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Wild Dreaming
by animefreak
Tomoyo woke up in the morning after a good night rest. Apparently, she heard nothing. She quickly noticed that Sakura wasn't in her bed, but figured she was in the bathroom, so she didn't worry.
"Good morning, Sakura!" she beamed "I hope you had some rest, because today is our last day. These trips are too short, ne? I need to practice a lot more if I want to keep my skiing skills untouched, don't you agree?"
No response.
"Sakura?" she frowned, a slight twinge of worry present in her soft voice.
Still no response. With this, Tomoyo got out of bed and knocked on the bathroom door. The door swung open.
"Sa-Sakura?"
She peeked inside, to find the bathroom empty. Maybe she went out for a walk, she thought. Tomoyo cast a glance at Sakura's unmade bed, and noticed her robe lying on the floor, beside her slippers. Her suitcase was untouched. Weird things had happened before, so Tomoyo was already freaking out. She sat on her bed. Think, think, think, Tomoyo, think! she scratched her head in deep concern.
That was when Sakura's auburn head popped carefully through the door.
"Sakura! Where were you?!" Tomoyo yelled at her "I thought something had happened to you!!"
"I'm sorry" she returned, sweetly "I had bit of a...problem"
"Problem? What problem? Where were you?"
She fidgeted, blushing furiously "With...Syaoran..."
"WHAT?!" she yelled louder this time, making Sakura jump at her to cover her mouth.
"Tomoyo!! You'll wake everyone up!" she whispered nervously "It's a really long story" she blushed again "And I'm really hungry. How about we get dressed and go grab a bite?" Sakura was obviously reluctant to tell her, which meant something big was about to happen. Tomoyo decided to give it a rest. She would find out, however. The thought brought a small grin to her lips.
"That'll be great. This green coat" she started "goes with these pants. And the boots are just so comfortable. I had them lined in fur. Try them on!" she urged, wide friendly smile plastered to her pretty face.
That's Tomoyo for you, ladies and gentlemen, Sakura thought with a giggle.
*****
After breakfast everyone rushed out to make the most out of the last day of the school trip. It was really cold, but the weather was great for skiing. Tomoyo was feeling a little bolder today, and decided to give the intermediate course a go.
"Are you coming, Sakura?"
"I'd rather stay here, Tomoyo, if you don't mind" she returned tiredly.
"Well, I'll be back by lunchtime. I'll see you!" and she waved her goodbye as she walked away.
So, I'm on my own, Sakura thought. She so wanted to return home. This trip had drained her both emotionally and physically; she longed for the security of her own bedroom, her own house in old Tomoeda, her father, Touya's frowning face...Kero...she felt like she'd been away from home a million years yet it was only one weekend. One very long weekend for the record.
She made her way slowly back to the lodge. She felt a hundred years old, like she was carrying the weight of the world on her skinny little shoulders. She didn't look like the same Sakura she was on friday afternoon when they left Tomoeda. She looked so sad, so tired. She left her backpack in her room, and went out to the cafeteria for a cup of tea. Good thing she was alone and she could do some serious thinking.
Syaoran had promised her they would figure things out together, like they always did. She couldn't forget the determination in his voice; the way he vehemently, almost desperately wanted her to believe him when he assured her that he wouldn't let anyone or anything hurt her. He had never told her he cared for her, but he certainly made it clear, whether he realized it or not. That was one of the things that made her love him so. Wait a minute. Had she just...admitted that she...
She always knew she felt a twinge of attraction towards him. What girl wouldn't? He was clever, talented...and drop dead gorgeous. She felt a blush creep up her cheeks at that thought. But she never thought the day would come when she would so casually admit that she was in love with him. Had this developed inside her without her even knowing about it? What was she going to do about this?
Because once you admit this to yourself there's no turning back. Was this the reason why she had had that dream? Because not knowingly she had fallen in love with the Chinese warrior? But...that hadn't been the kind of dream any seventeen years old had when she discovered she'd fallen in love. She wasn't sure whether it was pleasure or deep shame what she felt when she thought about it. Maybe both...
"I don't want to think about this anymore!" she groaned, squeezing her head with both her hands in exasperation.
"About what?" a very familiar voice questioned from behind her, making her jump a mile high in the air. "Did I startle you?" he tried to joke, though the customary scowl remained where it had always been.
"S-Syaoran! I-It's okay..." she blushed fiercely "I was..."
"Thinking aloud" he completed for her "Are you feeling any better?"
"Yeah, thanks" she replied softly.
"What was that you were saying?" he decided to insist for no reason.
Sakura blushed again, wanting and not wanting to answer him. She wished she could share everything with him, but she didn't know how. She didn't know how he would react to it. How he'd take it. She had this thing going on in her life right now, this feeling on the corner of her mind that kept nagging, refusing to be ignored, that danger lurked close to her. Close to them. She couldn't let things get any more complicated. She knew that maybe someday she would be forced to confront Syaoran about her feelings for him. But now was definitely not the time.
"Sakura?"
"You know, Syaoran..." she began, hesitantly "the night we arrived here, I had a very bizarre dream...that kept me up all night...right before the weird things began to happen..."
Syaoran winced at that. Sakura noticed this, but chose to go on with what little she could tell him about the whole thing without giving herself away.
"I don't think it had anything to do with it, but you could never know" she blushed "anyway, I haven't been able to...get it off my mind since it happened and...I'm thinking maybe...it's making me overreact about everything. I'm really embarrassed about the sobbing fit, and keeping you up all night..."
"I don't think we should take this lightly anyway" he replied, gathering his thoughts before they drifted off to those images of her he wasn't able to erase from his mind "I want to know what was that that scared you so much. You're not like that, Sakura"
"I--I also want to find out" she sighed discouragedly.
Syaoran suddenly blushed and turned his eyes to his gloved hands folded on his lap. "Tell me something, Sakura" he began whispering, deeply ashamed about what he was going to ask.
"Yes?"
"What--what was your dream about?"
Sakura's eyes flew open, her breath locked in her throat, a deep crimson blush burning her cheeks. She couldn't possibly tell him.
"I can't...remember..." she stammered.
I shouldn't have asked, he thought. It was so obvious that she was lying. But why? If she only knew about the dream he had had...it couldn't possibly be worse. Nothing could be. He decided not to push it, as not to embarrass her any further.
"I can't wait to get back home" Sakura changed the subject quickly.
"Me too. I've never liked the cold"
"Why did you come then?" she asked innocently.
If she only knew. He would willingly follow her to the moon and back if she only asked. He had come to this stupid school trip because of her. Ever since he realized he was in love with her a single day away from her was like burning in hell. And he couldn't tell her. Li Syaoran, future leader of one of the most powerful clans in the world, brave warrior and direct descendant of Clow Reed, became a frightened little boy whenever he was around the lovely Card Captor. All she had to do was smile one of those million watt smile at him to make him go weak on the knees. But he just couldn't tell her. He wouldn't survive a rejection from her.
"I don't know. I just did" he replied simply.
There was nothing else he could say to her. Or that she could say to him. They felt exactly the same way, even though they didn't know it. So they just sat there, quietly sipping tea, averting each other's eyes.
*****
Sakura felt a heavy weight lift off her shoulders when she spotted the bright lights of Tomoeda twinkling in the dark. She was so tired, and still had plenty of stuff to sort out. The thing that she'd seen back at the mountains. The weird dream she'd had, about Syaoran and herself...Syaoran. She just couldn't get him off her mind. He was sitting behind her once again, quiet as usual. She so wished he would come sit by her side and say something. Anything at all.
Everything was somehow unimportant to her right now. Hello kaijou, this suitcase is so heavy, with everything you eat you should have enough strength to lift ten of these. Hello Sakura, did you have fun, I made your favorite dessert. Sakura, I'll edit the tapes from the trip tonight and then you can come over tomorrow after school and watch them with me. She smiled automatically to everyone, trying her best to look normal so that no one would ask. She succeeded, except for one person.
"You okay?" Syaoran leaned close to her and whispered, careful to stay out of Touya's line of sight.
"M-me? O-of course, why do you ask?" she faked a smile at him.
"You don't look okay...to me. If anything happened...please...call me" he blushed.
"I-I will..." she replied quietly "Syaoran?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you"
He gave her one of his rare smiles and walked away.
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