TOW MONICA GOES HOME - Part Two
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters...
Rachel sat down with her cup of coffee and looked around at her friends.
"So what do you think they're doing?"
Ross shrugged and Phoebe was silent, but Joey smiled and nodded knowingly.
"Making up…" (AN: Think "Grandma's chicken salad" in TOW The One Hundredth…)
Rachel shot him an annoyed glance, and he got defensive.
"Hey, they could be! They haven't spoken to each other in a year! That's a lot of make up sex!"
Ross exhaled loudly and looked at Joey.
"First of all, that's my SISTER! Second of all, what makes you think they made up at all? Maybe they're still fighting."
"But they will make up, right?" Joey's face suddenly turned worried. "I mean, they can't keep fighting forever. They're lobsters, right Phoebs?"
Phoebe sighed and gave Joey a condescending smile. "No, Ross and Rachel were the lobsters. Not that it matters. I mean, you know, look what happened with them."
She shot both of them an evil look, and Joey joined in, staring at them scornfully.
"Yeah. What got into you guys anyway? Now Monica and Chandler can't be lobsters."
"Well, if you really want me to-" Ross started, but was interrupted quickly by Rachel.
"Ross, we all know the story. And no matter how many times you say it, it still doesn't make it right."
Ross leaned back in his chair, sulking. "Well, fine. But we did get married, that must count for…crabs or something."
Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Ross, everybody knows that crabs aren't monogamous. At least the males aren't. They can mate with one crab, and move on to the next in like, five-Ohhhh. Okay, you two can be crabs."
"But I don't want to be crabs, Phoebs!" Rachel stopped, thought about what she had just said, and sat back. "But we were talking about Chandler and Monica."
"Right." Phoebe nodded. "Chandler and Monica. Well, I think they made up. I'm getting very happy vibes from them."
Joey smiled, relieved. "Are you getting sex vibes too, Phoebs?"
"Yeah, Joey, but I can't tell if it's from Chandler and Monica. If you're too close, you completely mess up my sex readings."
Joey sat back and crossed his arms, proud of himself. "Yeah, baby." When Ross and Rachel gave him disgusted looks, he sat up straight and uncrossed his arms.
"Hey, but what about Chandler and Monica?"
"So, it turned out that the girl across the hall was the daughter of the owner of this great Italian restaurant, and he offered me an assistant chef position. I took it, of course. It doesn't pay as much as Allessandro's did, but Minneapolis is also a lot cheaper than New York."
Chandler nodded quietly, a little distressed by the smile on her face. It looked like she was happy there. It was selfish, but he had wanted to hear that she was miserable, that any life without him had no perks whatsoever. He was disappointed, but tried to hide his feelings behind what he hoped was an encouraging smile.
"So you like it there, huh?"
Monica looked down at what was left of her salad. "I guess so. I mean, it's not New York, but things have gone okay for me there."
Chandler nodded again, and motioned to the waitress that they were ready for the check. He paid it quickly, and they left the restaurant.
"Anywhere in particular you want to go?"
Monica thought for a second, then turned to him with a little smile. "Can we go to Central Perk? Even though we just ate, I've really missed just hanging out on that couch."
"Sure. Whatever you want."
A few minutes later, they entered the coffee house. Chandler put out a hand to stop Monica in the doorway, and motioned to their friends, who were talking quietly on the couch.
"How much you wanna bet they're talking about us?" He whispered in her ear, and Monica almost laughed. It was obvious by the intense expressions on their faces that they were gossiping about someone. And she and Chandler were the only two people they knew that weren't involved in the conversation.
"Betting always got us in trouble before." Monica whispered back. "But this time I think it's safe to assume you're right."
Chandler sauntered over to the couch with Monica right behind him, and listened for just a moment before he tapped Rachel on the shoulder. She turned around, guilt already written on her face.
"Don't you know you're not supposed to talk about people when they're right behind you, Rach?"
"Don't you know it's not nice to sneak up on people, Chandler?" Rachel retorted, unaffected by Chandler's accusation. "Besides, we weren't talking about you. We were, um, just… guessing..."
"Care to fill us in, Rach?" Monica tried to sound threatening, but it was all she could do to keep from laughing.
Rachel shot a panicked look at Ross, then back at Monica. "Nooo..."
Monica shook her head and went to the counter to order coffee. As soon as she stepped away, Phoebe grabbed Chandler and pulled him down onto the couch.
"So?"
"So?" He mimicked her, knowing exactly what she was asking, but unsure of how to answer it.
"So, are you back together?"
"Back together? Yeah, that would be no. We talked and got some things out in the open, but it's just not that-" He was interrupted when Monica made her way back to him, and handed him a cup of coffee. She sat down at the table, glancing at them over her cup. The small table had never seemed separate from the couch and coffee table before, but now she felt like she was miles away from the rest of them. They had stopped talking as soon as she returned, and she felt very much like an outsider. At any other time, Phoebe and Rachel would have pulled her into the ladies' room and questioned her intensely about the events of the day. But it was obvious from their seating arrangement and Chandler's nervous face that they had chosen to question him instead. She sighed, and spoke up nervously.
"You don't have to stop talking just because I'm back."
Joey gave her a bright smile, and rose from his spot on the end of the couch to sit with her. Monica gave him a grateful look, and Chandler kicked himself for not thinking to sit with her himself. He felt even worse when Joey leaned toward Monica and whispered to her, but loudly enough for the rest to hear.
"They're just embarrassed 'cause they were trying to get Chandler to tell them what you talked about today."
Rachel and Phoebe blushed, and Chandler cleared his throat awkwardly. Monica gave him a slight smile.
"And what did Chandler tell you?"
"I told them that we talked about some things, and everything else is between you and me."
His eyes met Monica's, and she thanked him silently. He gave her a slight nod, then turned to the others, hoping to divert attention away from himself and Monica.
"What have you guys been doing all day? Just sitting around the coffeehouse gossiping?"
"Do we do anything else?"
"Well…No, I guess not."
They contemplated that for a moment, until Phoebe threw her hands in the air and screamed out excitedly.
"Ooh, Ross and Rachel are crabs!"
Chandler and Monica shot each other confused looks as Ross and Rachel flushed and shrunk down in their chairs.
"Well, I know that changes my life…" Chandler remarked with a smirk.
"And there it is. Monica's back for a day, and Chandler's right back to being sarcastic and annoying. Just when I was getting used to him being all moody and depressed all the time."
Chandler glanced at Ross, trying to come up with a quick comeback, but actually thinking about his comment. It was true, he was sure. He hadn't been "normal" since she left. He looked over at Monica, who was watching him for his reaction. He knew that things were far from resolved between them, but he had to admit that just having her near him made him feel more like himself. Chandler pushed the thought away and stood up.
"Well, sarcastic or not, I still have some shopping to do for a certain girl's birthday." He grinned at Rachel, who blushed and tried to hide her excitement. "I'll see you guys later." He glanced at Monica, and motioned with his head toward the door. She got the message, and walked out with him, away from the curious eyes of their friends.
"Can we meet up again later? I want to give you some time with everyone else, but I'd really like to see you tonight."
"Of course. Do you want me to cook?"
Chandler smiled shyly at her. "That sounds great. It seems like forever since I've tasted your food. I've been living on take-out and Rachel's version of eggs."
"I'll make your favorite then. Macaroni and cheese with hotdogs."
Chandler laughed. "You can make whatever you want. You know I love anything you cook. I'll be home by six, so I'll just meet you there, okay?"
"Okay." She marveled at how routine it sounded. And amazingly enough, she was actually looking forward to the evening with him. Only a day ago, she had been afraid to even be in the same room with him.
Chandler hesitated, then brushed his lips lightly against her forehead. "I'll see you then. Enjoy your afternoon."
Monica nodded, a little surprised by the kiss, but touched. "I will. And good luck finding something Rachel will actually keep."
Chandler laughed and waved his hand as he walked away. Monica stood there for a moment, watching his familiar figure move down the street, then walked back into Central Perk and her curious friends.
"Hey, Monica, I'm back!"
He glanced around the apartment, wondering where she was. He could smell the food cooking, and knew that she had followed through on her promise to make his favorite. He was laying his bag down on the couch when she came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel, and looking self-conscious.
"Hey. You're back sooner than I thought."
"Uh…yeah." He swallowed, trying not to focus on her. "I already had something in mind, so it didn't take me as long as it usually does." He looked down at his feet, as embarrassed about being embarrassed as he was about her lack of clothing. It had never bothered him before, even before they had started dating, but now he could feel the color creeping into his face.
"Okay. Well, I'll, um, go get dressed." Monica escaped quickly into the bedroom and shut the door behind her, surprised to find herself wishing she had showered at Ross's. She hated feeling self-conscious around him, especially when it was for such a silly reason. She couldn't help thinking that either of them dressed in a towel used to be a good excuse to get naked, but didn't let herself dwell on the thought. She quickly changed into the dress she had already laid out, momentarily wondering if it was too much for a casual evening with Chandler. She put it on anyway, and quickly put her hair in a clip before walking out. He spoke to her from the couch as soon as she came back into the room.
"We used to put both of our names on the card."
Monica paused, surprised by his bluntness. She had expected them to tiptoe around their relationship, or lack thereof, until after dinner - if they discussed it at all.
"Yeah…I remember the first time I signed both of our names. I sat there and stared at them for like half an hour…" Monica trailed off, not wanting to travel down that path. "So, what did you get Rachel?"
Chandler sighed, and pulled a box out of the bag. "She saw these boots while we were shopping a couple of weeks ago, but they were too expensive. I thought I'd surprise her. She deserves something special, after all I've put her through."
Monica nodded, and sat down beside him. "I've never had that much trouble shopping for Rachel before, but this year, I didn't have a clue. I finally just got her a sweater, but I don't even know if she'll like it."
"All Rachel really wanted is for you to be here. And you are. Oh, did Ross tell you about the party tomorrow night?"
"Yeah, I know about the party." She deliberately failed to mention that it was the "reason" she had returned to New York.
"I'm so glad you're going to be there. It'll mean a lot to her. Well, to all of us."
Monica gave him a smile just as the oven timer went off.
"Well, dinner is served."
Chandler smiled back, half-relieved at the interruption. "Great. I'll get us some wine."
They sat down together at the table, and concentrated on their plates of food. After a few bites, Chandler looked up at her.
"This is great. I've missed having you cook for me. Not even the best restaurant in New York is this good."
Monica met his eyes and smiled.
"Liar," she responded, but she couldn't keep her cheeks from flushing at the compliment. Chandler smiled too, suddenly feeling like he was on a first date. He laughed to himself when he realized that he had never actually had a first date with her. Not a real one, anyway. He shook the thought away and pushed back his plate.
"Thank you, Mon, that was wonderful…as always. I'll do the dishes, okay?"
"You don't have to, Chandler. I'll do them."
"Well, if you insist, you can help. But I'm still going to do them. You shouldn't have to cook and do the dishes too."
"I always did before."
Chandler stopped and looked at her. "I know. And I'm sorry about that. Things have changed since then, and this is something that's going to change with them."
"It doesn't matter, Chandler. I like to cook and clean, remember? I liked taking care of you."
"I know that, too. But I've learned how to take care of myself lately, and I'm going to keep doing that, whether you're here or not."
Monica looked away from him at that comment, and Chandler closed his eyes. He hadn't meant to sound so callous. He had actually intended for it to sound lighthearted and teasing, and he certainly hadn't meant for it to imply anything about her recent absence.
"I'm sorry, Mon. It wasn't supposed to come out like that."
Monica just looked at him and forced a smile.
"Don't apologize. We can't keep weighing everything we say to each other, or it won't get any better."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. But still-"
"It's okay. Really."
"Okay. But I am sorry."
Monica gave him a smile, hoping to put him at ease, and nodded as they turned their attention to the dishes. The work went quickly, and soon they were seated on the couch next to each other, both wondering what was going to happen next. They had never felt uncomfortable with each other before, and neither liked the new air of awkwardness that surrounded them.
"So…" Chandler began, stopping when he realized he didn't have anything to follow the one word.
Monica looked at him questioningly. "So?" She encouraged, her eyes on his face.
"So…I have no idea what was supposed to come after that. You were supposed to fill in the blank."
Monica laughed slightly, and her laughter broke the tension. Chandler glanced at her with relief in his eyes.
"Do you wanna watch a movie or something?" That has to be easier than this, Chandler thought sadly.
"Yeah, that's fine. Do you have anything good?"
"Well, all of your sappy romance movies are still there, and of course my copy of "Die Hard"…"
Monica tried to hide a smile, and picked up the remote.
"You choose. I'll even watch "Die Hard" if you want."
Chandler grinned and popped in the tape before she could change her mind. He sat back down next to her and sighed happily as the opening credits appeared. Monica smiled at his childish enthusiasm, and tried to get into the movie for his sake.
As the ending credits rolled, Chandler looked at Monica. With her next to him, he hadn't paid attention to a minute of the movie. And she had been asleep for the last hour or so, her head resting lightly against his shoulder, which completely ruined any chances of him thinking about anything but her. After a good bit of maneuvering, he managed to get himself out from under her without waking her up, then lifted her gently into his arms. He froze when she moved her head, but she didn't wake up. He walked carefully into the room they had once shared, and laid her down on the bed, removing her shoes and covering her carefully. He had decided halfway through the movie that he would call Ross and tell him that Monica could just sleep there tonight. It wouldn't hurt anything, and he slept in the guest room anyway.
Chandler sat gingerly on the bed beside her, and gazed at her peaceful face for a long time. He had often watched her sleep while she was lying in his arms, studying her face and wondering what he had done to deserve her. He loved watching her wake up, and seeing her smile when her eyes opened and met his. Waking up alone had been one of the hardest things to bear while she had been gone.
He reached out to gently brush her hair away from her face, then kissed her gently on the forehead.
"I missed you, Mon." He whispered, the words catching in his throat. "I missed you so much. Sweet dreams, sweetheart." He paused, and stared at her a moment before he added, so softly that he could barely hear the words himself. "I love you."
He started to rise from the bed, but was stopped by her hand on his. He looked down at her, and saw that her blue eyes were now open, and she was smiling up at him.
"I love you too."
Nothing else was said. She released his hand and closed her eyes again, making Chandler wonder if he had dreamed the words. He stood beside the bed for a moment, wondering what he should do next. Finally, he smiled to himself, leaned down to brush his lips against her cheek, and walked out into the kitchen to call Ross.
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters...
Rachel sat down with her cup of coffee and looked around at her friends.
"So what do you think they're doing?"
Ross shrugged and Phoebe was silent, but Joey smiled and nodded knowingly.
"Making up…" (AN: Think "Grandma's chicken salad" in TOW The One Hundredth…)
Rachel shot him an annoyed glance, and he got defensive.
"Hey, they could be! They haven't spoken to each other in a year! That's a lot of make up sex!"
Ross exhaled loudly and looked at Joey.
"First of all, that's my SISTER! Second of all, what makes you think they made up at all? Maybe they're still fighting."
"But they will make up, right?" Joey's face suddenly turned worried. "I mean, they can't keep fighting forever. They're lobsters, right Phoebs?"
Phoebe sighed and gave Joey a condescending smile. "No, Ross and Rachel were the lobsters. Not that it matters. I mean, you know, look what happened with them."
She shot both of them an evil look, and Joey joined in, staring at them scornfully.
"Yeah. What got into you guys anyway? Now Monica and Chandler can't be lobsters."
"Well, if you really want me to-" Ross started, but was interrupted quickly by Rachel.
"Ross, we all know the story. And no matter how many times you say it, it still doesn't make it right."
Ross leaned back in his chair, sulking. "Well, fine. But we did get married, that must count for…crabs or something."
Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Ross, everybody knows that crabs aren't monogamous. At least the males aren't. They can mate with one crab, and move on to the next in like, five-Ohhhh. Okay, you two can be crabs."
"But I don't want to be crabs, Phoebs!" Rachel stopped, thought about what she had just said, and sat back. "But we were talking about Chandler and Monica."
"Right." Phoebe nodded. "Chandler and Monica. Well, I think they made up. I'm getting very happy vibes from them."
Joey smiled, relieved. "Are you getting sex vibes too, Phoebs?"
"Yeah, Joey, but I can't tell if it's from Chandler and Monica. If you're too close, you completely mess up my sex readings."
Joey sat back and crossed his arms, proud of himself. "Yeah, baby." When Ross and Rachel gave him disgusted looks, he sat up straight and uncrossed his arms.
"Hey, but what about Chandler and Monica?"
"So, it turned out that the girl across the hall was the daughter of the owner of this great Italian restaurant, and he offered me an assistant chef position. I took it, of course. It doesn't pay as much as Allessandro's did, but Minneapolis is also a lot cheaper than New York."
Chandler nodded quietly, a little distressed by the smile on her face. It looked like she was happy there. It was selfish, but he had wanted to hear that she was miserable, that any life without him had no perks whatsoever. He was disappointed, but tried to hide his feelings behind what he hoped was an encouraging smile.
"So you like it there, huh?"
Monica looked down at what was left of her salad. "I guess so. I mean, it's not New York, but things have gone okay for me there."
Chandler nodded again, and motioned to the waitress that they were ready for the check. He paid it quickly, and they left the restaurant.
"Anywhere in particular you want to go?"
Monica thought for a second, then turned to him with a little smile. "Can we go to Central Perk? Even though we just ate, I've really missed just hanging out on that couch."
"Sure. Whatever you want."
A few minutes later, they entered the coffee house. Chandler put out a hand to stop Monica in the doorway, and motioned to their friends, who were talking quietly on the couch.
"How much you wanna bet they're talking about us?" He whispered in her ear, and Monica almost laughed. It was obvious by the intense expressions on their faces that they were gossiping about someone. And she and Chandler were the only two people they knew that weren't involved in the conversation.
"Betting always got us in trouble before." Monica whispered back. "But this time I think it's safe to assume you're right."
Chandler sauntered over to the couch with Monica right behind him, and listened for just a moment before he tapped Rachel on the shoulder. She turned around, guilt already written on her face.
"Don't you know you're not supposed to talk about people when they're right behind you, Rach?"
"Don't you know it's not nice to sneak up on people, Chandler?" Rachel retorted, unaffected by Chandler's accusation. "Besides, we weren't talking about you. We were, um, just… guessing..."
"Care to fill us in, Rach?" Monica tried to sound threatening, but it was all she could do to keep from laughing.
Rachel shot a panicked look at Ross, then back at Monica. "Nooo..."
Monica shook her head and went to the counter to order coffee. As soon as she stepped away, Phoebe grabbed Chandler and pulled him down onto the couch.
"So?"
"So?" He mimicked her, knowing exactly what she was asking, but unsure of how to answer it.
"So, are you back together?"
"Back together? Yeah, that would be no. We talked and got some things out in the open, but it's just not that-" He was interrupted when Monica made her way back to him, and handed him a cup of coffee. She sat down at the table, glancing at them over her cup. The small table had never seemed separate from the couch and coffee table before, but now she felt like she was miles away from the rest of them. They had stopped talking as soon as she returned, and she felt very much like an outsider. At any other time, Phoebe and Rachel would have pulled her into the ladies' room and questioned her intensely about the events of the day. But it was obvious from their seating arrangement and Chandler's nervous face that they had chosen to question him instead. She sighed, and spoke up nervously.
"You don't have to stop talking just because I'm back."
Joey gave her a bright smile, and rose from his spot on the end of the couch to sit with her. Monica gave him a grateful look, and Chandler kicked himself for not thinking to sit with her himself. He felt even worse when Joey leaned toward Monica and whispered to her, but loudly enough for the rest to hear.
"They're just embarrassed 'cause they were trying to get Chandler to tell them what you talked about today."
Rachel and Phoebe blushed, and Chandler cleared his throat awkwardly. Monica gave him a slight smile.
"And what did Chandler tell you?"
"I told them that we talked about some things, and everything else is between you and me."
His eyes met Monica's, and she thanked him silently. He gave her a slight nod, then turned to the others, hoping to divert attention away from himself and Monica.
"What have you guys been doing all day? Just sitting around the coffeehouse gossiping?"
"Do we do anything else?"
"Well…No, I guess not."
They contemplated that for a moment, until Phoebe threw her hands in the air and screamed out excitedly.
"Ooh, Ross and Rachel are crabs!"
Chandler and Monica shot each other confused looks as Ross and Rachel flushed and shrunk down in their chairs.
"Well, I know that changes my life…" Chandler remarked with a smirk.
"And there it is. Monica's back for a day, and Chandler's right back to being sarcastic and annoying. Just when I was getting used to him being all moody and depressed all the time."
Chandler glanced at Ross, trying to come up with a quick comeback, but actually thinking about his comment. It was true, he was sure. He hadn't been "normal" since she left. He looked over at Monica, who was watching him for his reaction. He knew that things were far from resolved between them, but he had to admit that just having her near him made him feel more like himself. Chandler pushed the thought away and stood up.
"Well, sarcastic or not, I still have some shopping to do for a certain girl's birthday." He grinned at Rachel, who blushed and tried to hide her excitement. "I'll see you guys later." He glanced at Monica, and motioned with his head toward the door. She got the message, and walked out with him, away from the curious eyes of their friends.
"Can we meet up again later? I want to give you some time with everyone else, but I'd really like to see you tonight."
"Of course. Do you want me to cook?"
Chandler smiled shyly at her. "That sounds great. It seems like forever since I've tasted your food. I've been living on take-out and Rachel's version of eggs."
"I'll make your favorite then. Macaroni and cheese with hotdogs."
Chandler laughed. "You can make whatever you want. You know I love anything you cook. I'll be home by six, so I'll just meet you there, okay?"
"Okay." She marveled at how routine it sounded. And amazingly enough, she was actually looking forward to the evening with him. Only a day ago, she had been afraid to even be in the same room with him.
Chandler hesitated, then brushed his lips lightly against her forehead. "I'll see you then. Enjoy your afternoon."
Monica nodded, a little surprised by the kiss, but touched. "I will. And good luck finding something Rachel will actually keep."
Chandler laughed and waved his hand as he walked away. Monica stood there for a moment, watching his familiar figure move down the street, then walked back into Central Perk and her curious friends.
"Hey, Monica, I'm back!"
He glanced around the apartment, wondering where she was. He could smell the food cooking, and knew that she had followed through on her promise to make his favorite. He was laying his bag down on the couch when she came out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel, and looking self-conscious.
"Hey. You're back sooner than I thought."
"Uh…yeah." He swallowed, trying not to focus on her. "I already had something in mind, so it didn't take me as long as it usually does." He looked down at his feet, as embarrassed about being embarrassed as he was about her lack of clothing. It had never bothered him before, even before they had started dating, but now he could feel the color creeping into his face.
"Okay. Well, I'll, um, go get dressed." Monica escaped quickly into the bedroom and shut the door behind her, surprised to find herself wishing she had showered at Ross's. She hated feeling self-conscious around him, especially when it was for such a silly reason. She couldn't help thinking that either of them dressed in a towel used to be a good excuse to get naked, but didn't let herself dwell on the thought. She quickly changed into the dress she had already laid out, momentarily wondering if it was too much for a casual evening with Chandler. She put it on anyway, and quickly put her hair in a clip before walking out. He spoke to her from the couch as soon as she came back into the room.
"We used to put both of our names on the card."
Monica paused, surprised by his bluntness. She had expected them to tiptoe around their relationship, or lack thereof, until after dinner - if they discussed it at all.
"Yeah…I remember the first time I signed both of our names. I sat there and stared at them for like half an hour…" Monica trailed off, not wanting to travel down that path. "So, what did you get Rachel?"
Chandler sighed, and pulled a box out of the bag. "She saw these boots while we were shopping a couple of weeks ago, but they were too expensive. I thought I'd surprise her. She deserves something special, after all I've put her through."
Monica nodded, and sat down beside him. "I've never had that much trouble shopping for Rachel before, but this year, I didn't have a clue. I finally just got her a sweater, but I don't even know if she'll like it."
"All Rachel really wanted is for you to be here. And you are. Oh, did Ross tell you about the party tomorrow night?"
"Yeah, I know about the party." She deliberately failed to mention that it was the "reason" she had returned to New York.
"I'm so glad you're going to be there. It'll mean a lot to her. Well, to all of us."
Monica gave him a smile just as the oven timer went off.
"Well, dinner is served."
Chandler smiled back, half-relieved at the interruption. "Great. I'll get us some wine."
They sat down together at the table, and concentrated on their plates of food. After a few bites, Chandler looked up at her.
"This is great. I've missed having you cook for me. Not even the best restaurant in New York is this good."
Monica met his eyes and smiled.
"Liar," she responded, but she couldn't keep her cheeks from flushing at the compliment. Chandler smiled too, suddenly feeling like he was on a first date. He laughed to himself when he realized that he had never actually had a first date with her. Not a real one, anyway. He shook the thought away and pushed back his plate.
"Thank you, Mon, that was wonderful…as always. I'll do the dishes, okay?"
"You don't have to, Chandler. I'll do them."
"Well, if you insist, you can help. But I'm still going to do them. You shouldn't have to cook and do the dishes too."
"I always did before."
Chandler stopped and looked at her. "I know. And I'm sorry about that. Things have changed since then, and this is something that's going to change with them."
"It doesn't matter, Chandler. I like to cook and clean, remember? I liked taking care of you."
"I know that, too. But I've learned how to take care of myself lately, and I'm going to keep doing that, whether you're here or not."
Monica looked away from him at that comment, and Chandler closed his eyes. He hadn't meant to sound so callous. He had actually intended for it to sound lighthearted and teasing, and he certainly hadn't meant for it to imply anything about her recent absence.
"I'm sorry, Mon. It wasn't supposed to come out like that."
Monica just looked at him and forced a smile.
"Don't apologize. We can't keep weighing everything we say to each other, or it won't get any better."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. But still-"
"It's okay. Really."
"Okay. But I am sorry."
Monica gave him a smile, hoping to put him at ease, and nodded as they turned their attention to the dishes. The work went quickly, and soon they were seated on the couch next to each other, both wondering what was going to happen next. They had never felt uncomfortable with each other before, and neither liked the new air of awkwardness that surrounded them.
"So…" Chandler began, stopping when he realized he didn't have anything to follow the one word.
Monica looked at him questioningly. "So?" She encouraged, her eyes on his face.
"So…I have no idea what was supposed to come after that. You were supposed to fill in the blank."
Monica laughed slightly, and her laughter broke the tension. Chandler glanced at her with relief in his eyes.
"Do you wanna watch a movie or something?" That has to be easier than this, Chandler thought sadly.
"Yeah, that's fine. Do you have anything good?"
"Well, all of your sappy romance movies are still there, and of course my copy of "Die Hard"…"
Monica tried to hide a smile, and picked up the remote.
"You choose. I'll even watch "Die Hard" if you want."
Chandler grinned and popped in the tape before she could change her mind. He sat back down next to her and sighed happily as the opening credits appeared. Monica smiled at his childish enthusiasm, and tried to get into the movie for his sake.
As the ending credits rolled, Chandler looked at Monica. With her next to him, he hadn't paid attention to a minute of the movie. And she had been asleep for the last hour or so, her head resting lightly against his shoulder, which completely ruined any chances of him thinking about anything but her. After a good bit of maneuvering, he managed to get himself out from under her without waking her up, then lifted her gently into his arms. He froze when she moved her head, but she didn't wake up. He walked carefully into the room they had once shared, and laid her down on the bed, removing her shoes and covering her carefully. He had decided halfway through the movie that he would call Ross and tell him that Monica could just sleep there tonight. It wouldn't hurt anything, and he slept in the guest room anyway.
Chandler sat gingerly on the bed beside her, and gazed at her peaceful face for a long time. He had often watched her sleep while she was lying in his arms, studying her face and wondering what he had done to deserve her. He loved watching her wake up, and seeing her smile when her eyes opened and met his. Waking up alone had been one of the hardest things to bear while she had been gone.
He reached out to gently brush her hair away from her face, then kissed her gently on the forehead.
"I missed you, Mon." He whispered, the words catching in his throat. "I missed you so much. Sweet dreams, sweetheart." He paused, and stared at her a moment before he added, so softly that he could barely hear the words himself. "I love you."
He started to rise from the bed, but was stopped by her hand on his. He looked down at her, and saw that her blue eyes were now open, and she was smiling up at him.
"I love you too."
Nothing else was said. She released his hand and closed her eyes again, making Chandler wonder if he had dreamed the words. He stood beside the bed for a moment, wondering what he should do next. Finally, he smiled to himself, leaned down to brush his lips against her cheek, and walked out into the kitchen to call Ross.