Chapter 4: Battle Ready—FIGHT!!!
"Hey!!!! I recognize you!!!" Sailor Venus yelled pointing her finger in Duo's direction. "You're the new student: Duo Maxwell!"
Duo halted in his boots and feigned shock, "Oh my gosh!!! How'd she guess? Mina knows MY identity!"
Mina--- er Sailor Venus choked, "You know—I mean why would you think I'm Mina, from Crossroads High?!?"
Everyone in the future melee froze in their tracks at the revelation. The Gundam pilots did so more in response to the Sailor Scouts idea of disguise. Heero was the first to speak out:
"You just exposed the fact that you are Mina from Crossroads High." He hissed in annoyance.
"It's not like any of you are in a REAL disguise. You are the same girls from school…. Lita." Trowa added calmly.
Jupiter let out a yelp. Then she started blushing, "He knows who I am! He probably led me here! AWWWWWW! Freddy still loves me!"
"Who is Freddy?"
Sailor Moon came in with authority, "Listen, guys…. And girl… I don't know who you are, but you hurt some innocent police officers. Though we appreciate your infiltrating the factory hideout. But I'm afraid the winning streak ends here. You guys and girl are gonna be Moon Dusted!"
Quatre blinked and looked around, "Who's she calling a girl?!! Duo?!"
Trowa rolled his eye. Wufei huffed and started babbling something about 'blonde onnas'. Heero sighed and looked away—He didn't want to know him. Duo pointed and laughed at Quatre.
"What?!" Quatre responded looking around suspiciously.
Sailor Mercury huffed, "You should be ashamed. That's not very lady-like to go assaulting innocent cops. You're obviously not Sailor Scout material."
Duo bust out laughing again, "Sailor Quatre!!! Bwhahahahhahahahahaha!!!"
Sailor Mars insulted, "They are not even worthy opponent material! Let's just smoke'em!!!"
Wufei intervened with an arrogant tone, "Well if it isn't that onna, Raye! You're far too weak to confront me! Stupid, stupid girl!"
Raye snapped, "Oh yeah! Well, I-I hate your stupid, silky, raven hair!"
"….?!?" EVERYONE gawked at Raye, who blushed. Love Jones was taking its toll on the Sailor Scout of Fire's brain….
"I mean…. I hate your UGLY ponytail!!! You HUGE forehead-freak!!!"
"Daaaaaaaamn!" Duo laughed out loud. "That HAD to hurt!"
Heero and Trowa started to shake from their struggle to hide their laughter, as Quatre covered his mouth, poorly blocking the laughter. Wufei trembled with anger…
"You bitch! I'll make you SUFFER!!!!!!" he yelled as he went hauling towards her ninja-style, full speed.
"That's gonna be my line!!!! DIIIIIIIIIE!!!!" Raye followed suit and went for Wufei.
"So it begins…" Trowa uttered just before rocketing two helmets into Sailor Mercury and Sailor Jupiter's face.
"Hey! That was MY helmet!!!" Quatre yelled at Trowa who just… stared at him.
"It was fun…. Pure fun…" he replied as if stoned.
"I call the priss!" Duo joked as he launched his helmet smack dab into Sailor Venus' inattentive face.
"Goooooofah!!!" Sailor V grunted as she went flying past Sailor Moon.
"Oh my!" Sailor Moon gasped. She glared at Duo and took out her wand, "You're going down, you hippie-boy--- GAK!!!"
A helmet went flying into the Moon Princess' back and sent her face first into the ground. Heero was much amused.
He instantly ordered Duo to 'tend' to Sailor Venus as he stalked over to Sailor Moon. "You're gonna have to do better than that, Usagi."
After spitting the dirt and grass out of her mouth, Sailor Moon sat up and looked up at Heero who had his trusty gun pointed right between the eyes. She tried to scamper away, but Heero smoothly stepped closer.
"H-How did you know my name?!" she stuttered. "…Heero Yuy?!?!"
Heero rolled his eyes. This is so stupid. THEY ARE NOT INCOGNITO! THEY'RE JUST wearing silly dresses, pleasantly short---- BUT STUPID dresses!!!! THEY'RE NOT EVEN WEARING MASKS!!!! He shouted in his mind.
"You can wear all the tacky, skanky outfits you want--- NO one on this Earth, or in the colonies, would dare wear their hair as stupid as YOU do!"
"Hey!!! You can't talk about Pretty Soldier Sailor Moon like that!!!! That's MY job!!!" a squeaky voice came crashing through the Perfect Soldier's ear.
Heero turned around only to see Rini—aka Sailor Mini Moon standing behind him ready to attack with her pink, sparkly wand. He noticed the hair and grumbled, "I stand corrected…. ACK!!!"
The Perfect Soldier left Sailor Moon open to the perfect counter. A swift kick in the sack sent Heero rolling to the ground in agony…. For like a second.
Heero instantly returned the assault with a low sweep to Mini Moon and a solid low kick to Sailor Moon's forehead. He then made for his discarded helmet (uh-oh) and socked her dead in the face with it.
Sailor Mini Moon recovered and used her Sugar Attack against Heero… which only seemed to piss him off. Heero stood up and football kicked her across the ground.
Sailor Moon attacked Heero from behind and fwapped him in the back of the head with her wand…. This also pissed the Perfect Soldier. He retaliated with a knee to the gut. As the Moon Princess keeled over, Heero palm smacked her into the air.
"AA-A-A-A-A-A-A-AAA-AAA-AYAH!!!" she screamed before crashing into the ground.
"…I hate Princesses…" he uttered in annoyance.
~~~~~~~~~~
Quatre suddenly realized the dangers of fighting with females (with or without rapiers)…. Especially if one thinks you ARE a female…
Sailor Jupiter summoned her Oak Evolution and attacked Pilot 04 to no end. She sent every Thunder Smash whirling his way. Lightning thrashed and clashed all around Quatre. However, he miraculously dodge, ducked, and jumped out of harm's way.
"Why is she chasing me!?!?" Quatre yelled missing another bolt of lightning.
The tall Sailor Scout pursued her victim with a vengeance, "You HUSSY!!! HOOCHIE!!! HARLOT!!!! BLONDE TRASH!!!! I'll show you what happens to bimbos who take my Freddy!!!"
"I…. Am….NOT…. a girl!!!!" the Sandrock pilot shouted for dear life. "Who the HELL'S Freddy!?"
~~~~~~
Trowa found himself engulfed in a wall of…. Bubbles?!?!
"?!?" The HeavyArms pilot shouted in stupor. He couldn't see squat. He could, however hear his fellow, blonde pilot screaming, shouting, and running like the Dickens…. (?!?!)
Meanwhile, Sailor Mercury's strategy was working as planned. She's the fastest of the 5 Inner Scouts. She would dash, whir, and dizzy the tall pilot. Then she would freeze him solid with her Deep Freeze Attack!!!!
It's SO perfect. Now for the finale----
But before Sailor Mercury could dart past Trowa for the final time, he caught her by the face and held her up, lifting her WAY off the ground.
"MMMrph?!?" she sounded.
"…..Peek-A-Boo…." Trowa jested before launching her into the air.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYhhhhhhh!!!!!!"
~~~~~~~
Sailor Jupiter finally decided that the blonde skank was just too, worthless to cast her great powers upon…. So she decided to kill her with her bare hands. She made a mad dash for Quatre and caught him in a tackle.
"You're gonna pay for breaking me and Freddy up!!!!" She growled yanking his head back by his hair. "In your face, Blondie----OOOOOOphAAA!!!!"
The rear of the Blue-Haired Sailor Scout landed right on target: Sailor Jupiter.
How Trowa knew the locale of Jupiter, the schematics to throw where and how---- WHO KNOWS. He's freaky like that.
Quatre crawled out from under the two Sailor Scouts by the help of Trowa who just shoved them aside with his foot. He was much thankful for the save, for he was running out of places to run, with chaos ensuing everywhere else…
"Thanks, Friend Trowa!!!" he cheered in his usual happy tone.
"…."
Quatre glanced over towards Wufei who was in brutal combat with Sailor Mars. "Oh no! Looks like trouble! We should help---"
"…." Trowa disagreed stepping in front of Quatre.
"…..but—"
"…..!!!" he yelled with a stern voice. "….." he added with a cool tone.
"Okay…."
~~~~~~~~~~
Wufei dodged yet another fireball attack by Sailor Mars. He countered with a nasty mid kick to the gut sending her to the ground. Pilot 05 tried to land upon her face with a heel, but Sailor Mars rolled to the side and swept him. Wufei landed with a thud, but he instantly flipped to his feet.
Sailor Mars did the same. She charged him and sucker punched the Wu-Man across the face! Wufei was sent to the ground--- head first. Before Sailor Mars could add to the attack, he pulled his body up and back-kicked her in the tummy knocking her back a few feet.
Wufei spun around in a flip and blocked a roundhouse to the kidney from Sailor Mars. Wufei Chang decided to counter and went for the spear----- GOLDBERG!!!!!!!!
He rammed into her chest head and shoulder first, knocking Sailor Mars WAY back….
However, this attack was expected.
Sailor Mars AMAZINGLY kept on her feet, clutching Wufei's sides for support. Soon she had his head and shoulder under her chest. After that she used all her Sailor strength to spin him around and pile drived him into the ground….
Booyah!
~~~~~~~
"Oh Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn!" Trowa and Quatre exclaimed, watching in amazement.
~~~~~
"BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
Even though Duo was hot and heavy…. In a fight….. He still had time to get his laugh on at the cost of anybody!
"Venus Love Chain Attack!!!!" Mina shouted as she lashed the impervious chain of golden hearts around Duo's waist and slung him into Heero… who was pistol-whipping Usagi to no end!
"Hn…." Heero grunted, he aimed and shot Sailor Venus in the knee cap. "….twit…"
Duo scurried out of Heero's way as he went back to finishing Sailor Moon.
~~~~~~~~
"Moon Tiara Attack!!!!" Sailor Moon called out as she sent her head ornament soaring. The projectile sliced into Heero's knee, he staggered. "Bingo!!!"
"Grrrrrrr...You die now..." Heero sounded coldly. He snatched the tiara out of his thigh and tossed it aside, without even looking at it, and went after Sailor Moon. "Omae O Kuroso!"
Duo covered his eyes from a short distance in fret, " Oh gawd…. This isn't gonna be pretty…."
Heero pulled out ANOTHER handgun from nowhere and smacked her to the ground. He took aim….
"Dude….you pulled that from where?" Duo questioned scratching his head.
"Damned if I know…." He responded. He didn't have a clue either. He cocked the gun-------
Suddenly a rose a single red rose went slashing against his hand, knocking the gun out of grip. Then another rose speared right into Heero's chest. Heero stumbled back a little before catching a glimpse of the attacker.
"Hn?"
Heero was suddenly tackled to the ground by Sailor Moon and Mini Moon. Mini Moon finally returned from where Heero had kicked her. (Yay)
Duo freaked out, "Holy shit! A rose!!! Jeez! Heero are you okay?"
"No problem…" Heero instantly tossed both Sailor Scouts off. Then he yanked the rose stem out of his chest…. "That stung a bit. It still had thorns."
Duo was feeling nauseous, "Oh….my….gawd… T-That thing was lodged in your heart---- URP!!!" He ran some distance away.
As the God of Death turned in to the Lord of Vomit, Sailor Moon and Mini Moon called out to their rescuer.
"Oh Tuxedo Mask you've returned!!! We need your help!!!"
"Hn?!?!"
"W-who's THAT loser?" Duo snubbed as he regained composure and cool points.