New Beginnings

New Beginnings

Part 2

Xander peeked in at him. "What's the problem here, Spike? Are you losin' it? 'Cuz, if you are, I'd like to get this on camera."

Spike's body flew toward the young man, embracing him with Slayer strength. "Oh, Xander! You gotta help me out of this…thing!"

Xander immediately became flustered, pawing and clawing at the vampire in a wild attempt at disengaging their bodies from one another. "What's your problem, man?! Get…OFF!"

"Xander, it's me. Buffy." Spike looked deep into his nemesis' eyes with a soft look of sadness that was uniquely Buffy's.

"No way!"

Spike managed to regain control and flung himself away from the boy with such force that he tripped backward and landed on his ass. "Bloody fuckin' hell! Argh!"

At the noise, Giles entered, face red. With the calm aggressiveness of Ripper, the Englishman ground out, "That is quite enough! You will not disgrace Buffy's memory with your petty bickering."

Unable to control himself, Spike's mouth blurted out with a Californian accent, "I'm touched, Giles, really I am. But I'm right here and you have to get me out. I am so not enjoying this trip into the life and body of William the Bloody." He then continued in the accent they were all accustomed to hear coming out of his face, "That's what I've been trying to tell you, Watcher. The Slayer's in my bleedin' head."

Silence descended like a black curtain.

"Wow." Xander's was the first mouth to move.

Then came Dawn's. She ran to embrace the vampire. "Oh, Buffy. I knew you wouldn't leave me." Although her affection was not for himself, Spike derived a certain amount of pleasure from this close encounter with the bitty Buffy. There was definitely something more between these women than just implanted memories and artificial emotions. The exchange of pure love gave him just a glimpse of what it was to be truly loved – which made his heart ache for Buffy all the more.

Spike's head began to fill with strange pictures, which he could only assume were memories coming from his reluctant houseguest. An infant held by a five year old girl. "Can I be the one to take care of her?" A thirteen year old taking the blame for a broken bottle of perfume in Mom and Dad's bedroom. A fourteen year old cuddling her nine year old sister as she cried over a skinned knee. Then, finally, a grown Slayer protecting Dawn with her life against two older vampires. One with black hair, the other platinum blonde.

At that memory, Buffy and Spike broke the hug, backed off from Dawn and grew quiet in reflection. After a moment of silence, Spike dropped his head. "I'm sorry, Buffy. I'm so sorry." His face then rose to greet the Slayer's sister. Tears filled his eyes. "Dawn."

"You really are, aren't you?"

"More than you can know."

At that, an event that never even happened helped to pave the way to the vampire's redemption in the eyes of his Slayer.

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"Can we please have one day that doesn't involve research mode?" Xander expressed his exasperation, accented with the slamming of a book.

Willow was quick to retort, "Well, I'm happy for research mode. The alternative is not very pretty." Xander nodded his head, then quickly opened another book.

Spike/Buffy had attempted to help, but only ended up fighting over every little thing. When to turn the page, how fast to scan the page, what position to sit in, whether or not to scratch that itch below the waist… Once Buffy threatened to cut off the first hand that made a move to touch "that", Spike had quit in a childish fit. "It itches, Slayer. What the bloody hell am I supposed to do?"

"I don't care what kind of self control you have to harness, there is not a thing on this planet, or any other, that could make me…Ugghh!"

The last the Scooby Gang heard was Spike's rich, deep laugh as they retreated to the training room.

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"Forget about how to fix this for just a minute. How the heck did Buffy get transferred to Spike's body? I mean, why him and not one of us?" Willow sometimes found thinking out loud to help her cognitive processes. Unlike Xander, who preferred Twinkies.

"I'm pretty certain Buffy's soul was moved to the closest being devoid of one. As to how or why, I have no clue." Giles removed his glasses and cleaned them with his handkerchief. "I'd venture to guess that we'll have to find a suitable host body to transfer her soul into. Of course, that is assuming we are able to find some sort of spell or ritual that would accomplish this."

Willow replied, "Maybe we could tweak the soul restoring spell a bit. You know, specify which soul to restore to the body."

"Wait a freakin' minute here. If we give Buffy another body, will she still be the Slayer? I mean, will she still have her kick ass strength and reflexes?"

Giles rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I don't know, Xander. I suppose that would be a small price to pay for having Buffy back."

The room grew quiet. This situation was becoming more complicated by the minute.

It was then that Anya interjected. "Well, what about Angel?" With a disgusted look on his face, Xander responded, "What about him?"

"Well, like you sort of mentioned, Willow, Angel's situation is much like Spike's now. Perhaps he would have some insight into the problem."

"I don't think so." Willow answered. "He's never wanted to remove his soul. I doubt he even knows as much about it as we do."

"Quite right. I fear we are all on our own with this one."

***************************************

"Will you stop pacing, Slayer? You are driving me batty!"

"Don't worry. You don't have far to go."

Spike forced her to stop. "Buffy?"

"Still here. Although I feel like a total idiot talking to myself, and I don't even sound like me. This has got to be the strangest thing…no. I think when Xander…"

"I…I want to apologize for getting you dead."

She stopped for a while, a bit confused and surprised at his declaration. "Huh? I'm the one who chose to die."

"But, you never would have done it if it weren't for me."

"Oh, stop flattering yourself, Spike. Not everything is about you."

He ignored the comment and continued. "I broke my promise to protect Dawn. I failed. If I hadn't lost that soddin' fight with Doc, her blood would have never been shed, and the portals would have never opened."

Buffy stood in silence for what seemed to Spike as forever.

"You did great, Spike."

"Psshhh! I bloody well buggared the whole thing is what I did!"

"No, you didn't. When Dawn needed you, you were there. I don't know how you knew, or how you did it, but you were there…protecting her with your life. Just as you promised."

The vampire would have loved to stop and revel in the compliment he had received, as he rarely got them from her. But there was one more thing on his mind. "But that's not all."

"What?"

"You didn't sacrifice yourself just for Dawn. You didn't even do it just to save the world. You finally got a taste of your bloody death wish."

"That's the most ridiculous…"

"And don't even try to deny it, 'cuz I smelled it on you. Ever since your mum passed, you've wanted to taste death. I should have done something right then."

"Say you're right. Say I felt it. What do you think you could have done about it?"

"Prob'ly nuthin'. But I owed it to you to at least try."

Buffy ran her fingers through what turned out to be Spike's hair. "You said you'd be there when I did...and have yourself a good day."

"Ironic, isn't it? Today was nearly the worst soddin' day of my life."

"You can't possibly mean that."

"If we weren't like this…" Spike motioned toward himself, "I would give you a charming, piercing glare."

"And I would…" Buffy suddenly clammed up.

"Nice one, Summers. I'm riveted by your sharp, witty comeback."

Buffy's consciousness remained quiet, making its host a bit nervous. "Slayer?"

While Buffy held her tongue, she could not hold back the memory of the vampire weeping at the sight of her dead body. Nor could she prevent her conflicted feelings about him from bubbling forth. Spike found himself bathed in tentative distrust, new found respect, and a touch of affection. Whether or not Buffy realized that her emotions were broadcast to the other consciousness, he did not know. But he did suspect that she would be mortified for him to be acutely aware of her kinder sentiments. He could get to like this setup. Oh yeah. This could be real good.

To Be Continued...