Disclaimer:
J.K Rowling owns the characters and the setting and Linkin Park own the song.
Damn them! Wish I had the talent to write the way they both did!
A/N
For all of you who read my song fic, I'm going insane, and reviewed, you
rule. Some of you told me to write more, so here's another part. This is to the
song Crawling, also by Linkin Park. It's continuing the story of Sirius in
Azkaban.
Crawling in my skin, these
wounds they will not heal
Sirius
gripped his head. "Get out, get out, get out, get out! I won't stand this
anymore. I'm not letting those Dementors take me. I'm sane and I'm innocent. I
think it's time for Padfoot to make an appearance." He changed into the large
black dog.
Fear inside my bones,
confusing what is real
'I'm
never going to get out of here am I? I'm never going to see the blue sky, or
the green grass, or even breathe fresh air again. I'm going to die in this
place. I can't let that happen. I can't let Peter get away with what he did! He
has to pay for what he did. He has to pay.' The dog paced backwards and
forwards in the cell.
There's something inside me
that pulls beneath the surface, consuming, confusing
This lack of self control I
fear is never ending, controlling, I can't seem
'At
least I have this power. They couldn't take that away from me. I'm not going to
give in. I might be stuck in this cell, and I can't do anything right now, but
I will get revenge. I'll show Peter Pettigrew exactly what traitorous scum like
him deserves!'
To find myself again, my
walls are closing in
I've got a sense of
confidence, I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take
The
dog looked up at the walls of the cell. 'Hey this is really small when I'm a
dog. It's almost like the walls have shrunk.... No the walls are not shrinking.
The walls are not shrinking. It's ok. You just got bigger. Oh no. The walls are
shrinking. Let me out, let me out, let me out.' He changed back into a man and
collapsed onto the tiny bed.
I've felt this way before,
so insecure
"God
I have to stop doing that," Sirius
exclaimed. "I'm going scare myself to death one day. The walls aren't going to
shrink Sirius. This place is really taking its toll on me. I have to just close
my eyes when I change that's all. Then I won't be able to see the walls."
Crawling in my skin, these
wounds they will not heal
Fear inside my bones,
confusing what is real
"Everything
is fine. I can take this. Remember what you were saying last night. There are
only two things I have to think about. I'm innocent and the guy who put me here
is at Hogwarts. All I've got to do is go to Hogwarts and find that rat. He's a rat in more than one way.
DIRTY STINKING SCUM." He yelled, and kicked the door.
This confidence in me has
pulled itself upon me, distracting, reacting. Against my will I stand beside my
own reflection
"Take
a good look at yourself Sirius. That's it. Take a good long look. You're acting
like the rest of the filth in here and you don't want to do that do you. You
have to stop yelling like that. You are NOT insane, you are innocent and you'll
get your revenge."
He
took a deep breath and sat back down on the bed.
It's haunting, how I can't
seem
To find myself again, my
walls are closing in
'It's
getting harder to change back into a person,' Sirius realized. 'I really have
to concentrate. On NO. God I'd better not get stuck like that. I have to get
out of here before something even worse happens.'
I've got a sense of
confidence, I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take. I've
felt this way before, so insecure
Sirius
stood up and looked down at himself. "Man I'm thin now. Maybe I could fit
through the bars." He walked over and tried sticking his head out the cell
door.
"IDIOT!"
He realized, and pulled his head back in. "Are the Dementors just going to sit
there and let you escape hmm? God I'm DUMB sometimes."
Crawling in my skin, these
wounds they will not heal
Fear inside my bones,
confusing what is real
"Hey
they'll bring me food soon. I know what I'll do. I'll change into a dog and I
can get out of the door. I'm so thin now they won't notice. I'll escape. I'll
be free. YES! I'm A GENIUS!" He yelled, the clapped a hand over his mouth.
'Quiet you git,' He thought. 'They'll hear you.'
Crawling in my skin, these
wounds they will not heal
Fear inside my bones, confusing
what is real
He
sat at the foot of the bed, in his dog form. He was waiting for the Dementors
to come and bring him his food so he could get out the door. The dog was
panting, and looked as though it had some sort of grin on its face.
'God
I hope I can stop blaming myself for what happened. It wasn't me. It wasn't me.
It was Peter. I made the biggest mistake of my life telling James and Lily to
change secret keepers, but that doesn't mean I killed them. It doesn't mean I
killed all those Muggles either. I'm innocent and I'm going to show Peter
Pettigrew exactly how angry his old friend Padfoot
can really get.
There's something inside me
that pulls beneath the surface, consuming, confusing
Confusing what is real
The
Dementors opened the door. The dog leaped at the opening and ran through it.
The Dementors were confused. They couldn't understand. They didn't know he was
a dog. He was free.
'I'm
FREE!' Sirius yelled inside his head. He could feel the power in the dog's legs
as it swam through the water. 'I'm finally free.'
This lack of self control I
fear is never ending, controlling
Confusing what is real
'Hey,
hey! Sirius calm down! Get a bit of self-control. Swim that way you DOPE. Over
there. Hey. Come on. That way. It great, I'm free. I've wanted this for 12
years but that doesn't mean I should be swimming the wrong way. There we go.'
He
let out a bark, a quiet one. There was time for celebrating later. Right down
he had to get down to the task ahead of him.
'Keep
your eyes on the prize Sirius. Think about what's ahead of you. Don't get
confused.'
The
dog swam on, coming closer and closer to the shore.
