AUTHOR: Isa
EMAIL: neve4everr@aol.com
SUMMARY: I felt there was a lot unsaid between Jen and her mother and this is what came out of my thoughts. Okay, and I was kind of challenged, too.
RATING: TV-14
SPOILERS: Guess Who's Coming To Dinner - VERY SLIGHT S1 spoilers
DISCLAIMER: Let's see, this is going to take me a bit. I believe it's safe to say Jen Lindley belongs to Kevin Williamson, but I've got a feeling that her mother belongs to Paul Stupid I mean Stupin so I'll name him too.
Dear Mom,
I know I shouldn't write to you. If Dad finds out, he'll probably be angry. I cannot believe you lied to him about coming to visit me though.
I don't think you're as weak as you think you are. I think that's your cover, your shield so you don't actually have to feel anything. I know you love me and that you love Grams, but there's a lot more to love than just words and expressions, Mom.
Love is about being there for someone. About listening and talking and working things out. So you came here and we talked. Nothing was really resolved. I told you to call me because *I* had made peace with you guys sending me here. It had nothing to do with anything we discussed.
Maybe you think I stayed here all this time because of you, but that's not it at all. It wasn't because of Grams or even Dawson. It was about me.
When I first came out here, I wanted to hate it with a passion. The house and the Creek and even Dawson, I wanted to hate all of it.
And from the first moment I stepped onto the ground, and saw the sky and the water and the people that would soon become more of a family to me than you and Dad ever were, I realized that this was my home.
I fit in here. Maybe I didn't want to be head cheerleader or Homecoming Queen or any of the other things I've achieved (biggest scene at a friend's funeral is the one I'd most like to forget), but I belong in Capeside. This is my home. It always was, I just didn't know it.
Maybe someday, you and I can have a good relationship. I see Dawson with his mother sometimes, and I wonder what it would be like to get along that well with your parents. I know you and Dad would never be Mitch and Gale Leery, but I think I wish, at least for me, that you were.
Maybe things would be different if you hadn't run off to New York and married Dad right after college. Maybe we could've been a family.
Guess we'll never know.
Despite our past, I think we should try to get to know each other. Whoever I was when I was in New York, I'm a completely different person now. I don't know you and I want to.
So write to me, call me, maybe a visit for my next birthday. And a car would be nice, since I'm sick of going all over town in Pacey Witter's father's police car.
Love,
Jen