I'm alone, even with my son I feel alone. It was shortly after his birth, 8 years ago, when I made my worst mistake. It was a difficult time, I was without a job and my fiancée's couldn't support us four. Then I got a job offered but I had to move to London meanwhile she wanted to stay back at Japan. It started as a little discussion, continued as an argument, our first, and ended with both of us alone with one of the twins. Our daughter stays with her meanwhile our son stays with me. I never thought I'd make the same mistake as my parents, but this time it's worse, Daisuke, our son, doesn't even know that he's got a sister, Mimi. We named both past two of our best friends. I wished I'd still have contact to my friends, but after the break-up I decided to get some time for me and broke all connections. I even lost contact to my brother after his divorce two years ago, the last info I got was that he got a new job in the US. I think it's time to end my isolation even if I can never correct my mistakes, but Daisuke deserves me trying. Although he lives here most of his life, he's not happy here, due to being the only Japanese-looking person at school he always feels as an outsider. I'm lucky that my contract finally runs out and that I'm no longer bound to this country. But that's a decision I want to do with my son, not against him. And then I've to do something I should've done a long time before, tell him the truth… But that's nothing I should do now, better after we made our decision…
! "Dai, where are You ?"
! "Just a sec, dad…"
Sometimes I wonder how he could be this mature, most times he behaves more like an 11-years-old than 8-years-old boy. But that has to be something he got from his mom; she always behave much more mature as she had to be. It's somehow odd, he looks like my copy when I was in his age, he only got a few facets from his mom, but his behavior is much like hers. I wonder if Mimi is the opposite of him, looks like her mom and behaves like me…
"What's up, dad ?"
"Sit down, I think we should make a decision for us…"
"Huh ?"
"What do You think of moving ?"
"I dunno. Where ?" I see my son confused, neither happy nor sad, simply confused.
"I think of Tokyo, Japan, You know where Your grandparents live…" My son's eyes widen but I don't know if this is a good sign or a bad. "… but finally it's Your decision. If You want to go, we'll move there, if not we don't."
"Japan sounds great… Where would we stay ?"
"First at Your grandma until I find a new apartment for us, but I try to find one in the neighborhood, so don't worry." If he was exited then he's now on fire. I know he loves his grandparents, both he knows.
"When ?"
"As fast I can do some calls and set up the move. I'll tell You after that calls."
"Okay, dad." It was a long time ago I've seen him this happy. Now I know what I've to do.