The Wealth of Knowledge At My Fingertips.
CJ POV
Angst
Notes: Continuation of CJ POV''s
Author: Cappuccino Girl
Disclaimer: The West Wing and all that goes with it belongs to Aaron Sorkin, Warner
Bros., and John Wells Productions. Thanks for the inspiration. Summary quote from
'Mischief and Control' by Vonda Shepard.
Summary: 'There is a stranger in all of us that we try to get to know. There is a wise
woman in there too, trying to run the show.'
~* *~
He stands all proud and full of the authority he lives from. I follow his hands as they
gesture, failing to clarify his phrases. He grins every now and then. They exchange
words, so eloquently phrased, and I wish that I was able to understand the true
nature of the conversation. By stature I am far taller than he, yet I feel small, small
and ignorant for in spite of all my studies, I cannot grasp this.
Can't they notice my bewilderment? Is it so hard for them to see?
'That makes sense, doesn't it, CJ?'
What shall I say? I can't admit that I didn't understand, for that would only give Leo
more reason to take my words, my position, lightly. He already does so at times. I
despise him when he is like that, but I would never say such a thing. It would be
harsh and unprofessional, and I do not wish to be known as such a person.
Shall I crack a joke? Amuse, then confess my failure.
'Yes, I'm all the wiser. I'd better go and prepare for the briefing'
It's easier that way, but I know it is wrong. I feel my shoulders slip forward. Why must
I be the stupid one in the room? I glide towards the door. Out there no one knows,
and no one will know but me. Life spins around, never stopping, and I appear in
complete control.
~* *~
CJ POV
Angst
Notes: Continuation of CJ POV''s
Author: Cappuccino Girl
Disclaimer: The West Wing and all that goes with it belongs to Aaron Sorkin, Warner
Bros., and John Wells Productions. Thanks for the inspiration. Summary quote from
'Mischief and Control' by Vonda Shepard.
Summary: 'There is a stranger in all of us that we try to get to know. There is a wise
woman in there too, trying to run the show.'
~* *~
He stands all proud and full of the authority he lives from. I follow his hands as they
gesture, failing to clarify his phrases. He grins every now and then. They exchange
words, so eloquently phrased, and I wish that I was able to understand the true
nature of the conversation. By stature I am far taller than he, yet I feel small, small
and ignorant for in spite of all my studies, I cannot grasp this.
Can't they notice my bewilderment? Is it so hard for them to see?
'That makes sense, doesn't it, CJ?'
What shall I say? I can't admit that I didn't understand, for that would only give Leo
more reason to take my words, my position, lightly. He already does so at times. I
despise him when he is like that, but I would never say such a thing. It would be
harsh and unprofessional, and I do not wish to be known as such a person.
Shall I crack a joke? Amuse, then confess my failure.
'Yes, I'm all the wiser. I'd better go and prepare for the briefing'
It's easier that way, but I know it is wrong. I feel my shoulders slip forward. Why must
I be the stupid one in the room? I glide towards the door. Out there no one knows,
and no one will know but me. Life spins around, never stopping, and I appear in
complete control.
~* *~