A/N; Omigod. Gah!! Reviews overwhelming. Not enough time to type chapter and all the thank yous. No!!! But I can type a chapter or thank yous. I think you'd rather have a chapter. I'm going to have to think of a way to thank you all because I truly and dearly love and thank you all for all the encouragement. (Note to self: find good way to thank reviewers) This chapter probably isn' it though!
***
Seamus knocked on the door to Bill's office, pinching himself to make sure he was awake. "Come in," Bill called. Seamus opened the door, hesitantly and stepped inside.
"Have you got a moment?" Seamus asked. Bill smiled.
"For you? Of course. What is it, Seamus?"
"Well it's a very tangled tale, but I'll try to keep it simple. I've been lusting after Draco for a while now." Bill flashed him an odd look. "Stay with me, this will become relevant. Anyway, last year he and Harry hooked up." Bill raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, it was this big mushy deal, absolutely adorable, really. Then on the Hogwarts Express, Draco calls it quits, for some reason involving his father. But he and Harry don't tell anybody. They just act all mopey and depressed and- Are you getting all of this? Or am I talking too fast?"
"I can speak Seamus. I understand," Bill laughed.
"Rock on. Anyway, they act all mopey and depressed. I was able to coax out of Draco the news that they had broken up, being highly skilled, of course."
"By 'skilled' you mean 'annoying'."
"Of course. Draco used Veritaserum to find out why I got involved and got me to confess that I wanted him. Well I kissed him and one thing led to another and-"
"I get the picture," Bill interrupted.
"Right," Seamus said, blushing. "Things didn't work out between me and Draco because he still loves Harry and I like somebody else."
"And who's the lucky guy."
"You," Seamus admitted, having the decency to look highly nervous. Bill's jaw dropped.
"Seamus, I-" *'m not gay. I'm already involved. I don't feel the same way,* Seamus thought. Nothing came.
"For Heaven's sake, say something! You're killing me!"
"I'm older than you."
"I don't care."
"I'm your teacher."
"That's fairly obvious. Look if you don't feel the same way, tell me. I can handle it."
"That's not it."
"Then what is?"
"This is just a bad time. I can't-"
"So this is a 'no'?"
"This is a 'try again in two years'," Bill replied. Seamus smiled.
"It's a date!" He frowned.
"Problem?" asked Bill.
"Harry. I've got to apologize to him. I might not even live two years, not that I'd blame him."
"That's true. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes."
"Kiss for luck?" Seamus asked, kissing Bill thoroughly. He pulled away with a devilish grin. "If I'm not back in an hour, I want white roses at my funeral!" he called, dashing down the hall.
"That is not fair," Bill laughed, staring after him.
Seamus caught up with Harry right after he made up with Draco. "Harry, I need to talk to you."
"Seamus, just forget it."
"But-"
"No buts, just forget it, okay? In some warped way you're the reason I'm so happy right now."
"Warped is right. Explain?"
"Draco and I are back together."
"Harry, that's fantastic!"
"And the sole reason you're still breathing," Harry added.
"Naturally, but really, that's wonderful."
"Yes, if it wasn't for you and Draco having sex, I never would have found out why he broke up with me in the first place."
"I'm terribly sorry about that, and I swear it will never happen again."
"See that it doesn't," Harry said cheerfully, walking away. Seamus let out a huge sigh of relief.
"Seamus Finnigan, you are the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet," he laughed.
*Sorry! I love Seamus too much to hurt him. (This should be another chapter, but...)*
The Hogwarts Express was full of nervous students that Christmas holiday, especially the compartment with Ron, Neville, Harry, Draco, and company. "Don't worry," Neville whispered, squeezing Ron's hand.
"Yeah. Cheer up, Ron," Harry said, resting his head on Draco's shoulder.
"You two are so sickeningly sweet, how could she possible object?" Draco added. Hermione glanced at Greg. He smiled in return.
"What's the worst that could happen?" he asked, addressing the entire compartment.
"Mum could yell at me, lock me in my room for the rest of term and send me to Beauxbatons for my seventh year," Ron wailed.
"Remus could have a heart attack," Harry said, thinking about his own 'discussion.'
"My father could kill me," Greg replied with mock cheerfulness.
"Gran could cal me a disgrace and disown me," Neville said.
"Lucius could kill us all, slowly and painfully," Draco offered. For a moment there was dead silence.
"Well, I think that takes the cake," Vincent said brightly.
"Cake or death?" Hermione giggled.
"What?" Ron asked incredulously.
"Cake or death?" Harry repeated, smiling.
"What's wrong with the cake?" Vincent asked.
"Nothing," replied Hermione.
"Cake, then," Vincent said suspiciously.
"Draco?" Harry asked.
"Cake or death?" Draco mused. "Cake, definitely cake. Neville?"
"Cake."
"Harry?" Hermione asked.
"Cake."
"Sorry, we're out of cake."
"Out of cake?"
"Well, we only had three pieces and we weren't expecting such a rush."
"So my choices are death or death?"
"Basically."
"Okay, I'll have the chicken platter," Harry replied. He and Hermione burst into giggles, and everyone else just stared.
*That's what happens when you let people with Muggle blood into Hogwarts. You get complete Chaos* Vincent thought.
"No, love, I'm complete Chaos, and I go wherever I please," said a voice. Vincent turned to see a small wizard in black robes and leather boots with black hair that sparkled with silver glitter.
"I beg your pardon?" Vincent said.
"Insanity, Randomness, Silliness, and complete lack of Order. That's me. Also known as complete Chaos."
"As opposed to incomplete Chaos?"
"Don't get smart with me!"
"Wouldn't dream of it. You wouldn't be able to understand."
"Why you-" Chaos said, lunging at Vincent. There was a popping noise and Chaos was forcibly pulled off of Vincent.
"Why'd you stop me?" Chaos asked, turning around to face Pointlessness. "Oh, it's you. I was expecting someone else."
"We're not supposed to interfere directly with the story."
"Damn. And I really wanted to punch him. Can't I just-"
"No. Besides, he might hit you back."
"So?"
"Wouldn't want to ruin your face now, would we?" Pointlessness said. Chaos flashed him a wry smile and they both vanished.
"Oh my God, they do exist," Ron, Neville, Draco, and Harry cried simultaneously.
***
If you don't understand the 'Cake or Death' bit, don't worry. It's like me expecting you to understand the line "You can't wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you" when you've never seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Review!
love,
J. Silver
***
Seamus knocked on the door to Bill's office, pinching himself to make sure he was awake. "Come in," Bill called. Seamus opened the door, hesitantly and stepped inside.
"Have you got a moment?" Seamus asked. Bill smiled.
"For you? Of course. What is it, Seamus?"
"Well it's a very tangled tale, but I'll try to keep it simple. I've been lusting after Draco for a while now." Bill flashed him an odd look. "Stay with me, this will become relevant. Anyway, last year he and Harry hooked up." Bill raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, it was this big mushy deal, absolutely adorable, really. Then on the Hogwarts Express, Draco calls it quits, for some reason involving his father. But he and Harry don't tell anybody. They just act all mopey and depressed and- Are you getting all of this? Or am I talking too fast?"
"I can speak Seamus. I understand," Bill laughed.
"Rock on. Anyway, they act all mopey and depressed. I was able to coax out of Draco the news that they had broken up, being highly skilled, of course."
"By 'skilled' you mean 'annoying'."
"Of course. Draco used Veritaserum to find out why I got involved and got me to confess that I wanted him. Well I kissed him and one thing led to another and-"
"I get the picture," Bill interrupted.
"Right," Seamus said, blushing. "Things didn't work out between me and Draco because he still loves Harry and I like somebody else."
"And who's the lucky guy."
"You," Seamus admitted, having the decency to look highly nervous. Bill's jaw dropped.
"Seamus, I-" *'m not gay. I'm already involved. I don't feel the same way,* Seamus thought. Nothing came.
"For Heaven's sake, say something! You're killing me!"
"I'm older than you."
"I don't care."
"I'm your teacher."
"That's fairly obvious. Look if you don't feel the same way, tell me. I can handle it."
"That's not it."
"Then what is?"
"This is just a bad time. I can't-"
"So this is a 'no'?"
"This is a 'try again in two years'," Bill replied. Seamus smiled.
"It's a date!" He frowned.
"Problem?" asked Bill.
"Harry. I've got to apologize to him. I might not even live two years, not that I'd blame him."
"That's true. I wouldn't want to be in your shoes."
"Kiss for luck?" Seamus asked, kissing Bill thoroughly. He pulled away with a devilish grin. "If I'm not back in an hour, I want white roses at my funeral!" he called, dashing down the hall.
"That is not fair," Bill laughed, staring after him.
Seamus caught up with Harry right after he made up with Draco. "Harry, I need to talk to you."
"Seamus, just forget it."
"But-"
"No buts, just forget it, okay? In some warped way you're the reason I'm so happy right now."
"Warped is right. Explain?"
"Draco and I are back together."
"Harry, that's fantastic!"
"And the sole reason you're still breathing," Harry added.
"Naturally, but really, that's wonderful."
"Yes, if it wasn't for you and Draco having sex, I never would have found out why he broke up with me in the first place."
"I'm terribly sorry about that, and I swear it will never happen again."
"See that it doesn't," Harry said cheerfully, walking away. Seamus let out a huge sigh of relief.
"Seamus Finnigan, you are the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet," he laughed.
*Sorry! I love Seamus too much to hurt him. (This should be another chapter, but...)*
The Hogwarts Express was full of nervous students that Christmas holiday, especially the compartment with Ron, Neville, Harry, Draco, and company. "Don't worry," Neville whispered, squeezing Ron's hand.
"Yeah. Cheer up, Ron," Harry said, resting his head on Draco's shoulder.
"You two are so sickeningly sweet, how could she possible object?" Draco added. Hermione glanced at Greg. He smiled in return.
"What's the worst that could happen?" he asked, addressing the entire compartment.
"Mum could yell at me, lock me in my room for the rest of term and send me to Beauxbatons for my seventh year," Ron wailed.
"Remus could have a heart attack," Harry said, thinking about his own 'discussion.'
"My father could kill me," Greg replied with mock cheerfulness.
"Gran could cal me a disgrace and disown me," Neville said.
"Lucius could kill us all, slowly and painfully," Draco offered. For a moment there was dead silence.
"Well, I think that takes the cake," Vincent said brightly.
"Cake or death?" Hermione giggled.
"What?" Ron asked incredulously.
"Cake or death?" Harry repeated, smiling.
"What's wrong with the cake?" Vincent asked.
"Nothing," replied Hermione.
"Cake, then," Vincent said suspiciously.
"Draco?" Harry asked.
"Cake or death?" Draco mused. "Cake, definitely cake. Neville?"
"Cake."
"Harry?" Hermione asked.
"Cake."
"Sorry, we're out of cake."
"Out of cake?"
"Well, we only had three pieces and we weren't expecting such a rush."
"So my choices are death or death?"
"Basically."
"Okay, I'll have the chicken platter," Harry replied. He and Hermione burst into giggles, and everyone else just stared.
*That's what happens when you let people with Muggle blood into Hogwarts. You get complete Chaos* Vincent thought.
"No, love, I'm complete Chaos, and I go wherever I please," said a voice. Vincent turned to see a small wizard in black robes and leather boots with black hair that sparkled with silver glitter.
"I beg your pardon?" Vincent said.
"Insanity, Randomness, Silliness, and complete lack of Order. That's me. Also known as complete Chaos."
"As opposed to incomplete Chaos?"
"Don't get smart with me!"
"Wouldn't dream of it. You wouldn't be able to understand."
"Why you-" Chaos said, lunging at Vincent. There was a popping noise and Chaos was forcibly pulled off of Vincent.
"Why'd you stop me?" Chaos asked, turning around to face Pointlessness. "Oh, it's you. I was expecting someone else."
"We're not supposed to interfere directly with the story."
"Damn. And I really wanted to punch him. Can't I just-"
"No. Besides, he might hit you back."
"So?"
"Wouldn't want to ruin your face now, would we?" Pointlessness said. Chaos flashed him a wry smile and they both vanished.
"Oh my God, they do exist," Ron, Neville, Draco, and Harry cried simultaneously.
***
If you don't understand the 'Cake or Death' bit, don't worry. It's like me expecting you to understand the line "You can't wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you" when you've never seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Review!
love,
J. Silver