What About Me
This is a Kenyako with a little Kouyako, though I wouldn't advise Kouyako lovers to read this. I have nothing personal against Koushiro actually I really like him, but I also like to think that their is an underlying rivalry between him and Ken. So on with the story..
Disclaimer..Digimon I don't own it but this is not for profit so I should be ok.
Jyou- college
Yamato, Taichi, Sora- seniors
Mimi, Koushiro- Juniors
Miyako, Ken, Daisuke, Takeru and Hikari- freshmen
Iore- 7th grade
Chapter 1
*****
I am not sure when I actually fell in love with her, I just know that when I did I fell hard. Now she is all I can think of and dream about. Like now here I am currently in my World history class but all I can think about is that lunch is next and I would be seeing her soon. I have known for years that I have loved her and I can't believe I have been able to keep this secret to myself. Maybe it was the first time I saw her as the Kaiser or maybe it was the first time she sent me that email. Either way I am scared of her finding out. I don't think I could handle the rejection. I look at my note taking as the teacher drones on and suppress the urge to chuckle. I have not written a single note on the entire page, I have just is covered it with doodles of her. Well at least I am awake, I already learned this material 5 years ago and I could teach better than this idiot.
I used to go to a "special" school for "gifted" students. I am a genius after all but after the whole Kaiser incident I decided that I didn't want to be special anymore. Sure if I wanted it I could still over achieve in my studies and be at the top of my class, but that would mean less time for the things that I actually enjoy doing. I decided a while ago that I wanted to be a kid instead of a prodigy. People have the wrong assumption on how dark spore made you smarter and better at sports. It wasn't some kind of "magic trick" or dark power, in truth it controlled you. Your whole purpose in life was to be the best at everything, you became obsessed with winning no matter what you did while it consumed every ounce of your life. There was no time to slow down or be a kid, soccer all of a sudden became a war instead of a sport. Why would you want to go out and play when the only way to be at the top of the class was to focus all your time and energy into being number-one? I had enough of that for too long the only thing I strive for now is normalcy. So I begged, pleaded and yes guilt tripped my parents to letting me attend Odaiba High school starting my freshman year.
Ring
Great!! Class is over!! Lunchtime!!
I quickly go to my locker, deposit my books and grab my lunch. As I hurry to lunch I couldn't help but notice that I draw glances from some of my female classmates. This is my first year hear at Odaiba and I wasn't expecting for people to take such notice of me. In my old school my reputation was of my old self therefore a good many of my classmates still remained nervous around me. Not here though, Daisuke tells me that I am a big hit with the girls. He sometimes exaggerates so I can only take that information with a grain of salt.
The lunchroom is crowded and noisy as usual. If it wasn't for my friends that I would probably avoid the chaos as much as possible. I can see some of the kids glance at me always hoping that I would for once sit with them. I can see some of the girls sigh when I smile and shake my head politely. One girl in particular always tries very hard to grab my attention. Her name is Anita and I try to avoid her at all cost. She is the type of person that you love to hate, beautiful, rich, smart, conceited, conniving and an A #1 bitch. She smiles at me trying to grab my attention but I quickly glance away and find my friends. As I race over to them I notice her smile turn to a frown.
Like Anita a majority of the school couldn't figure out why we were friends. Takeru, Hikari and I are considered "cool", whatever that means. Daisuke is mostly considered a "Jock" sure he is. Miyako though was considered an "outcast" or a "nerd". That really bothered me in my book she was everything but those names. I have only been in this school for two weeks and I see how the rest of the students treat her.... treat my Miyako. I don't see how and why the others put up with it, I have had Dais and Taichi stop me from getting into a few fights because of it.
" Oh Ken hi!!" Hikari said looking up from her fruit salad as sit down between Dais and Takeru.
"Hello everyone " I say.
"So how is everyone's day going so far?" Daisuke asks. This is just the everyday conversation that we have.
"Good" said Hikari.
"Fine", that was Takeru.
"Boring" which is my usual answer.
"Great!" beams Miyako, which was certainly not like her.
" Oh really?" I ask, "and just what makes this particular day so great?"
" Oh nothing really" she says with a glint in her eyes.
" OK Girl spill it" Hikari joins in.
"It's just one of those days Kari" Miyako winks.
"You have a date don't you!!" Takeru grins ear-to-ear "fess up".
A date! I dropped my head and prayed and prayed that she would deny...
"How did you guess" she squealed!
Crap...
"Because I know who it is"
"But how..."
"Oh come on Miyako he has only had a crush on you since the day you became one of us maybe even before. You should hear him sometimes drone on and on about you should I ask her out or should I not blah blah blah". Takeru says to a very red Miyako now.
One of us?? That must mean that it must a destined but who?? No one here ...no wait it couldn't be him ..it must not be him.
"Really??" Miyako asked still blushing.
"This is all and great but who is it" Daisuke finally speaks up. He had been quiet up till then, which is very unusual for him. Normally he would have loved to have the chance to take to pick on Miya about this but instead he had been staring at me through the whole thing watching me. I wonder if he picked up on how I felt about her...I had wondered how I had kept something like this from my jogress partner maybe I didn't. But if he knew why didn't he say anything to me. But he also maybe is waiting to see what I think of the entire situation too.
"Koushiro!" Takeru and Miyako both said at the same time "Jinx" yelled TK.
I felt like I was going to faint. I should have known Koushiro would ask her out. The signs were all there, the way he always would hang around her. But why did she say yes especially to him. Don't get me wrong I don't hate him or anything but there was always this feeling of rivalry coming from him towards me. It may have been the whole Kaiser thing but most of the kids have gotten over that, actually I think I am the one that dwells on that the most now. I always get the feeling that I am stepping on his feet. He liked to think that he was the "brains" of the group and didn't like the idea of me encroaching on his territory. Every time I came up with a theory I would have to defend it like I was defending a thesis in college and usually saying "well that could work but let's try this instead". Could work my ass and now he had to go and ask Miyako out.
I bit into my apple slowly and found that my eyes were feeling a little tight and itchy.
"What's wrong ken? You haven't said but maybe two words this entire lunch period" Daisuke looked at me with concern and maybe knowing.
" I just don't think I slept very well last night and I hate my History teacher if it's not in her text book then it never happened" I grumbled.
"I'm sorry maybe we should have you write her a new one and exchange it behind her back so then she will have all the facts" My angel said halfway joking but halfway serious too. She never lost faith in me or my genius. She understood what I was going through and I usually found myself pouring out all my problems to her. She would never ridicule when I tell her how much I don't want the life of this genius anymore...she always supported me. I think that's one of the main reasons why I love her so much.
I felt myself blush then almost start crying again.
"Listen guys I need to go I forgot I had to do something" I say,
"Yeah I better go to I forgot to help you do something that you forgot" Daisuke adds.
"Yeah ok catch you guys later" Takeru looks at us very strangely while Hikari and Miyako are giving us looks like we were going to rob a bank or something. I just nod to them quickly and head out at a fast walk with Daisuke beside me.
"That was the worst lie I have ever heard," I whisper to him on the way out.
"Dude! I thought it was ingenious and totally unable to be proven otherwise," Daisuke says proudly
I couldn't help but chuckle at my best friend as I head outside.
"Dude where are we going?"
" Dude I am going to get some fresh air, I don't know where you are going" the statement was meant as a subtle dismissal that of course went totally over Daisuke's head.
He just followed me over to the tree I was heading to and plopped down beside me when I sat down. I picked up a piece of grass and started playing with it while we sat in silence for a while.
Daisuke finally broke the silence.
"Why don't you tell her how you feel and quit playing with that piece of grass your going to get a cut".
"What!" I jerked my head around to look at him I know that my face by then was totally drained of color and I probably looked like death warmed over.
"Your the genius ken some blades of grass are..."
"That's not what I was questioning"
"I know hehe," he laughed " seriously though you are crazy about her and you are totally blowing any chance you have with her. "
" Again what are you talking about Daisuke and I swear if you start talking about grass I will..."
" Oh don't go all Kaiser on me Ken Ichijouji I am talking about Miyako and you full well know it. I might not be the brightest light bulb in the box but I am your jogress partner and you can't hide that kind of emotion from me."
Daisuke went silent and I just dropped my head, what else could I say. I felt something wet hit my hand, and then another is it raining? I look up and then I feel it on my cheek. Oh great!! I am crying now.
"This is tearing you up inside, come on don't get into the same situation I am, you're too good of a guy for that. I know I have no chance with Hikari but I love her still the same. The thing is Ken you have a chance with Miya." Daisuke said while digging through his backpack for a tissue for me.
"It's not that simple Dais, I don't think she feels for me the same way and don't forget about Koushiro" saying his name in a growl as I accepted the tissue.
"How do you know? Why don't you go right now and....."
"And what confess my undying love to her and that I have loved her so long that I die a little each time she looks at me and all of that."
"Well no actually I was just going to say ask her out on a date, but that would work too. Seriously though Koushiro and her aren't an "item" yet and it's only one date."
Ring
The bell rang signaling lunch is over.
I rubbed my aching head and sighed to Daisuke " Just drop it Dais and swear to me that you will not say anything to anyone"
"But Ken" Daisuke whined.
"Dais swear it to me" I know I was starting to go all neurotic again but I couldn't help it. I guess because I had no friends as a child that now I am friends with the destine that I am so scared of loosing one of them. I am so scared of being lonely like before and this is the main reason why I can't even dare risk loosing Miyako by confessing my feelings.
" I think you making a mistake but I swear it."
****
Classes are finally over and I get to go to soccer practice. As soon as Dais found out that I would be coming to this school he convinced me (or nagged same thing to him) that I had to try out. Of course I made the team, the one thing that I had learned was that I actually played very well when I was just having fun and soccer is just one of my passions.
On the way to the field I saw something that almost made me turn around and run right then and there. It was Miyako and Koushiro walking together across the field engrossed in a very quiet conversation. I actually had to swallow hard as not to vomit. I immediately made up my mind that I would try to take the long way around as not to torture myself anymore than I had to.
"KEN!!!"
Luck was just against me today. I looked up and saw Daisuke running towards me and also didn't have to look over to know that his scream had notified the couple of my presence and they were heading my way. Miyako and Koushiro reached me first as they were actually closer, when I looked up I saw a very happy Miyako and a very peeved looking Koushiro.
"Ken hey you going to practice now?" My angel said with smile plastered on her face.
"Yeah, that's the one thing about being on sports team you have to practice" I said with a slight smile.
"Even the rocket has to practice huh??" she giggled
I just rolled my eyes.
"Hey Ken your early good! You know how Taichi hates it when anyone is late" Daisuke said as he finally caught up to us. Taichi is now captain of the school's soccer team and I always feel a little nervous around him still.
"Hypocrite," Miyako laughed, " Since when is Ken known to be late. The only reason Taichi gets so peeved at you is because you're always late!"
This actually got me to laugh a little since I knew very well that she was right.
"Ahem!"
"Oh sorry Kou I know that we have to get going."
"Well it's not that I don't find the topic of sports and tardiness invigorating it's just that we do have to get to the computer room without delay so we can set up for the club" Koushiro is the president of the computer club and Miyako is vice president. It is almost unheard of that a junior hold that status and still surprising that a freshman is in office too. Miya had tried to convince me to join but between Soccer and my other studies it would be just too much. Actually the thought of being in the room with Koushiro running the show that long was also not to my liking. So I thought the best way to avoid a bad situation was just not to join.
" Oh yes of course sorry Kou," then she turns and looks at me "it's still a shame that you couldn't join the computer club this year we would have had a blast"
"Yes a shame" said Koushiro...Did he just smirk at me??? Why the little ugh control yourself Kenny boy.
"Well soccer is my number one passion, I like computers don't get me wrong but I don't want to stretch myself to thin again."
" We wouldn't want that happening, come on Miyako-chan let's hurry bye Ken later Dais"
" Uh yeah catch you both later" Miyako flitted away with Koushiro following.
Chan?? Chan!!! Did he just call my Miyako chan? Not only was he smirking he was gloating. Like he knew I had a thing for her and he was rubbing my face in it. Well I tell you what little Mr. computer whiz you don't want to cross...what the hell am I thinking, Koushiro may be a little competition for me but I am starting to think way to many bad thoughts for my liking. Besides I am not a very spiritual man but the one thing I do believe in is Karma and believe me one day .........
"Ken...yoo-hoo kennnnn!!!!"
Why is something brown flashing in front of my eyes? Oh yeah Dais he he.... boy Kenny your loosing it.
"Huh?"
"Earth to ken"
"Davis get your hand out of my face please"
"Well I have only been waving it in front of your face for the last two minutes"
"Oh"
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No"
"You sure"
"Uh...no I mean yeah I mean I dunno"
"Hey tomorrow is Friday and why don't you plan to spend the night over and we can talk or just play video games or something"
Friday.yeah Miya has her date of Friday doesn't she. Well maybe having someone with me will be a good idea. (A/N no this is not heading towards a Kensuke)
"Grrreeeeaaat!!" Daisuke said sounding a lot like that cartoon tiger.
I couldn't help but laugh I have got to have the weirdest and greatest friend of all times.
" I am looking forward to it but we better hurry because if were late Taichi is going to skin us alive" I said still giggling.
All of a sudden Daisuke looked very serious, " oh no Taichi!"
" Come on if we hurry will get there on time"
"Race ya" Dais said with an evil grin " and this time I will certainly win"
"As if " I said and took off like a bolt...they didn't call me the rocket for nothing.
How did the race go well even though I won we didn't beat the clock. Taichi decided that for a punishment Dais would have to do 20 laps around the field after practice and that I would have to count them. When Daisuke started to complain Taichi just gave him one of his looks and explained that since this is my first time being late then he was going to cut me some slack. Personally I think Taichi just gets a kick out of watching Daisuke squirm a little. I also think that Taichi sees the same talent in Dais that I do and if he would just take himself seriously then he would be an incredible player instead of the mediocre one now.
****
The next day I was starting to feel a little bit better about myself. Maybe Dais was right, maybe I should confess all to her especially before her date tonight. I made up my mind, come on Ken if you can stand up to Malomyotismon then you can tell a girl how you feel.
Again I sat in history class and listened to this lovely person recite from a textbook I began to think of ways on how I was going to tell her. Once I made up mind I set my jaw in determination and started to relax. Right after lunch all or nothing.
When I walked into lunch I almost turned around and ran out. Sitting with the others was non other than Koushiro. What is he doing here? I thought he had 2nd lunch with the older destines. Daisuke saw me come in and looked at me as if to say sorry what could I do. Well there goes all thoughts of confession; there is no way I could confess now. Not with him here I should just go somewhere else. Wait what am I think these are my friends too and soon I became determined on something else. I was not about to let him drive me away from my own lunch table. So I walked over and sat in my usual spot in between Dais and Takeru.
" Hey guys," I say giving my best grin (which in all honestly comes out as only half a smile, but hey for me that's good.) "Koushiro hi, I thought you had second lunch how did you manage the switch?" When I was the Kaiser I wasn't known for beating around the bush so I didn't."
" Hey Ken, I used to only have a study period before lunch so it didn't really matter when I took it so I moved my study period to after lunch so I can starting coming to lunch with you guys."
"That's cool" Takeru said oblivious as usual to what was happening.
" I thought it was sweet," Miyako said batting those lovely eyelids at him.
I could feel myself wanting to run at the moment. No stay, Ken don't let him run you away from your friends.
" Oh Ken you still coming over tonight"
Thank you Daisuke something else to think about.
"But of course"
As Dais and I started to plan out our evening the next question really caught my attention.
"So you two, where exactly are you going tonight?" Kari asked winking at Miyako.
"I don't know", answered Miyako honestly "Kou is surprising me..."
Miya couldn't finish her answer as Anita and her group walked up to our table.
" Hey Kari Takeru Ken" Saying my name with a wink to me. I took note that she totally ignored the others sitting at out table. How dare she treat Dais and Miya that way?
" Hey Anita" TK said giving her a glare. I was just praying someone would drop a house on her.
" I will never understand why you guys sit here." Then she turned as if seeing the other three for the first time sitting there. She gave one of her friends a small side-glance and I was getting a nervous feeling about this. So," she said sitting next to Miya " I heard that you actually have a date. I think that is wonderful that someone of your social stature is trying to act normal."
I could feel myself getting extremely angry at this blonde hair freak how dare she talk down to Miya.
" Yes as a matter of fact I do though I don't see why you would waste your time on something that doesn't concern you" Miyako said defiantly...Go Miya
"Yes she is going out with me" Koushiro spoke up.
" You??? Ooohh how sweet nerds in love. Ok hehe that makes sense, well what does your kind do on a date? " She asked with a glint of amusement.
Before she could answer I couldn't take it anymore.
"What do you mean their kind?" I say in a very low soft voice.
"Ken!" she gasped. She turned to one of her friends who were nodding excitedly seeming to forget her question. Though obviously a few hadn't as they kept snickering and staring at the couple. Miya looked like she was about ready to cry and Koushiro looked lost. He had always had Taichi and Yamato to back him up. Well I might not like the guy a whole lot right now but he is one of us and I wasn't about to let anyone be mistreated by this witch.
" You didn't answer my question Anita. What do you mean their kind?"
" Ken your actually talking to me" she seemed thrilled and I felt sick.
Takeru looked like he wanted to hit someone and Hikari was trying to calm him and Daisuke down.
"You have not answered my question and I will not ask it again." This was a cold statement not a request this time. I also saw other destine turn around and stare at me I guess I am sounding a little to Kaiserish for their liking. Well I am pissed damn it and I don't care.
Anita at least lost that fan girl look to her." you know what I mean Ken. The two brain nerds are not like you and I. I mean how much fun can they have besides messing around with some computer or whatever they do in their spare time? I mean it's not like they have a real life or anything."
I laughed, not one of those rare endearing laughs that Dais and Miyako can usually draw out of me but that hard cold cruel laugh. All they see in this school is Ken the soccer star, Ken this kind of cool guy that has some how has gotten in good with the ladies, the guy that used to be on TV all the time. They have forgotten exactly why I was on TV and where I came from..
"Actually Anita I AM just like them and what's wrong with messing around was some old computer. What do you think I do on the weekends when there isn't a soccer game going on go to parties and shit like that."
I was now standing up and leaning over the table glaring at her. The others are staring at me now I think I am scaring them oh well I will have to make it up to them later.
"What do you mean Ken?" Anita was starting to get very uncomfortable under my gaze.
" Oh come on Anita I don't go to any of your parties or any of your friends and you know why?"
"Why?" she asked in a small voice.
"Because I can't stand you and your kind." Throwing her words back at her. "Have you forgotten exactly who I am and where I came from? How do you think I won all those COMPUTER awards in the first place huh?? Come on even someone with your obvious lack of brain space can figure that one out. The only reason that I don't belong in their little computer club is that I am too busy with soccer as it is. The reason I left the Tamachi School for the gifted" emphasizing the word gifted, " was so I could be with my friends here in Odaiba and if I am not hanging with my friends which includes EVERYONE at this table, then usually I am at home coming up with a new program that I will not even bother trying to explain to you."
I was gasping for breath red as a beet and probably ruined my entire popularity thing I had going but I actually felt better.
The whole lunchroom had gotten silent I had gotten a little bit loud by the end.
Anita just looked stunned...."ok then... well ...uhh...yeah anyway come on guys let me show you this new dress I am going to buy I have the catalogue at my locker" Anita and her "group" fled as quietly away as possible the lunch room started to get noisy again as it was obvious the excitement was over. That is except for our table.
I think I stunned everyone, I know I lost my temper but god damnit I am not going to allow someone to speak to any of my friends that way especially Miyako. I don't think they know what to say right now.
That was until " Dude if you had brought out that whip I was going to run as fast as possible"
I just looked at Daisuke and raised an eyebrow while Miyako and Takeru became red while trying to stop their laughter. Hikari was just shaking her head and Koushiro was staring at me. Then I started laughing myself as I realized that Dais was completely serious so I decided to poke a little fun too. "Nah you wouldn't have to worry about the whip.... but the sunglasses yeah the sunglasses those you should be scared of"
At that both TK and Miyako let loose holding their sides and Hikari had her head down in her arms laughing. As soon as Dais realized I was joking he just grinned ear-to-ear chuckling and again Koushiro just stared at me. I didn't care at that moment I just really didn't care.
Word got around quick and Taichi and Yamato came up to me in the hall and asked me if I could help them by being their body guard since I had the entire school scared around me. This was all in fun of course and I told them they wouldn't be able to afford me now that I was in such demand. Yamato joked around and asked me as a favor to a fellow digi-destine if I could get rid of Daisuke's sister Jun for him she was driving him bonkers He was kidding of course, well I think he was anyway. They just laughed and Yamato thought about giving me a noogie but my death stare made him think different. I told him if he really felt the need to noogie someone right then and there Dais should be going to Math and that he would be more than happily oblige him.
I turned around to head towards my advanced chemistry class when I notice Sora and Miyako talking down the hall away. They seemed to be in a deep conversation and I thought about going down to say a quick hi when I saw Koushiro come up to them and place his arm possessively around Miyako's waist the whole time watching me. I thought I had caused enough of a seen today and as much as I wanted to speak to Miyako before the weekend started I just turned to go to my class. It was probably better like this anyway.
*****
After school I was standing outside waiting on Daisuke praying that he didn't get detention or anything when Miyako came running up to me. I was about to ask her where Koushiro was since he was not with her when she threw her arms around me. I didn't know what to do when she buried her head into my neck and I could feel her hair against my face. The beautiful lilac hair that I have grown to love and adore smelled so sweet I don't think I have ever been as happy as that moment.
"Thank you" she whispered from my neck.... I couldn't resist but wrap my arms around her also. He waist was so slender that I was afraid I was going to break her.
"For what?" I whisper from her hair I could feel a heat going through me this closeness was starting to affect me.
" For today" she was so close and gave me kiss on the cheek. I thought I was in heaven then she pulled away and looked up into my eyes, "and being my friend"
Now is your time Kenny boy do it...
"Uh Miya, uh...." she looked deep into my eyes waiting for what I was about to say.
"MIYAKO" oh shit no I looked up and saw non other than Koushiro himself smugly walking up. " Are you ready?"
"Huh Kou oh yeah sure" she turned back to look at me for me to finish what I was going to say.
"What were you going to say Ken?" she asked.
Come on Ken think fast, "on nothing more than your welcome". Boy was that lame, obviously she thought so too.
"Well ok " she said slowly" then she turned to Koushiro. " I forgot my jacket be right back."
"Ok I will meet you at the car ok"
"Sure OK, and Ken you and Dais behave yourselves" she gave me a quick wink and went racing back into the school.
I was lost in thought to myself about how dumb I was when I heard Koushiro speaking to me.
"You really think you had a chance with her?"
"Huh? What are you talking about Izumi? " I growled at him.
"You know what I am talking about, just face it Ken you're a wannabe. The real genius of the group is me not you. I have known Miyako longer than you and you never stood a chance. Not considering how close we were. I still have the towel she brought back from her Kyoto trip in the 7th grade hanging up in my room. She knows what it meant to me. Did she bring you back anything?"
"That's an unfair question and you know it Koushiro things were different then. I wouldn't count one gift that she got you 3 years ago such a special thing" I was arguing for my sanity but his words held so much sting in them. He was right she always did favor him over me, I never stood a chance. This was the reason why I never confessed my feelings to her.
"You better go she will be waiting for you" was all I could mutter.
He didn't say a word started to walk away with just glance over his shoulder once at me and this time I knew for sure that he was telling me to get lost that this was his girl, he won and I lost.
God I hope Dais' is more fun tonight than this I have never been so happy and complete one minute and so lonely and miserable the next.
I was busy staring at the retreating form of Koushiro going over his words again and again that I was startled a bit when a hand was laid on my shoulder.
"Ready Kais... I mean ken?" I turned around to see Daisuke standing there giggling.
"You know only two people would ever be able to get away with that joke" Giving him a mock stare.
"Well I guess I am lucky then aren't I " He said with bravado.
"Are you sure that your one of them" He just looks at me " I will give you a 10 sec head start " I said just as evilly. He took off like a flash to his apt and I followed by him. The race was something I needed, I had to get the anger out someway and to run it out was better than beating the shit out of a little red head. I was so lost in thought that I didn't realize that I had passed Dais along while ago and at his apartment way before him. As I leaned on the door waiting for him I just couldn't get Koushiro's conversation out of my head, when I finally heard the pounding of footsteps I turned to see Davis flying up the stairwell.
"Geez Ken!" He gasped for air "Now even I see why they call you the rocket"
I groaned good ol' Daisuke I hoped he could put up with me because something told me that this would be a long night tonight.
TBC
This is a Kenyako with a little Kouyako, though I wouldn't advise Kouyako lovers to read this. I have nothing personal against Koushiro actually I really like him, but I also like to think that their is an underlying rivalry between him and Ken. So on with the story..
Disclaimer..Digimon I don't own it but this is not for profit so I should be ok.
Jyou- college
Yamato, Taichi, Sora- seniors
Mimi, Koushiro- Juniors
Miyako, Ken, Daisuke, Takeru and Hikari- freshmen
Iore- 7th grade
Chapter 1
*****
I am not sure when I actually fell in love with her, I just know that when I did I fell hard. Now she is all I can think of and dream about. Like now here I am currently in my World history class but all I can think about is that lunch is next and I would be seeing her soon. I have known for years that I have loved her and I can't believe I have been able to keep this secret to myself. Maybe it was the first time I saw her as the Kaiser or maybe it was the first time she sent me that email. Either way I am scared of her finding out. I don't think I could handle the rejection. I look at my note taking as the teacher drones on and suppress the urge to chuckle. I have not written a single note on the entire page, I have just is covered it with doodles of her. Well at least I am awake, I already learned this material 5 years ago and I could teach better than this idiot.
I used to go to a "special" school for "gifted" students. I am a genius after all but after the whole Kaiser incident I decided that I didn't want to be special anymore. Sure if I wanted it I could still over achieve in my studies and be at the top of my class, but that would mean less time for the things that I actually enjoy doing. I decided a while ago that I wanted to be a kid instead of a prodigy. People have the wrong assumption on how dark spore made you smarter and better at sports. It wasn't some kind of "magic trick" or dark power, in truth it controlled you. Your whole purpose in life was to be the best at everything, you became obsessed with winning no matter what you did while it consumed every ounce of your life. There was no time to slow down or be a kid, soccer all of a sudden became a war instead of a sport. Why would you want to go out and play when the only way to be at the top of the class was to focus all your time and energy into being number-one? I had enough of that for too long the only thing I strive for now is normalcy. So I begged, pleaded and yes guilt tripped my parents to letting me attend Odaiba High school starting my freshman year.
Ring
Great!! Class is over!! Lunchtime!!
I quickly go to my locker, deposit my books and grab my lunch. As I hurry to lunch I couldn't help but notice that I draw glances from some of my female classmates. This is my first year hear at Odaiba and I wasn't expecting for people to take such notice of me. In my old school my reputation was of my old self therefore a good many of my classmates still remained nervous around me. Not here though, Daisuke tells me that I am a big hit with the girls. He sometimes exaggerates so I can only take that information with a grain of salt.
The lunchroom is crowded and noisy as usual. If it wasn't for my friends that I would probably avoid the chaos as much as possible. I can see some of the kids glance at me always hoping that I would for once sit with them. I can see some of the girls sigh when I smile and shake my head politely. One girl in particular always tries very hard to grab my attention. Her name is Anita and I try to avoid her at all cost. She is the type of person that you love to hate, beautiful, rich, smart, conceited, conniving and an A #1 bitch. She smiles at me trying to grab my attention but I quickly glance away and find my friends. As I race over to them I notice her smile turn to a frown.
Like Anita a majority of the school couldn't figure out why we were friends. Takeru, Hikari and I are considered "cool", whatever that means. Daisuke is mostly considered a "Jock" sure he is. Miyako though was considered an "outcast" or a "nerd". That really bothered me in my book she was everything but those names. I have only been in this school for two weeks and I see how the rest of the students treat her.... treat my Miyako. I don't see how and why the others put up with it, I have had Dais and Taichi stop me from getting into a few fights because of it.
" Oh Ken hi!!" Hikari said looking up from her fruit salad as sit down between Dais and Takeru.
"Hello everyone " I say.
"So how is everyone's day going so far?" Daisuke asks. This is just the everyday conversation that we have.
"Good" said Hikari.
"Fine", that was Takeru.
"Boring" which is my usual answer.
"Great!" beams Miyako, which was certainly not like her.
" Oh really?" I ask, "and just what makes this particular day so great?"
" Oh nothing really" she says with a glint in her eyes.
" OK Girl spill it" Hikari joins in.
"It's just one of those days Kari" Miyako winks.
"You have a date don't you!!" Takeru grins ear-to-ear "fess up".
A date! I dropped my head and prayed and prayed that she would deny...
"How did you guess" she squealed!
Crap...
"Because I know who it is"
"But how..."
"Oh come on Miyako he has only had a crush on you since the day you became one of us maybe even before. You should hear him sometimes drone on and on about you should I ask her out or should I not blah blah blah". Takeru says to a very red Miyako now.
One of us?? That must mean that it must a destined but who?? No one here ...no wait it couldn't be him ..it must not be him.
"Really??" Miyako asked still blushing.
"This is all and great but who is it" Daisuke finally speaks up. He had been quiet up till then, which is very unusual for him. Normally he would have loved to have the chance to take to pick on Miya about this but instead he had been staring at me through the whole thing watching me. I wonder if he picked up on how I felt about her...I had wondered how I had kept something like this from my jogress partner maybe I didn't. But if he knew why didn't he say anything to me. But he also maybe is waiting to see what I think of the entire situation too.
"Koushiro!" Takeru and Miyako both said at the same time "Jinx" yelled TK.
I felt like I was going to faint. I should have known Koushiro would ask her out. The signs were all there, the way he always would hang around her. But why did she say yes especially to him. Don't get me wrong I don't hate him or anything but there was always this feeling of rivalry coming from him towards me. It may have been the whole Kaiser thing but most of the kids have gotten over that, actually I think I am the one that dwells on that the most now. I always get the feeling that I am stepping on his feet. He liked to think that he was the "brains" of the group and didn't like the idea of me encroaching on his territory. Every time I came up with a theory I would have to defend it like I was defending a thesis in college and usually saying "well that could work but let's try this instead". Could work my ass and now he had to go and ask Miyako out.
I bit into my apple slowly and found that my eyes were feeling a little tight and itchy.
"What's wrong ken? You haven't said but maybe two words this entire lunch period" Daisuke looked at me with concern and maybe knowing.
" I just don't think I slept very well last night and I hate my History teacher if it's not in her text book then it never happened" I grumbled.
"I'm sorry maybe we should have you write her a new one and exchange it behind her back so then she will have all the facts" My angel said halfway joking but halfway serious too. She never lost faith in me or my genius. She understood what I was going through and I usually found myself pouring out all my problems to her. She would never ridicule when I tell her how much I don't want the life of this genius anymore...she always supported me. I think that's one of the main reasons why I love her so much.
I felt myself blush then almost start crying again.
"Listen guys I need to go I forgot I had to do something" I say,
"Yeah I better go to I forgot to help you do something that you forgot" Daisuke adds.
"Yeah ok catch you guys later" Takeru looks at us very strangely while Hikari and Miyako are giving us looks like we were going to rob a bank or something. I just nod to them quickly and head out at a fast walk with Daisuke beside me.
"That was the worst lie I have ever heard," I whisper to him on the way out.
"Dude! I thought it was ingenious and totally unable to be proven otherwise," Daisuke says proudly
I couldn't help but chuckle at my best friend as I head outside.
"Dude where are we going?"
" Dude I am going to get some fresh air, I don't know where you are going" the statement was meant as a subtle dismissal that of course went totally over Daisuke's head.
He just followed me over to the tree I was heading to and plopped down beside me when I sat down. I picked up a piece of grass and started playing with it while we sat in silence for a while.
Daisuke finally broke the silence.
"Why don't you tell her how you feel and quit playing with that piece of grass your going to get a cut".
"What!" I jerked my head around to look at him I know that my face by then was totally drained of color and I probably looked like death warmed over.
"Your the genius ken some blades of grass are..."
"That's not what I was questioning"
"I know hehe," he laughed " seriously though you are crazy about her and you are totally blowing any chance you have with her. "
" Again what are you talking about Daisuke and I swear if you start talking about grass I will..."
" Oh don't go all Kaiser on me Ken Ichijouji I am talking about Miyako and you full well know it. I might not be the brightest light bulb in the box but I am your jogress partner and you can't hide that kind of emotion from me."
Daisuke went silent and I just dropped my head, what else could I say. I felt something wet hit my hand, and then another is it raining? I look up and then I feel it on my cheek. Oh great!! I am crying now.
"This is tearing you up inside, come on don't get into the same situation I am, you're too good of a guy for that. I know I have no chance with Hikari but I love her still the same. The thing is Ken you have a chance with Miya." Daisuke said while digging through his backpack for a tissue for me.
"It's not that simple Dais, I don't think she feels for me the same way and don't forget about Koushiro" saying his name in a growl as I accepted the tissue.
"How do you know? Why don't you go right now and....."
"And what confess my undying love to her and that I have loved her so long that I die a little each time she looks at me and all of that."
"Well no actually I was just going to say ask her out on a date, but that would work too. Seriously though Koushiro and her aren't an "item" yet and it's only one date."
Ring
The bell rang signaling lunch is over.
I rubbed my aching head and sighed to Daisuke " Just drop it Dais and swear to me that you will not say anything to anyone"
"But Ken" Daisuke whined.
"Dais swear it to me" I know I was starting to go all neurotic again but I couldn't help it. I guess because I had no friends as a child that now I am friends with the destine that I am so scared of loosing one of them. I am so scared of being lonely like before and this is the main reason why I can't even dare risk loosing Miyako by confessing my feelings.
" I think you making a mistake but I swear it."
****
Classes are finally over and I get to go to soccer practice. As soon as Dais found out that I would be coming to this school he convinced me (or nagged same thing to him) that I had to try out. Of course I made the team, the one thing that I had learned was that I actually played very well when I was just having fun and soccer is just one of my passions.
On the way to the field I saw something that almost made me turn around and run right then and there. It was Miyako and Koushiro walking together across the field engrossed in a very quiet conversation. I actually had to swallow hard as not to vomit. I immediately made up my mind that I would try to take the long way around as not to torture myself anymore than I had to.
"KEN!!!"
Luck was just against me today. I looked up and saw Daisuke running towards me and also didn't have to look over to know that his scream had notified the couple of my presence and they were heading my way. Miyako and Koushiro reached me first as they were actually closer, when I looked up I saw a very happy Miyako and a very peeved looking Koushiro.
"Ken hey you going to practice now?" My angel said with smile plastered on her face.
"Yeah, that's the one thing about being on sports team you have to practice" I said with a slight smile.
"Even the rocket has to practice huh??" she giggled
I just rolled my eyes.
"Hey Ken your early good! You know how Taichi hates it when anyone is late" Daisuke said as he finally caught up to us. Taichi is now captain of the school's soccer team and I always feel a little nervous around him still.
"Hypocrite," Miyako laughed, " Since when is Ken known to be late. The only reason Taichi gets so peeved at you is because you're always late!"
This actually got me to laugh a little since I knew very well that she was right.
"Ahem!"
"Oh sorry Kou I know that we have to get going."
"Well it's not that I don't find the topic of sports and tardiness invigorating it's just that we do have to get to the computer room without delay so we can set up for the club" Koushiro is the president of the computer club and Miyako is vice president. It is almost unheard of that a junior hold that status and still surprising that a freshman is in office too. Miya had tried to convince me to join but between Soccer and my other studies it would be just too much. Actually the thought of being in the room with Koushiro running the show that long was also not to my liking. So I thought the best way to avoid a bad situation was just not to join.
" Oh yes of course sorry Kou," then she turns and looks at me "it's still a shame that you couldn't join the computer club this year we would have had a blast"
"Yes a shame" said Koushiro...Did he just smirk at me??? Why the little ugh control yourself Kenny boy.
"Well soccer is my number one passion, I like computers don't get me wrong but I don't want to stretch myself to thin again."
" We wouldn't want that happening, come on Miyako-chan let's hurry bye Ken later Dais"
" Uh yeah catch you both later" Miyako flitted away with Koushiro following.
Chan?? Chan!!! Did he just call my Miyako chan? Not only was he smirking he was gloating. Like he knew I had a thing for her and he was rubbing my face in it. Well I tell you what little Mr. computer whiz you don't want to cross...what the hell am I thinking, Koushiro may be a little competition for me but I am starting to think way to many bad thoughts for my liking. Besides I am not a very spiritual man but the one thing I do believe in is Karma and believe me one day .........
"Ken...yoo-hoo kennnnn!!!!"
Why is something brown flashing in front of my eyes? Oh yeah Dais he he.... boy Kenny your loosing it.
"Huh?"
"Earth to ken"
"Davis get your hand out of my face please"
"Well I have only been waving it in front of your face for the last two minutes"
"Oh"
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No"
"You sure"
"Uh...no I mean yeah I mean I dunno"
"Hey tomorrow is Friday and why don't you plan to spend the night over and we can talk or just play video games or something"
Friday.yeah Miya has her date of Friday doesn't she. Well maybe having someone with me will be a good idea. (A/N no this is not heading towards a Kensuke)
"Grrreeeeaaat!!" Daisuke said sounding a lot like that cartoon tiger.
I couldn't help but laugh I have got to have the weirdest and greatest friend of all times.
" I am looking forward to it but we better hurry because if were late Taichi is going to skin us alive" I said still giggling.
All of a sudden Daisuke looked very serious, " oh no Taichi!"
" Come on if we hurry will get there on time"
"Race ya" Dais said with an evil grin " and this time I will certainly win"
"As if " I said and took off like a bolt...they didn't call me the rocket for nothing.
How did the race go well even though I won we didn't beat the clock. Taichi decided that for a punishment Dais would have to do 20 laps around the field after practice and that I would have to count them. When Daisuke started to complain Taichi just gave him one of his looks and explained that since this is my first time being late then he was going to cut me some slack. Personally I think Taichi just gets a kick out of watching Daisuke squirm a little. I also think that Taichi sees the same talent in Dais that I do and if he would just take himself seriously then he would be an incredible player instead of the mediocre one now.
****
The next day I was starting to feel a little bit better about myself. Maybe Dais was right, maybe I should confess all to her especially before her date tonight. I made up my mind, come on Ken if you can stand up to Malomyotismon then you can tell a girl how you feel.
Again I sat in history class and listened to this lovely person recite from a textbook I began to think of ways on how I was going to tell her. Once I made up mind I set my jaw in determination and started to relax. Right after lunch all or nothing.
When I walked into lunch I almost turned around and ran out. Sitting with the others was non other than Koushiro. What is he doing here? I thought he had 2nd lunch with the older destines. Daisuke saw me come in and looked at me as if to say sorry what could I do. Well there goes all thoughts of confession; there is no way I could confess now. Not with him here I should just go somewhere else. Wait what am I think these are my friends too and soon I became determined on something else. I was not about to let him drive me away from my own lunch table. So I walked over and sat in my usual spot in between Dais and Takeru.
" Hey guys," I say giving my best grin (which in all honestly comes out as only half a smile, but hey for me that's good.) "Koushiro hi, I thought you had second lunch how did you manage the switch?" When I was the Kaiser I wasn't known for beating around the bush so I didn't."
" Hey Ken, I used to only have a study period before lunch so it didn't really matter when I took it so I moved my study period to after lunch so I can starting coming to lunch with you guys."
"That's cool" Takeru said oblivious as usual to what was happening.
" I thought it was sweet," Miyako said batting those lovely eyelids at him.
I could feel myself wanting to run at the moment. No stay, Ken don't let him run you away from your friends.
" Oh Ken you still coming over tonight"
Thank you Daisuke something else to think about.
"But of course"
As Dais and I started to plan out our evening the next question really caught my attention.
"So you two, where exactly are you going tonight?" Kari asked winking at Miyako.
"I don't know", answered Miyako honestly "Kou is surprising me..."
Miya couldn't finish her answer as Anita and her group walked up to our table.
" Hey Kari Takeru Ken" Saying my name with a wink to me. I took note that she totally ignored the others sitting at out table. How dare she treat Dais and Miya that way?
" Hey Anita" TK said giving her a glare. I was just praying someone would drop a house on her.
" I will never understand why you guys sit here." Then she turned as if seeing the other three for the first time sitting there. She gave one of her friends a small side-glance and I was getting a nervous feeling about this. So," she said sitting next to Miya " I heard that you actually have a date. I think that is wonderful that someone of your social stature is trying to act normal."
I could feel myself getting extremely angry at this blonde hair freak how dare she talk down to Miya.
" Yes as a matter of fact I do though I don't see why you would waste your time on something that doesn't concern you" Miyako said defiantly...Go Miya
"Yes she is going out with me" Koushiro spoke up.
" You??? Ooohh how sweet nerds in love. Ok hehe that makes sense, well what does your kind do on a date? " She asked with a glint of amusement.
Before she could answer I couldn't take it anymore.
"What do you mean their kind?" I say in a very low soft voice.
"Ken!" she gasped. She turned to one of her friends who were nodding excitedly seeming to forget her question. Though obviously a few hadn't as they kept snickering and staring at the couple. Miya looked like she was about ready to cry and Koushiro looked lost. He had always had Taichi and Yamato to back him up. Well I might not like the guy a whole lot right now but he is one of us and I wasn't about to let anyone be mistreated by this witch.
" You didn't answer my question Anita. What do you mean their kind?"
" Ken your actually talking to me" she seemed thrilled and I felt sick.
Takeru looked like he wanted to hit someone and Hikari was trying to calm him and Daisuke down.
"You have not answered my question and I will not ask it again." This was a cold statement not a request this time. I also saw other destine turn around and stare at me I guess I am sounding a little to Kaiserish for their liking. Well I am pissed damn it and I don't care.
Anita at least lost that fan girl look to her." you know what I mean Ken. The two brain nerds are not like you and I. I mean how much fun can they have besides messing around with some computer or whatever they do in their spare time? I mean it's not like they have a real life or anything."
I laughed, not one of those rare endearing laughs that Dais and Miyako can usually draw out of me but that hard cold cruel laugh. All they see in this school is Ken the soccer star, Ken this kind of cool guy that has some how has gotten in good with the ladies, the guy that used to be on TV all the time. They have forgotten exactly why I was on TV and where I came from..
"Actually Anita I AM just like them and what's wrong with messing around was some old computer. What do you think I do on the weekends when there isn't a soccer game going on go to parties and shit like that."
I was now standing up and leaning over the table glaring at her. The others are staring at me now I think I am scaring them oh well I will have to make it up to them later.
"What do you mean Ken?" Anita was starting to get very uncomfortable under my gaze.
" Oh come on Anita I don't go to any of your parties or any of your friends and you know why?"
"Why?" she asked in a small voice.
"Because I can't stand you and your kind." Throwing her words back at her. "Have you forgotten exactly who I am and where I came from? How do you think I won all those COMPUTER awards in the first place huh?? Come on even someone with your obvious lack of brain space can figure that one out. The only reason that I don't belong in their little computer club is that I am too busy with soccer as it is. The reason I left the Tamachi School for the gifted" emphasizing the word gifted, " was so I could be with my friends here in Odaiba and if I am not hanging with my friends which includes EVERYONE at this table, then usually I am at home coming up with a new program that I will not even bother trying to explain to you."
I was gasping for breath red as a beet and probably ruined my entire popularity thing I had going but I actually felt better.
The whole lunchroom had gotten silent I had gotten a little bit loud by the end.
Anita just looked stunned...."ok then... well ...uhh...yeah anyway come on guys let me show you this new dress I am going to buy I have the catalogue at my locker" Anita and her "group" fled as quietly away as possible the lunch room started to get noisy again as it was obvious the excitement was over. That is except for our table.
I think I stunned everyone, I know I lost my temper but god damnit I am not going to allow someone to speak to any of my friends that way especially Miyako. I don't think they know what to say right now.
That was until " Dude if you had brought out that whip I was going to run as fast as possible"
I just looked at Daisuke and raised an eyebrow while Miyako and Takeru became red while trying to stop their laughter. Hikari was just shaking her head and Koushiro was staring at me. Then I started laughing myself as I realized that Dais was completely serious so I decided to poke a little fun too. "Nah you wouldn't have to worry about the whip.... but the sunglasses yeah the sunglasses those you should be scared of"
At that both TK and Miyako let loose holding their sides and Hikari had her head down in her arms laughing. As soon as Dais realized I was joking he just grinned ear-to-ear chuckling and again Koushiro just stared at me. I didn't care at that moment I just really didn't care.
Word got around quick and Taichi and Yamato came up to me in the hall and asked me if I could help them by being their body guard since I had the entire school scared around me. This was all in fun of course and I told them they wouldn't be able to afford me now that I was in such demand. Yamato joked around and asked me as a favor to a fellow digi-destine if I could get rid of Daisuke's sister Jun for him she was driving him bonkers He was kidding of course, well I think he was anyway. They just laughed and Yamato thought about giving me a noogie but my death stare made him think different. I told him if he really felt the need to noogie someone right then and there Dais should be going to Math and that he would be more than happily oblige him.
I turned around to head towards my advanced chemistry class when I notice Sora and Miyako talking down the hall away. They seemed to be in a deep conversation and I thought about going down to say a quick hi when I saw Koushiro come up to them and place his arm possessively around Miyako's waist the whole time watching me. I thought I had caused enough of a seen today and as much as I wanted to speak to Miyako before the weekend started I just turned to go to my class. It was probably better like this anyway.
*****
After school I was standing outside waiting on Daisuke praying that he didn't get detention or anything when Miyako came running up to me. I was about to ask her where Koushiro was since he was not with her when she threw her arms around me. I didn't know what to do when she buried her head into my neck and I could feel her hair against my face. The beautiful lilac hair that I have grown to love and adore smelled so sweet I don't think I have ever been as happy as that moment.
"Thank you" she whispered from my neck.... I couldn't resist but wrap my arms around her also. He waist was so slender that I was afraid I was going to break her.
"For what?" I whisper from her hair I could feel a heat going through me this closeness was starting to affect me.
" For today" she was so close and gave me kiss on the cheek. I thought I was in heaven then she pulled away and looked up into my eyes, "and being my friend"
Now is your time Kenny boy do it...
"Uh Miya, uh...." she looked deep into my eyes waiting for what I was about to say.
"MIYAKO" oh shit no I looked up and saw non other than Koushiro himself smugly walking up. " Are you ready?"
"Huh Kou oh yeah sure" she turned back to look at me for me to finish what I was going to say.
"What were you going to say Ken?" she asked.
Come on Ken think fast, "on nothing more than your welcome". Boy was that lame, obviously she thought so too.
"Well ok " she said slowly" then she turned to Koushiro. " I forgot my jacket be right back."
"Ok I will meet you at the car ok"
"Sure OK, and Ken you and Dais behave yourselves" she gave me a quick wink and went racing back into the school.
I was lost in thought to myself about how dumb I was when I heard Koushiro speaking to me.
"You really think you had a chance with her?"
"Huh? What are you talking about Izumi? " I growled at him.
"You know what I am talking about, just face it Ken you're a wannabe. The real genius of the group is me not you. I have known Miyako longer than you and you never stood a chance. Not considering how close we were. I still have the towel she brought back from her Kyoto trip in the 7th grade hanging up in my room. She knows what it meant to me. Did she bring you back anything?"
"That's an unfair question and you know it Koushiro things were different then. I wouldn't count one gift that she got you 3 years ago such a special thing" I was arguing for my sanity but his words held so much sting in them. He was right she always did favor him over me, I never stood a chance. This was the reason why I never confessed my feelings to her.
"You better go she will be waiting for you" was all I could mutter.
He didn't say a word started to walk away with just glance over his shoulder once at me and this time I knew for sure that he was telling me to get lost that this was his girl, he won and I lost.
God I hope Dais' is more fun tonight than this I have never been so happy and complete one minute and so lonely and miserable the next.
I was busy staring at the retreating form of Koushiro going over his words again and again that I was startled a bit when a hand was laid on my shoulder.
"Ready Kais... I mean ken?" I turned around to see Daisuke standing there giggling.
"You know only two people would ever be able to get away with that joke" Giving him a mock stare.
"Well I guess I am lucky then aren't I " He said with bravado.
"Are you sure that your one of them" He just looks at me " I will give you a 10 sec head start " I said just as evilly. He took off like a flash to his apt and I followed by him. The race was something I needed, I had to get the anger out someway and to run it out was better than beating the shit out of a little red head. I was so lost in thought that I didn't realize that I had passed Dais along while ago and at his apartment way before him. As I leaned on the door waiting for him I just couldn't get Koushiro's conversation out of my head, when I finally heard the pounding of footsteps I turned to see Davis flying up the stairwell.
"Geez Ken!" He gasped for air "Now even I see why they call you the rocket"
I groaned good ol' Daisuke I hoped he could put up with me because something told me that this would be a long night tonight.
TBC