamiya-san were rightfully escorted to this balcony by the theatre ushers. You have no right to make them leave just because you want their seats."
An odd, eerie feeling…
Hiro turned red in the face and curled his hand into a fist. "I have every right to make them leave! I purchased these seats two weeks ago!"
Wh…what…?
I groaned, loudly this time. Oh, the pain…the agony…
I could see Kaoru glaring at Hiro already. Being the gem that she is, she will most certainly take my side, which is totally fine, considering that this really is just an honest mishap. Of course, it had to happen to me…
"Hiro-dono," I struggled amidst the spasms in my abdomen. "This unworthy one had no intention of stealing your place and I honestly did buy these seats, hoping to give Kaoru-dono a wonderful time at the theatre…that's all I wanted…"
I could see the eyes of the ladies softening at my appeal.
"This unworthy one knows you bought both seats…" I moaned a bit, my face going into a grimace at my internal suffering. "But since you only need one, perhaps it would be reasonable if you would just take my place…" Uuuuurgh…it hurts…
"K-Kenshin!" Kaoru gasped, shaking her head already.
Masaaki-dono rose to her feet. "Out of the question!" She hissed. "Himura-san stays right where he is! If the theatre made a mistake issuing the same place to two patrons, then Himura-san and Kaoru-san certainly have more right to it than you do. They came early! Prompt! On time!" She enumerated with emphasis.
Hiro's eyes flashed. "How dare you disregard my station? I am the attaché --"
"I don't care what kind of suitcase you are!" Masaaki-dono somewhat yelled.
The argument was already drawing the attention of the audience around us. Another drama was unfolding…oh Kami-sama, this is all Sano's fault…
"Mou!!" Kaoru exclaimed, standing up and facing Hiro, practically nose to nose with him. She was never one to back down from fights. "Hiro-san, there has obviously been a misunderstanding, but it gives you no such right to be rude to someone as polite and gentle as Kenshin!"
Gentle…oh well…
"I don't have to stand for this!" Hiro said hotly, delving one hand into his coat for something as he reached out with his other hand to grab Kaoru by her shoulder. "Ask your gentleman here where he bought his tickets, then we'll see--"
My eyes flashed.
Oh, Battousai, stay down!
Too late.
I pulled out my sword, my instinct to protect Kaoru roaring in my ears.
Slash!
Four pieces of paper fluttered to the floor like dead butterflies…
Paper…my golden eyes stared…
Tickets! They were tickets! Not a weapon but harmless stubs to prove his case!
"God…" I piped, Battousai suddenly skittering under a rock, deserting the rurouni as usual.
Everyone stared at me, the horrific silence pressing down on me like I've never experienced before.
"I'm so very sorry!" I cried, bowing frantically before Hiro. "T-Take my ticket! I didn't mean to ruin yours!" I gave him my stub, hoping against hope that it would be enough to forgive me and my paranoia. The cramps on my stomach grew worse and my vision blurred, just like it did this morning.
In a daze, his fingers clipped around the stub I had given him. With his mouth hanging open, he looked at it, then his face began to register all his former rage.
"You got this from a SCALPER!" He yelled for the whole theater to hear.
Scalper…scalper…the word echoing through out the entire building.
Oh sweet honor…Scalped tickets. That's just like Sano. Rooster-head, you're really going to get it.
But first…
"Oro…" Spin, keel over and die.
Thud.
Part XVII: Intermission
"Kenshin?"
Warm hands. Soft too, pressing gently on my cheeks. Feels nice. I can get used to this.
I gave a sigh with my eyes still closed and I smiled.
"He's waking up!"
I heard voices chatting, mostly high pitched. Womanly voices.
I opened my eyes slowly. I first caught sight of Kaoru's beautiful face observing me with concern. Then the faces of the other women behind her became apparent. Who were they…? What are they…?
"How do you feel, Kenshin?" She asked, keeping her hands on my cheeks.
"Oro…"
Kaoru gave a wide smile then said, "He's going to be alright, girls!"
"Oh good!"
"The poor man…I'm glad we kicked Hiro out!"
"That arrogant…he deserved it! Bullying this dear, sweet boy!"
Are they talking about me? Sweet boy?
"Hime-san did right to use her theatrical muscle to have Hiro escorted out of the premises!"
"Did you hear what Ayumi-san said?" Gushed another. "Himura-san was protecting Kaoru-chan almost rabidly! Then he begged Hiro to take his tickets just so Kaoru-chan wouldn't have to give up her place! Have you ever heard of anything so gallant?"
Kaoru-chan? When did these women become her friends? And…Hiro got kicked out? Whatever for?!?
"Of course Himura-san's gentle heart couldn't fathom the humiliation Hiro was trying to shove on him!"
"Hiro is just terrible! Imagine him trying to get one over this wonderful, wonderful man? Such a thing will never happen as long as I'm alive!"
"Kenshin? How do you feel?" Kaoru asked me tenderly, smoothing some hair from my forehead.
I turned absolutely red in the face. "I-I'm fine…" I gingerly tried to sit up and found a hoard of women assisting me. "Oro! I'm okay. Thank you for your help…"
They all sighed and smiled at me.
What's going on? My face was surely registering perplexity.
I felt Kaoru supporting me by the arm and I turned even redder. "Kaoru-dono, why are all these ladies…?"
"Oh goodness! He calls you 'dono'? How terribly polite!" Somebody exclaimed, sending the others sighing and smiling again.
"You see? You see how polite he is?" Came a new voice. One I recognized to be Masaaki-dono's. She appeared from the stairs of the balcony we were on and waved an emphatic and angry fist. "The nerve of Hiro to accuse him of buying from a scalper!"
"The nerve!" Echoed Ayumi-dono who came up from behind her.
Oro! If they only knew how entirely possible that was!
"And in spite of such horrid allegations, Himura-san was willing to sacrifice his place for our dear, dear Kaoru-chan!" Masaaki-dono continued, as if making a speech to the multitude. "Good will always prevail over evil and justice is might!"
"Justice indeed!" Ayumi-dono seconded.
"Hear! Hear!" Responded the half-dozen or so women of Masaaki-dono's ilk.
"Himura-san has comported himself like a true gentleman," Masaaki-dono said seriously. "And around here, gentlemen are more welcome than boors like Hiro!"
Ayumi shook her head in disapproval. "Hiro is such a boor!" For a moment there, I thought she was going to disagree.
It dawned on me that very second where all of this was coming from. It had to be Masaaki-dono's doing. She had obviously blown this into some grand production. I'm the good guy, Hiro's the bad guy, and of course, the bad guy had to go.
Now I get to stay in the theatre with my scalped tickets while Hiro is out somewhere, with his perfectly legitimate sliced-in-half tickets, probably plotting revenge against Himura Kenshin.
Well, that's a first. Usually it's Battousai who gets all the enemies.
"Himura Kenshin!" Hiro would say, standing on the Kamiya front yard. "You who slighted me in the theatre! Because of you, I have been banned from entering those hallowed halls of cultural bliss! I challenge you to a dyu-wel!" Stress on the "y" and the "w" even if they shouldn't be there. "With my Wrath of a Thousand Ticket Stubs Secret Technique, I will perforate you off the face of thespian society!"
"I have come here to escort you to the best seats in the house, Himura-san, Kaoru-chan," Masaaki-dono said, gesturing for us.
Nods of approval rippled through the group.
Ayumi-dono clapped quietly. "Oh! Only the best for our hero!"
Since when did fainting qualify as heroism?
"Oro! I thought these were the best seats in the house!" I said in wonder.
Kaoru chuckled. "The theatre is terribly sorry for having issued double tickets, Kenshin. They want us to go watch from the special balcony where we're practically right in front of the stage! Isn't it splendid?"
I saved Japan and I didn't get squat. I scalped a seat and now they want to give me imperial treatment?
This is irony at its finest.
We were hustled to the so-called special seats by a bevy of ladies just dying to make us comfortable and cozy. I was beginning to feel guiltier than my usual fare, after all, they thought I was some drama hero when all I really did was suffer another bout of extreme indigestion.
"Now move along, ladies," Masaaki-dono said, clapping her hands to get them going. "The play is about to start and you don't want to miss what happens on that stage."
Ayumi-dono gave a clap of her own. "Mustn't miss!"
I stared at the retreating women in awe.
Kaoru took a deep breath then let it out with a sigh.
I turned to her, still in a daze.
"Are you sure you're alright, Kenshin?" She asked, giving me a worried smile.
Her sapphire eyes were never more soulful, and I realized just how wonderful she was in spite of all the disasters that have occurred.
What am I so surprised about anyway? She's gone through worse because of me, and yet here she is, sitting in a box with me beside her.
There is no room for fear or rejection. Just the two of us.
Come to think of it, this place is pretty private.
"Kaoru-dono, I am fine…I just felt a little dizzy, that's all…" I answered, not taking my gaze away from her face.
No jolting carriages, no mice running up my sleeve, no thoughtless words, just us. I could kiss her and it would be beautiful.
Maybe I could inch just a bit closer…
"Refreshments!"
Oro!
Kaoru pulled away from me, red-faced. I was in no better condition.
"Compliments of the theatre for your very unfortunate encounter with the resident snot!" Said a nicely dressed lad while serving us tall glasses of what I believe is a western alcoholic beverage called wine.
Kaoru giggled. "Resident snot?"
"Well then what do you want me to call Hiro?" He asked, grinning. "He's tried to push his weight around this place long enough. He had it coming."
"Arigato," I said through my grit teeth. Not that I'm being ungrateful or anything, but I wish the theater had decided to give its compliments at least ten minutes later.
"Enjoy the rest of the play!" Said the lad, giving a sweeping bow and leaving our box.
The curtains rose and silence settled upon the audience.
Kaoru turned to look at the stage which was almost just an arms-length away.
The rest of the play unfolded. The moment of truth.
Part XIX: Finale
The hero left, reducing the heroine, and Kaoru into a pile of tears. A situation that would have been odd under a different circumstance, but for someone like me, it was heartbreaking. I could almost feel myself turning my back on Kaoru along the road to Kyoto.
The subtle differences, like the hero professing his love to the maiden before leaving and the way he promised to come back were either lost on Kaoru, or giving her something more to cry about. Because unlike the hero in the play, I didn't have enough gonads to be so honest with her and myself.
Mangling a handkerchief in her fists, Kaoru watched with baited breath, wet trails forming on her cheeks.
I fidgeted. Should I…? "Kaoru-dono?" I whispered.
I almost jumped out of my skin when she grabbed my hand, her eyes pasted to the stage. "If he loves her, why did he have to go at all?"
I stayed quiet, my heart beating like anything. What was in that question?
Duh! You know very well what that question is trying to ask! This isn't the time to be clueless! Face it like a man!
"H-He did it for her after all, for her future…" I said in a voice too soft for anyone but her to hear.
She sniffled. "Those who get left behind…they never see it that way until the one who left returns. Meanwhile, all they know is that the one they love is gone and might never come back. Either by death, or something else more profound…"
I felt like…I was reading her mind again. This was depth beyond my comprehension.
No, I stand corrected. This isn't her mind. This is her heart. Honest and true.
"If he truly loves her," I continued, placing my other hand atop hers. "Nothing but death will keep him from returning."
She fell silent after that. So did I.
What I had said…for me it isn't true, neither is it for her. Twice, death had claimed me. Once in body, once in soul. The first one by Shishio's sword, the other by Rakuninmura. Yet I returned, for her.
There was something else more powerful than death after all.
"Some people…" she began quietly, "…return in spite of that."
Our thoughts are one.
It awes me, that somebody as stained as I and another as pure as her, should meet in thought so precisely that it was almost like a dream.
I gained the knowledge through blood, she gained it through spirit. It doesn't matter how different lessons are taught, what matters is that it is learned. Experience gave me the brutal reality, life showed her the window.
There is no complication. All is simple. People live for a moment in time, so that they could look forward to the future.
For me it's this moment, in this special place in the theatre. A place I couldn't have possibly been in if Sano had not scalped those tickets; if that mouse hadn't been in the carriage; if Sano were a better driver; if Aoshi hadn't pointed out that Sano has enough money to pay for this whole thing; if Sano didn't get a job; if I hadn't known about Kaoru's grave visits; if Tomoe hadn't given me a gift; if Tsubame had not gone to fetch me in Rakuninmura; if I didn't love Kaoru enough to go to Kyoto; if I didn't walk in the streets of Edo just when an angry Kamiya Kasshin shihondai was prowling for the Hitokiri Battousai; if I hadn't become a rurouni for ten years; if Tomoe hadn't died; if I didn't join the war; if I didn't learn Hiten Mitsurugi; if shishou didn't rename little Shinta, Kenshin…
"Some people have a reason to return," I said. "Like I did."
Kaoru turned in her seat to look at me, eyelashes wet from her tears, but the tears were no longer flowing. A small smile was playing on her lips. "Truly, Kenshin?" She asked.
"Absolutely," I replied, tenderly wiping off the tears from her cheeks.
The atmosphere, or the wine, must have intoxicated me, because I kissed her that moment. When my lips touched hers, I couldn't believe I waited so long.
You'd think being deprived for more than a decade of any intimacy whatsoever would have made me move faster, but no, not me. Sessha the wanderer: Baka-edition.
Having god-like speed apparently didn't come with romance-privileges.
I never imagined it to feel this wonderful, cupping her jaw in my hand, showing her this tenderness. I wonder if I can…deepen it?
She did, and I could do nothing but respond and pull her into my arms.
Oh my goodness, if we don't stop now ten years of deprivation will beat me down to an unrecognizable pulp!
Besides, one needs air to live…
Our lips pulled apart and when I looked at her, her eyes were just fluttering open. "Kenshin…" she whispered. "I thought you would never…"
Even Kaoru knows I philander like a sloth. I chuckled. We didn't need to go into what took me so long. I'd screw up the explanations, and god knows I've been screwing everything up tonight. Well, this time, I'm going to do it right. "I love you, Kaoru. Everything is because of that."
A smile spread across her face, her cheeks flushing. "I know that now, silly. And for that, I love you too, but I wish you hadn't been so mysterious about it, Kenshin. You have no idea what kind of emotional highs and lows I had to go through just to figure out whether you had any feelings for me whatsoever…"
Oh yes I do, my sweet. That's one thing no man will ever have the privilege of saying to you.
"…I was terrified that Yahiko and Tsubame would get their act together before we did. Mou! Crying myself silly and what not. I ought to pound you on the head! Honestly, Kenshin! I thought that Enishi fiasco would do it for you, but no. You kept on sessha-ing and oro-ing me, Kaoru-dono, as if I was your landlady or something…"
She's so adorable, even like this, but I think I prefer it when her lips are occupied in some other way.
Ignoring her scolding, I kissed her again, it was even better than the last time.
I love her so much.
I wonder if people can get kicked out of a theatre for making out. I guess they could, but we weren't bothering anyone.
We were perfectly lost to the rest of the world.
I never knew how the play ended. Neither did Kaoru for that matter.
I think it was a tragedy, or someone surely died.
Glad I didn't see it. There will be no sad endings for me tonight.
Heck, no endings period.
For Kaoru and I, the curtain is just about to rise.
Part XIX: Encore…Perhaps?
I thought the play was a huge success.
I guess the audience thought so too, because they all stood up from their seats during curtain call and roses began to rain on stage when the hero and heroine stepped up.
With smiles on their faces, the actors gave a hearty bow.
The hero, who was made up to look dead, beamed at us and gave us a wink, throwing a rose back up at us. Kaoru and I blushed like anything, summoning her poise by holding up the rose in acknowledgment. I think he saw us…ahem…getting into the mood of the play.
When it was all over, I took Kaoru's hand and earned one of her adorable smiles.
Masaaki-dono and Ayumi-dono met us out at the grand hall with wide smiles.
"Wasn't that a splendid play?" Masaaki-dono asked us.
Kaoru smiled and tried to hide her blush. "Splendid," she said shyly. She sounded like Ayumi-dono.
Masaaki-dono raised an amused eyebrow, failing in holding down her smirk. "And how did you like your seats?"
"They were very nice, Masaaki-dono," Kaoru answered before I could say anything.
"Kaoru and I are grateful of those special seats, madam," I added with my rurouni smile.
"Well," began Masaaki-dono. "They weren't called 'special' for nothing." She finished with a wink.
Ayumi-dono giggled.
Oro! It occurred to me that I had just called Kaoru without an honorific, which of course, totally gave us away. Idiot-rurouni strikes again.
Everyone seems to be winking at us because of it. Either the whole audience had developed a bad case of eye-itch or those seats aren't as private as we thought.
Beating down her obvious embarrassment, Kaoru held her head high and exchanged more pleasantries with our new friends, promising that the next time we watched a play, we would give them a hello.
After the other ladies from the earlier Legion Against Resident Snots Who Picked On Idiot-Rurouni fussed over us for a few minutes, we left the theatre to meet our ride.
"How was the play, my lady?" Tsunan asked when he saw us.
I ought to sock him for "my lady-ing" my lady.
"It was perfect," Kaoru replied, beaming.
"Yes, quite perfect," I agreed, giving Kaoru a knowing look and squeezing her hand gently.
Tsunan arched an eyebrow and looked pointedly at our linked hands. "Hmm…apparently. Where to, Himura-sama?" He asked, opening the carriage door.
"Home," I replied, realizing with warmth just how much that was true with the Kamiya Dojo.
"Back to base, buddy," Tsunan said to Sano as I helped Kaoru inside the carriage.
"Sir, yes sir!" Sano replied with a smirk. "Psst! Himura-sama!"
Of course, rooster-head just couldn't wait to get the gory details. Not that I'd tell him.
"Later coachman," I said dryly, stepping into the carriage with Kaoru.
I think I heard Sano curse. Wouldn't be the first time.
Well, you can guess how he drove after that.
Heaped on the floor, Kaoru suddenly gave an exasperated sigh.
"Mou! That's quite enough of that!" She said. "Sanosuke! Stop this carriage right now!" She yelled at the top of her lungs.
Oro! She knows?
Of course she knows, moron! You're the only idiot around here!
The carriage came to a very rough stop, tossing Kaoru and I forward. Thank goodness for Kaoru I was around to cushion her crash. Thank goodness for me I had that consolation in exchange for the knock my battered body received yet again.
Kaoru slammed her foot against the carriage door, sending it flying wide open.
There was an "Oof!" and then a thump just outside the coach.
"Tsunan! Buddy! You alright?" Came Sano's voice from the driver's seat.
We soon discovered Tsunan knocked out on the ground, the coach-door swinging back and forth above his sprawled form.
Kaoru sighed and shook her head. She looked up at Sano and glared. "Sano, I tried to put up with it but I just couldn't any more! You drive like a lunatic! I've beaten Kenshin to a pulp and we weren't even fighting!"
"Hey! How'd you know it was me?" Sano asked, scratching his head.
"What, you think I'm stupid?" Responded Kaoru in a seriously insulted tone. "I recognized you the moment you pulled up in front of the dojo gate! Just because you're wearing fancy clothes and sporting a cheesy hairdo, it doesn't mean I didn't recognize your filthy mouth!"
"But you didn't recognize Tsunan 'till later in the evening…"
"Does Tsunan come to my home to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday? No!"
"What! I don't do that anymore!"
Kaoru looked extremely irritated. "Sano…that's not the point! The thing is…you're a lousy driver. I'm sorry. You got us around town, and I thank you for that, but enough is enough. Kenshin, do you mind walking the rest of the way?"
I blinked, suddenly realizing I was being addressed. "O-Of course not, Kaoru-chan…"
"Heeeeeeyyyyy! Kaoru-chan now, is it?" Sano drawled. "So Jou-chan, did the ole rurouni slip it?"
My eyes widened in horror at Sano's impossibly scandalous vulgarity.
Kaoru frowned. "Slip it? Slip what?" She turned to me questioningly. "Were you suppose to slip something, Kenshin…?"
Sano cackled loudly. "Oh, you know Jou-chan, when you and Kenshin were kis--"
"Kaoru-chan, Sano is just being silly," I said hastily, shooting Sano a deadly glare while I took her hand to distract her.
It didn't work as quickly as hoped.
"Well, Kenshin sort of fainted…he got a dizzy spell," Kaoru said thoughtfully. She turned to me again. "Is that what he meant by slip, Kenshin?"
O…Oro…how the heck am I going to explain this?
Sano sputtered in laughter. "You fainted? Again? Oh man! Jou-chan, what in hell's name did you do that got our nerves-of-steel hero here to pass out? Got a little too cozy on a first date, perhaps?"
Problem solved. That was enough to distract Kaoru permanently. However…
Kaoru turned red in the face from embarrassment. I turned red in the face for a completely different reason. That son-of-a…
"I didn't do anything!" Kaoru exclaimed. "It was some guy…anyway, I don't have to tell you! And what do you mean by 'again'? Kenshin, you should have told me you weren't feeling well today!"
"Maa…maa…" I said, raising my hands up in my patented Can't-We-All-Just-Get-Along way. "Kaoru, this unworthy one would have felt worse if he couldn't go out with you. It turned out for the best anyway, ne? I would not exchange this night for the world."
Kaoru blushed and grinned. "Definitely, Ken-chan," she said. "Are you really alright now, love?" She cooed, leaning her head on my shoulder affectionately.
Oh, isn't she just so sweet? My little sweetheart…Let me just kiss her…
"Ugh! You're killing me here! I can already see the ants crawling all over you!" Sano said, screwing up his face. "I think I will let you walk home. I don't want to give the carriage back to the carriage- company with a pest problem."
Did he mean that as a joke? Because, it isn't funny.
"Sanosuke, we'll talk tomorrow. Right now, Kaoru wants to walk home, if you please," I said evenly, managing to flash him a smile in spite of myself. "I thank you for everything. And I mean everything. This couldn't have been possible without you."
Sano waved a hand. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever, Kenshin. Are you sure you don't want to ride the rest of the way?"
"We'll be fine, Sano," Kaoru replied. "Oh, and don't forget Tsu-san over here."
"Oh yeah. Almost did," Sano responded dryly, getting down from his perch and going to his friend. He lifted Tsunan partway on his shoulder. "Upsy-daisy. You're gonna be all right, pal. Sanosuke's here to help."
Tsunan groaned, as if in response.
Couldn't blame him. TLC and Sano don't exactly mesh.
Sano rolled the unconscious Tsunan into the coach, getting the upper half of Tsunan's body on the compartment floor, then quite carelessly Sano folded Tsunan's legs up, stuffing him inside as rooster-head slammed the door shut.
The second groan that ensued from the poor invalid was lost on Sano's, "There. That ought to do it."
That did it all right…if Sano was hoping to kill his friend.
Kaoru and I could only stare speechlessly.
"Well, I guess it's time I make like a tree and shed," Sano said with a salute to us both.
"Er…" Kaoru began.
I squeezed her hand gently and signaled for her to let it pass. Leaves and shedding were relevant anyway in this season of fall, for whatever that's worth.
Kaoru clamped her mouth shut.
Sano got back up on the driver's seat and took the reigns. With a loud yell, he gave the horses a proper panic and went careening into the night.
"Kenshin, do you think they'll be okay?" Kaoru asked, watching as the cloud of dust dissipated.
"Don't worry about them, sweety," I replied, idly pushing some hair from her forehead. It wasn't unsightly. I just wanted to fuss over her.
I was rewarded by the warmth of her smile. "Kenshin, in spite of all the mishaps, this has been a wonderful night, ne?"
"Yes. The most wonderful," I replied. If there weren't so many people on the road, I would have pulled her into my arms and made known to her my sentiments more clearly. But since the idiot-rurouni knew propriety even if Battousai didn't (he's already whispering mischief), I contented myself with securing her hand in the crook of my arm. I saw a western couple walking like this once. Although I'm not really one to conform to western practices, I think I'm inclined to see how pleasant this particular practice is.
"And mou! Those tickets! Tell me the truth, Kenshin. Where did you buy them?" She asked me with an affectionate grin.
Women and their intuition.
I didn't have to fear her reproach or disdain though. "I lost the ones of which I am certain were perfectly legitimate and I had to tell Sano to buy new ones. I think they were really scalped."
Kaoru laughed and slapped my shoulder playfully. "Shame on you, rurouni! Poor Hiro-san! But who am I to complain, ne? I'm sure it was all Sano's doing, however. That man's got a rap sheet worthy of Saitoh's Sin-Swift-Slay. Three cheers for the resident delinquent!"
I couldn't agree more. "I never thought Sano's bad habits could be so convenient," I said with a chuckle.
Kaoru nodded and then kissed my cheek, to my utter delight. She gave a contented sigh and smiled at me. "Let's go home, Kenshin. After tonight, you deserve a good night's rest."
I smiled back, placing my hand over the one she had on my arm. "Yes. Tomorrow's going to be a new day to look forward to, love." Isn't it funny, that after all that fuss, it comes down to the fact that it doesn't take a mind reader to finally find true happiness? If I had just opened my eyes a bit wider, I would have known the Kamiya Kaoru that was the center and strength of our odd family.
We walked, enjoying the cool breeze of autumn. There was something to be said about making like a tree and "shedding" as Sano had so eloquently put. It made way for winter, and then a new spring more beautiful than the one before it.
Although the leaves had all but fallen to the ground, my spring has already arrived in the most precious package walking beside me…
Package…why is it nagging…?
Oro! I've completely forgotten about it!
To be continued…
Author's Note: Yep, it ain't over yet. There will be a bit more in the next one I'll post, but only to wrap things up. I'm sure you're asking…what's going to happen to that yard of cloth Kenshin bought? You'll see.